Foster Life

How Much Time (Kyler's POV)

"No..."

"I'm sorry. I needed to be the one to tell you."

"Is there a recovery process?"

"But it was too late for me."

"What do you mean...?"

"There's nothing they can do. They want to but they can't."

"How long?"

"What?"

"How long Alice!?"

"They say I only have at most a month."

How was I going to cope with this? I love her. Why is this happening to me and her? We didn't do anything wrong. Why now is this happening? Why couldn't we do this later on in life. I bet you they could save her. Why wouldn't they try? This was a lot for me to take in and honestly I'm still trying to get a grasp of what she said to me because I'm still confused. I was thinking about the fact that Alice said they couldn't save her. Why couldn't they? There was no way it was really too late. What if Alice didn't want to go through the thing that she did to get rid of her cancer. But why wouldn't she. She shouldn't want to leave me behind here in this world. There is no way that she isn't getting saved because she doesn't want to be saved. There was no that that's what she felt that she didn't need saving. Two weeks later Alice was getting weaker and she couldn't do much. I carried whenever I was around. I wasn't ready for the month to be over. I didn't want to have to say goodbye to her. I wasn't ready for any of that, she said that I probably would be easier if I didn't say goodbye and I just let the whole thing just go the way that she hoped. These last couple of weeks will be hard to go through. What if Alice didn't want to go through the thing that she did to get rid of her cancer. But why wouldn't she. She shouldn't want to leave me behind here in this world. There is no way that she isn't getting saved because she doesn't want to be saved. What if she felt like she didn't need to be saved? What if she thinks that since this is happening to her is a sign that it's time for her to join her parents?

Alice was going into the hospital today. The doctors said that it won't be long and that it won't be painful for her. They said that we should say goodbye to her. David and Martha went first. They said that they wished that it didn't happen this soon. They wanted to adopt her but they can't at this time. Next was Lexi. She said that she wished she actually treated her like a sister and that she wished that she was nicer to her in the beginning. She also apologized. Alice told her she didn't have to apologize. There was nothing to apologize about. Then it was my turn. I didn't know what to say.

"Kyler, I know this is hard but you need to understand that it's time. I had to choose this. I..."

"Alice I understand that you got to choose whether or not you can go through the chemo. But this is hard on me. I'm losing you because you made this choice. I'm not mad at you but I'm not going to be okay with this decision. I LOVE YOU! But I'm going to lose you."

"Kyler. Please understand that I need to do this."

I had to walk away. I couldn't listen to her tell me that she thought that she needed to do this.