Everything You Never Had

Deep breaths

Noah and you end up spending all morning together. The majority of the time is spend with you asking more and more questions and freaking out. When the both of you stand at the front door together, just before he's about to leave, you say your goodbyes.

"Now, don't forget," He begins. "I'll pick you up tomorrow at 9. The appointment is set at 10 a.m. so we'll have plenty of time to get there."

"I'll be ready." You tell him reasuringly.

"Good. See you tomorrow then." He gives you a quick kiss on the cheek and he's out the door.

"Bye Noah." You just want to show your gratitude one more time. "Thank you!" You say with a raised voice, so he can hear it down the hall.

You close the door and go back into your office. Before you're able to work any further, you let your mind process what has happened, and what will happen.

So, I'm going to meet Cate Blanchett and actually work with her. What is life right now...

The hours spend tomorrow will purely be as an introduction. You get to tell her your way of working - she'll probably make clear how she goes to work - and you can further inform her about the project. The actual shooting will start at the beginning of next week.

This time tomorrow you will be at her house; you will have spoken to her; you will have touched her, if only for the brief handshake-moment.

She has a hard time leaving your mind, and you end up getting no work done for the rest of the day. In the evening you get some takeout from your favorite sushi place nearby. You decide to go upstairs a bit earlier then usual, but before you go to bed, you take a nice, long, hot bath.
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You wake up in the middle of the night. Checking the time on your phone, you see it's 3 a.m.. Damn. Just when I need all the rest I can get. You toss and turn, unable to fall asleep. Just when all hopes of falling back to sleep are lost, worry begins to make an imprint in your mind. You call Noah, in the hopes that he can calm you down.

After a couple of rings, you hear a groggy voice on the other end of the line. "It's 4 in the morning." From the tone of his voice, you can tell he's not very pleased.

"What do I say?" You rapidly say with a deep sense of worry.

After a few seconds you hear his voice on the other end. "What?"

"Noah, what do I say to her."

Another few seconds pass by "What do you say to who?"

"What do I say to Cate?!" You try to make clear. "I can't just brabble on about everything and anything."

You hear a slight sigh through your phone "Y/N, relax. You've done this hundreds of times. This isn't any different"

"You're joking right?" You say flatly. "Noah, this is totally different. She's totally different." You know that he tries to calm you, but it's not working. Not in the slightest.

"Just try to get some sleep and I'll do the same. See you tomorrow."

Before you can add anything, he hangs up.

"Just try to get some sleep." As if you haven't already tried.
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You wake up after a fairly sleepless night. In the first seconds of waking up, your mind always needs some time to adjust. After those seconds, you begin to realise what you're up to. With panic in your eyes, you hoist yourself right up. In a few hours you're going to meet Cate Blanchett.

Before you get up, you take a few deep breaths and tell yourself it's all gonna be just fine.

Time seems to move too fast when you go through your usual morning routine. Before you know it, you've went on a run, took a shower, got dressed and have had some breakfast. You take your seat on the couch before getting up again after about a minute to the sound of the doorbell. It's 9 a.m. sharp. You wouldn't have thought otherwise with the punctuality of your assistent.

The steps you take towards the door feel heavy.

"Goodmorning." Noah says with a full on smile.

"Morning." You carefully say. "Let's go, before I change my mind. I'm too nervous."

"No need." Your best friend chuckles. He deliberatly look you up and down. "You're looking as radiant as ever."

"Thanks but that won't do. Now let's go." You motion him outward before you step out in the hallway yourself and close the door behind you.

Unlike the swift morning, the car ride seems to take hours on end. It's a quiet drive; Noah can sense that you're not up for talking, so the both of you just sit in silence, with your assistent behind the wheel. After a little less then an hour, you arrive at the house. You've known the absolute beauty of the mansion by the pictures that you've seen, but it looks even more astonishing in real life.

Your heartbeat increases while the car pulls up the long driveway. Your hands start shaking by the time the the car is parked. Noah turns the key and the motor goes silent. He looks at you and notices the trembling of your hands.

"You have to calm down." He takes your shaky hands in his own. "I get that you're nervous, but you have to relax."

You look down at your hands before you look into his eyes again.

"Because once you relax" He continues. "you've always been truly yourself." He can see that you just need a bit more convincing. "Y/N you're the most inviting, charismatic and confident person I know. Once you relax, that is. So please, do."

The nerves you felt moments ago, vanish. "You're right." You say. "Just about always."

Taking a deep, deliberate breath, you feel ready. You both get out the car and make your way to the front door. Despite of feeling ready, every step you take seems to feel heavier then the other.

Noah rings the doorbell and takes a few steps back to position himself just behind you. After a few seconds, you hear footsteps that are coming from the other side of the door.

Deep breaths Y/N. Deep breaths.

The door begins to move, and with the blink of an eye, she stands before you.

A/N

Next chapter will include Cate, I promise! The build-up was long, I know. Hope you enjoyed it though.