Hello, everyone!~♡ I hope you all are having a wonderful day~♡ This chapter is actually longer than normal, but it's to fit in all the information between both couples involved in this chapter.🤣 There is only mention of sexual content and it's very minor.:3 But still, please be advised when reading because who knows when it'll take a turn~♡ Without further ado, please enjoy the 21st chapter!~♡ I really hope you like it~♡
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Jungkook groaned softly as his eyes gradually started to flutter open, his vision still dark. It finally dawned on him that someone else's weight was present on top of his body and he could still hear small whimpers. Realizing Taehyung had been the only person with him, his eyes shot open and he hastily bolted up off the ground. "Tae?! Are you okay?" Jungkook inquired, concern heavily apparent in his voice as he also acknowledged Taehyung's arms and wrists took the severe force of that fall.
Jungkook immediately scooped Taehyung up and positioned him in his lap, taking his hands in his own to inspect his wrists. Jungkook tenderly massaged them between his fingers to detect if there was anything misplaced or poking out. Jungkook could just barely discern Taehyung gritting his teeth in pain, tears slipping past the strands of hair that covered his eyes in an attempt to conceal his suffering. Taehyung sniffled a couple of times, using the back of his hand to wipe his tears as Jungkook gently cupped Taehyung's face in his hands and urged the elder to look him in the eyes. Jungkook used his thumbs to wipe away any stray tears as Taehyung smiled through his pain. "I- I think I just o- overreacted to the pain," Taehyung reflected softly as he giggled at Jungkook's expression.
Jungkook was sincerely worried about Taehyung as Taehyung smiled in endearment. He was just happy that Jungkook cared this much about him, even after everything. Jungkook's eyebrows knit in dismay as he glanced down at one of Taehyung's wrists. One of his wrists was swelling as Jungkook tenderly turned it over in his hand. "We should get you to the nurse to have that looked at," he advised, gently lifting Taehyung from his lap as Jungkook stood to his feet. He continued to hold Taehyung firmly in his arms, bridal style as Taehyung glanced over at Jungkook with his face flushed bright red. "I- it's not that bad, I promise," Taehyung whispered softly, still anxious being held this way by Jungkook.
Jungkook stared into Taehyung's eyes intently, searching for any notion that Taehyung was downplaying the extent of his injury. Taehyung stared back at Jungkook for a moment, too embarrassed to keep his gaze locked on Jungkook's own intense gaze for too long as he wondered when he'd be put back down. "You should have just let me hit my head again," Jungkook whispered softly, shifting closer towards Taehyung. Taehyung froze when he realized Jungkook was moving closer to kiss him, closing his eyes in anticipation. Although, the moment that their lips should have come into contact never arrived and Taehyung peeked out of one of his eyes. He noticed that Jungkook had turned his head away from him now, clearing his throat as Taehyung stared at him with a deep hurt. "Why didn't you kiss me?" Taehyung asked softly as Jungkook fumbled with Taehyung's body. Taehyung moved to stand on his own two feet once again as he stared at Jungkook intently, waiting for an answer. "I wanted you to kiss me and I could tell that you wanted to kiss me too. Is that typically something that 'Friends with Benefits' don't do?" Taehyung asked, marking air quotations around friends with benefits.
This seemed like more than just friends with benefits to him, but he couldn't be sure that Jungkook was on the same page, no matter how hard his heart pleaded. Jungkook swallowed thickly, turning away from Taehyung completely as he tried to think of a believable answer. "Well, you see, I think that depends on the person," Jungkook started, finally turning back towards Taehyung. Jungkook could see the devastation in Taehyung's eyes as he cast them downwards. "I've had many friends that I've benefited from and I had intimate and sexual relationships with just about all of them. Don't ask me the number, I will not answer that. I've never kissed any of them though because I didn't have feelings for them. I'm just not someone who can dedicate my life to one individual..."
Taehyung felt a deep throb of despair within his heart as he forced back tears and encouraged himself to take these words in stride. Jungkook didn't mean them. Jungkook was only saying these words to explain his actions... Taehyung squeezed his eyes shut and inhaled deeply before looking at Jungkook. "O- oh, okay," he replied tightly, trying to prove that these words hadn't hurt him. "Does that mean you'll never have a dedicated relationship? Or that you'll never get married?" Taehyung asked, trying to make it sound more like he was exclusively interested in Jungkook's declaration. Jungkook shrugged lightly as he watched Taehyung's entire demeanor deflate under his nonchalant gaze, which was hurting Jungkook more than he would have liked to admit. "Well, it's not like I never imagined it," Jungkook stated, laughing softly as he tried to remedy the situation and Taehyung's heart. "I just don't imagine it happening until I'm 40 or so... You know, so I can live out my partying years with all the alcohol and sex I want without someone tying me down until I'm good and ready. So that I don't die alone either," Jungkook explained, trailing off as Taehyung's shoulders slumped. Taehyung's head sunk in dismal misery at the realization that he would die alone as tears stung his eyes, a forced smile gracing his lips.
He was used to being a fake perception of happiness around his father. His father was all business, after all, it's not like he could tell Taehyung was depressed and faking happiness. He only pretended around his father though. He wasn't used to being fake towards Jungkook. Taehyung choked back a muffled sound, trying not to sob as Jungkook wrapped his arms around Taehyung tightly. Jungkook felt like shit for telling Taehyung all of this, but he didn't want to limit his opportunities. Although Taehyung had a smile plastered to his face at the moment, Jungkook could suddenly see tears trickling down his cheeks and past the fake plastered smile. "Tae? Is everything alright?" Jungkook asked skeptically as Taehyung buried his face in Jungkook's shirt.
Taehyung's smile instantly crumbled, shaking his head violently into Jungkook's shirt as he sobbed loudly now. Taehyung thought he could have changed Jungkook's mentality on their relationship by sleeping with him whenever he wanted, but those statements were far from ideal. Jungkook sighed softly as he gently patted Taehyung's back, trying to rub soothing circles to calm him. Even if those actions didn't appear to be working all that well.
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Seokjin inhaled sharply as he made his way towards the principal's and the warden's offices. If he wanted to get off campus for the day, he would have to acquire a day pass from both of them in order to get past security. He hated this school with all of his being, but he needed to continue attending in order to get more intimate with Namjoon.
After obtaining his day pass, Seokjin briskly walked passed the security guards and tilted his head towards the sky. It was the first time he could see the sky without also seeing the barbed wire fences that surrounded the school. He smiled as he inhaled deeply once again, the scent of fall hanging in the air while the purples and pinks that blended with orange and soft blue across the horizon filled him with a sense of freedom.
He walked slowly down the sidewalk towards Namjoon's neighborhood, his head tilted towards the sky during the entirety as the chilling autumn breeze caused him to shiver. He continued to smile though, too excited to see Namjoon to care that his arms were cold. His mind focused only on thoughts of Namjoon and the realization that they would be alone in his apartment for the first time.
When Seokjin stepped up to Namjoon's door, his arms were so cold that they were now numb. Even so, that didn't bother him as he knocked on Namjoon's door in excitement. Namjoon quickly answered the door in a pair of loose-fitting shorts and a baggy tee-shirt as Seokjin stood in awe. Namjoon peeked carefully around each corner to ensure Seokjin wasn't followed to his apartment. "Hey, come on in," Namjoon stated as he turned and stepped into his living room. Seokjin followed suit, closing the door behind him as he watched Namjoon flop down on the couch across the living room.
"What did you want to talk about, Jin?" Namjoon asked, patting the spot beside him as Seokjin slowly approached the couch. Seokjin gradually lowered himself onto the couch cushion, trying to be proper since it was his first time being alone with Namjoon in his apartment. Seokjin turned his head towards Namjoon abruptly, sparing no moment of their time together. "How do you feel about me, Joonie?" Seokjin blurted out, staring at Namjoon expectantly as he waited for an answer.
Namjoon blinked a couple of times before clearing his throat, his eyes wavering as he stared back at Seokjin. He didn't know how to answer this loaded question. Especially since he didn't want to hurt Seokjin's feelings, but he also wanted to keep his job. "Don't you think that that's not a question you should be asking a teacher?"
Seokjin clasped Namjoon's hand in both of his own, closing his eyes as he exhaled softly and inhaled deeply. "Pretend for a moment that you're not a teacher right now. Pretend that you are purely Namjoon and I am only Seokjin. Not your former student, not a current student, but the same Seokjin that met you through Eun Jun when he was only eleven years old and you were only sixteen. Then... tell me your answer."
Namjoon stopped for a moment, thinking hard about the day he'd first met Seokjin. He thought about the way Seokjin had looked at him from that very first day, the way his eyes would light up and sparkle when Namjoon would enter the room to pester Eun Jun. He continued to think about the way Seokjin would interact with him, the way Seokjin had always tried to touch his arm or be close to him even though he was Eun Jun's friend. Namjoon didn't want to admit that he knew Jin had always had feelings for him because that would mean that he had blatantly flirted with Jin back when he did have a girlfriend.
Namjoon leaned back into the couch and groaned loudly as he covered his face with his hands. "You've always liked me, haven't you?" he asked, trying to verify Seokjin's answer. Seokjin smiled softly as Namjoon peeked through his fingers to see Seokjin nod and that made him feel tragedy for the girl he was dating then. "You just now realized that?" Seokjin teased, turning to face Namjoon better. One leg propped up on the couch cushions while the other remained flat on the floor. He tucked that leg under the one that remained planted on the ground, his hands resting between his legs as he lifted himself slightly off the couch in his excitement. This meant Namjoon finally recognized how Seokjin felt towards him.
Namjoon glanced over at Seokjin and sighed softly as he turned to face him as well. "So that time you fell asleep on me when we were watching that movie? Where you and I were the only two on the couch and Eun Jun slept on the floor that night. Were you trying to convey your feelings then too?" Seokjin smiled once again, noting that Namjoon forgot to mention one minor fragment but nodded anyway, his gaze resting on Namjoon's lips. He hastily leaned forward before Namjoon could react, his hands cupping Namjoon's face as he kissed him heatedly. Seokjin slowly pulled back from that kiss, his eyes hinting at desperation as he smiled softly. "Just tell me you don't like me so I don't have to keep feeling like this. It's been almost 7 years since we met and I can't keep pining after one person... especially if they don't want me," Seokjin expressed, laughing with self-deprecation.
Namjoon frowned at Seokjin's words and sighed softly before opening his mouth to speak. "You see, I can't do that. I've been lying to myself for far too long and I can't keep hurting you in the process. Back then, I only got engaged to my ex-fiancee because I was trying to run away from my feelings for you," he admitted softly, groaning at his own past actions. "I mean, I was always told that I'd make some lucky lady a very happy wife... So... I thought it was wrong to have feelings for another guy instead... But you see, that day you fell asleep on me when the movie was winding down... I- I did something I'm not proud of while you slept and ended up waking you... Thank god, Eun Jun had already fallen asleep on the floor," he added, hiding his face in embarrassment.
Seokjin's eyes lit up at the comment of that fragment that Namjoon had previously forgotten to mention. "So I wasn't dreaming that?! I really did help you masturbate that night? I could have sworn it was my imagination or a wet dream because you acted so nonchalant the next day! I- I thought it was just my desire to be with you overwhelming my dreams," Seokjin stated, his voice growing increasingly louder in excitement with each word. Namjoon hastily covered Seokjin's mouth, his face red with embarrassment as he slowly withdrew his hands. "Yes, I did that with you right there and yes, you helped me... Please can we stop talking about that night now?" Namjoon asked, his embarrassment reaching past his face and towards his ears as they turned red too.
Seokjin smiled softly and nodded as he scooted closer to Namjoon on the couch. Resting his elbow on the back of the couch as he rested his head in his hand, his gaze fixated on Namjoon's face. "So you got engaged to your ex-girlfriend a few weeks after that night because you couldn't face me after that?" Seokjin asked, resting his free hand on Namjoon's knee.
Namjoon sighed softly, his eyes glancing over towards Seokjin to meet his gaze as he nodded meekly. "Yes... I ran away from you... She didn't know anything about it. She didn't care to ask why we were getting engaged so suddenly either. She just wanted someone to help her take care of the unborn baby she was carrying at the time," he admitted softly and Seokjin's smile dropped instantly. "It wasn't mine, Jin," Namjoon explained, calmly before continuing. "She'd been with another guy while on vacation for spring break, even though we were already dating then. She didn't bother to tell me any of that until after I broke off the engagement. She thought it would hurt me," he scoffed, glancing up at Seokjin to see him smiling once again.
Seokjin tried to cover his mouth as he giggled at Namjoon's story, leaning forward once more. "Does that mean you're done running from me?" he asked softly, Namjoon leaning closer to Seokjin as well. "Yes, I'm done running from you and my feelings," he answered tenderly as he pressed his lips to Seokjin's own. Seokjin's hand moved from resting on Namjoon's knee to gripping the front of Namjoon's shirt to try and pull him as close as possible.