Sooooooo we're gonna pretend Louis's birthday and Christmas hasn't happen. I'm sorry for the shitty updates. Just I've been busy and now I have the flu. So yeah sucks
Enjoy!💙
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B a r b a r a
I'm fucking done with boys. They're all freakin jerks and assholes.
You think so highly of someone and they go and slap you in the face for it. All guys are jerks and I'm just gonna start facing the facts that I'll never find anyone who's decent.
I would have bet a thousand dollars that Liam was truly a great guy. Once again I'm screwed over in the guy department.
I'm an attractive girl with a great personality. Sure I can be a bitch sometimes but only to people who deserve it. I wasn't even rude to Liam or anything. I was probably nicer to him than I've been to anyone in awhile. That's the last time I do that.
I, Barbara Renee Leal swear off any and every guy who try's hitting on me. It's just going to be about me.
No guy is worth crying over. I've done all my crying back in high school. I'm grown and shouldn't be crying over guys.
I was in the middle of trying to stop my crying when I heard my door knob jiggle. I knew it was only one person and I quickly used the sleeves of my sweater the wipe my tears and my leaking nostrils.
"Barbara..." he softly asks through a crack of the door.
"What?" I snapped. Hopping he couldn't tell I was just crying.
"I.....uhh. I was just...i think.." he stumbled upon his words.
"Just freakin spit it out, louis." I rolled my eyes.
"I thought I heard....umm crying....and I know we aren't close so this may be weird but I didn't want to just ignore it. Are you okay? Do I need to kick Liam's ass, because I'd be willing to do that." He opens the door a little more.
I stared down at my blanket, not wanting to look at him. I hate crying and I hate feeling like this. It's really nice of him to be concerned I'm not just use to this. My parents would hear me cry all the time back in high school, and never do or say anything.
"I'm done with guys." I sighed and shook my head.
"What happen tonight...." He cautiously takes a step inside my room.
"Its stupid." I threw my head back on my bed frame.
"Tell me." He comes closer and sits at the edge of my bed by my feet.
"Well we were having a great night at the restaurant. Just laughing and enjoying the night. Then he sees some girl he use to know and said he was just gonna say a quick hi and come right back." I took a deep breath and looked at his face to see if he was really paying attention. He was staring right at me waiting for me to continue.
"Well after about 20 minutes he still hasn't come back, he was still over there talking. He even fucking glances over at me and quickly looked away, and after he whispered something to her they both left the fucking restaurant. He didn't even say anything to me, he just left." I looked down my lap.
"And I guess after that that's when you went and got drunk?." He asks
"Yup." I know it's kind of pathetic to do that but I was just caught in the moment.
"I can't believe he had the fucking nerve to, first, leave to go talk to another girl, and then get up and leave after looking at you. I swear I'm going to kick his fucking ass." He seethed.
"He's not worth it." I shake my head "and he's not even worth my tears it's just...i thought he was a really sweet guy. I just can't believe he did that to me."
"It's his loss." He replies.
"Yeah....Well that's why I'm acting like a fucking teenager."
"I'm really sorry Barbara, I knew you actually liked him." He uncomfortably says that last statement.
"Yeah.. well I'm tired and should go to bed." I yawn actually feeling really drained.
"Yeah of course." He stand up. "Goodnight." he said before leaving my room.
"Thanks for checking on me." I lowly say before he shut the door.
"Anytime." he gives me a small smile and shuts the door.
I went to bed feeling much better than I did earlier that night and I'm scared to say it was because of Louis.
*****
For some weird reason I wake up before the sun completely rises. I try falling back to sleep but my killer headache is preventing that. I almost forgot about last nights events. I really wish I did.
I carefully get out of bed a drag myself to get some medicine in the kitchen. I throw 2 pills down my throat, quickly drinking a whole glass of water after.
I looked out our kitchen window to see snow falling. It was beautiful. It never snowed like that in Texas.
After staring out the window for a few minutes I start making breakfast. Knowing Louis will throw a fit if I don't cook him some so I double everything.
As soon as I shut off the stove Louis comes strolling in. His messy bed hair and shirtless body tells me he literally just rolled out of bed.
"Morning." I greet him.
"Morning." He yawns. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm alright. Hoping my headache goes away." I grab two plates for us and set them on the counter.
"That's good." He grabs the plate and starts serving himself.
"I can't believe it's already Christmas Eve." I started eating my food.
"I know. We have no decorations." He laughs.
"I know it's sad." I laughed with him. "Are you going to visit your family?"
"Yeah I'm leaving tonight." He says with a mouth full of eggs.
"Oh really?" I stare down at my plate.
Great that means I'm gonna be here all by my self. I haven't talked to my parents since I left and I doubt that they want me there. I honestly wouldn't want to go down there anyways and have to sit through the judgment of my family.
"Yeah my mom really wants me to and they're upset I didn't come down earlier so they could celebrate my birthday." He responds.
"When's your birthday?" I asked
"Today." He smiles
"Really?? Oh happy birthday." I tell him. "we'll call this your birthday breakfast."
"Thanks." He laughs. "So are you doing anything for Christmas?"
"Nah. Probably just hangout here and watch movies."
"Not visiting your family?" He asks.
"Don't really feel like it." I shrugged and started putting away all the dirty dishes. "My parents and I don't really get along all that well."
"Oh well that sucks. I'm really sorry."
"It alright. I'll be fine." I leave the kitchen and go to the living room.
"You sure?" He asks
"Yeah it's fine." I shrugged "I'm not really into Christmas."
The older I get the less excited I get about it. I never really got gifts so it was never fun for me. My parents would go out with their friends and get wasted like fucking teenagers.
"I know this is fucking crazy as hell and you'll probably think I'm insane but maybe you'd want to come to my moms house. She's nothing like me and would welcome you. I just would feel really bad leaving you here all by yourself."
"I don't know...wouldn't that be strange. I don't want your family thinking we're like dating or anything."
"They won't. I'll tell them we're roommates and that I just invited you so you wouldn't be alone."
"I don't want to intrude......"
"You won't. I'm leaving at 6 and its a 3 hr flight. You need to make a decision soon."
This is so weird. Spending Christmas with his family and we hardly get along. He probably just feels bad about what happen with Liam.
"So what's it gonna be Barb?"
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So don't kill me because I feel like I'm dying because of the flu!😷😷
Tell me what y'all think. Since I'm trapped in bed until Friday I'll update tomorrow.
Love Ashley! X