On the ride back to Hogwarts I don't say a single thing. Draco explains to Walter that it's probably shell shock from what I had to do over the holiday but he doesn't tell Walter what it is I did. Remind me to thank him for that.
Every time my wand is in my hand I hear screams. George has been trying to talk to me ever since the first night but I haven't responded. I don't know how to tell him that I've killed seven people. How do you tell someone that?
Nine hours later and we are all pulling our trunks off of the Hogwarts Express. The carriages waiting for us. Walter and I both step off the platform and walk down the dirt path to the carriages.
"Are you alright Vi?" Walter whispers to me.
I sigh and look up from the ground at him, "No. I'm really not okay. But I sort of have to be don't I?" I whisper. I look to my left where Draco is supposed to be but no ones there, "Draco?" I spin around and see him standing on the platform still, staring at the carriages, staring at the Thestrals.
"What are those things?" Draco says as I walk back up to him.
I put my hand on his shoulder and smile sadly, "Thestrals. You can only see them if you've seen someone die. I'm sorry." I whisper the last part to him.
"So... you can see them too?" He says looking at me. I nod a couple of times. He looks back at the carriages, "Ugly bastards aren't they?"
Draco hops off the platform and he, Walter, and I all load up into a carriage and are pulled off towards the castle.
"You're boyfriend's waiting for you." Draco points out when the castle comes into view.
George is standing on the front steps of Hogwarts looking awkward and very stressed out. As soon as the carriage comes to a full stop George runs over and helps me out and onto the ground. He kisses my forehead and pulls me into a hug.
"I've missed you so fucking much." Kiss, "Are you alright?" Kiss. "What happened after that day?" Kiss.
"I'm fine yeah. Sorry I didn't get back to you after that day. It's just been a lot. Meeting my parents and everything." I say to him. Draco steps off the carriage and walks around George. I look at him over George's shoulder, he doesn't say anything but he nods and heads inside.
"Course yeah... Are you alright though? I mean course you're not alright but I mean..." George trails off looking into my eyes. I don't have to say a word for him to know that something isn't right, "Hey, are you not telling me something?" He whispers. He brushes stray hairs out of my face.
"No, nothing. Just tired. Walk me back to my common room?" I half-whisper.
George nods. He takes my trunk from me and holds it in one hand, the other hand holding mine. We walk quietly through the halls, listening to the low rumble of chatter coming from everyone around us.
"So what are they like? You're parents?" George asks me after a while.
Instantly I can't breathe, "Uhh, well my father's really tall. Super skinny. I've got his nose and his eyes... and hair I guess cause his is black too. But um, he didn't say anything. Not a single word. Just sort of looked at me a lot."
George looks at me, "That's sort of..."
"Weird yeah. But I mean I guess that's what happens when you've been locked away in a prison for fifteen years. My mothers a lot though. One second she's really soft and I dunno, motherly? And the next second she's angry and yelling. The only person besides my aunt that can calm her down seems to be the Dark Lord."
George doesn't say anything for a minute and I can tell that he's thinking long and hard about what he should say, "I'm sorry."
"You have nothing to be sorry about G. It's just what it is," I say back to him quickly.
George stops me and pulls me over to the wall so that we can talk and not be in the way of anyone. "I don't have to be at fault to be sorry." George puts my trunk down and takes both of my hands in his. "There's something that you're not telling me."
"No there's not. Stop pushing me."
"Stop pushing me away! Tell me what happened. What actually happened!" He lowers his voice cause he's noticed that people are staring, "Please baby. Let me help you."
A few tears fall down my cheeks and I wipe my face on my shoulder, "George I killed seven people. What can you do to help me with that?" I sort of snap at him.
George let's go of my hands and I let them fall limp to my sides, "What do you mean that you killed seven people? You told me about the one... I thought that was it. I-"
They made me do it once a night, a different way each time. The Dark Lord called it dinner and a show." I chuckle to myself trying to lighten the situation a bit, "My mother cheered me on, begged the Dark Lord to let her have a turn. But he said it was my responsibility. I had to kill it. That's what he said. It. Like the people in front of me were nothing. Meant nothing." I wrap my arms around myself and hold myself tightly.
George doesn't do anything for a minute then he pulls me into his chest and holds me tight. Instantly I start to cry. Everything that I tried to keep inside comes pouring out. Here in George's arms, the realization hits me like lightning. I've killed someone. I killed multiple someones.
"I won't leave Hogwarts. I'll stay with you." George says into my hair.
I pull away from him just enough to see his face, "No. You've got to go. Get out of here, bring smiles to people's faces." George opens his mouth to say something but I kiss his lips to get him to stop. "I'm serious."
"Then it's tomorrow. Five o'clock. In the front entrance." George says.
"You're mums gonna hate it," I say to him.
George smiles, "At first yeah, but she's going to love it in the long run."
I look at George and smile at him a bit, "I mean... If tomorrow's you're last day here..."
George looks at me confused, "You're joking, right? Violet you've got tear stains on your face."
"Help me feel good," I whisper.
George laughs a bit and looks away, "Baby..."
I take his chin in my hand and pull his attention back to me, "Please?"
"You can't bury your problems with sex Violet. It's unhealthy" George says to me.
"That's not what I'm doing? I'm trying to be with my boyfriend before he leaves school and goes to run a joke shop because the world is on fire and I don't know when I'll see him again." I say louder than I should have.
"How about... I walk you to your common room, we drop off your things, you change into sweatpants or something and we walk the halls and talk, joke around? Pretend like we are in third year all over again?" George says to me, "Cause that sounds a lot more enjoyable to me."
I nod, "Yeah that sounds perfect." George picks my trunk up again and we start walking down the corridor. "Thank you," I whisper.
"Course my love."