I take one last look in the mirror, double-checking my makeup, hair, and clothes for tonight.
Winged eyeliner with some natural foundation and dusty rose lipstick? Check. Black mini skirt, maroon lace crop-top, and my favorite leather boots? Yup. Taming my wavy brown hair into soft simple curls? Well...it's as good as it's gonna get.
I'm half tempted to create a mental checklist too. Ava's been texting about the party non-fucking-stop all day and nonchalantly let it slip that overly-perky cheer captain Brandy White included our new West Count classmates when inviting people. I shouldn't be surprised, of course she'd invite the entire school, she always does. But since finding this out, I've been second-guessing everything; clothes, makeup, the health of my sanity, and patience for dealing with any extra bullshit.
"You can't dodge me for long." Jace's words echo in my head for the third time today.
I huff at the mirror. Jace is right; I can't keep trying to avoid him. If I ran every time there was a chance of bumping into him somewhere, I'd miss out on a lot; school games, dances, classes, and parties are just the first four to come to mind.
I shake my head at my reflection. I'm not doing that to myself.
Slipping my phone in my bra and grabbing my tiny handbag, that will most likely get left in Caleb's truck, I head downstairs. He's supposed to be here soon so we can head to the party together. Marcel's getting Ava. They already texted to say they are running late since A is in the middle of trying on a hundred different outfits.
I walk into the kitchen to grab my house keys and stop in my tracks at the sight of my mom sitting at the kitchen table. Her laptop glows in front of her, illuminating the chestnut strands that have come loose from her messy bun and hang in her face. The light casts shadows on her face, making the bags under her eyes seem darker and bigger than the last time I saw her.
With a glass of red wine in her hand, she looks up and smiles softly. "Hey, honey."
God, she looks exhausted.
"Hey, Mom." I wave and head to the key holder along the wall. "I didn't know you were home yet."
A long and weary sigh leaves her lips. "Yeah, I just got in not that long ago. I think you were in the shower."
I nod, walking over to take a seat in front of her. "Feels like it's the first time I've seen you in weeks."
"I know, honey." Her face pinches together with guilt making the bags under her eyes more pronounced as she reaches her hands across the table and places them on mine. "I'm so sorry. Hours at the hospital have been crazy and us nurses are so under-staffed. Most of us have been pulling swing shifts just to try and make up for it."
It's hard to be upset with my mom. What she does is a noble profession that not everyone's cut out for but what we need so many of. She literally saves lives. I've always been proud of her; she's a hero.
But I do miss her. We don't get much time together and even less since she started dating Carl, the owner of a small coffee shop across from the hospital. He makes her happy, which makes me happy, and I know he misses her as much as I do when she's stuck working long hours like this.
"It's fine, Mom." I nod and smile. "You know I'm always here when you got time. Just might wanna check in with Carl. Pretty sure he's called or stopped by a couple times."
Or more than a couple of times.
She returns the smile before yawning. "Sleep first. Tomorrow's my first day off in a long time. I'll get ahold of him in the morning and who knows," she shrugs, "maybe we can all go to dinner tomorrow night."
Standing up, I attempt another smile, but it's strained. Carl and Mom need time alone, even if that means I'll have to wait my turn. "We'll see. Not sure what time I'll be back tomorrow."
Mom lost a lot when we lost Dad. I was just a baby, so it's hard for me to miss him the way she does. For me, I miss what I don't remember having, what could've been. As for Mom, she still mourns his death to this day, but Carl's lessened that pain in the year they've been together. He's healed a big portion of her heart, and even though he never complains, I always worry that if they don't make time to be a couple they might lose what they have.
I can't let that happen.
Mom squints her eyes, the same greenish hazel color that looks back at me in the mirror every day. "I thought you were just going to a party. You're not coming home after?"
"The party's just a few blocks from Ava's house, so we planned to go back there afterward."
"Okay." Mom nods just as a horn honks outside. "Better not keep Caleb waiting." She wiggles her eyebrows at me, insinuating for the billionth time that he and I are more than friends.
I roll my eyes. "Love you, Mom."
"Love you too, honey."
Grabbing my keys and handbag from the table, I turn to leave.
"Alexis..."
"Yeah," I turn back to see Mom's warm smile, her eyes lit up more than before.
"You look beautiful."
My heart swells as I rush back and hug her tightly. "Thank you, mom."
Brandy White's house is the best place for a party this big. The two-story colonial is filled from top to bottom with teens drinking and dancing. Jocks are playing beer pong in the dining room while any girl in a short skirt shakes her ass on the designated dance floor in the living room. Well, almost every girl in a short skirt.
I've parked my barely covered ass in the kitchen, nursing some kind of fruity wine cooler that Ava insisted I try two seconds before she left on a manhunt.
"Momma needs some sugar," she stated, making me cringe at that creepy image, right before she dove into the crowd of shoulder-to-shoulder bodies.
Marcel wandered off too. He spotted the DJ hire for the night and nearly ran to go pick his brain, hoping to learn a few things thanks to his fascination with all things music. Caleb, on the other hand, has been my lifeline.
The two of us lean against the kitchen counters watching partygoers act a fool and laughing at the faces a bunch of lower classmen make as they try, what I assume, is their first-ever shots of alcohol.
"Oh, she didn't like that one." I grimace at the poor girl with glasses and freckles as her face starts to resemble a fish.
Caleb snorts. "There's a reason that drink's called Pucker."
The two of us laugh some more when I feel eyes on me for the tenth time tonight.
Jace and his guys showed up with some girls a few minutes after Caleb and I got here. He's kept his distance, thankfully, but that doesn't stop him from starring every chance he gets. I've been trying my best to act like I haven't noticed.
If I can't avoid him, then I can damn well ignore him.
Sipping my drink, I make a conscious effort not to look by the back doors, and in attempting to avoid locking eyes with Jace, I wind up connecting with Derek's from across the room. His warm gaze holds mine for a second before turning frosty. Looking away, he returns to his conversation with some guy.
Deflated, I sigh into my drink.
I really need to talk to him.
He's been avoiding me all week, and I have a sneaking suspicion as to why, but can't do anything until he agrees to talk to me. Which will be hard to do when he seems so set on mentally giving me freezer-burn.
"Hey, do you wanna dance?"
I jerk to the side. A pretty petite girl with jet black hair stands in front of Caleb, looking up at him with big doe eyes. She's cute, and the heart-eyes ready to pop from her skull is a clear sign she thinks he is too.
I watch them like I'm watching one of Ava's romance movies. This is the part where the boy and girl dance, and sparks fly. They'll probably go somewhere private after and have an adorably deep conversation, getting to know each other. Probably start with their favorite color or something else of equally less importance.
The only thing that could make this better is a bowl of popcorn. Instead, I sip my drink and wait for Caleb to answer her.
"Uh..." he stammers. "I'm not a great dancer."
What?! That is not how this movie is supposed to go.
Wow, I must be getting bored, or tired. Who compares real life to movies? Me, apparently, when at a party with nothing better to do.
The girl shrugs. "Me either, but that's the fun part. Right?"
Caleb scratches the back of his neck before looking at me. "You mind if I..."
I can't contain the eye roll. It has a mind of its own.
"Oh, my gosh!" The girl covers her mouth with both hands. "I didn't realize you had a date. I'm so sorry."
My eyes shoot open wide. "No. No, we're just friends." Why do people always assume that? "You two should totally dance. Go, have fun."
"You sure?" His green eyes narrow, watching me carefully with a glimmer of hope.
No, Caleb, I plan to keep you hostage all night so you have as little fun as possible.
I nod, shooing him away with my hands. "Yes, absolutely. Go."
The corners of his mouth tip down but the girl's already wrapped her hand around his arm, dragging him to the other room.
I know he's just trying to be a good friend, but I hate when he treats me like a worried mother. Caleb passing on a good time just to stay and babysit me is ridiculous. I don't need him sacrificing his good time for me. There are plenty of other people I can talk to; I'm not some social pariah.
Speaking of which... I look around again.
Derek's still hanging out with a friend but this might be the best chance I get. Downing the rest of my sickly sweet drink, I place the empty bottle on the counter and make my way across the room. I keep my head held high, even when he glances at my approach and turns in the opposite direction.
The cold shoulder, great start!
"Hey." I tap him lightly.
He barely glances behind him. "Hi."
His buddy gives me that you-might-wanna-back-away look, it seems genuine like he might actually feel bad for me.
Deep breath, Lex. "Can we talk?"
"It's alright, man. I'll catch up with you later." His friend nods, giving me one last sympathetic look before walking away.
With a huff, Derek turns around. "What do you want, Lex?"
His eyes look down at me, narrowing like I've somehow become the enemy. It bugs me. If he wants to be mad at me, fine, but he could at least tell me what the hell for.
"You've been avoiding me all week."
He shrugs and takes a quick sip of his beer. "Maybe."
I cross my arms and arch a brow at him. "Maybe? I've called and texted but got nothing. So either you're avoiding me or your phones broken."
"Maybe my phone's broken." He takes another swig, looking at the rowdy crowd behind me.
I'm not gonna get anywhere like this.
"You know what, never mind. If I wanted to talk to a child I'd hang with the Freshmen. Hit me up if you decide you're man enough to have a civil conversation." I pivot on my heels but quickly freeze, getting caught in Jace's penetrating glare.
He's leaning against the wall in the dining room, while his buddies take shots with a large group of people. Even from this distance, his blue eyes pierce right through me, narrowing as they flick to Derek behind me and then back again. Moving smoothly, he pushes off the wall and starts walking over.
Shit, I need another escape route. The patio door? Upstairs?
"Lexi, wait," Derek lightly grabs my hand. "You're right, we should talk."
Jace stops in his tracks, his gaze traveling down to where Derek's hand is wrapped around mine. His top lip curls in disgust as he nods and walks the other away.
My heart feels like it's pounding in my chest, my pulse thumping all the way to my temples.
That was close.
"Lex, please." Derek's voice calls me back. "I'm sorry. Let's just talk."
Deep breath, nothing happened. Put on your game face, Lexi.
Slowly, I turn back around and cross my arms again; back in the here and now and far away from blue-eyed guys that make it hard to breathe. "So, you're gonna tell me what's going on?"
Derek sighs and hangs his head. "Monday, in the hall, you gave me that crazy kiss."
"And?"
"And," he lifts his head, his previous air of irritation returning. "I got the strong feeling that kiss was for the guy watching us and not for me."
My stomach twists with guilt. I had a feeling that was the issue, and honestly, I can't be upset at him for it. This is my own fault. I can blame it on Jace till I turn blue in the face but that wouldn't be fair. I did something stupid and that's on me.
This time it's my turn to hang my head. "I'm sorry. I...I didn't mean to make you feel that way, and I shouldn't have done that."
"Then why did you?"
"Because..." I take a deep breath. "Because I was angry... and I wanted some kind of revenge."
Like pissing him off by shoving my tongue down someone else's throat.
"Against that guy?"
I nod and look up into Derek's eyes.
He bites his lip and looks away. "Who is he?"
"My ex, Jace."
Derek's gaze jerks back to me and narrows.
Placing a hand up to pause his next words, I continue. "From years ago. Way before me and you."
I never talked about Jace, and Derek had never met him. Jace moved away and a few months later Derek moved to town. All Derek knew was that I wasn't a virgin, but nothing more. As far as he knew, my first time could've been with a random guy at a party or a trusted friend. Hell, he could've suspected Caleb. God knows those two don't exactly get along.
He takes a calming breath as different emotions dance in his eyes; anger, relief, and finally, understanding.
"He hurt you."
It's not a question but I nod anyways.
"And what? You were throwing me and you in his face to get back at him?" His face starts to relax, a hopeful smile tipping the corners of his mouth.
All I know is I wanted to piss him off. I never dove deeper as to why I wanted to piss him off beside the obvious, that he had hurt me.
Is that why I did it?
It sounds right. Throwing Derek in Jace's face was like telling him that he didn't break me. That after two years I'm able to move on. Derek makes me happy and we have fun together. That's moving on...which I have...I've moved on.
...have I?
Biting down hard on my lip, I nod my head repeatedly. To Derek's question or my own, I'm not sure. Both, maybe.
"Alright," his smile stretches wide. "I can live with that." Derek throws an arm over my shoulder and tucks me into his side. "Just next time you wanna show me off, at least give me a heads up."
I nod and weakly smile.
"Shit, I've been in my head all week. I thought you had moved on to one of those West County thugs." He laughs. "Should've known you got better taste than that."
Yeah, I got great taste in guys. Can't you tell?
"Let's get a drink." He leads the way while I look over my shoulder for...no reason.
Sure, no reason at all.
Awesome, self-doubt came to the party.
"Then we can hit the dance floor if you want," Derek continues and squeezes my shoulder. "Sound good?"
"Yeah." Sounds like a blast. "Sounds good!"
For a while, I don't see Jace or his friends. The absence of his presence relaxes me, making it easier to let loose and have fun. The drinks help too. Derek and I dance for a while. Eventually, a few of his buddies convince him to play beer pong and I agree to cheer him on. Marcel and Caleb even return and join in on the game while Ava's still lost somewhere in the booze and smoke-filled party haze.
After the second game of pong and several fruity concoctions, I'm ready for a bathroom break.
"Hey," I tap Derek on the shoulder, my voice sounding way too loud. "I need to pee!"
He nods. "Okay, go ahead."
I pout, really wishing he would've offered to walk me. This place is huge and with this many people here, I feel like I'm gonna get swallowed up like Ava. One second I'm here and the next second I'm gone. Never to be seen again! It'll be all over the news.
The girl who vanished!
Okay, so tipsy Lexi might be a bit dramatic, but still. He could've offered.
Reluctantly, I set on a search for a bathroom. I find two downstairs and each one with a line of at least ten people.
My bladder screams at me, "this is an emergency, woman!"
I find the stairs and start climbing two at a time until I reach the second floor. A few people mill around up here but not nearly as many as what's downstairs. I check a couple doors but only find bedrooms and none with their own bathroom.
What the hell, I thought rich people had a bathroom for every bedroom?
On the fifth door, I walk into what has to be the master suite. Cute wall decals that read "Mr. & Mrs." hang on the beige wall above the California king bed.
The parents' room, nice. The master always has its own bathroom.
Everything from the picture frames on the dressers to the beige and brown bedding is in perfect place, undisturbed by the party shaking the rest of the house. Which can only mean one thing, the bathroom must be untouched too.
I dart for the closed door on the other side of the room and turn the knob.
Locked, damn it!
Against my better judgment, I knock on the door. "Is someone in there?"
No, Lex, the door is shut for no fucking reason.
I raise my hand to knock again when the door swings open and my gaze connects with ocean blue eyes.
"Alexis?" Jace looks at me with a confused look on his face that makes me giggle. "What the hell?"
"No time to talk, I need to pee!" I shove him out of the room, still giggling, and slam the door behind me.
Once I finish emptying my bladder, I wash my hands and walk out of the bathroom feeling much better.
Note to self, take more bathroom breaks at the next party.
"You good?"
"Eep!" I jump at the deep voice I was most definitely not expecting.
Whipping around, I spot Jace leaning against a long oak dresser. His body casually propped up with his arms crossed over his chest, but the look in his eyes is far from casual.
He tips his head to the side, like a predator scoping out its prey. That movement alone makes me back away, the hair on the back of my neck standing straight up.
"What are you doing here?" I ask too quickly.
He should've gone back downstairs!
Jace narrows his eyes. "You may have kicked me out of the bathroom, sweetheart, but technically, I was here first."
I bounce my head back and forth like I'm mentally weighing that thought. "Yeeaah, but you could've just gone downstairs. You're big enough to push through a line of people waiting for the bathroom. I'm not. I needed this one more than you."
He smirks. "Lexi, you been checking me out or something?"
"Really? That's what you got from that?"
He shrugs. "You said I was big."
My face heats up and I know without a doubt my cheeks are turning pink.
What the hell is wrong with me? That's not what he meant!
But I know he can tell I'm blushing just from the smirk twisting his full lips. I'd be irritated if I wasn't so damn humiliated. Well, and if I wasn't already a few sheets to the wind.
"You alright, Alexis?" His voice deepens to a husky tone that makes my stomach flip.
This isn't good. Tipsy Lexi should not be anywhere near him.
"Yup." I nod vigorously, making myself dizzy, and stumble back a little. "Just peachy."
Jace's smile slips away and this time when he narrows his eyes at me, he looks almost...concerned. "How much did you have to drink?"
Was it three? Or four?...Shit, it could've been six!
"Um..." I shake my head and shrug. "I can't remember."
Yeah, let's go with that.
Tight-jawed, he pushes off from the dresser. "And your little boyfriend just let you wander off like this?"
I roll my eyes. "He's not my boyfriend, and no one lets me do anything. I can handle myself, thank you very much."
He raises a challenging brow. "Oh, really?"
"Yup," I answer, popping the P at the end and lifting my head high with confidence.
I don't get why all these guys think I can't be left alone at a damn party. Do I seriously come off as that weak and pathetic?
"So tell me then, Lex, what would you have done if some other asshole was up here waiting for you? You been taking some self-defense class I don't know about?" His tone grows harsh, the wall of calm and collected crumbling away.
"Why would you know anything about me, Jace? You haven't exactly been around the last two years."
"Fuck that right now. I'm being fucking serious, Alexis!" He snaps, making me jump from the quick switch of emotions. "What the hell were you thinking coming up here alone?"
Any fight I have in me vanishes quickly, the rage in his ocean eyes pinning me where I stand. He's dropped all signs of his cocksure attitude revealing a glimpse of the boy I once knew just barely breaking through the service.
Jace always had a temper, angry at the world around him, but he used that and his arrogance to keep others away. Yet when he cared for someone, he cared hard, that combination of wrath and confidence making him a fierce protector.
It's something I had tried to forget until now. Having such a powerful example of that side of him standing right in front of me is hard to ignore.
I nervously chew on the inside of my cheek and shrug. "I needed to pee."
"That's not a good enough reason. You have no idea what could've happened to you. All it takes is being alone in the wrong place at the wrong time." The anger in his eyes shifts to something dark and painful as his voice pleads with me. "You can't just wander off drunk and alone with a house full of horny fuckers tore up on God knows what."
"I..." I'm lost for words. Each attempt dying on the tip of my tongue before I can grasp it.
He shakes his head. "Your boy toy should've done a better fucking job at looking out for you."
"I told you, I'm not his..."
"Lexi," Jace stops me, his face twisting like he's physically in pain. "No one; not him, not Caleb, not anyone should've let you go off alone. Not like this." He grits his teeth. "Not right now."
The tortured strain of his words cuts me like a knife. I don't know why this is so important to him but for some reason it is and its enough to make me drop all my defenses. Deep inside me blooms a need to reassure him, to strip away all his worries. I'd gladly take smug infuriating Jace over tormented and stressed. Anything is better than this.
"Look, I'm fine." I cross the room, shrinking the gap between us. "See?" I ask, turning in a circle so he can tell that there's not a single inch of my body that's been injured.
When I face him again his features are less strained, his jaw slack as his eyes feast on me like a starved man who hasn't seen a woman in years.
The way he watches me is terrifying but...exhilarating. His hungry gaze feeling like a physical caress dancing along my skin, leaving goosebumps in its wake while I try to remember how to breathe.
"All good. No reason to worry." I nod, not entirely sure if I'm talking to him or myself.
Keeping his eyes glued to me, Jace strides forward, stopping just short of pressing his body against mine. His breath fans my face, smelling of beer and mint. For as odd as that sounds I swear it's intoxicating right now. I could get drunk off of it and be happy as a clam.
"Promise me, Alexis," he reaches up and gently runs the back of his hand along the side of my face. "Promise you'll be more careful."
That's not so easy to do when the most dangerous thing for my health is sending waves of flutters through my stomach with a simple touch. Without thinking, I press against his hand, wanting to feel more.
Jace's other hand lands on my waist, lightly pulling me flush against him. My hands rest on his chest, splayed wide, feeling the rise and fall of his jagged breaths.
Leaning down, he pauses before taking a deep breath and runs the tip of his nose along my jaw tracing to my ear, and gravelly whispers, "Please, Lexi."
My hands fist the soft cotton material of his black t-shirt as I swallow hard and nod. "I promise."
I'm a goner.
Painfully slow, Jace's lips barely graze over the skin just below my ear sending a shudder through every muscle in my fucking body. I feel his lips tug into a smirk against my skin, clearly pleased with my reaction.
"Lex..."
A scream rings from downstairs, cutting him off.
"What the hell was that?" I snap out my trance, my head whipping around to the closed door behind me as I step away.
Not entirely thinking straight at the moment, I walk over to the door and start to open it. Jace is quickly behind me, reaching above my head to press the door shut.
"Lexi, I need you to wait here. Okay?" His seductive voice is gone, changed out for something closer to concern.
I stare up at him in complete silence, stunned as more shouts fill the house.
"Okay, Alexis?!"
Snapping out of it, I nod. "Yeah. Okay."
💋____________________________________💋
OMG, I really enjoyed writing this chapter. I hope you all enjoyed reading it! So far, it's the longest chapter but I really try to catch as much of Lexi's thoughts and feelings as possible. Hopefully, the quality makes up for the long word count.
What do you think? Did you like meeting Lexi's mom? Do you think Caleb really wanted to leave Lexi? What do you think about her relationship with Derek? And what about that fire between Lexi and Jace? Do you think it was too much too soon, or could that just be because of the alcohol and the situation?
Let me know what you think in the comments and if you enjoyed the read, tap that star button! As usual, I'll post a teaser for chapter 8 before it goes live here, so keep an eye out for that on my Instagram!