I woke up the next morning still feeling that calm buzzing I left Athena's house with.
I spent most of my morning trying to decipher what the feeling was. My heart was full for the first time in a long time. Is that the after-effects of having an orgasm? Or is it something else?
I was unbothered and in my own world for the entire morning. Usually, I'm thinking hard about something that causes unnecessary anxiety and stress. This morning was different and I was appreciative of it.
Once I pulled into school I parked in my usual parking space.
I got out and walked to the front of the school entrance, where Tommy usually waits for me. Except today he was eagerly engaged in conversation with a pretty blonde girl that was a little shorter than him.
He has on jeans and a burgundy crewneck. He recently trimmed his hair, making his curls look tighter and more springy.
I decided to wait a good distance away. He was obviously into the girl and with his new formed body and confidence, I know this will do him well.
Eventually, they parted and Tommy ran over to me, a goody grin on his face.
He grabbed my shoulders, "Do you know how long I've tried to talk to that girl but never had the balls!?"
I laughed, "Even with a big penis?"
"Even with a big penis!" He shouted. I shook my head, not really caring who heard us.
"You get her number?" I asked as we started walking toward the large front doors.
"No, not yet. I mean, we have the same classes. There's still time," He said confidently.
"Ah, the slow burn, huh?"
He shrugged, "Slow burn is the best burn."
I agreed, my mind drifting to Athena, "It is."
As our conversation drifted off to something else, Tommy and I quickly noticed people were now running into school. In fact, it was chaos that erupted in a matter of seconds.
Tommy and I ran inside too, trying to see what was the commotion. I was afraid someone got hurt or something until I laid my eyes on the numerous fights breaking out throughout the main halls.
"Holy fuck!" Tommy shouted. His voice was almost lost with screams and chants of other students.
There were multiple phones recording everything from every angle. Some people were even jumping into these fights randomly. My eyes jumped back and forth, trying to find a safe way out, but every direction was slammed with people.
Tommy grabbed onto my arm, his face flushed with panic. He looked like a deer caught in headlights. We were surrounded by too many different faces and bodies, becoming enclosed in a crowd.
"Nova! What the fuck is going on!" He shouted in panic.
I was constantly being pushed and bumped. It was all too much for me to keep calm, but instead of lashing out, I decided to grab Tommy by his arm and start shoving people out of the way, dragging him behind me.
We managed to get out of the crowd in one piece. I continued to tug Tommy along down the hall, avoiding the fights and smaller crowds as much as I could.
I cringed, slapping my hands over my ears as the fire alarm went off. Tommy pushed me forward, his hands at my back as we quickly scurried down the rest of the hall.
I felt like I was in the middle of a horror movie. The shouting, screaming — the alarm echoing throughout what felt like the entire school. Tommy and I didn't know where to go.
Security came rushing down the hall with handcuffs. I thanked myself for not being involved. I can only imagine those were the fights Ghallgher warned us about and I was the last person that needed to be in that mix.
Tommy and I took refuge in one of the many boy's bathroom. I was just happy it was empty and semi-quiet. The alarm shut off after a few minutes, but you could hear the chaos in the near distance.
Tommy was practically panting, "What the fuck just happened? All of it! What is going on!?"
I shook my head, "I don't know, but that was fucking insane."
He ran his hand through his curls, "Gallagher isn't going to be happy. I don't wanna know how we're all gonna end up suffering."
"I don't think we'll all be dragged into this. Whoever got caught by security — they're fucked," I assured him. "Don't worry."
"This school is going to shit."
I sighed, "It's been shit."
He shook his head, "To think he just brought this up not too long ago ..."
"It was coming. One way or another."
We waited for the bell to ring so we could leave the bathroom and head to class.
We went our separate ways, breaking off with a warning to each other. I'm sure we'll be hearing about this in no time over the speakers. The panic in my chest faded as I clung to the warming thought of Athena.
When the morning officially started, no one could shut up about what happened, as expected. Two of my teachers were questioning us, trying to figure out what caused the sudden eruption. I've heard several different stories and possible reasons. And all of it is familiar.
After a while I blocked it out, reminiscing Athena's touch. The fire I felt traveling through my body. Her sweet words in my ear, her voice so close and soft like music. It was strange ... feeling comfortable while everyone was frantic and gossiping. I felt like I was on the inside looking out.
I felt like I was standing still while everyone was running. And for the first time ever, I was happy with that.
I began thinking about what our conversation was going to be today. Not too long ago I couldn't stand our conversations. It always felt like she was prying. Trying to get answers for her own personal gains.
I like to think she's proved me wrong, even if she is also ... still ... my teacher.
Who would've thought I'd end up having feelings with another girl — woman — in high school.
I mean I really tried to avoid that.
Tommy and I met up by his locker, preparing ourselves for our favorite class of the day.
"Anyone talking about this morning in your classes?" He asked quietly.
"Yeah. Didn't learn anything these past three hours. Everyone is just talking about what happened," I answered while checking our surroundings.
"Fucking stupid," He mumbled. "Let's go."
We walked to the classroom. Athena was already inside, her back turned to us for a few moments. Her hair was in a ponytail and she turned around as soon as Tommy greeted her.
"Morning Ms. Frost," He said as he walked past me.
"Good morning Tommy," She said absently mindedly as her eyes shot to me.
I winked at her. Her long white cardigan hanging past her hips. Her faded light blue jeans coming to cut just above the straps of her heels. She has a bad habit of taking my breath away every time I see her.
She rolled her eyes with a smirk and turned away.
✸✸✸
"I'm very surprised about how calm you are with all this happening today," Athena said as she sighed woefully.
"You should be happy I didn't have an overload," I countered. "Trust me it was like we were thrown into the hunger games. Didn't even get to showcase what I'm capable of."
She chuckled and quickly stopped herself, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to laugh,"
I smiled, "I was being funny on purpose so I don't blame you. Any word about Gallagher and all of this?"
"Surprisingly, no. But I know it's coming."
She was right. Maybe it's not the most secretive thing, but I could feel it riding up my spine that this was going to have an extremely negative effect on the school.
I switched the subject, "Last night was great. Thank you."
Her eyes lit up, "Yes, of course. I'm glad you enjoyed yourself."
"It was, uh ... different."
"How so?" She leaned back in her chair and crossed her legs.
"It's ... been a long time. Since someone's touched me," I lied.
"Do you like being touched?"
I open my mouth to respond but nothing came out. I didn't know how to answer that question. I mean, I liked it when Athena was touching me and I think that's what matters the most.
"Um ... I ... don't know," I said quietly. "I mean, I liked when you were doing it."
She gave me a small smile, "That's good then. Nova, it's okay if you don't know."
I look down at my hands, my fingers fidgeting on my legs. I felt shy. I may as well be a virgin.
"Nova," She called.
I cleared my throat and looked up at her. It's so much easier for me to just give than receive.
"Do you feel ... intimidated? By me?" She asked.
Do I tell the truth or do I lie? "Um ... no ... I mean, yes, but no? Fuck."
"It's — It's okay if you are. I understand, really. I'm just asking because I noticed you were pretty tense last night."
I deflated inside, "Yeah, um ... I'm not used to — my
ex-girlfriend didn't touch me. So ..."
"O-Oh," Her voice dropped a few octaves. Is she surprised? "That ... makes more sense now."
"Does it?" I repeatedly quietly.
"It does. I'm sorry if I—"
"You didn't do anything wrong. In fact, you did everything right. I just ... I don't know much about what it is that I like. I guess. I sound so stupid."
"No, no you sound honest. Really, it's okay if you don't know. Sex is ... complicated. You may like only one thing or many things. The only way to really find out is to try, you know? Try with someone you trust."
I bit my lip, a little too hard, "I trust you ..."
She didn't say anything, at least not right away. I'm not sure what exactly I wanted her to say. But I'm not lying when I say I trust her.
A few months ago I would've kicked myself in the ass for even thinking I could trust a teacher.
"I know you trust me," She said finally. "That's why I move slow with you."
"Yeah ... figures," I shrugged. "I appreciate it. Really."
She hummed softly, "I bet."
I smirked, "How's your day been?"
"It's been strange because of all of this. These fights feel so absent-minded, you know. Like really what is going on?"
I shook my head, asking the same questions in my head, "Back when I used to fight, it was never like ... this. It was very straightforward. Everyone followed the rules. No more, no less. We were terrified of fighting in school and getting suspended. This ... this is other shit. Has to be."
"How were the fights even coordinated anyway? You just ... met up at places?"
"Yup. Nailed it. You're pretty smart," I smirked.
She rolled her beautiful eyes, "Don't start with the teacher jokes."
I laughed quietly. My heart felt like it was gradually getting larger in my chest because I was happy. I was happy to be in front of Athena ... being given all of her precious attention. I was happy not to be in the mix of all the crazy shit that happened this morning. I was happy that my circumstances are a bit different this time around.
"What are you thinking about?" She asked, breaking my train of thought.
"Um ... I don't know, to be honest. Just thinking about you. Among other things."
I could tell she was fighting a smile. What girl doesn't like to hear that someone is thinking about them?
"I guess I'll pick your brain later then, if it really is about me, of course."
"Oh ... we can't talk about it here? How come?" I asked teasingly.
She stared me straight in the eyes and clearly accepted my challenge. She slowly got up from her chair and walked around her desk. Her legs crossing over the other with so much precision as her heels clicked against the tile floor.
I tried not to show it, but my body was heating up and it felt like I was starting to melt right in my seat. Her hand slid across me, shoulder to shoulder. then I felt her lips at my ear and I clenched my legs.
She whispered, "Because I can't get my hands on you here."
Goosebumps broke out on my skin. My vagina throbbed with want. My body throbbed with want. God, she won again.
"Plus, it'll be hard to pry those strong hands off my body once they're on me."
I exhaled slowly, clenching my fists for a split second. God, she's so right. Her hand stretched over my left shoulder and skimmed my own. I almost did something stupid like groan her name. The sexual tension was through the roof. I wouldn't be surprised if everyone on campus could feel it.
"So the better place to get my hands on you ... would be at home. I mean ... if you're not too ... scared."
I rolled my eyes, "I'm not scared."
She hummed, "Guess we'll see."
She left my side and I felt like I could breathe again. I sighed softly, inhaling my first breath. She really knows how to throw me into a heat.
The bell rang. Disappointment met with my happier emotions, but I knew I'd be seeing her tonight to finish what she started. That made me happy, to say the least.
I quickly got my things together. I would hate to run into Tommy again. Any more of those run-ins and things are going to get really obvious really fast. That or he's going to start questioning me even more. And there's nothing more annoying than being questioned.
Athena sat back down in her seat, "Dinner tonight?"
I grab the strap of my messenger bag and adjust it, "Wouldn't miss it for the world."
She smirked. I shot her a crooked smile and left the room.