The Worst Drug

•Family Dinner•

{•Unedited•}
~Vina's POV~

As much as I enjoyed the get away with Idris and being alone, I want to get back home and see the kids. Within the matter of a few short months I've developed motherly instincts over both Ez and Cass, and now with the hormones controlling my emotions it makes me a little sad to be away from them. I surprised the other night when Idris was on the phone with Ez and she asked to talk to me. Our communication with Cass has mostly been through Val since whenever we've suggested calling Cass is doing something but I doubt that's the case, although, I don't know what the actual reasoning can be.
"Can you clip it for me?" I ask Idris, turning around so the clasp of my bra is facing him. The sound of his boots scuff against the wooden floor is the only noise in the room other than the air coming down from the vent. He clasps it tightly and turns me towards him. Taking a step back, the corner of his mouth curves upward into a suggestive smirk.
"Stand against that wall," he tells me, pointing against the wall beside the window. I shift back and forth with my hands behind my back, looking down at myself in confusion. I still need to finish getting dressed, only in black bra and panties with sheer black tights to go under my dress since there's a small breeze today.  
    He grabs my bag that's on the floor and fishes for the small makeup bag. I didn't bring much, most of what I have in there is useless. I didn't feel well enough to get myself ready most days during this trip sadly. Still though, Idris and I had a good time. He whips out the red lipstick I have but never use; I keep it in there for my mom when we're out places.
    "How do I put this on your stomach?" He asks.
   "Why would you do that?" I ask, completely baffled by the foolish idea. He's never the brightest crayon in the box, but what?
     "To take pictures of you. I want pictures of you when you're pregnant...like maternity photos but not professional...at all," he says. "So how? Like kisses." I grab the lipstick from his hand and take off the cap. Twisting it up, I take a step closer to him and stand on my tiptoes, although, it's still not enough.
    "Bend down," I tell him. He does as told without question to my height. His green eyes widen in surprised as the creamy lipstick smears over his bottom lip. He tries jerking away from I grab his shoulder. "This is how! I can't kiss my own stomach."
    "I don't want fucking lipstick on!" He explains, trying to wipe his mouth but I block his hand.
    "You're the one who said you wanted pictures! Now man up and put the lipstick on!" I scold him. Clenching his jaw, he grumbles as he lets me continue to neatly apply the lipstick to his lips. I can't help but giggle at the sight of him with makeup. He would make a pretty girl, the bright red compliments his bright eyes and tan skin. "Now kiss my stomach."
     "I can't believe I'm wearing lipstick right now. This I can imagine from your dad, after a few beers and too many episodes of RuPaul's Drag Race, but not me," he complains, kneeling down in front of me. Placing his hands on my hips he starts placing red kisses all over my tummy. Afterwards, he wastes no time aggressively wiping his mouth off with his arm, the red pigment smearing over the black ink of his tattoos.
He grabs my hands and places them on my stomach. Taking a step back he takes his phone out and sits on the bed. I look around awkwardly, feeling uncomfortable being taken pictures of. Glancing down, my fingers caress my lower abdomen. The ends of my black hair stop at the top of my growing stomach. He instructs me to pop my hip out a little which makes me laugh, finding it funny how serious he's taking this.
     "You're so gorgeous," he says, glancing up at me with a grin. My face heats up even more and I start towards him, picking his arm up from his lap and sitting myself on his thigh. Throwing my arm behind his broad shoulders my fingers trace the outline of the eagle wing in his right shoulder blade. Looking at his phone he goes to his gallery and swipes through the pictures he took. As uncomfortable as I felt, they came out looking otherwise. He got a picture at the perfect moment when I flipped my hair to the side and my knee is popped out a tad, overlapping my left leg.

(Photo credit goes to Inanna and her man)
The bright red kiss marks on my stomach bring out the dark golden color of my skin. The black lacey bra I have sits my breasts up on my growing stomach. The black matching panties don't show underneath the tights, only making the material look darker to keep what's important hidden. I can't help but smile at myself in the picture. Never have I seen myself as I am right now; I know I'm not ugly but right here I can't help but see beauty. And that's because now I am carrying a child and know this is the reason I'm here.
     "You should take up photography," I joke. He rolls his eyes and kisses my cheek.
    "Photographer by day, torturer by night," he adds with a chuckle. Standing up, his hand slowly falls from my waist, his hand brushing over my butt. Laying back, he places his hands over his face. "Have you talked to Serene or Val?"
   "I talked to Manny, they took Ez to the beach so they should be back by the time we get there. Val said he wants to keep Cass for himself," he says. My eyes widen and I snap around horror. Heck no!
   "He's not going anywhere. He's staying with us," I tell him. He pushes himself up on his forearms, hair falling in front of his eyes. He needs a haircut. "No ones taking him."
    "You're right, no one is. He was joking, baby," he tells me. I sigh in relief but my face heats up with embarrassment that I didn't get it. "Cass wanted to talk to you last night to say goodnight but you were asleep and I didn't want to wake you up after you hadn't been feeling good."
    My heart warms hearing he asked to talk to me. I love that boy as if he's my own. "I'm happy we get to be back with them."
    "Wow, are you tired of me already?"
    "No, I can't get tired of you...we're married, and I love you," I say. He winks at me, the corner of his mouth curving upwards into a cheeky grin. "But I miss the kids. I like being around them too, as a family."
    "So do I, baby," he says. Getting up he grabs the hat he had thrown on one of the pillows and flips his hair back before putting it on. I practically start salivating at the sight. When he wears a hat, between my legs could be considered a pool...or a slip and slide that he can slide his...WHOAH THERE CORVINA!
His goes off on the bed. When he picks it up his brows furrow in what I take as confusion until I notice the way his jaw clenches and notice it's anger. Pressing his lips together he straight ahead at nothing, a blank look on his face. Placing my hand on his arm he snaps his eyes down to me briefly before tossing his phone down with a scuff. My hand slips from his arm as he steps away, his hands on his hips as he hangs his head, looking at the ground deep in thought.
Sitting down I pick up his phone to see the two messages. No one is at the top, just a phone number with a area code I don't recognize.
Hi, Idris, it's Arden. Your mother. I understand after the last time we spoke if you choose to ignore this message. I got your number through your file and wanted to talk to you in a less professional setting. I came off the wrong way; I was in shock. You look so much like your father, I- 
     I stop reading there, setting it on my lap. He spins around with a loud sigh. Folding my hands on my thighs my fingers fiddle together anxiously. I don't like not knowing what's going on in his head; I want to help him but he isn't the type to want help in this kind of situation.
    "Did you read it all?" He asks. My brows raise in surprise. I hadn't thought he seen me reading it or would want to. Usually, this kind of stuff he keeps away from me, although, I wish he didn't. I shake my head, picking his phone up and trying to hand it back to him. He shakes his head, crossing his tattooed arms over his chest. The front of his shirt wrinkles from the pressure of his arms, the front pulling down just a little, showing more of the tattoo he has across the top of his chest. "Read it."
    Sighing, I look back down and start reading from the beginning.
Hi, Idris, it's Arden. Your mother. I understand after the last time we spoke if you choose to ignore this message. I got your number through your file and wanted to talk to you in a less professional setting. I came off the wrong way; I was in shock. You look so much like your father, that I didn't know how to react because it made me feel like a scared little girl again. It was immature and I apologize although I know for you that won't mean anything to make up for what he and I put you through.
    I don't want to say everything over a text message, there's too much to say. I would love it if you would come to dinner with Jason, my husband, and I. It's completely understandable if you choose to not come, or even just ignore this message, but I want to try and make amends. Although I hurt you from a young age I want to try and fix it even if it is too late and I would appreciate if you gave me the chance. I hope to hear back from you soon.
His eyes meet mine for a second when I look up at him after finishing reading the text. She was more respectful than I was expecting. His arms fall to his sides.
"I'm sor-"
"Don't say your sorry. I don't want pity," he says harshly. My mouth clamps shut, shoulders slumping as I let out a sigh through my nose. I just don't know what else to say...Shaking his head, he runs his hands over his face. "I'm sorry; I'm sorry, I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. I just don't know what to do."
"Who's Jason?" I ask, looking at the message again.
"I don't know; hell, I just found out for sure her name is Arden when I went to that appointment. I wasn't sure if it was Arden or Malaria my entire life." Standing up I hand him the phone back and walk to the window. "It says he's her husband." 
     I know I don't use this word often and don't like profanity, but what a bitch! Invite him for dinner, but one on one. Throwing her husband into the mix will make him on edge. I remind myself before letting myself get to angry that she doesn't know his personality. However, if she met him that one time and told him he's like his father, she could have gotten the impression he wouldn't be happy about it.
    "What do you want to do?" I ask, leaning against the wall with my hands behind my back. He takes the hat off and runs his fingers through his hair. Staring wide eyed at the floor he lets out a loud sigh. Clearing my throat, I take long strides over. My arms wrap around his waist, my body pressing gently against his.
   "What would you do?"
    "I want you to treat her like you would someone you have to torture but that's not appropriate." To my surprise he chuckles, giving me a small smile that I know might have been forced but it was still nice to see. His hands run up my arms. "I don't know what I would do. This has to be all your decision anyways."
    "I don't like making decisions."
   "Since when?" I ask, my arms falling. He quickly grabs my hands and returns them back to their previous position. "I don't want to see you tear yourself down about this."
    "It's just...hasn't it been too long to fix things now? I don't see the point in even trying with her," he says.
   "Then don't go."
   "But I also want to know what she has to say."
   "Then go."
   "You're really no help sometimes."
    ••••••

~Idris's POV~

Cleaning up in the barn, I'm careful when stepping around to not slip. Knowing that tonight is the dinner with my mom and her husband, I got a little too aggressive with my victim today that Val brought in. All the man did was steal two shipments of coke, he didn't deserve to totally get gutted apart. The entire floor by the entire was puddled with his blood so I had to hose it down. Thankfully, the vigorous breeze today coming in through the cracks of the door have brought in all the smells of the flowers and grass, washing out the horrid smell of blood and intestines.
After thinking about it, I decided to text my mother back telling her I'd come. There isn't anyway in hell I'm going alone though. It took some convincing (and by convincing I mean sex) to get Vina to agree to come with me. I know she doesn't like going out to crowded restaurants but I can't go through this dinner alone and I'll do whatever I can to make sure she's okay.
This morning I was in a fine mood until Vina suddenly stopped answering her text messages when she got to her doctors appointment. Three days ago she went to get retested and today she gets the results. I wanted to go with her since she mentioned being nervous but was gone before I woke up, leaving me with a note on the counter saying she didn't want to wake me up...I would have rather been woken up than had a panic attack searching around for my wife for ten minutes before seeing the note.
Bending down I pick up the pile of heavy chains that are still bloody. The sound of the metal clashing makes me cringe. My phone goes off in my pocket and I take it out, hoping to see Vina's name with a response finally but it's Enzo's. Rolling my eyes in annoyance I turn it off and toss it onto my jacket that's thrown next to the pillar.
      Looking down at the chains my brows pull together. What was I doing again? I glance around, stopping the bucket against the right wall I have filled with rags. Forgetting about the chains I start walking over to get it. A crack in the concrete makes me trip and stop in my tracks. Bending down I look at the large chunk of concrete that has somehow been knocked out. I need to fix that before I end up falling while I'm in here with a victim.
    Straightening up I dust my hands off on my pants, grey dust smearing on the side of my thigh. What the heck was I doing again? Pressing my lips together I let out an aggravated sigh, annoyed with myself.
The last two weeks I've been getting on my own fucking nerves. For some reason my ADHD has been through the damn roof since the day Vina and I left the beach house. The only explanation I can come up with is that it's probably stress. The worry over Vina's well being and our baby has put me in a constant state of anxiety.
    The thick lump in my throat goes down hard as I swallow, stopping and taking a minute to breathe. My hands shake at my sides, my fingers wiggling back and forth. It honestly hasn't been this bad since I was in prison and they refused to give me medication. What I did to manage it before was drugs, and I'd straight fucking lying if I said the thought of using within the last two days. Every time I lose track of thought or can't sleep, vivid flashbacks of sniffing or injecting that shit pops in my head because I know it would get rid it all. In one way it would make things easier, but then so much harder in another and it's risking too much.
It sucks because I'm happy with my life. I have a beautiful, wonderful wife who's just going through a lot and already two amazing kids. Yeah, at this point I'm claiming that asshole that I practically kidnapped; he's my son. I won't dare tell Vina about my recent train of thought because I won't hurt her like that. If she hears I've thought of using...I don't want to even imagine the scenario.
I rub my hands over my face, breathing out through my nose. My fingers tug my hair back, a loud groan of annoyance leaving me. I'll just go home and relax; this is just a spurt. Digging my hand into my pocket I fish around for my keys on the way to the door. Finding nothing, I reach into the other but again there's nothing. It hits me that I set my key's somewhere...but where. Oh fuck.  
     Now where the hell did I put my keys?
    For the next ten minutes I'm rummaging through the entire barn trying to find them. You'd think with how much technology there is these days that they'd come up with some "Find my car keys" shit like they do for cellphones.
     Sunlight starts pouring in from the direction of the door. Val's shoes scuff against the floor, his brown hair blowing to the side to which he aggressively pushes away from his eyes. For as long as I've known him he's had longer hair, I wonder what he would look like if it was short. I've heard Mel try to convince him a few times but he just rolls his eyes and says something in Italian under his breath so she can't hear him.
     "Cosa stai facendo qui? *What are you still doing here?*" He asks, pushing his sleeves down. Removing his suit jacket he starts unbuttoning the white button down he wears under the expensive suit coat. Looking at the way Enzo, Val, and sometimes Sin dress makes me feel suffocated. I may not get paid as much as they do but at least I don't have to be uncomfortable all the time. "Posso usare il sacco da boxe *Can I use the punching bag*" He asks, pointing to the old punching bag that hangs in the left corner on a short chain.
    "Vai avanti, *Go ahead*," I tell him, gesturing to it with my hand. Brushing my hair back I point to the duct tape next to the bag with my free hand. "Dovrai registrarlo. Si strappa sul lato *You'll need to tape it. It's ripping on the side.*"
     He walks over and turns the bag to see the rip in the center of the bag. Bending down he grabs the tape with a groan, flipping his hair back on his way back up. His shirt hangs open, the tattoo of Melissa's name over his heart on display. I've thought recently about getting something for Vina since I surprisingly don't yet. I eventually want to get our anniversary on the side of my ring finger but I want to do that with Vina (that's even if I can convince her to get another tattoo.)
     "What did you do?" He asks, his Italian accent making it almost too hard to understand his English. He knows he can talk to me in Italian, most of the time he does, but he switches it up every now and then to get himself some practice.
    "Vina non sta rispondendo ai miei messaggi, quindi mi sono preoccupato e l'ho tirato fuori dalla borsa invece di cercarla attraverso messaggi di testo per non rispondere al suo telefono, *Vina's not answering my messages so I got worried and took it out on the bag instead of going off on her through text messages about not answering her phone*," I explain. He chuckles, pulling the end of the tape so it expands.
    "Mi sento un padre orgoglioso sapendo che stai migliorando la gestione della tua rabbia, *I feel like a proud dad knowing you're getting better managing your anger*," he says with a laugh. I roll my eyes, the corner of my mouth lifting a little. After the fight he witnessed between Sin and I and then coming in when Vina and I were arguing he started putting me in check, telling me about how I need to learn to control it because of the the way it affects her. Unlike every other person who's told me to keep myself in check there was understanding with him, I could see he knew the same anger I have in me.
     "I'm trying," I let him know. He gives me a soft smile.
     "Sono orgoglioso di te ... anche se ciò significa che ti rompi le dita. Devi ricordarti di avvolgerli! *I'm proud of you...even if it means you break your knuckles. You have to remember to wrap them!*"
    "O non vuoi che io faccia male a me stesso o che io faccia fronte in modo sano, non puoi avere entrambi, *You either don't want me to hurt myself or for me to cope on a healthy way, you can't have both.*" What I was doing before I started talking to him pops back into my head. "Hai visto che la mia chiave è in arrivo qui? *Did you see my key's on the way in here?*"
    "Your keys?" He asks. I nod, my brows raising. His bright blue eyes drop down to my pants, making me shift in place awkwardly. Following his gaze, my eyes land on my key's hanging from my belt loop where I have it clipped. My face heats up with embarrassment. "Da quanto tempo li cercavi? *How long were you looking for them?*" He asks, trying to compress a laugh.
    "Stai zitto e chiudi la borsa con un nastro. *Shut up and tape the bag*."
      ••••••

        When I got home I expected to see Vina and the kids there as well but it's completely empty. Within three hours I've cleaned every inch of the house which I might get my ass beat for because Vina likes cleaning. Every few minutes I find myself checking my phone to see if she's responded as if I don't have my volume all the way up.
       Leaning against the island, I scroll through my contacts until finding Bex's name. I put it on speaker and set it down, brushing my hair back with my fingers. Blowing air out through my mouth in a exaggerated sigh my shoulders fall. She picks up on the third ring, the sound of Alaric yelling at something loud in the background.
    "Hello?" She asks. I might regret this but I need to do something to get rid of this problem. I can't be running all over the place while Vina's pregnant and I don't want to insider drugs anymore.
   "Hey, is Vina with you?" I ask, hoping to get a no since I don't want Vina knowing about any of this. Her knowing my ADHD is worse will make her feel responsible for trying to fix it.
   "She left about five minutes ago with the kids. Is everything okay?" She asks, sounding worried. Picking the phone up I start walking around the house to move around.
    "Y-yeah. How are you?" I ask. She chuckles, sounding exactly like Vina.
    "I'm fine but I can tell your stalling. What's wrong?" She asks. I bring myself down onto the couch, crossing one leg over the other and moving it up and down.
    "I've had some trouble the last few days with my ADHD, like...really bad," I tell her. It feels a little strange telling her this since it feels more like I'm venting than talking with a doctor. She's the last person I would expect to work in the medical field although it does fit her in a weird way. She's aggressive but she also has that nurturing side of her. "I know I should make an actual appointment to talk about this but...I don't want Vina knowing and getting worried."
    "It's okay," she says, the sound of a door closing in the background. "When's the last time you've taken anything to manage it?" I freeze remembering the last time I took medication for it. Although, it was Ozais that switched them up I haven't felt comfortable enough to take them again in irrational fear that I could get messed up again.
    "Years, I didn't have a good experience last time so I started using weed," I tell her.
    "Then why don't you smoke?" She asks. I push myself up from the couch and walk to the window, flipping up the lock and sliding it open to let in some fresh air.
    "Because I don't want to be high around the kids-"
    "Do you know how many times I walked in on Zav playing blocks high as hell with Vina when she was little? Their relationship seems pretty okay to me and it didn't effect anything," she explains. The thought still makes me nervous because when I get high I just get tired regardless of the kind of weed it is. I don't want to be falling asleep or dozing off while spending time with my family.
    "I just think going back on actual medication would be better, at least for right now until Vina's pregnancy is over." The sound of the door moving makes me turn around. Vina pushes the door open, letting Ez and Cass inside first before following with a small frown on her face. Her long black hair is in a messy ponytail that's hanging almost at the bottom of her head and there's some mascara under her right eye that has been smudged. "I'll call you back," I tell her.
Before she finishes her last sentence I'm off the phone and taking long steps towards the kitchen. My chest tightens with anger looking at Vina and remembering she didn't answer any of messages all day. When she puts her phone down on the counter I see my messages on the lock screen, letting me know she seen them but chose to ignore them. My fists clench at my sides, my wrists shaking from the pressure of my nails digging into my palms.
"Are you too blind or something to answering your fucking phone all day?" I ask her harshly, my voice just below a yell. She snaps her body towards mine but stops herself from saying whatever she was going to say, her bright green eyes falling over towards the living room where Cass is sitting on the ground in front of Ez. She got him to play dolls with her once and she made it a nightly thing, Cass never complains though or says that it's "girly," he just does it without a problem to make her happy. He's a great older brother to her even though she doesn't really see him as that yet but hopefully one day that'll change...shit my thoughts are getting derailed again.
"If you're gonna get mad at me do it in the room, I don't want the kids seeing us," she tells me. My shoulders slump at her words, trying to make myself relax. I know the only reason I'm so upset is because I can't control myself or emotion I feel right now and it's driving me fucking insane; I shouldn't be taking it out on her. "We'll be right back," she tells them before grabbing my wrist and pulling me to the room.
I shake my wrist out of her grasp, her hand hitting her side aggressively. She shuts the door, leaning her back against it. Stray pieces of hair fall in front of her face as she hangs her head down.
"I was texting you all-"
"I'm sorry," she says, her voice cracking. My brows pull together hearing the thickness of her voice. Picking up her head and looking straight at me, I hadn't noticed before but her green eyes are brighter than ever, for the whites are stained red from what I assume was crying. All my anger leaves, turning into concern. She brings her hands up to her face, wiping her tears away. "I'm so sorry-"
"Baby, Vina, it's okay. I overreacted, you don't gotta answer my messages right away. Your safe and home, that's what matters," I hell her, grabbing her hands. She takes them away and wipes her tears again. Shaking her head more hair falls out from the messy hairstyle she has going on. I quickly tuck it away, feeling her lean her head into my touch as I do so.
"That's-that's not why I'm upset," she says, stepping away from the door. She takes her hair down as she walks towards the bed and sits with a sad sigh. Her brows furrow together, making me want to wrap my arms around her and comfort her until she feels better but I can't until she tells me what's going on. "When I went to the doctor, Dr.Lilac gave the results to my tests and this time the results were different. She told me I do have that...preeclampsia she mentioned before and-"
    "What the hell is that?!" I yell. She flinches at the sound of it, turning her head to the side and squeezing her eyes shut. Taking deep, calming breaths, I place my hands on her knees and squat known in front of her. Her plump lips are so swollen it makes me want to kiss them just so I can convince myself that's what it's from and not distress. "I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell at you. This isn't your fault to be apologizing for."  
     "It's my body, Idris. Therefore, it's my fault," she says. "I thought the problems with being or becoming a mom would be the autism but no it has to be something else that I can't fucking..." her words trail off and she starts crying again. Wrapping my arms around her, she buries her head in the crook of my neck the best she can in this position of her being above me. "I'm sorry."
     "Stop apologizing," I tell her, running my fingers through the ends of her hair. "It's your body but you only have so much control over what happens with it. You can't be mad at yourself for this, baby. Now, I'll try asking nicer this time, what is that?"
    She goes on quickly explaining to me it has something to do with her blood pressure but I have a hard time understanding exactly what that means. "I never feel like I'm too stressed or if I am I try calming down, I-I-"
   "I'll tell you right now that how you're feeling right now isn't good for the baby then," I tell her, putting my hand over her heart to immediately feel it pounding. More tears fall from her eyes. "This is going to be okay...right? Like you can't...you can't-" I can't even bring myself to let those words fall from my mouth.
    "She said it could be fatal, which is why they usually like to do a delivery as soon as possible but as of right now she can't because the baby still needs to mature," she tells me. I feel my entire body become hot.
    "Fatal for you...or fatal for the baby?" I ask, my voice shaking. The muscles in my thighs start to burn from being squatted down for so long.
   "Possibly both," she answers. Letting out a shaky breath, my hands slide off her knees as I stand up. My heart hammers in my chest thinking about the possibility of losing her from this. My clammy hands rest in my hips as I start pacing back and forth. Out of the corner of my eye I see Vina stand up. "She said I have to take it as easy as possible. Tomorrow I'll call my boss to let her know I have to start working from home."
    "You aren't going to work at all. You need to relax," I tell her. Her lips press together.
    "I can't, doing nothing will make me feel terrible and that will just stress me out. I'll take it easy but I have to work," she tells me. Swallowing down the lump in my throat I push away the scary thoughts that are starting to come to my head about her dying. I don't want to even ask if that's in "extreme" cases or her case. "I-I'm sorry I wasn't answering but I didn't want to talk about all that over the phone. I was also scared of you being upset with me."    
     My brows pull together in shock. I would never be upset with her over something like this or anything that's out of her control. Yes, I may react angrily at first but I just need a few minutes to cool down and I'm always all ears for her. She should never have to fear of me being mad about her health or anything else of that sort, I want her to be able to come to me with no second thought that I'll be anything but loving towards her but it's my fault because of my actions in the past. My first reaction is always to get mad and be defensive, I have to learn to stop that for her.
      "Baby, I just want you to be healthy for yourself and our family. I'm sorry I get mad easily and without reason, I'm still trying to work on that," I say, taking slow steps over to her. Grabbing her hand, she stands up and rests her head on my chest. My free hand rests on the back of her head, stroking through her thick black hair. "I love you, this and nothing else will ever change that. We'll get through it, baby."  I wish I could end that by promising her that everything will be okay but I can't, the unknown is terrifying now because I can't lose this damn woman.
     "I'm scared," she mumbles, her voice cracking. Taking her head in my hands I bring her lips up to mine. Her hands slide up my sides until resting in my shoulders.
     "It's gonna be okay," I tell her. She nods, a few tears still escaping. She wraps her arms around my waist, pressing herself tightly against me. My fingers repeatedly stroke her hair back behind her ear, knowing it's the only gentle touch she likes.
A soft knock on the door makes me turn my head, Vina lifting her's off my chest but keeping her arms locked behind my back. Cass slowly walks in in with my phone in his hand, some of his chocolate brown hair falling in front of his eyes. Looking down at the screen my birth mother's name pops up on the screen while my phone vibrates like crazy.
"Are you okay?" He asks Vina, looking up at her with furrowed brows. The concern on his face is evident, the most emotion I've seen on him since he first got here. She lets her arms fall from me and whips under her eyes to rid of any lingering tears.
"I'm okay," she assures him. If I'm not mistaken before he turns to leave the room he shoots me a stern look, his bright green eyes hardening as if warning me not to hurt her. Usually, I would get mad at someone thinking it's me who's put the tears in Vina's eyes but I remind myself he's never had a healthy example of a couple or lived in a household where the dominant male isn't an abusive bastard. So instead of getting angry I give him a small nod and smile, thankful?he's protective over her. He hasn't shown any connection to any of us until now and if it's going to happen with anyone I'm happy it's with him and her.
Stepping away from Vin,  I press ignore and decide to text my mother instead. There's no need for me to hear that woman's voice more than needed to just get in a bad mood all over again. She texts me back within a minute saying she was just reminding me about dinner at eight. Looking at the top of my screen for the time my chest tightens seeing that it's twenty minutes to seven.
"We have to leave in a little bit to drop the kids off then go to dinner," I tell Vina. Her shoulders slump but she nods. I know she doesn't want to go but I also don't want to do this alone. Walking over to the closet and pushes the clothes over to take out one of her dresses hanging up. Taking it off the hanger she throws the red dress to the bed and grabs the hem of her shirt, lifting it up and over her head. My eyes fall to her chest immediately, my mouth salivating at the sight. I love her body all the time, but fuck, the things this pregnancy has been doing...just damn. Her breasts are larger than normal, her thighs and hips fuller, her hair looks healthier lately and to just top that all off her baby bump drives me fucking insane.
"I'll get ready in the bathroom," she tells me, snapping me out of my gaze while unbuttoning her jeans.
"It seems like you're already getting dressed in here," I joke with a short laugh. Rolling her eyes and walks towards the dresser and opens the drawer she keeps her bras and panties in. Walking up behind her I reach my hand out and move around the soft bundle of fabric. She rests her body against the front of mine, side eyeing me with clear nervousness. I slide one of my hands down her side, feeling the curve of her waist on my palm. My dick hardens in my jeans, making me draw her closer against me. She lets out a sigh, her cheeks flaring up as red as her dress. I was doing something...that wasn't trying to fuck her...what was it?....Looking at the box of undergarments I snap back into it, remembering the action at hand but not the specific set I was initially looking for. The sight of the bright red lace panties puts the pieces back together. I pick them up, the almost see through material dangling from my index and middle fingers. "Wear these with this," I tell her, grabbing the matching bra that was folded beside it. She snatched the garments from my hand and fists them waking back to the bed to get the dress.
"We aren't having any sex tonight," she tells me, picking the dress up and setting it over her arm. My brows raise. What the fuck-
"I apologized-"
"Yes, you did; it has nothing to do with that. I just don't feel good enough so I'd rather let you know now before getting back here tonight and you thinking we're gonna...you know," she says, her eyes trailing away from me at the end. I love how sometimes talking about sex is uncomfortable to her, it lets me know there's still some lingering innocence that I haven't ruined...yet.
"But if you're feeling better...?"
"I'll still be exhausted," she tells me.
"You can sleep in the ca-"
"Stop and start getting ready!"
•••••••

The ride to the restaurant after dropping the kids off is silent. My hand rests on Vina's thigh holding her hand, her thumb sweeping over the back of my hand softly. She keeps her head leant against the window, her eyes closed as if taking the suggestion I brought up earlier about sleeping during the drive.
Stopping at a stop light, my fingers wiggle around the wheel. I don't know how I'm going to manage to sit through this entire dinner without one) loosing my shit, and two) not moving around like a toddler. Just driving right now I want to start doing fucking donuts in the middle of the intersection. I know I could talk to Vina about all this but now knowing she can't be under any type of stress I especially now won't put on her.
Like always when I think about how to get this under control the easier tactic comes to mind but I push it away the quickest I can only for my head to bring it back up but with images of myself using. Would one time really hurt?
"You can go now," Vina says, snapping me out of it, her voice groggy with sleep. Within minutes we're turning into the parking lot. Seeing how many cars are parked outside I know this ain't going to be good for either Vina or me. There's not one average looking vehicle lined up, every one of them screaming "I have money and a million lawyers!"...So do I but from doing very different things.
"Idris-"
"If it gets too much just tell me and we'll leave," I tell her, squeezing my hand. Looking around anxiously, she nods and opens the passenger door. I jump out and lock it after her door shuts, trying to open the backseat to check that it locked. We're in the rich part of the county, I have no idea why the fuck I'm worried about that around here but I guess it's always gonna be a force of habit. The end of her red lace dress stops just below the knee, hugging her body too nicely.
I take my phone out of my pocket and text my mother asking where she is. Stopping on the side walk I pull Vina close to my side. A few seconds later I get a response saying she's five minutes away. Tucking my phone back in my pocket I turn my body towards Vina. She keeps her head down, looking at the floor to avoid seeing the crowd of people near the door. Running my hands down her arms she peaks her head up at me, forcing a small smile.
A loud laugh makes her jump, stepping closer to me by instinct. Looking around the group of middle aged guys stand in a half circle with beer bottles in their hands laughing it up but their eyes are on Vina. My jaw clenches angrily. Shifting in place, I let Vina cling herself to me while trying to keep my cool. One of the guys with slicked back black hair like Val's gestures towards Vina with his chin, the two men standing next to him smirking and eyeing eyeing her. I know there's seven of them and one of me but...I'd take my fucking chances.
The next few minutes seem to go on forever. I don't miss the judge mental looks I get when the couples and families walk past us, looking me up and down with wide eyes or disgusted expressions. However, one of the families kids gave me a small smile after looking at my tattoos...he's gonna be their trouble child for sure.
"Idris!" I hear in a high pitched voice behind me. Turning around, my arm slides around Vina's shoulders. My mom and her husband walk our way with a short girl behind them. Vina takes a small step back and takes my hand, brining it up to her lips and kissing the back, her light red lipstick leaving the print of her lips. "It's so nice to see you again!" I can't say the same...
"I'm Jason, Arden's-I mean you're mom's husband," the man next to her says. He's not that much taller than her, his body as skinny as a pole. He looks like he's going to die if he doesn't get another cigarette within a few seconds. The grey suit wrapped over his body is expensive looking just like everyone else's outfit here. Vina fits in but I seem to be the only man here without a penguin costume, dressed in what I usually wear when I have to dress "nice" which just consists of a black button down and black jeans. Maybe it's the chain dangling on my side that makes it look less classy...or it's just cause I'm me.
"This is our daughter, your step-sister, Nes," my mom says, taking the girl that's behind them by the arm and pulling her to the center. She has the same color hair as mine that we both got from our mom but her eyes are crystal blue with some light brown freckles spread across her nose and cheeks like her dad. She doesn't look older than sixteen but it could also just be t-shirt styled dress and flats she's wearing making her appear younger.
"I prefer Aggie, short for Agnes," she says, her voice softer than my moms. I politely shake her hand, forcing a smile down at her. Clearing my throat, I place my hand on the small of Vina's back. She looks up, her lips curved upward into a fake smile.
"This is my wife, Corvina," I say, introducing them to her although I really don't want to. Instead of shaking their hands she keeps her fingers laced tightly with mine, her eyes scoping around to avoid their eye contact.
     "Got a thing for Latina's, huh?" My moms husband says, smacking his hand on my arm in attempt to rid of some of the tension. I shake my head.
   "Just one," I say, squeezing Vina's hand. She shakes it, silently telling me to loosen my grip. We start walking towards the door, the group of guys putting in the effort to turn their heads to try to see Vina's backside but I put her in front of me. That's my ass. Getting inside the lights are brought down to a dim setting, quiet jazz music coming through what I assume is the walls because I don't see any speakers. Even the waiters are in suits and dresses...I can't help but laugh.
     Looking down at Vina she has the same hidden smile that I do her shoulders shaking gently before clearing her throat and looking up at me. We just aren't the type for this shit. A waitress with long brown hair and blonde highlights walks us over to one of the tables outside. I pull out Vina's seat and scoot her in before sitting beside her and taking her hand under the table. She moves her chair closer to me, rubbing her thumb over my hand. My knees bounce under the table and my mind starts racing with all the things that could go wrong within the next hour or so.
      "Would you like some wine?" The waitress asks, holding two bottles of both red and white wine. We all shake our heads except for Aggie who says she'll take some. Our mother and her father gasp loudly, earning a scolding look thrown her way. She puts her hands up in defense, a nervous smile on her face.
    "I was just kidding," she says quietly. I chuckle, seeming to me the only one who appreciated the joke. She gives me a shy smile before putting her head down. My mom clears her throat, putting her hands on the table. It's so strange, almost wrong, to be sitting here with her while she's completely straight. I've only known this woman as a drunk and druggie, now she's sitting here in a white dress and diamonds happily married with a daughter.
I shift in place, taking my hand out of Vina's and rubbing them over my lap. I need to get up but I don't want them thinking I'm going to go smoke or some shit.
"I thought you guys were married?" My mom asks, her brows brought together in curiosity. I cock a confused brow but notice her eyes drop down to Vina's hand. I hold up mine to show my band. "One sided marriage?" She asks with a laugh. I know she's trying to only make conversation but it's coming off the wrong way.
Vina places her hand on the chain hanging around her neck that holds her ring. My moms face contorts into further confusion. "I don't like things on my hands," she explains quietly. Her voice is shaky and nervous.
"Oh yeah, I'm sorry I forgot about the autism thing," she says, her eyes awkwardly dropping to the table. Vina's chest falls as she lets out a loud sigh, her head tilting to the side.
"Yeah...thing," she says with an eye roll. I place my hand on her thigh, trying to hide the smile that wants to come to play. The next few minutes are spent them telling us about their marriage and jobs and I'm thankful when the waitress comes back to take our orders and brings the drinks.
"So what about you guys? What do you do for a living?" Jason asks, folding his hands in front of him. His brows furrow, eyes narrowing as if we have to impress him with our answers. A laugh bubbles up in my throat thinking of my response.
"I work in finance at a doctors office with my mom who's a nurse," Vina answers and looks at me. I put my hands under me to stop my wiggling fingers.
"I'm a human torturer," I answer flatly. All their heads snap towards me, eyes widening except for Aggie who snickers. I force a sarcastic smile and sip the water in front of me. "Or you could say I do humanitarian work but I thought it'd be better to be straight up."
"I-I..."
"I'm just fucking with you, I'm a mechanic," I say with a laugh. That's a lie but not a complete lie. Within the next year I want to stop working for Sin completely and buy a garage to start my own auto shop like I've wanted. I have everything I need but the only thing that would hold me back is my record...that I will have to go through Sin to get cleared.
    "So how long have you been together?" My mom ask, trying to change the subject. Jason turns around and wave his hand at one of the waiters, grabbing his glass and gesturing to it for the wine. Yeah buddy, you're gonna need it with me.
     "Seven years," I answer, crossing my arms over my chest. I notice Vina's eyes drop under the table, brows pinching together at the sight of my bouncing knees. Looking towards her I give her a small smile, taking her attention off of the annoying bouncing. I notice that my knee is rubbing against hers, no wonder she started looking. I shift in place, placing my legs further from hers.
     "How'd two people like you meet?" Aggie asks with a short laugh. I raise my brows, she presses her lips together. "I don't mean it in a rude way at all, I actually think you guys are adorable. You got the whole...shy meets badass vibes going on; it's really cute. I just meant that you two seem very different in obvious ways, so....how?"... "You're stunning by the way!" She tells Vina.
    "Thank you, so are you," Vina says with the first genuine smile I've seen on her face all day.
    "We met in high school after I got released from prison and happened to be neighbors as well, so I forced myself on her," I explains. My eyes widen realizing how bad that sounds. "Not like that...that sounded really bad."
••••••

The mood never lightens up throughout the dinner. Since it's later more people have started filing, making me Vina kick my ankle ever few minutes to tell me she wants to leave but these people won't give me the change to end the dinner. Poor Aggie looks bored out of her mind, every time she tries pitching in her two cents she gets shut down.
Call me overprotective but I know what I see and what I've been seeing tonight is Jason's eyes glued to my wife's chest for the last hour. I'm used to men looking at her and as much as it gets under my skin I never literally have the urge to kill them with a steak knife...but maybe that's just cause I usually don't have one right next to me. He's been trying to ask Vina questions here and there but she gives short answers which doesn't surprise me.
"So what did you go to prison for?" My mom asks after Jason has been gone to the bathroom for a few minutes. She leans her elbows on the table, her brows arched at me. Out of the corner of my eye I see Aggie's expression contort into pure shock. The corner of my mouth curves up into a grin. My mom's stern expression falls, her shoulders falling. She shakes her head, her jaw clenching. "You look so much like him it's crazy. Have you ever seen him pictures of his father, Corvina?"
Vina picks her head up, brushing a curl out of her eye. "No, I'd rather not have anyway to compare him to his father." She sighs, tilting her head to the side.
"He was a handsome bastard...until the drugs," she says. My tongue separates my lips. My chest rises as I take in a deep breath. Vina takes my hand under the table, squeezing it tightly. I want to leave. "Are you gonna answer my question?" My eyes narrow at her.
"No, I don't want you knowing anything about me. The less you know the better; I don't trust you or your little husband either. The only level headed person in here seems to be her, and you guys even seem to hate your own daughter," I snap, letting Vina's hand fall. My mother's body stiffens. I lean back in the chair, my brows raised in a challenging manner. "I'm surprised you didn't have a glass tonight-"
"Don't bring that old stuff up-"
"It's not old to me," I tell her. "You told me you were my mother and it was like I was a little fucking kid again being left to be beaten by my own fucking father. Now seeing you so happy and shit makes me fucking sick," I say through clenched teeth.
Vina places her hand on my arm, clearing her throat awkwardly. Her cheeks glow bright red, clearing feeling uncomfortable. "I'll be back," she says, gesturing towards the bathroom with her head. I nod, chewing on the inside of my cheek. The table fell silent after my rant which I can't tell how that's making me feel. I'm happy the anger I'm feeling is keeping me seated, at least something is working.
"I'm...I'm sorry, I didn't think about it that way. I should have figured this was very different for you," my mom says, her eyes shining with tears. This bitch has no reason to cry. "I just figured after so long it all went away for you too, that you learned to move on."
"I was five when you disappeared, the trauma is the only way I have any memory of you," I tell her. She puts her head down in shame. "I did move on, it went away for me because I started using drugs to stop feeling. I didn't have you guys to help me through shit, the drugs helped me through everything. Then I met her who helped me and continues to." She lets out a laugh. God damnit, I know that kind of laugh all too well.
"I can see just by looking at her what kind of woman she is, and it doesn't surprise me looking at the two of you that it works. But you could do a hell of a lot better if you're gonna look for something you can toy around," she tells me. It's been seven fucking years, she thinks I'm still toying around.
"I know you have a series of fucked up relationships and this marriage seems to be no different, but I genuinely love my wife. I've loved her since the beginning and it's never been a game to me; I'm not my father," I tell her, knowing that's the road she's trying to go down. At first she was trying to guilt trip me but you can't fool me; I'm the master of guilt tripping and mind fucking people, it's an art that comes in handy at work. Maybe Vina could just because it would take me by such surprise since she doesn't lie, but no one else.
Aggie leans her elbows on the table, her chin in her hands. "I should have been allowed the wine if you were planning of starting this shit..."
••••••
~Vina's POV~

I look at myself in the mirror and take deep breaths, closing my eyes every few seconds while relaxing my shoulders. The bathroom is marble decorated with dim lighting and soundproof walls, drowning out the sound of all the people outside. Instead there's very quiet music coming through a small speaker hung in the back corner.
Tucking my phone in my bra, I fix my hair and open the door. My eyes take in the scene in front of me, anxiety filling my chest. Something tight wraps around my arm, yanking me back into the women's bathroom. Letting me go, I stumble back into my back but one of the stall's that's door is thankfully locked from being out of order, breaking a horrible fall. Idris's mother's husband stands in front of the door, his fingers twisting the lock and turning the knob to test it.
"I'm sorry I don't mean to frighten you at all," he says with a laugh. "I just wanted to ask you something privately just because Idris doesn't seem like he would want to answer these questions." I raise my chin, crossing my arms over my chest. He tucks his hands into his pockets. "The baby...how far along are you?" He asks with a smile.
"Five and a half months," I answer, my heart beating in my chest this bathroom suddenly feels way small that it really is; the capacity is seven but it feels like two.
"You look great," he says, looking me up and down, taking a few steps closer. My arms gall to my sides. I start walking the opposite way, heading towards the sinks so I can be closer to the door. My body tenses feeling something brush against my butt. Spinning around he grabs me again by the arm and puts me against the wall separating the door and sinks, my butt pressed tightly against his crotch. My ankles shake in the short heels, threatening to give out on me.
Leaning over me he drags his rough grip down my sides until grabbing my hips and grinding himself against me. He lets out ragged, breathless pants, his hair falling in front of his face. I force my side straight and try pushing myself back but he takes a fist full of my hair and pulls me towards the sink. Wrapping his free hand under my left thigh he hoists me up onto the counter.
Forcing my legs apart, I try pushing them together but he presses his elbow into my pelvis. I cry out in pain, tears clouding my vision. My hands let go of his that were trying to fight him off, pushing his elbow away and letting my legs open to get relief from the pressure on stomach.
The red lace bunches up at my waist, putting my bright red lace panties on display for the stranger. Getting a quick glance down at myself, I see a shine of metal tucked into the waistband of my panties. I usually forget about the pocketknife Idris makes me carry around, I hook it there whenever we go anywhere where it can't be seen. He would have definitely grabbed it by now if he's noticed it.
     He knocks my body back against the mirror, my head jointing to the side from impact. He hides his face in my neck, sucking on my skin. I  manage to wiggle my hand down to my side and slip the knife from my panties. The blade falls loose easily which usually would be concerning but I'm thankful for it now. He sneaks his hand between my legs, rubbing his thumb against my clit. The hand holding the knife swings forward, the blade slicing into the aide of his face.
     "FUCKING BITCH!" He yells, wiping the blood from his cheek with one hand while the other wraps around my neck. I swing it again, not paying attention to a certain area. The tip sweeps across his neck, breaking the skin gracefully. Blood squirts straight out from the side when breaking his carotid artery on the right side. I push him away from me when he lets go to cover his bleeding neck. He falls to the ground,dark red liquid oozing around him.
   I jump down from the sink, pulling down my dress. I take my phone out of my bra and shakily call Idris, putting myself in the corner with my arm wrapped around my side. My ribs are sore from the pressure his elbow was putting on them.
     "Vi-"
     "I need help in the bathroom...now," I tell him, clearing my throat. My knees shake nervously. Jason's body lays completely still on the ground surrounded in a pool of blood. I hang up and put my phone back where it was tucked in the side of my bra. Looking up at the ceiling, I press my palms together and bring them to my lips, closing my eyes. "Lo siento *I'm sorry,*" I sigh.
     The knob starts jiggling and my phone buzzes in my bra. I carefully hop over Jason's body, turning the knock and opening the door a few inches to see who it is before pulling it open. Idris pushes it further and slides in without opening it too much. His body jerks back into the door with shock, a loud gasp leaving his lips.
   "Cosa diavolo è successo?! *What the hell happened?!*" He asks in Italian so I can't understand. I raise my brows, holding the knife out to him. He takes it from me and looks back at the body. "Again, what the hell happened?"
    "H-he came in h-here and locked the d-door. He started g-grab-bi-grab-" I start hyperventilating looking at the dead body, the fact that I killed him setting in. I'm not like my mom or dad, this isn't an easy thing for me. Idris grabs my wrist and pulls me towards the sinks. "I-I don't want to be right there."
    "Did he touch you?" He asks, cupping my fave in his hands. I nod, closing eyes to let my tears fall. He turns, a low growl coming from deep in his chest. "I'm gonna ki-Never mind, you already did." 
    "I-I killed him," I say, turning my gaze back to his mother's husband's body. This is going to be one hell of of explanation. How do we even get out of this situation? I jump over the body and lock the door again before anyone can come in, remembering we're in a public setting. How are we supposed to get the body out? Idris's mom and stepsister will surely have questions and I doubt they'd believe any lie we try telling.
     Shaking my hands out I start walking back and forth in front of the door. Idris doesn't say anything to me, just kneels down next to the body and turns Jason's head to the side to see the cut. His lips are pressed in a thin line when he looks up at me. I wrap my arms around myself, trying to stop the shaking of my hands. I can feel a headache coming on and my heart is going a million beats a minute.
      "It's okay-"
     "This isn't okay," I tell him, not liking him sugarcoating it. He pushes himself up and comes over, grabbing my hands. I try shaking them out of his grasp, not in the right place mentally to deal with him. His hands on me make me want to scream, it feels like I'm being grabbed at even though he's hardly touching me. I press myself back into the door, covering my face with my hands. He stays back, rubbing his stubbled jaw. "I killed him...I killed someone." Knowing my dad or mom has taken lives has never bothered me. Knowing Idris kills people doesn't bother me. However, even though I know I had good reason and it was self defense, it doesn't sit well that it's now me who's killed someone.
      He probably told people he would see them tomorrow after leaving and now he won't be seeing them ever again. He could have had plans that now he'll never get to do. He won't be right back to the table like he told Aggie and Idris's mom. He won't go home with his family. Because of me.
     "Vina, baby, I promise you that it's okay. I'll clean this up, you won't get in any trouble; it was self defense anyways," he tells me, taking hesitant steps towards me. I let him take me in his arms. He wipes my tears away with the rough pads of his thumbs. I lean into his touch, sniffling.
    "Your mom and sister-"
    "I don't think it would good for them to have a rapist in their home if he were alive," he tells me before I can finish. I know he's right, for all we know he could have been terrible to them behind closed doors. But I still don't like that it was me who dealt his cards. Cupping my face in his hands he forces me to look up at him. My tear filled eyes find his briefly before trailing off. "You're okay," he tells me, his thumb caressing my cheek.
     Nodding, I let him bring his lips down to mine and press them together. His lips taste like the pasta sauce from the food we both ordered that wasn't that good. He tries pulling back but I bring my arm up around his neck to keep him in place, not ready to let go. Kissing him I can only have my mind on one thing and I need a distraction...even if it is right next to a dead body.
     "Vina," Idris says against my lips, shaking his head. My fingers rake through his hair, pulling at the ends gently. He lets out a breathless sigh. "Are you sure?" He asks, grabbing my jaw and forcing it head back so I'll let him speak. I nod, reaching behind me for the zipper of my dress so it bunched at my stomach. He helps me pull it down my body, letting the red lingerie show that he picked out.

Only undoing his belt and jeans, I pull them down enough to let his erection spring free. He picks me up by my thighs, my ankles locking behind his back. He tugs my panties to the side and positions the head of his cock at my entrance. My hands bunch the sleeves of his shirt as he enters me with one hard thrust. My eyes squeeze shut. Grabbing my shoulder, he pushes me back into the door and slams up into me. I bounce myself up and down on his length the best I can, my head rubbing against the door.
      "Fuck, you feel so good," he moans, nuzzling his face in my neck. I nip at his ear, tugging his head to the side for better access. I trail small kisses down his neck as far as I can reach. He twitches inside me, hands tightening at my waist. My heart pounds in my chest and I realize that having sex may not be the best idea. After this well definitely have to put it on hold or find ways not be as...intense with each other.
     "I'm close," I tell him, feeling that familiar building tension in my lower abdomen. It triggers some pain but nothing I can't ignore. His hand slides down my chest and pulls the cups of my bra to the side, letting my breasts free. He bends his head down, taking one of them in his mouth while the other is messaged by his calloused hand. I continue jerking my body up and down on him, sweat beading my body. My breaths come out in loud, greatness pants. "Idris!"
    "Cum, baby. Come on my cock," he mumbles into my chest, his hot breath fanning over my nipple. Chills run down my spine as my back arches off the wall, my body pressing completely against his. My fingers tighten in his hair, pulling at the back harshly. He twitches inside me as he releases his seed, his chest rising and falling rapidly. Strands of dark blonde hair fall in front of his eyes.
    Untangling my legs from around him, I slide down the wall and start fixing my dress. He pulls his jeans and boxers up, fixing himself up before taking his phone out of his pocket.
    "Who are you calling?" I ask, still trying to catch my breath. I stay in corner with my arms wrapped around myself, as far from the body as I can get.
    "Your dad; Alaric is out of town with Nava for their anniversary," he tells me, putting the phone up for his ear. My face heats up and I feel myself get nervous all over again.
   "Not my dad!" I shout in fear. My dad might kill people himself but I doubt he'll be cool with me doing it too!...I act as if I'm still a child and he has any authority over me...who the hell am I kidding, he still does regardless of if I'm an adult. "My mom!" Yes I care what my mom thinks but she doesn't see me as if I'm still a toddler.
    "Does your mom know how to cover up a murder and get a dead body out of here without people knowing?"... "Never mind, she probably does. I'm already calling him anyways!" Great, now I feel like a murderer and a scared child.
      ••••••
                           
       Because of the amount of times people have tried getting into the bathroom Idris wrote "Out Of Order" on a ripped off piece of cardboard from the tissue box on the sink counter and stuck it on the door. My dad should be here any minute and I keep going through all the possibilities of what could happen when he finds out. I genuinely can't imagine him being happy with me.
    A knock of the door makes me jump away from it, almost tripping into the puddle of Jason's blood. His body is turning a yellowish color and it makes me feel sick to my stomach being in the same room as it. Idris thankfully has been letting me keep to myself in the corner but he's been pacing around like crazy and trying to pick the loose paint of the walls next to the mirror. He shoots straight up when hearing the knock and takes ling steps over, opening the door as little as possible to let my dad inside.
    "Where's a window?" He says with only looking at the body for a second. I step over and tap his arm, he jumps away letting out a scared shriek. "What the hell-DID YOU-Did you do this?" He says, remembering not to yell.
    "I-I-"
    "It was self-defense, Zavian. He was trying to touch her and she used the pocket knife I gave her for situations like this one," Idris explains for me. My dad's eyes widen, snapping back towards me. I put my head down, my cheeks burning with shame. He sighs loudly, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and tugging me into his side with a tight squeeze like he use to when I was little.
    "I was hoping the day would never come but I knew you had it somewhere in you to do some crazy shit," he says with a laugh, dropping his arm. Idris points up at the window at the very top of the wall.
    "Ugh que mierda! *Ugh what the fuck!*" he groans. "You push pick him up and I'll start pushing. What's on the other side?"
    "Parking lot," Idris answers, bending down next to Jason's head. The blood gets all over his clothes when he picks Jason up by the shoulders and drags him towards the window. I try minding my own business in the corner while they work on lifting the body up until they can use his head to push the window open more.
"He's one heavy son of a bitch," my dad says, the veins in his arms popping as he uses all his strength helping Idris push the body up. Eventually they manage to get the body half way out the window until they can't reach his feet. "Kneel down, bitch," my dad says, pushing Idris to his knees. My husband looks up at my dad with wide confused eyes when he raises his foot to place it on his shoulder, his crotch directly in Idris's face.
"I'd rather not be in his position with you in front of my wife," he says, helping my dad place his other foot up in his other shoulder. His knees shake as he pushes himself up and my dad pushes Jason out by his feet. Idris drops to his knees without holding onto my dad, sending him flying to the floor. My hand shoots up to my mouth.
"Let's go outside and we can out the body in my truck," my dad says as I reach down and pull him up by his hand. Looking me up and down his expression hardens. "Who the hell told you you could wear that?!" He exclaims, turning his body towards Idris with furrowed brows.
"I'm mar-"
"I don't give a fuck your married or seventy two, turtlenecks never go out of style," he says, pointing his tattooed finger at me. Clearing my throat, I look a the puddle of blood.
"What's supposed to happen with that?" I ask, pointing down at it. They both follow my gaze. Crossing his arms, my dad turns on his heels towards the door.
"I'll be right back," he says. Idris and I side eye each other nervously. I grab his hand before he can reach the door, stopping him before he can unlock it. "I'm the adult, let me handle it," he says, making Idris scuff. He unlocks the door and opens it to let himself out.
Leaning my back against it I let my eyes flutter shut. I'm exhausted from the day. It's been too much for me to handle both mentally and physically. I want to go home and lay down with Idris and the kids without any of this preeclampsia stuff or killing people stuff on my mind.
The sound of screams and glass breaking makes me jump and run towards Idris. His arms immediately wrap around me, crushing me further into his chest. His hands clasp over my ears, blocking out the noise that's somehow loud enough to get through the sound proof walls.
Letting one arm fall, he reaches behind him and takes out his gun, keeping it at his side while I curl into him. The door swings open and my dad runs back in wearing a ski mask, the only way I'm able to recognize him being the tattooed on his hands. The jug full of water threatens to spill with each step he takes until he spills it all over the floor, the dark red liquid turning light pink as it starts running down towards the hole under the sink that catches excess water.
"Turn the sinks on," he orders Idris, rubbing back out. His voice is muffled by the cloth over his mouth, sounding like he's talking through a phone which brings back childhood memories of talking to him on the phone when he would be locked up...now he's helping me cover up a homicide. I help Idris turn the sinks on and my dad runs in with two white towels, throwing them on the ground. "We need to hurry," he says in a whisper yell.
"Take Vina to go find an emergency exit in the back," Idris tells him. I shake my head, scared of someone running in and catching Idris for this. I could handle a lot but not him going to prison.
"You're coming with me," I tell Idris. My arms cross over my chest realizing he's not moving anywhere. "I'm not going anywhere without the both of you!"
"Let's go to the car," Idris says, trying to take my hand but I swat it away.
"Go with him!" My dad says, raising his voice a little bit to get his point across. My shoulders slump, listening to him over Idris. Crossing my arms over my chest, I spin around on my heel and let Idris unlock the door.
He keeps his hand pressed to the small of my back as we walk out towards the kitchen. I struggle to keep up with his fast paced steps, my short legs making it difficult. He pushes the back door with the word "Emergency" painted in black letters on it, swinging me out by my arm. He looks around before relaxing to make sure there's no one. Soon the cops will be here, surely everyone in there started calling the police.
"This is too much for me to handle," I say, brushing my fingers through my hair nervously. He laces his fingers with mine and starts pulling me towards the trash. It's not long until my dad runs over to us out of breath, hunching over with his hands on his knees as he pulls the mask off his face. His tan skin glows red from the high temperature of his body, panting loudly to catch his breath.
    "Shit," Zav says, hearing the sound of sirens in the distance. Standing up straight he flips his hair out of his face. "I'll ride with you guys," he says. Nodding, Idris leads the way over to the truck that's parked at the end of the parking lot. Some of the many cars have left but a lot are still there with their owners leans against them waiting for the cops to show up.
    He unlocks the door and opens the passenger for me. Once I'm seated I catch a glimpse of blue and red flashing lights in the reviews and slap Idris's shoulder. He snaps his attention down the road, his green eyes widening. A series of curses is said under his breath as he slams the door shut and runs around the car.
    The both the back and drivers doors open and my dad and Idris get in, in different spots than I was expecting. My dad turns the car on and quickly pulls out of the parking spot as fast as he can, a few bystanders having to move out of the way. He wasn't trying to be obvious before but now he doesn't seem to care.
    Pressing myself back into the seat, I close my eyes and let my fingers tap on the top of my thighs as of I'm playing an invisible piano. The flashing lights illuminate the inside of the car as the cops start catching up, now after us. I hear a laugh leave my dad's mouth and I glare over at him. Idris's hand grasps my shoulder from the backseat.
    "Relax," he tells me as softly he can without it being weird in front of my father. "I let him drive for a reason," he says with a laugh. My dad rolls his window down and sticks his hand out the window, holding his middle finger up towards the cops.
    "What the he-"
    "Eh, calm down. I can see my bitch as brother's face in the drivers seat; he ain't gonna do shit...pussy." Idris chuckles in the back, enjoying with while I on the other hand work on trying to calm myself down. My dad takes a sharp right turn, my body clinging against my door. I press my knees together, rubbing the side of one that's now sore. "Are you sure you can get away?" Idris asks him.
    "Have I ever gotten us even close to getting arrested...no, that's Alaric," my dad says, having to shout so he can be heard over the blaring sirens. Placing my hands over my ears I lean my head back and imagine, well try to imagine myself somewhere else. He continues taking turns until we're going down a dark empty road without anything but dead fields. "They aren't getting tired tonight are they?" My dad asks Idris.
     "No," he answers flatly. Something is tossed onto my lap, making me open one eye to glance down. My hand wraps around my dads phone.
    "Call Si-"
    "She doesn't need to be doing anything," Idris tells Zav. Out of nowhere the sound of guns going off starts coming from behind us, the cops now firing at us. Yelling an aggressive curse, Idris bends down and reaches for something under the drivers seat. He pulls out a larger sized hand gun. My dad rolls down his window from the front.
    "Call Sin and t-"
    "She's not calling Sin," Idris repeats to my father. My dad jerks the car to the side, making Idris tip over and hit his head on the window. He glares at my dad through the review mirror.
    "She's still my daughter, she still listens to me. You start fucking shooting; Vina, call Sin and tell him I need car backup on the corner of Willis and Park street," he tells us. I do what he says without question, quickly opening my dad's phone and searching for Sin's name. My hair starts flying around me from the back window being open. My dad throws the mask to the back for him to put on before sticking the majority of his body out the window. The sound of the sirens and shots going off from now both Idris and the police are too loud for my hands to drown out.
     "Hello," Sin asks in an annoyed voice. I would roll my eyes if we weren't in this situation.
    "My-My dad said he needs b-back in Willis and Park streets," I tell him as quickly as I can without stuttering every word. I can't hear myself speak, only the background noise. My pounding heart puts pain in my ribs and an ache in my head.
   "Vina?!" He shouts, making me have to pull the phone back. "What the hell are you doing on your dad's work ph-"
    "I just said!" I yell back, the anxiety too much for me to take. I need to scream somehow, I can't care who it's towards. "He needs backup on Willis and Park streets! The-the cops are behind us!"
   "What the-Fuck, Enzo's on it," he says with a sigh. My fingers tap the back of the phone as I look behind me again. Idris throws himself back inside the car and rolls the window up, his dirty blonde hair messy in front of his face. Bending back down he looks for something again, having to literally get on the floorboard see it. He gets back up with a pack of ammo to reload the gun.
    As he start to beat the corner of Willis and Park streets I see headlights comes up from both ways of the intersection. Idris rolls the window back down and continues shooting.
    "Hello?" I hear suddenly from the other end of the line. I forgot I was still on the phone with Sin. "Vina?"
    "Y-yes?"
    "Do you see them?" He asks softly. It's not how expected him to speak in this situation so it takes me off guard.
    "Yeah," I answer back. My dad shifts in place, his hands tightening around the wheel.
   "Hold on," he says with a grin. With that he presses his foot down hard on the gas, driving straight into the dead grass field while the two cars racing up to the intersection. The phone falls from my hand as I reach up to hold onto the clothing hook. He doesn't stop driving until we're on the other side of the road again heading towards the city. Looking back down the way I see the blue lights still going crazy but more than just two two cars that drove up are now parked around the police surrounding them.
    "T-they won't get in trouble with them now?" I ask my dad about the people who pulled up.
    "Some of then will probably, but Sin will have them out by sunrise," my dad assures me. The window in the back is rolled up and Idris puts his body back inside the car, tossing the gun next to him. Blood runs son his arm from underneath where his hand is covering some kind of wound that I assume is from a bullet. My dad lifts him chin up to see into the backseat. "They get you?"
   "Twice," Idris says breathless, starting to undo his shirt with his free hand. "It's just my arm though." How the heck did I hear him scream or something from being shot?
    "We're almost to Sin's; one of the nurses can fix it," my dad says. I turn my body towards the back, my eyes locked on the blood running down his arm. His face and neck are covered in sweat, long strands of hair sticking to his temples.
    "Are you okay?" I ask, wanting to jump in the back and find some way to nurse him but I don't know how to fix a bullet wound like my mom. I remember my dad jokingly telling her to teach me when I was younger but she would refuse, saying it won't ever come in handy but now I wish she would have! He forces a smile at me, nodding his head slowly.
    "Just hurts a little bit," he says, setting his shirt next to him. "This is gonna fuck up my tattoo."
    ••••••

       When we pull in front of Sin's mansion, I practically throw myself out the car. The front door opens and Sin runs out still wearing a suit that looks terribly uncomfortable. The ink from his tattoos snaking up his neck and down to his fingers somehow don't throw off the professional aura about him. I open the back passenger door for Idris before leaning against the car with my head down.
     "She must actually be your daughter after all," Sin says with a chuckle when my dad walks around the front over to me. My brows pull together in confusion. "You sound like him when you're yelling on the phone."
     "I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell at you," I say, trying not to look at him. I feel Idris lace his fingers with mine and start pulling me towards the door. My arm brushes against my dads as I let Idris tug metal away.
    Inside the house even smells luxurious like always even though there are no candles lit in sight. We walk down the long hallway to our right that are scattered with pictures of Emmy and Eve on the walls. I personally like Sin's other home much better, it's a lot smaller and has more of a familial feel to it rather than this that feels like you can get lost going to the bathroom.
Idris stops in front of a door and knocks three times before turning the knob. I follow himself to the brightly lit room with immediately turns the place into a hospital. A pale woman with honey brown eyes and blonde hair with outgrown roots stands up from a rolling chair in front of a desk. Although I've been around Sin's business for years because of my dad, I haven't met or even seen the majority of people that work for him.
"AHHH, you must be Vina!" She says excitedly, jumping up from her seat. She tries throwing her arms around me but I take a step behind Idris, my eyes wide. He just shakes his head down at her and pulls on my hand. "Sorry, I'm a hugger." She reminds of Mel, although Mel isn't this bad. "I've heard so much about you for years; never thought I'd meet you though. Idris always says he won't ever let you step foot in those house but it seems like-"
"Can you fix his arm?" I interrupt her, feeling too anxious about the bullet holes in my husbands bicep to have a conversation. She does frantically and gestures to the examination table pushed in the back of the room. She starts gathering tools from the many cabinets around the room and brings them over to the tall metal rolling table next to Idris.
He lays down on his face with his arm thrown over his chest. Blood swears all the way down his arms and there's some of his side and chest. Dark strands of his hair fall back out of his face but still some sticks to his skin from sweat. I hate to think about how good he looks right now like this even though he's literally shot. Something about the sweat glistening on his tan, tattooed skin and the blood on him sending a dangerous vibe about him.
"You can come over here or-"
"You might actually want to leave the room," Idris cuts her off to tell me, propping himself up in his good arm. I don't ask why because I can only assume the answer. Nodding, I take a slow turn out of the room. The door clicks shut behind me and I look down the way Idris and I came from. The further I walk the closer I get to the sound of my dad and Sin's voice. Idris said to stay away from him but it's not like I can do that while we're in his home.
"Idris getting his arm fixed?" My dad asks when I get close enough. I nod, fiddling my fingers in front of me. I feel Sin's eyes travel down my body, making me shift uncomfortably in place. It's still hard for me to comprehend that something happened between us; it was a quick run but I'm shocked it happened at all.
"I'm sorry about what happened tonight, Corey," He says, grabbing me out of my thoughts. "You only did what you had to do." My chest tightens with guilty at the mention of tonight's event.
"I'd rather not talk about it," I tell him. He nods, pressing his lips together. His broad shoulders relax as he lets out a deep breath, his hands reaching up to start undoing the buttons in his suit coat. The tattoos on his arms and stomach are visible underneath the white button down he wears tucked into his black pants. My face heats up realizing I'm checking him out and snap myself out of it, looking up at my dad and not daring to look towards Sin again. I love my husband with all my heart, but I can definitely still notice when someone is attractive.
"Your dad can show you to the room you and Idris can stay in tonight. It's better to stay than go home to avoid another chase," he tells me. I nod, licking my dry lips. My eyes hesitantly look back towards him just so it's not awkward. My dad places his hand on my shoulder, making me give a small jump.
"I'm gonna show her and I'll be back to sleep the calls."
••••••

After my dad showed me to the room, one the maids came in and brought a set of pajamas for me to put on. The minty, sea-foam blue color clashes with my well and thankfully somehow fits me. The silk material feels nice and the lace lining around the end of the short and hem and top of the cami top isn't itchy. It makes my stomach look bigger but I'm not complaining since I should be asleep.
Idris fell asleep quickly, the meds the nurse gave him knocking him out like a tight. He keeps his arm on his chest, the bandage wrapped tightly around his bulging bicep with little blood stain showing from under. Rolling onto my side, I brush his hair off his forehead and kiss his cheek before standing up from the comfortable bed. Despite how exhausted I felt during the day from everything that happened I can't find sleep.
     Once I'm out of the room I stop realizing I have nowhere else to go. As I said earlier this house is too spacious for me to find my way around, it would be like Dory swimming through the pipes on her own. Still though, moving around seems better than laying in bed with my thoughts.
    I can't get the image of Jason's body falling limp out of my head. Idris's mom and Aggie are probably still up trying to figure out where he is and why he's not answering them. It's because of me.
    Dim lighting comes from the end of the hall when I get closer. Turning the corner I see the lights on in the background and on top of the shove. Wrapping my arms around myself I walk towards the screen door and look out, the door cracked open a few inches.
   There's twinkly outdoor lights creating awning above the backyard, stopping at the tall trees in the back. The cold wind blows pass me, feeling good on my warm skin. I hear someone clear their throat and jump back from the window.
    "Out here," I hear Sin's voice say from outside. Pushing the door further to the side, I peak my head out to see him sitting on the grass next to the playground side. He gives me a soft smile, gesturing for me to come over with his head. Glancing back in, my shoulders tense looking at the hall that leads back to Idris. If I'm doing something that I know will make him upset, I shouldn't be doing it. "You can stay there if you want; I forgot your husband has you on a leash."
     I step outside, sliding the glass door shut quietly. The orange glow from the lights make him look like some kind of fictional creature with his perfect appearance and tattoos. "He doesn't have me on a leash..." He scuffs, pushing himself up from the ground. It's now that I notice the bottle of whiskey now laying next to his foot.
    "He technically does; he was pulling you away today before I could ask if you were okay or know what happened," he says. I put my head down, my lips pressed together. "Does the fucking asshole even know you're out of bed?"
    "No, he doesn't need to."
    "Really? He won't punish you for this?"...He suddenly chuckles, shaking his head. "Never mind, you're into that. I remember that about you."
    "Okay, sto-"
    "I know, I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't be talking to you like that," he says, starting to slur his words. He runs his hands over his face. "I'm sorry, I'm being an ass. I'm just...I'm not gonna lie, I'm buzzed-"
    "You're a little more than buzzed, Sinith."
    "Oooo, Sinith...I like hearing you call me that, Corey," he says, wiggling his eyes. My shoulders slump. He curses at himself again, slapping his hand on his face. "I'm so sorry, I did it again. You're right-You're right, I am very drunk. And I have no right to talk about how much of a diiiiicckkk I think Idris is to you just because I'm jealous."
    My brows pull together in confusion. "Why...why are you jealous?" I ask, walking closer towards him. He starts tilting to the side, nearly stumbling over before I grab his shoulders to steady him. He grabs my arms back and looks me dead in the eyes. I turn my head to the aide, automatically feeling uncomfortable.
    "Sorry..."
    "Stop saying that."
    "Sorry...OH!" He clamps his hand over his mouth, gasping at himself. I can't help but giggle. "I-I'm jealous because...because he has you a-and I don't. It's hard to see since we were doing fine wh-when we were together and I-I really liked you. I just still wish it could have worked out, you know?"
    My fingers tap against my thighs as I bring myself down to one of the swings. "I'm sorry..."
    "You're not though, you're happy with Idris and I can see that. You love him more than you could have loved me," he says, shrugging his shoulders. His words hit hard, his drunk words speaking the truth. "I'm sorry I'm saying all of this."
   "It's okay," I tell him. He sits down on the ground next to my legs.
"It's just... You have no idea how panicked I was hearing you of all people call me asking for back up?! I was way too fucking worried then when you got here I wanted to know if you were at least okay and he was pulling you away...I wanted so badly to shoot him in the head but I can't cause that's not my place."
     I should have stayed in bed. "I was almost raped and killed the guy with a pocket knife," I tell him, giving him the explanation he was looking for earlier even though my dad probably went over everything with him already. "I'm still alive, so I'm okay."
    He drunkenly grabs the whiskey bottle, pulling the cap off with a loud pop. "His first mistake was letting you wear that, second was letting you go to restroom alone-"
     "He lets me dress as I please because it's my body...sometimes," I say, my eyes trailing off to the side fence. Idris is protective in that way but he's never been crazy about it. "And it's not like he could have known that was going to happen...He's the one who makes me carry a knife in the first place."
    "You shouldn't be the one having to k-"
    "I thought you said you would stop talking shit about him to me," I say, getting annoyed. It's not Idris's fault at all what happened. He sighs, taking a swing of the alcohol. A few minutes of silence pass between us. It's comfortable but tension filled at the same time.
    "...How are you really?" He asks. My eyes snap down to him. "You just killed someone for the first time...I know how hard that is. There's no way you're perfectly fine." My chest tightens with emotional. All the guilt and then the fear I felt earlier swims back to the surface in a recap of all that went on today. Tears cloud my vision before they slowly start to spill.
   "It's been a hard day," I say, my voice shaking. He lifts his chin, turning his body a little to face me better. "I-Idris wouldn't be happy with me if I talked to you about this stuff," I tell him honestly. His jaw clenches but he just shrugs.
    "He doesn't need to know; I'm just being your friend," he says. I reach your and wipe my tears with the side of my hand, sniffling through my nose. Starting from beginning, everything starts coming out before I can overthink. He nods along with what I say, brows drawn together in concentration. By the end of my venting session my face is streaked with tears.
    "I feel guilty for everything," I tell him, my voice shaking like a building during an earthquake. "Idris and my doctor have told me that what's going on with the baby isn't my fault but it's my body, it's impossible for me to feel like it isn't. And Jason...I know I did the right thing but I can't imagine how his wife and daughter must feel. It's because of me they'll never have him back."
   "But it's because of him that you had to do that," he tells me in a strict tone. "I'm sorry, but in my my eyes any man who'll touch a woman or anyone for that matter without consent deserves to be killed. I know I've never been the most respectful to women, but I regret all of that now that I have my daughters...if someone tried touching them I'd kill the son of bitch with much worse than a pocket knife...You're still considered a saint in my eyes." I let out a short laugh, the corners of my mouth lifting into a small smile. "The first time I killed someone I didn't like it; I couldn't sleep that night or the next...for about a week actually I couldn't sleep. My childhood was messy, I was raised by my uncle who I called dad but my actual dad was in the picture when I was younger, he was around and taught me how he ran things around here."
    "Here as in...mafia here?" I ask, my eyes squinting. Nodding, he brushes his hair back with his fingers. He leans his head back against the slide.
    "I don't remember how old I was...I walked into the living room one of the very few night's I'd stay with him and he had someone knelt down at his feet waiting to be shot. I heard the crying and went to see what was happening...When he seen me there he didn't tell me to leave, he asked me to do it for him cause his hand was too shaky..." There's a short pause, Sin staring off into space lost in thought. 
   "I-I'm sorry," I stutter, imagining the scene unfolding in front of me. He shrugs, looking at the almost empty bottle in front of him.
   "It's okay, it set me up for my future well. It haunted me for a while though," he says, taking a drink. "You though...you're tougher than I was at whatever age I was at the time, I'm too drunk to remember. It just takes a minute for everything to settle then you just move on." My lips press together. He tosses the empty bottle, letting out a dramatic sigh. "As for the pregnancy, that's the last thing you should blame yourself for. You just have to be easy on yourself. I've obviously never experienced it myself but I know it takes a strong women to do it and you're holding yourself together the best you can. It's only your job to take care of the parts of yourself that you can control, everything else isn't your fault. There's no promises with it, but you're gonna get through this and see it's worth it once you hold that baby girl."
    My brows raise in surprise. "Girl? Everything keeps saying girl, I don't think it is." He smiles, eyes dropping to my stomach.
    "It's just a hunch...whatever it is, it's lucky as hell to have a mom like you." Everything falls quiet again. Looking up at the stars a soft wind blows, my hair flowing to my back. Being in the outskirts of town with nothing to take away from the stars they're more beautiful than ever. No many light up the sky, broken up around the dark blue sky.
Sin slides down the grass until he's laying on his back and pats the spot next to him. I raise my brows in question. "Lay down and look at the stars. You can see them better," he says. I look towards the door to make sure no ones coming or looking before getting onto the cold grass and laying beside him. Looking up through the strands of stringed lights at the stars my eyes finally start to feel heavy again. It felt nice to get everything off my chest and express how I really feel, I just wish it hadn't been with Sin. However, something about him makes it easy for me to talk to him.
     "Can I ask you something now?" I ask Sin, turning my head to the side to look at him. My hands lay flat on my stomach. The wind blows light stands of my black hair that's sprawled around my head on top of the grass. He nods, sliding a hand behind his head. "Why are you drinking tonight?" I understand that some people like to drink for fun, like my dad and Alaric for example, but Sin has told me before that he has come to not like who is with alcohol in his system.
    "Now that, Corey, is a good question," he says, looking at me for a split second. "I don't have the girls tonight so I was planning to work because I don't want to be at that house alone, however, knowing you're inside the room right across from me sleeping with your husband...it was pretty difficult to focus, so I gave up. I usually keep my myself busy with Emmy and Eve but they're with their momma and her new boyfriend...."
    "She's seeing people again?" I ask. He nods, shrugging.
   "I don't care about that part, her legs can be open for whoever the hell she wants now, it's the bringing them into our children's lives part that bothers me," he says, placing his hand on his chest. It seems we're going back and forth with the venting.
   "How do you feel about her still being close with Emmy?" To this his jaw clenches and he turns his head towards me.
   "As selfish as it is, I hate it. By law Emmy is mine, only mine and I intend to keep it as so. I don't want to have to share her with someone who has no right to her...but I also can't hurt Emmy by removing Davina from her life. And going back to the boyfriend thing-"
    "You brought me around the girls," I interrupt, calling out his hypocrisy. "That's the same thing."
    "No, because that was never on purpose and you were already around. Regardless you came around because Idris and your family; and they didn't even know we were together. She's been on one date with this man and now he's around my kids; I'm not fucking comfortable with that."   
    The more he goes on the more upset he begins to sound. The curve of his brow becomes more pronounced as they arch together. "Maybe try telling her that when you pick them up," I suggest. It's a weak suggestion but I don't have much else to offer. "You're a great dad, just do what you think is right."
    The corner of his mouth lifts into a smile. "Thank you, I try. I feel like Eve hates me though." I shake my head.
   "She can't hate you, even if she's mad at you she can't hate you. She goes through a lot experiencing the back and forth; trust me, I know how it feels. It bothered me so much, but more than maybe it would some other people. Emmy needs stability."
"I'm trying to give her that, but it never works out long term."
"One things certain, your a good dad. You always have been," I tell him. His cheeks flush a light shade of pink that's still visible in the orange dim lighting. "She's going to love you regardless, so is Eve. Just keep them out of Davvy and your problems."
Crickets start making noise somewhere around the backyard. The breeze starting to get harder, the swing starting to sway slightly with the wind.
"Do you still have feelings left for Davvy?" I ask, the question digging in my mind. He shakes his head.
"No," he answers easily. "Her and I weren't good for each other, we were good lessons for each other. She deserves better than me and she eventually started to see that." He says everything in all seriousness. It amazes me how when he lets his guard down he's so soft. The scary mafia boss is insecure and more vulnerable than he lets on.
"You made mistakes but everyone does, from my experience I think you learned from yours," I tell him. His chest sinks as he lets out a long breath. Propping himself up on his forearm and elbow he leans forward and presses his lips to mine. By instinct I push him away, scooting with wide eyes. Standing up, I bring by hand up to my mouth.
Sin stands as well, cleaning himself off with his hands. "I-I'm sorry, I'm still drunk," he says, rubbing his eyes. "That was so stupid. You're going through enough and-"
"I-It's fine," I say, cutting him off. It feels like my body is low on fire but not in the way it used to get when he kissed me a few months ago. "I'm gonna go back to sleep now," I tell him, clasping my hands together in front of me.
"Corey-"
"Goodnight," I say, tucking my hair behind my ear as I start speed walking to the door with my head down. Just as I reach it Val steps into view, sliding it open. As if it's my father standing in front of me I stop in my tracks with a quiet gasp. Looking down at me, he raises his brows. I'm surprised he's here so late since Melissa isn't here with him. "I'm going to bed."
"Is Idris still here with you?" He asks. His English is getting better each time we see each other. I nod, swallowing down the nervous lump in my throat. I can feel myself start to sweat from nervousness.
"Can I go to bed now?" I ask. He nods, stepping to the side and gesturing with his hand for to step past him. I mumble a goodnight on the way inside, my feet patting against the wooden forcing on the way towards the hallway. Val must have turned on a few of the lights because it's a lot bright than it was when I was leaving the room.
I carefully open the door, not letting go of the knob until it's closed to avoid any clicking. Idris isn't a light sleeper but I don't want to take my chances now. Moving the blankets I slide into bed and cover myself, turning onto my side and cuddling into Idris the best I can without hurting him. His comforting, protective scent invaded my scenes and I feel myself start to relax. Shifting in his sleep, he tried wrapping his arm around my shoulders to tug me closer but winces. His brows pull together in pain but he doesn't wake. I do the job for him instead, kissing the small tattoo on the bottom of his neck.
This has been one hell of a day.

AN: FINALLY AN UPDATE!!! Hopefully the lengths and all the events in this made the wait worth it though🤣 I apologize for all the "update today!" plans that I couldn't follow through with, I would get close to being done with the chapter but would start hurting and ended up wanting to redo and add a few things so it took a lot longer than I was expecting. There are only a few chapters left of this so there will be an announcement tomorrow on my writing instagram: vaehwrites about the next story in the Florencio Series (it's not Cass's, there was a change in inspiration)!! Also, sorry for how many typos there probably are in this but oh well, I wanted to get it up regardless🤪 I really hope you guys enjoyed! Believe in yourself -Vaeh
Question: How do you think the rest of Vina's pregnancy will go?

All images found on Pinterest and Google