"Okay Nina, do me a favor and stay on the phone with me until you get home, alright?" I ask her calmly. "I'm in your driveway, I haven't pulled out yet. I'll be waiting for you."
"Okay." She responds in a breathy whisper.
"Take some deep breathes for me, yeah?" I tell her in a gentle tone.
She's quiet on the other line but I can hear her following my instructions as we practicing inhaling and exhaling together.
Soon enough, her car drives into the driveway right beside mine and I watch Nina get out. She looks over to me for a split second and I'm able to spot the way her nose has gone runny and pink along with access of her running mascara, right underneath her eyes from the tears she has shed.
Getting out of my own car, I follow her into the house and shut the door behind me. We both enter as she sits down on the couch, burying her face into her hands with sniffles.
As badly as I'd love to hold her in this moment, I'm not sure whether to touch her because I don't know if that's what she wants.
Instead, I take a seat beside her and carefully begin to move closer. I then feel her lean in towards me, laying her head onto my chest before she breaks down into full on sobs. My body goes tense for a moment, not really expecting her to do this but then soon relaxes within her touch. I wrap my arms around her shoulder, pulling her even closer towards me and rubbing her arm in a comforting manner.
"What's going on angel?" I ask her soothingly. "What can I do? Please, let me help."
Her body is trembling as if she's been freezing for hours. She's letting out strangled sobs in my arms and I try my best to ignore the gut wrenching heartache that I feel in this very moment.
We may not have ended on the best terms but one thing I can say is that I'll always be here for Nina.
I love her and it kills me to see her like this. So distraught and in pain.
Nina has always wanted to look a lot tougher and stronger than she actually was. She's always been one to bottle up her emotions, which was never a good idea. She's rarely ever cried in front of me in the years we'd been together but in the moments she has cried, I think she's cried the hardest. Which lures me to believe that this must've been really bad.
I was never the best at holding in my emotions like she was. I'm so open when it comes to expressing myself and that's something that Nina has always been afraid of because she's the complete opposite.
I'm not sure if she's cried at all in the past 6 months, hell I know I have.
And in this moment, it almost seemed as if everything she's been holding in for months has just poured out all at once.
20 minutes later, I'm still holding Nina in my arms, rocking her back and forth. Her weeping has turned into small cries and then from there into short breathy gasps. She's still shivering but I've been trying my best to soothe her by running my fingers through her dark hair, which seems to be working.
"I got fired." She mumbles into my chest.
"You got fired?" I repeat in a low voice, not really being sure if I'd heard correctly. "Why?"
"I don't know." She hiccupped. "He told me he needed to make a change, my efforts weren't enough- I don't understand. I've done so much."
Still holding her against me, I take a deep breathe as I listen to her thoroughly.
Always hated that dick.
"Why do I manage to fuck up everything good that happens in my life?" She mumbles nearly close to tears all over again. "I feel like I've lost so much." Her voice cracks.
"Nina.." I say sadly.
"That's what it feels like right now. Like I've fucked up everything for myself."
I'm not sure what to do except hold her. I love her and I can hear the hurt in her voice.
"Nina, he's a dick. None of what he said is true, alright?" I reassure her. "Believe me when I say you're the most hardworking woman I've ever known. You've always overworked yourself with that asshole and you're one of the most talented writers I've ever met."
"You're just saying that..." She responds in a whisper.
I grab her chin and tilt her face up, guiding her sight from the ground up to my eyes. "Nina, please look at me." I say softly. "Believe me when I tell you that you're so incredibly talented. You wouldn't have gotten this far if you weren't."
She shakes her head sadly and I watch the tears stream down her cheeks, one following after the other.
"There are so many other job opportunities waiting for you that will treat you so much better. Tons in the world." I say to her. "I know you've worked so hard but there's something way better out there waiting for you."
She finally pulls away from me with a sniff. I reach over and catching the tears that fall from her cheeks with my thumb. "I'm sorry." She croaks out painfully.
"Why are you sorry, angel?"
"For being a bitch." Nina says. "I'm sorry for hurting you and for not being there for you and Lenny. I feel so guilty and I know it's because I am. I was being so fucking selfish and I said so much shit to you. Neither of you deserved that. I'm sorry."
"You're not a bitch." I say, watching her attentively before she looks away. "I forgive you, Nina. Although, I think we both said a lot of hurtful things." I admit. "All I wanted back then was to talk to you about how I felt but I hurt you in the process and for that, I'm sorry. I think we could have communicated a lot better."
"I agree." She says exhaling a deep breathe, sounding more like relief. "And I forgive you."
This is all I ever wanted. For months, I've felt so helpless and I had no idea how to repair my relationship.
Although I know we're not quite there yet, this might be a start to re-build it.
"Are we okay?" I ask.
"We're okay." She nods.
-
It's been two hours since I've had that talk with Nina.
I can tell she's still stressed and worried about losing her job but I tried my best to take her mind off of it by giving her a number of options we could do.
Eventually, we both agreed to watch 10 Things I Hate About You. Nina chose it out, knowing it was both one of our favorites.
Thats pretty much how we both ended up in bed with a bowl of sweet and salty popcorn between us.
Her eyes were glued on the screen but she wasn't paying attention to the film. Instead she was zoned out, staring blankly at it with a worried expression.
I missed sharing nights like these with Nina.
After months without her, it felt nice to have her laying right beside me.
Of course, I wish this was happening under better circumstances.
As the movie continues, my attention turns towards the scene where Kat is getting pep talked by her father about boys.
"That's gonna be me with Lenny in the future." I blurt out.
Nina let's out a chuckle, not moving her eyes from the screen.
There's that pretty smile.
"You know, I used to think kissing boys would get me pregnant..." Nina shyly admits.
She's finally speaking up. We're making progress here.
"And how did you come to the conclusion that you wouldn't fall pregnant?" I ask her curiously.
"Kissed a boy." She shrugs.
I had already known how that story went down. Nina and I had both told stories about our first kisses when we were first dating.
I had mine at the age of 12, I'd ditched school with my first girlfriend and had ran into a large field. That's where I'd made my move.
Nina told me she had hidden behind a large willow tree back in primary school at the age of 10 with one of her classmates. He told her to close her eyes and she said she could sense what was about to happen but didn't hold back because she really liked him.
"I had no idea how I was going to explain it my parents." She says with a light laugh making me smile. "I kept my first kiss a secret for about 3 weeks until I confessed to my cousin and she'd given me a sex ed lesson." Nina says making me throw my head back with a laugh.
"Alright, 'tell Lenny kissing boys will get her pregnant'...I've got to write that one down." I joke making Nina laugh.
"In a way I think I was kind of right though. Kissing did lead to pregnancy..." She mumbles in thought.
I give her a smile and she turns her head towards me. "Absolutely no regrets, right?" I tell her.
"Wouldn't change it for the world." She says honestly.
Fuck.
I'm so in love with her it hurts.
Nina turns her attention back onto the screen in front of us, tugging on the ends of her sleeves and hugging herself.
"Are you cold? You can scoot closer if you'd like?" I offer. I was very comfortably wrapped in a blanket Nina had let me borrow while she, the other hand had only changed out of her work clothes into a plain black hoodie and gray shorts.
She hesitates for moment before moving the popcorn to the bedside table and slowly scooting closer to me. I open up the blanket, preparing to throw it over the both of us but I'm caught by surprise when Nina lays right into my arms, her back resting against my chest.
My heartbeat begins to increase at the feel of her and for some reason I'm growing nervous by the second. My face feels to be gone bright red and I'm thankful for the lights being off in this moment.
There's a small victorious feeling leaping inside my stomach as I decide to reach my arm over and wrap it around her waist. "Is this okay?" I ask.
"Yeah." Nina responds softly, nodding. She places her hand over mine, giving it a reassuring squeeze and I feel myself about to burst with excitement.
Fuck. This is actually happening.
I try my best to focus on the film rather than the woman laying in my arms when suddenly she slowly turns her body towards mine. My arm is still wrapped around her waist and our faces are now leveled down to each others.
Smiling, I lean my forehead against hers as she intertwines her legs with mine, bringing our bodies even closer.
Lifting her hand, she gently caresses my cheekbone with her skinny fingers, drawing them down to my jaw. My eyes flutter shut at the feeling of her touch and the hot of Nina's breathe fanning over my lips.
Before I know it, I feel the pressure of her plump lips pressing against mine placing a long, passionate kiss. It almost seems like she's punched the air out of my lungs for a second as I take a hold of her cheek feeling her mouth move against mine.
The first kiss is soft and sweet but as soon as I pull away, I lean forward coming back for a much longer and needy one. Opening my mouth again, I let her tongue slip into mine, sitting up and tugging her even further towards me. She decides to crawl over me, placing her knees on each side of my hips. The pit in my stomach starts to feel more and more intense as I feel her trail short wet kisses down the side of my jaw and neck.
Nina pauses to suck on the skin, making me moan at the sensation and feeling the way she bites it gently, swirling her tongue sure enough to leave a mark the next morning.
Once she pulls away, my hands slowly start to make their way down the sides of her hoodie, stopping right on the waistline of her shorts.
Resisting the urge to tug her against my groin, it was almost as if she's read my mind because that's exactly what she does next. She rolls her hips against my center and I hold back a moan when she slowly begins to circle her hips.
My jeans grow tight as I snap my hips up to meet Nina's swift movements, my eyes never daring to look away from her pleasured expression. I pay attention to the way her eyes are screwed shut, her now swollen lips meeting mine as I catch every moan she lets out.
I'm a panting mess at this point with my head falling back in pleasure as I listen to the small whimpers slipping past her parted lips.
It's intense, consuming and I just wanted to freeze this moment and feel it forever.
My hands slip under the ends of her hoodie and I take a hold of her hips tightly, guiding her movements harder and faster against me. I groan out an audible, "Oh, fuck".
Nina leans down to press another deep kiss and I can feel the pit of my stomach building up with more and more pleasure by the minute.
I take a hold of her hips to stop her, holding them still as I pull away from her lips with a pop. "W-We should stop..." I pant trying to take control of my breathing. "I want this, I promise I really do but I don't think it's a good idea at the moment."
Nina stares down at me, a little bit shocked and just as out of breathe as me before she lifts herself up and lays beside me.
"Oh- okay, yeah." She nods. "I think you're right, I'm sorry."
"No, don't apologize." I tell her trying to catch my breathe. "That was- it was great."
Nina lets out a laugh and I give her a nervous chuckle watching her get comfortable as she leans her elbow on the mattress with a palm resting on her cheek.
"Cute." She mumbles to me before placing another kiss on my lips.
I freeze as she pulls away and scoots closer to me, hiding her face into my neck.
She wasn't upset with me?
We stay in this position for a while, me rubbing her back and playing with the ends of her hair to relax her. A small gesture that I've learned over the years calms her down.
When I can sense that we're both falling asleep, I reach over for the remote to shut the film and television off.
Now in a completely darkened room, my eyes start to feel heavier and heavier when suddenly I feel Nina's voice speak up.
"Harry?" She whispers causing shivers down my spine at the feel of her breathe on my neck.
"Yes, Nina?"
"Thank you." She says softly.
"Anything for you." I respond.
-
A/N:
(Did you catch that Golden reference?)
Thank you for reading!
This is a start to building up their relationship and I'm excited!
-n