Lost Memories

Chapter 20

After a while Steve comes back to us and sees me sitting on a chair everyone around me looking worried. "What's going on?", he asks. Bucky tells Steve what happened. Now there is one more person trying to tell me to go and rest.

"How do you think that I can go and take a nap, when my brothers could be in danger?", I ask them. Vision then suggests that I should try to meditate and get a connection to Loki. "That is the first good suggestion, thank you Vision!", I tell him. I go to my room with Bucky, Steve, Nat, and Bruce. Bruce didn't want to come at first, but Nat told him that if something happens we need someone that can take care of me medically. I sit down on a pillow, close my eyes, and rest my hands on my lap. I start to breathe like Vision has thought me. It takes a minute, but eventually I find the peace. To everyone else's surprise, I start to float in air. I get my fiery glow on me now. I start to think about Loki. I start to search for the connection. I can feel him. He is close. I concentrate even more to where he is and suddenly, I disappear. Bucky, Nat, Steve, and Bruce are now standing in my room, wondering where I am. I am standing on a grass field. I see my brothers standing in front of me. In the distance there is an old man.

"Loki. Thor. Where are we?", I ask my brothers. They both turn and simultaneously ask, "Halla, why are you here?". The old man turns around when he hears my name. "Halla? Halla. Halla!", the man says. Three of us are now looking at the old man, that is trying to sign us to get closer. "My three children are finally together.", he then says. I look at the man and finally realize who he is. "Father?", I ask. The old man that looks like his life is on the end of line looks at me and smiles. "Only reason why I was able to give you away was the knowledge from the Norns. The three Norns, deities that keeps everyone's destiny in their hands. They told me that you will be reunited with your family before it is my time to pay for my mistakes. And here you are. My beautiful daughter. My little angel that finally mended my broken heart. My precious girl that brought peace to our land with her life.", the old man, Odin says to me.

Tears are falling from my eyes. At the same time, I am feeling happiness and sorrow. "You gave me away as a payment. You betrayed me, the fire dragons, and my beloved phoenixes. You destroyed our family!", I am now screaming at him and the flames around my body have ignited. My hair is again changed to this reddish colour.

He looks at me calmly and smiles. "Look at you now. Can you feel that power? It is your birth right. You carry the flame of the phoenix everywhere you go. You have their powers, and they are your companions. You have the nurturing and healing warmth inside of you. There is even more than that. You are more powerfully than any of us can even imagine.", Odin tells me while caressing my cheek with his hand. "I have made mistakes with each and every one of you my children. And now is time for me to pay for them.", Odin says. Something tells me that he is not telling us everything.

I have now calmed down and the flames are gone. My hair is still reddish, for some reason it didn't turn back to its original colour. Odin sees my confusion when I realize my hair colour hasn't changed. "This is what you were born with. I think you are ready to know everything.", he continues. He holds his hand up and two ravens fly on it. He tells us that they are the Muninn and Huginn. They used to bring him information from Midgard. They represent the memory and mind. All three of us, me, Loki, and Thor, are now staring at these ravens. And suddenly Muninn screeches loudly. Pictures start to flash in my mind. Pictures, memories, feelings about my family, about my past. It's like they all came back to me. I assume that Loki and Thor saw everything that I did, because they both grabbed my hands in theirs and they both looked like they were about to apologize. But Odin talks first.

"I know that I was never the father that you wanted or deserved. I hope that one day you all understand that everything I have done is for my family, for you my children. I know that you will do the same for your children.", he says and smiles to me and continues, "I am sorry that I won't be here to see my first grandchild, but I know that she will be loved.". Odin turned around, looked at the horizon and said his last words, "I am finally reunited with my beloved Frigga. She was a warrior that protected her family no matter what. We are reunited eventually in Valhalla.". He gasps air and his body starts to shimmer. In few moments, he is gone. We are still standing there and looking at nothing.

"What did he mean with the talk about grandchildren?", Loki asks. Everything that happened made me already forget, why I wanted to connect with them in the first place. "Oh, right, that. I am pregnant.", I finally manage to say. Loki is staring at me, but Thor pulls me into a huge gentle hug. "I am going to be an uncle?", Thor asks, and I nod to him. Loki takes my both hand in his and looks at me with tears starting to form in his eyes. I hug him. He places his chin on my head and holds me for a moment. After that he takes my face in between his hands, looks into my eyes, and tells me, "I will always protect you and this little one. I would give my life for you two.". Suddenly I feel both of them hugging me at the same time. I feel calm and even my hair is getting back to its normal colour. Expect that I have even more reddish highlights now. We are all laughing and smiling. I can feel the love around me.