Me in This World
Ronnie has always been controlled by life, and after a year in France with her fiance, away from the hold me downs, she has to return back to the states for her wedding where she faces some of the biggest tribulations in her life, putting the couple's relationship, her sanity, and his happiness at risk.
When Francis got in bed, I was still in my world. I hadn't noticed. I wasn't expecting him to turn me and pull me into his chest. My sobs uncontrollably broke out.He hushed me.
It's moments like this that I want to say everything is going to be fine and it will work out and that it doesn't matter whatever happens. It doesn't matter the issues I have. It doesn't matter the issues we have. It doesn't matter the issues I have with him or that he has with me. We might not be perfect but we are love.
Also, I'm not going to blame it on him because if I don't say anything that makes it my fault, right? Besides, it would be petty for me to blame it on him. I remember in my teenage years that there was no one to do what he does. I wasn't as alone anymore. I dare not call myself a mess, now as I did then, but I was still messed up.
"What's wrong?" He asked softly when my crying slowed. How did he even know something had been wrong. I was complete quiet before.
"Nothing . . ." I said lying. I didn't want to talk about it because then I'd have to say that it really started with him cutting the conversation off and then those awful, painful feelings crept up and then I was crying and felt alone because he wouldn't hear me out.
"Just because I can't see it doesn't mean I don't feel it," he cradled me in his arm and used his other hand to wipe away the tear stains on my face before interlacing our hands.