Another Dursley

Last Hope.

It wasn't easy.

Having to deal with what came after those three days of fixing up the castles surrounded by others who were so happy and joyful to be free had been enough to keep us together- but everything came crashing down when we had to actually have funerals. The Burrow exploded with emotion that day when we came back from Hogwarts after George, Lee Jordan, Angelina Johnson and I took to sending Fred off in a way he would enjoy-  Weasleys Wizard Wheezes biggest firework display we could ever cook up.

That wasn't what caused everything to blow over everyone quite enjoyed it- They cried as every name of the fallen of war were written across the starry sky, each House in spits of their tears cheered for their fallen; Gryffindor House roared louder than I had ever heard for Fred Weasley. It wasn't until everyone squished themselves in the small kitchen of the burrow determined to celebrate the life of those we buried that day by sharing memories- the mood was gravely somber as the permanent absence of Fred, Remus and Tonks settled heavily on everyone, after the official good-bye of their funeral, it wasn't until many occupants of the kitchen bid their farewell for the night that in a drunken state Percy shared Fred's last moments in the war with everyone and in a raging drunk grief George went after Percy shouting 'Why didn't you save him?', at least that's what I heard what happened, and now George would not come out of their bedroom even after the attempts of every Weasley, Harry, Hermione, Lee Jordan, Angelina Johnson or even mine.

The Burrow was silent; dead of life for the first time.

Mrs. Weasley was getting desperate to see him going as far as threatening to blow the door down if he continued to refuse to eat. All the Weasley's attempted to get through to George in their own grief sitting outside his door; but George couldn't stand the sad looks they gave him- it reminded him more than the gaping hole in his chest of what was missing.

To allow the Weasleys some space; Hermione, Harry, and I had been going back and forth from the burrow to Hogwarts in the past week as it served as refugee for all those who had been affected by the war and to locate the missing- it was being run by Hogwarts staff, The order and Dumbledore's Army.

It was a good distraction and a good use of my healing skills because St. Mungos had reached capacity It was enough time of a distraction for Harry to decide to get an apartment with Hermione and I. He felt that if we left the Weasley's some space they would be able to heal. Hermione thought it was a great idea- I had no opinion on the matter Harry dragged me along seeing as I hardly spoke only time I did was when I sat outside George's door as I was the only one who could get him to eat or to just share some good news- It was too painful to speak but it was the best way to keep myself put together.

I didn't speak a word even as Harry and Hermione carried our things out of the burrow and Ron was right there carrying his stuff out with them and Mrs. Weasley was bawling her eyes out once again, begging us- begging him to stay.

I sat on the stairs watching the scene unfold, Ron was saying to his mother that distance from the burrow could do everyone some good, that he needed his own time to heal- that we would be back every day and there would be no difference. Yet Mrs. Weasley wept gripping onto her son, not wanting to lose another.

I thought about what Ron said as he comforted his mother, tears slipping down his own face as his siblings all begged him to think through it and not act so hastily.

I stood up and walked up the steps and knocked on the door, it was met with silence.

"Georgie, please open the door."I croaked, my voice being very unused for a week came out hoarse but it seemed to be enough for him to open the door.

He looked at me from the crack, pain writtled on his face as he heard the commotion downstairs trying to peak over me and see what was going on.

"You're leaving?"His voice was the same as mine, but it sounded so tired.

"We both are."I said shaking my head.

He looked at me confused but I squeezed into the room, I paused for a second to see all the tissues and the only three boxes that they had left were exploded across the bedroom. The bed that once belonged to George was neatly made- but the one that belonged to Fred was messy and filled with tissues.

I turned towards my bag that sat in there from the moment he refused to let even me in and began to stuff it with both of our things, he stood there watching me unsure of what to say or do, he only clutched Fred's clock hand that Mr. Weasley had given him the day we arrived and he found that it had fallen off the clock...

"Why?"He said after a while.

"..Because it's too painful."I told him truthfully,"For you to be here... for now... we'll come back every day... or every few days...  just for a few hours... until its bearable for you- then you can decided to do what you want."

"But mum-"

"You have to heal, George."I said sharply turning to face him,"You have to... live... you can't just stay in here."

"I don't want to heal."He shook his head, tears brimming his eyes and he clutched Fred's hand raising his voice,"I don't want to forget him!"

"I'm not asking you to."I said tearfully,"I'm asking you to take care of yourself- What do you think fred would say to you if he saw you like this?"

He stayed silent, looking at the tears brimming my eye; no matter how much I held them back.

"Answer me, George."

"... That i'm no different than a mountain troll..."George said in a whisper, looking around the bombarded room.

"Too right he would."I whispered, ignoring the jabbing pain in my heart,"I'm not trying to fix you, George... I'm not trying to make you forget... "

"You're trying to make it easier."George whispered, tears falling from his eyes looking down at Fred's hand,"... It will never get easier- your wasting your time- just leave."

My heart thudded painfully at his words as I looked at him in disbelief, that he would think I would leave him when he was hurting.

I sighed but rummaged through my bag quickly to pull out the necklace he had given me years ago, I tossed the charm into my bag and walked over to him with the chain, taking the hand from him without asking and looped it through the chain before holding it back out to him.

"I can't make it easier, I can't fix this, I can't take away your pain... no matter how much I wish I could... but I can help you feel more than just pain."I said to him, and decided to place the necklace around his neck for him,"I am not leaving you. Not now- not ever; we're in this together."

"I have Remus with me..."I said holding my necklace,"Every day... so you have Fred with you everyday."

It took him a minute as he gripped Fred's hand hanging from his neck but he said,"I know where I want to go."

I looked at him surprised but nodded,"Then we'll go there."

"The shop."

My heart stopped looking at him, it was far too soon... for both of us.

"When?"I asked, clearing my throat.

"Two weeks."He said nodding,"... we'll do what you said... make it bearable first."

I hadn't expected him to say that. I thought we would argue and he would make me stay, but as we walked down the steps hand in hand the commotion stopped and everyone looked our way, the looks of pain flashed across their faces without their consent upon seeing George, and he gripped my hand tightly as if to keep him from running back up the steps.

"Are you sure?"Mrs. Weasley asked me after a moment of silence.

"We're sure."I nodded.

All the Weasleys backed away from Ron and took to greeting George and giving him words of love and comfort as we made to leave the burrow, they all hugged him but George would not let go of my hand, as if to use me as an anchor until we left for our new home.

Silence filled the new apartment as George looked around curiously, but I led him to what would be our bedroom. We set up our new life quietly. I was able to get George to go out with me to Muggle shops to distract ourselves, we clinged onto each other and George even asked if we could put off going to the Burrow for a while.

It wasn't the happiest but we weren't crying ourselves to sleep separately every night. I got to hold George every single night when he woke up crying or just because I wanted to- I was able to make his lips twitch to a slight smile for a second every once in a while, and though his eyes didn't shine with life- he was making an effort and that was enough.

We had came home from buying new room decorations as I often took him out to visit muggle shops as a sort of distraction for the both of us and we were working on setting them up with music playing faintly in the background, we both found it made it feel less lonely, before Ron knocked at our door, causing us to look up.

"Can I have a word with you, Eli?"He asked.

"Um... sure."I looked back at George,"Can you set these up, love?"

George nodded looking away from us and I followed Ron out of the room, closing the door behind me to see Hermione and Harry waiting for us in the living room, watching us not knowing what was about to come.

"Was it his choice or yours to move out?"Ron asked me, clear anger written on his face.

"At first it was mine-"

"I knew it! You can't go off making decisions for him-"

"He's my boyfriend, Ronald."I said defensively.

"He's my brother, Elizabeth."He snapped,"You can't just keep him all to yourself. My family need him, you know- Mum hasn't seen him in almost a week."

"He needed to get out of there- just as well as you did."I snapped, angry that we would think I would do something so selfish,"He wanted to stop going-"

"Or was it you who decided to stop going?"He seethed,"You've been keeping hims to yourself- You haven't even been helping with the DA anymore- and might I remind you- you have a pack of werewolves on your ass but you're both never home- do you want him to get killed?"

"Ron."Harry and Hermione exclaimed in shock.

"No, no."I held a hand out to Harry and Hermione,"Go on then, tell me how you want me to stay away from your family then- tell me how you partially blame me for what happened at the burrow-"

"It was your fault! You weren't there when it happened!"

"Because I was with Teddy!"I exclaimed in disbelief,"I was helping Andromeda as she asked- she just lost her daughter and her husband, she can't raise a child on her own."

"It couldn't have waited? I had to pull George away from hexing Percy and we haven't from percy in two weeks."

"She was a wreck, she could barely stand- and that wasn't my fault, Ronald."I said angrily,"They were drunk- emotions were high- we just came back from the ceremony-"

"But you could've prevented it- you could've gotten through to George- but you chose to leave."He spat,"Now my family is falling apart but you're making him distance himself."

I looked at Ron in disbelief,"How are you blaming me? What do you want me to do? Do you want me to leave that bad?"

Harry and Hermione shot up from their seats in protest but Ron stopped them,"No I don't- I... I  just  want to understand why you're taking George away from us- why now?"

Silence filled the air as Ron and I looked at each other with anger and hurt, Harry and Hermione watched us not knowing what to do afraid if they spoke it would defuse the situation.

"I  would never take him away, Ron..."I said truthfully,"I would never do anything to hurt your family... He's in pain, Ron. George is his own person- his actions fall on him not on me- but he's trying, he really is... I've spoken to him about Percy... and I've spoken to Percy about George... I don't think either of them are ready to face each other... not now... but George doesn't blame him anymore- he blamed all of us that's why he wouldn't come out of the bedroom... he couldn't face us- but now he knows it's the Deatheaters and Voldemort at fault alone... we couldn't have done anything... no matter how much we tried."

There was a silence at the explanation I had given, nobody had heard what George had thought except for me. He hadn't confided or spoken to anyone long enough not even Lee Jordan who visited him every four days, but at night he would pour his heart and I would listen- I wasn't keeping him away and even though I was selfish once or twice with him- I never ever made decisions for him... I only nudged him and held his hand to take lead if he found the first step too hard to take... George had never been alone in his whole life... it was difficult for him and although I would never be what Fred was... I could still be there so he wouldn't feel so lonely.

"I leave tomorrow..."I said to them after a moment of silence.

They all looked at me concerned as if what Ron had said to me had been enough to drive me out but I continued,"The full moon is coming up."

They looked at each other knowing it was the first one out of many that I would have to endure without Remus, by looks in their faces they were thinking if I would be able to handle it.

"You can try taking him to the burrow... he should try going without me... it's better than being here alone... ."I told them truthfully.

"What do you mean you're leaving tomorrow- you have time?"Harry asked concerned.

"The moon isn't until four days from now but I can feel it already taking it's toll... I wanted to stay with George until the day of... but I'm afraid of... I've managed to be the one who keeps us moving forward as of now... but I'm scared I'll ruin the progress he's made if he has to deal with my wolf... who has yet to grieve."I looked down.

"What does that mean your wolf hasn't grieved? Aren't you one?"Hermione asked curiously as crookshanks passed by my leg announcing his presence.

"In a way yes... but I have my soul... and the I have my wolf's spirit."I explained to them,"It's the curse... the one no werewolf has been able to control... but they become tame in a way if they don't feel lonely or pain... which is difficult to achieve... but if they have a pack... it follows... It feels free among its own... which I've lost."

"You have us."Ron said after a moment of silence, hoping after his emotional outburst I wouldn't think he hates me or wants me gone for good.

I nodded gently and said with great difficulty,"I know that... but Remus... was my pack."

I couldn't continue explaining as George came out of our bedroom to look for me, he quietly looked on at all of us curios as to why I was taking too long.

"Georgie..."I said and looked at Ron,"... we've got to have a word."

Ron gave me pleading eyes to not share what happened as George followed me into our bedroom, we sat down on our bed and I hugged my legs to my chest as we sat across from each other, George looked at me as if he was expecting for me to say something horrible as if he was bracing his heart for more pain.

"Are you alright?"He asked quietly.

"...the moon is coming up."I answered quietly.

"You have four days."He shook his head, knowingly.

"Yes, but the cycle began two days ago."I admitted,"I have to find somewhere to go... and prepare..."

"I can help you..."

"I have to do this on my own."I looked down but looked back up at him,"But...Ron wants to take you to see your mum."

"I.. no."He shook his head, pain struck my heart at the fear in his eyes,"I can't stand the way they look at me. No."

"You've got to give them a chance, Georgie."I begged him as I had many times before,"You need to be with them..."

"I feel ashamed... I ruined that day.."

"I should've stayed... it was my mistake."I said remembering Ron's words.

"No- Andromeda needed you. Teddy needed you."He shook his head, remembering how shaken she had been after the funeral that Harry and Hermione had to hold Teddy for most of the ceremony- she had even almost handed off Teddy to Hagrid who wanted a look 'at the lil bugger'- we were unsure she would be able to apparate home in one piece with Teddy and so George said I should help as I would not let go of Teddy once I got my hands on him.

"I got too drunk... I thought it would help with the pain... having to listen to all those memories only made it worse... what percy said... it-it was too much.."George shook his head, voice breaking

"Shh, You don't have to explain it to me, love."I said scooting closer to him wrapping my arms around him placing warm kisses on his cheek,"Pain makes people do terrible things in moments when they're not fully themselves... You have nothing to be ashamed of... everyone's done things they're not proud of... but come on- You're George Weasley- when were you ever the type to give up so easily."

He leaned into my embrace,"Can you say that again- I didn't hear you clearly you're on the wrong side-"

I couldn't help but chuckle making him look at me,"What's so funny?"

"Nothing."I shook my head trying to look away as a sudden case of unwanted giggles over came me, it felt inappropriate to laugh but I couldn't stop myself.

"There you go again, what could possibly be so funny about my ear?"He pulled me back as I tried to escape to the bathroom, watching me with a glint of amusement.

I couldn't fight my laugh tears brimmed my eyes they were the cause of a mix of pain and laughter as a smile played on his lips,"Go on share with me."

"It's just..."I giggled,"you haven't said anything about your ear in a while..."

"I thought you found those unb-ear-able?"He asked a smile appeared on his lips when I laughed.

"I find them ear-risistable."I said and he pulled a face but a laugh of amusement escaped him,"That's your best?"

"It was funny."I retorted with a laugh.

"Pathetic."He smiled.

"You laughed."

We stopped for a moment looking at each other as the silence thickened the air once again announcing a missing presence and our momentary smiles slipped back to the sadness that has become so natural to our faces and I sat up straight as he turned away from me, heaviness on his shoulders. It was the first time we had ever had a moment like this and I think we both felt just as guilty... to laugh without Fred... it felt like we were committing a crime... it only made his absence feel heavier than at night when we wouldn't hear his snores like before... when we would stay awake and chat besides him.

"I'll be back as soon as I can."I said above the heaviness of the silence,"...you should go with them... they miss you, George."

The next day I got ready to leave, George watched me building up courage to speak, it wasn't until I packed the final pair of shoes that he spoke.

"I decided to go."

I looked up at him, feeling proud of him,"Good... that's good, love..."

"You're gonna be in pain aren't you?"George asked me as I turned to change my shirt,"Without Remus..."

I couldn't answer him at first as I pulled on the new shirt, feeling I could break at the mention of Remus but pulled myself together to speak naturally,"Of course... but one step at a time... right?"

I felt him wrap his arms around me and bury his head on my shoulder, wanting to fill me with his warmth not being blind to my pain,"Do you have to go alone?"

"It's too dangerous."I said gently, trying not to crumble in his embrace.

"What about Zabini?"

"I haven't spoken to him since..."I trailed off shaking my head,"I'm not his problem anymore."

"...but he's your friend."

I stayed silent, I did think about reaching out to Blaise but I imagined seeing as it was all over he was gonna move on... build his new life... I didn't want to burden that.

"I've got to be alone this time.."I said holding his hands that were wrapped around my waist,"it'll come whether I want it to or not... best I make that step to deal with it on my own."

He didn't say another word knowing my mind was made but allowed me to lead him out of our bedroom to where Harry, Ron and Hermione waited for us by the door. Harry wrapped his arms around me when I reached him,"You'll be alright... we'll be waiting for you to come back."

I smiled softly as we pulled away and Hermione followed then Ron who whispered,"I'm sorry about the other day... I was upset..."

"It's okay... you've been so strong, Ron..."I rubbed his back.

"I'll take care of him till you get back."He promised.

"Thank you.."

We pulled away and I didn't let go of George until we had to apparate going different directions to prevent splinching, with one final look  wishing I could stay by his side I turned on my heel with the thought of Remus' cottage in Yorkshire.

I thought I would be able to hide away there but when my feet touched the ground and I was faced with the little tumbledown, semi-derelict cottage- my heart just couldn't bare it, but I went in anyways.

It was slightly barren, Remus hadn't occupied it unless there was a full moon... He and Tonks took refuge with her parents near the end. Memories flooded and wrapped my heart in spikes with every step I took as the two men I had spent so much time here with were both gone.

I tossed my bag aside and plopped down on the sofa listening to the silence of the abandoned cottage. The silence felt so thick and suffocating and it alone filled me with sorrow that spewed out in tears.

I laid down closing my eyes, taking in the scent of Remus that remained in these walls and a sob overcame me clutching the blanket that he left behind- that he once covered me with when I would fall asleep besides him and sirius.

It wasn't easy.

As the days went on I crumbled nearly to dust; I was erratic with emotions, I didn't bother to eat and no matter what I did or where I was I would break down. If I was in the shower, in my old bedroom upstairs that still remained, or i'd wake up crying not even known why- the most embarrassing and overwhelming one was when I walked all the way down the long road to the muggle shop for toothpaste and something to drink.

"Don't I know you from somewhere?"The shopkeeper asked.

"Doubt it."

"No, no- that's right, You're that young chaps kid."He said with a cheerful smile scanning my objects.

"I think you've got the wrong person."I shook my head.

"Your dad lives just a walk down that long road, don't he? That run down cottage?"He asked and by the shocked look on my face he confirmed,"Right-o, I knew it! That's where I know you from- you came in with that dog last time! Why didn't you bring him along? How is your old man? Haven't seen him around here for a while."

"He died."I said without conscious thought, my heart was numb over with pain and I could my eyes gloss over with sorrow.

"Oh... I'm so sorry to hear that."The joy erased from the shop keepers face,"What happened?"

"...I-I... He.. was..."I was becoming overwhelmed with emotions as the memories flooded back and I turned around,"Just keep the stuff."

"Wait! Don't go! I'm sorry! Please!"

I didn't listen I ran down the road sobbing my eyes out, the wind pricked my lungs but I did not stop until I reached the cottage and was certain I was to never ever emerge from it ever again until I needed to leave. And I didn't not even when the moon came around, though I tried- but my wolf seemed adamant in staying here. I was lucky that Remus' cottage was furthest from the center muggle village or else my screams of pain and sorrow would've been heard.

My mind went blank, my heart burned as I laid in the ruins of my bedroom that endured my agony- not because of the way my body was being warped by the monster within but by the open wound in my heart. The sobs would not stop that it hurt to even breathe and I refused to look up as footsteps filled the room and I screamed to keep from hearing the voices I longed to hear but was too afraid to face.

"You could've saved them."My wolf screamed over me enraged,"Now all I feel is pain!"

"YOU'RE NOT REAL- YOU'RE AN ILLUSION- THIS IS MY PAIN."

"IT HURTS AND IT'S YOUR FAULT!"

"IT HURTS- IT HURST."I cried desperately into my arms, only my aching sobs remained.

"Come on, cheer up- no point in crying all day, now is there?"

I froze, my cries falling to a mere whimper and I forced myself to keep my head down.

"Her pain is intensified- she can't help it."

"She won't even look at us?"

I looked up knowing I shouldn't but my heart burned to see what it yearned, there they were the only three left in the room with my wolf who was silent watching me as I stumbled to my feet,"A-Ally... R-remus... F-freddie..."

"About time you look at us."

"What's wrong? Seems like you've seen a ghost?"

"But we're not ghost."Remus said to Fred and Ally as they casually sat on my bed as if this was any other day to them,"Merely fragments of guilt and pain to remind her of her humanity."

"So ghosts?"Fred said then waved his arms eerily at me,"OOOOH IM A GHOOOST- oh no don't cry you're not supposed to cry."

"Now look what you've done- you've made her all sad."Ally nudged Fred.

"Why them?"I spat at my wolf standing walking to her,"Why?"

"You want them here."She said not flinching as I glared at her,"Because it hurts."

I nodded tears brimming  my eyes,"It does hurt..."

"You're the only real thing here, Eli."Remus said.

"You can make it go away."My wolf said,"For the both of us...all the pain... forever."

"I don't trust red-eye eli."Fred pipped in, but it only pained me to hear him knowing it wasn't real- why did I want them here? I understood pain kept me in touch with my humanity but this was too much- far too much... I knew why I kept the others... because they reminded me of the monster I'd become- Cedric was the one to remind me of everyone else... it wasn't because of guilt- it was of pain... but with Ally, Remus and Fred it was both... but it wasn't just me who could control them... she could as well.

"It hurts."I told remus tearfully,"everything hurts..."

"The moon is almost up."was all he said to me.

"Remus... make it stop."I cried out desperately.

"Look at the moon."

I shook my head sobs overcoming me and I fell on all fours, my limbs no longer being able to stand smacking the ground in frustration,"NO-NO I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE FUCKING MOON- I WANT YOU! I WANT ALL OF YOU! I WANT THE PAIN TO STOP! I WANT IT ALL TO JUST STOP!"

My sobs and screams of agony filled the room as I held my head, as if it would keep me together as the moon was starting to reach its peak and my body felt pain but it was no worse than the one my heart felt.

"Look at the moon."

"Remus..."i sobbed looking at him,"Make it stop... make it stop, Freddie."

But none of them moved towards me as I begged them hopelessly, they only watched because they weren't real... they weren't here.

"Do you want to make it stop?"The manifestation of myself with red eyes stood over me as I wishing the three people sitting before me would come to life but the sat blankly watching me wither in pain.

"Y-yes."

I rolled on my back looking up knowing I was alone in this bedroom... It was only me here, the cold breeze of the empty room shivered down my spine.

I looked up at the skylight where the full moon shined through, feeling my heart slowly become cold putting out the burning fire of pain and with a deep sigh of relief that reached every inch of my chest- I shut my eyes and allowed myself to succumb to the darkness without a fight.

My eyes flashed open the next day blinded by the light for a second I believed I was in the comfort of the cottage but shooting up at the sound of cars I came to realize I was half way across from the muggle village hidden in the bushes. Panic rose through me as I saw the blood that covered my naked body.  I looked around to see if anyone had seen me and I turned running the opposite direction, back towards the cottage ignoring the excruciating pain my body was in, trying to piece together what had happened but could only draw a blank- the only thing I remember was the full moon that shined against me at nightfall.

I stumbled into the cottage and ran into the bathroom to hurl and by scent alone I was able to tell how many animals I had killed that night, but I was grateful to not have eaten a single human. I downed a potion I was testing out to see if it would settle my stomach without the taste of goblin's piss, and went to brush my teeth but jumped back screaming in shock nearly falling into the tub. My eyes were bright red- my hair was pale white my skin looked pale but I didn't know if it was just from the moon. I pulled at my hair believing this had to be a joke, I hadn't dyed my hair since last year. My only thought was that the potion might've back-fired- that maybe the ingredients reacted horribly with each other or with me but that didn't explain my red-eyes. Shaking terrified and emotional still- I showered and tended to my wounds wracking my brain to how this potion could've done this or if I had done something last night to cause this.

I couldn't piece anything together and still my eyes remained red hours later. Panic rose through me and I did the only thing I thought I could and chopped some of it off hoping it would return to its natural color- but it stayed white- it was stupid theory but I had to do something. I tried everything- I even went out to buy dye (with sunglasses on) but the color simply washed off.

I couldn't go home this way. It was too much to explain when I understood so little. So I went to the nearest wizard village to send an owl to the one person that could understand this and waited in the cottage drinking a bottle butterbeer until there was knock on the door.

I rushed to open it,"Thank god, Blaise- you have to fix this."

"Woah."was all that came out of him.

"I know- stop it. stop looking at me like that."

"Its freaky-"

"Just fix me!"

"Okay, Okay- You think the potion caused this?"He asked as he examined the bottle that held the bit of potion left, smelling it to see what could've gone wrong, if i wasn't out of my mind I would've been able to do it but I couldn't form a single simple thought.

"There's no other explanation."

"What happened during the moon?"He asked as if that was the solution.

"If I could be conscious of my actions it wouldn't much of a problem now would it."I spat angrily.

"Okay, well the hair I can fix... you added a mixture of two ingredients that can take away pigmentation- those eyes on the other hand; I have no idea."

"Oh no yeah thanks- how am I supposed to go home with red eyes?"I shouted and began to pace impatiently my head running wild with scenarios that would unfold if I went home looking like a monster.

"Did you... see anyone?"

I turned to Blaise in confusion,"What do you mean?"

"Draco said-"

"You've been speaking to Draco?"I cut him off.

"He wanted to make amends... we were friends for years, Eli and Goyle is a mess-"

"Whatever that's your life."I shook my head turning around not wanting to allow myself to fill my life with more pain,"I won't hold it against you as long as it's not Pansy."

"Well..."

"You're talking to Pansy?"

"Technically she's speaking to me- she's been reaching out to everyone..."

"I don't care, okay? I don't care. That's in the past- they're all in the past-It's your life- I just want to fix this so I can go home to my boyfriend, okay? That's all I want. I just want this gone."I said frustrated and sat down on the sofa that had a big slash in it,"I just want this to all go away."

"...Draco said you were mumbling a lot at the manor..."Blaise started.

"I was probably loopy from all the torture- he would know he saw it."I spat covering my face, feeling a headache coming on.

"No don't you get it- you said every time you lose yourself something happens... you said you turned here but ended up outside- you don't think you might've killed some-"

"No."I snapped,"No, I didn't kill anyone just animals- I can't have killed anyone I would know- the taste.... the taste is different- makes me sick for weeks."

"What about other werewolves...?"

I stopped thinking about it but I shook my head,"I would remember... and nobody knows where I am..."

"You don't remember anything... you never do- why didn't you owl me before the moon I would've came- I would've helped you."

"Because I would've killed you!"I said truthfully as flashes of the bloody night before came to mind,"It's been so long since my wolf could run free and in grief... it's lethal... You would've been dead the second the moon went up."

"You know I've read a lot about the Wolf Spirit-"

"Yeah I know, I told you about it- the part of me that makes me insane-"

"I didn't mean what it is but what it's done to other werewolves... It can use your pain to make you give in to closing off your humanity so it can run free every full moon- sort of like Greyback... except he has no heart... It said that without a hold of humanity; every cycle would take toll without remorse it would be like seven days of the full moon but only one you'll transition- it would even cause trouble in everyday life-  there's this theory that depending which type of werewolf you are can make your wolf spirit more powerful to tamper with your soul like it did with Fenrir- his eyes you said they're yellow but yours are red... That has to mean something - i think-  i don't know what any of that werewolf jumbo means... but you've told us about those hallucinations you get sometimes... what if this time it used... Professor Lupin... Fred... maybe even Ally?"

I stayed quiet pondering for a moment,"Them alone would make me want to give in... but I was strong enough to fight it off before... "

"but you've lost so much now... and that pain is intensified by hundreds... in order for your wolf to feel free it would have to take that away."

"But... I can still feel the pain... I can still feel it. She didn't take it away."I shook my head,"I'm not like Fenrir."

"I know you're not... but I think she gave some back before..."He said examining me closely,"Your teeth... they're normal... your humanity isn't lost yet... she hasn't been able to touch your soul."

"B-but my eyes... they can't stay red... I don't care what they mean- they're ugly."

"Are you sure nobody knew where you were?"Blaise asked his eyes on something behind me.

"Yes, nobody knew where he lived, I wasn't stupid...."I trailed off seeing what I recognized as the jacket of one of Greybacks followers on the floor under the dinner table, it was covered in blood.

I stood up and picked it up, panic rushing through me,"Oh my god... did I kill him?"

"You better hope you did."Blaise said drawing out his wand, in full alert.

"B-but how would they know where to find me? Nobody knows where Remus lived- not even Harry- but... Draco knew."

"Draco would not sell you out to them-"

"He wasn't any good at protecting his things- they clearly raided his room for enough time to find pictures of all my friends... what if they found letters... from when I was here- would he be stupid enough to keep them?"

There was a creak from above and I held my finger to my lips heightening my listening enough to hear the creak of my bed as weight shifted off it and the smell I had mistaken as my own in my panic state filled my nose... there was someone else still here.

"Someone's upstairs."I mouthed.

"How-"

I grabbed Blaise's arm and turned on the spot as I heard rushed footsteps and we landed in the middle of a forest, Blaise stumbled and turned,"What- what the hell was that?"

"That must be how I got out- they did find me- they must've guessed I'd go there... but I was there all day- I didn't- they wouldn't have- couldn't have been there without me knowing.."I said pacing in a panic.

"They must be following you... how long were they there... How could they get in?"

"I... I left house multiple times... I guess they must've seen me and followed me back... I didn't even sense them... It must've been when I went to owl you..."

"Where are we?"

"The forest Remus and I used to change in... I can't go home- have nowhere to go- this is vast enough for me to hide- you can go- they'll kill you if they get their hands on you."I said and started to walk away but Blaise grabbed my arm.

"No. You are not going to hide in this forest. Go home."

"So I can put everyone in danger?"I shouted in frustration, throwing his hand off me.

"I can't go home, No matter where I go they'll follow- I don't have anywhere to go- I just wanna cry, Blaise! I don't want to do this anymore! I've had enough! I can't stand the pain- I can't stand the anger- I can't stand the fear. The war is over so why can't the pain be over too?"I screamed feeling agony and frustration riddle my heart,"I can't deal with this anymore- I can't do this alone- I'm all alone- HE'S DEAD- REMUS IS DEAD AND I'M ALL ALONE- I HAVE TO GO AGAINST A PACK ALL ON MY OWN."

I broke down like I had the night before, but this time Blaise was there. He got on his knees and put his hand on my shoulder,"You aren't alone... you've lost a lot, yes... the pain you've endured is more than many of us have in a single lifetime- you've survived so much of it. You took on You-Know- No- Voldemort- and lived to tell the tale. You're the bravest person I know- you can overcome this... but you don't have to do it alone... You have me. I may be no one special- I may not be Remus Lupin but I'm your friend... and I can help you."

I took a deep breath to compose myself, I have endured a lot of pain... but I have survived a lot too... He was right... I needed to be strong- we could work through this...

I looked up at him and his eyes widened,"One is blue."

"What?"

"Your eye changed-"

"Let me see- I know you have a mirror in your robes, Zabini- give it."I demanded, holding my hand out.

"I only have it because sometimes I get lashes in my eye."He said stubbornly pulling it out of his robes.

"Please- I know you put a little concealer on, Yes I know your secrets, supermodel."I said snatching it out of his hands and held it up to see indeed one eye was red and the other way blue.

"So will it go away then?"I asked Blaise as if he had the answers but he merely shrugged.

"I don't know... but you can stay with me until you're ready-"

"Your mother would not like that."I shook my head.

"True- but she's busy looking for a new husband."He shrugged,"She won't even notice... or you can go home; what's the worse that can happen?"

"I terrify the people I love- they think I'm a monster and throw me out? Happened once before you know."I suggested.

"They were horrible narrow brained muggles- besides aren't you talking about the same people who literally won the war?"

"This is different."

"You're harmless- ouch- semi-harmless."He rubbed his arm where I had punched.

"George has enough to deal with- I can't just bombard him with werewolf troubles."I shook my head,"What if sends him over the edge?"

"Well if you won't go back I'm technically your only friend now... so if you won't come with me-"

"I should live in the forest; love your thought process, bye."I turned rushing forward.

"No,no."He stopped me again,"There's still one place we can go if you're desperate... Ally's flat."

"No."

"It's our only choice-"

"No! That's wrong!"

"Her family already cleared it out- it's practically empty except for a few pieces of furniture."

"I can't just go in there- no-"

There was a crack behind us and I pushed Blaise aside in time to dodge the Werewolf I knew as Ray Goldum, he was one of Fenrir's most loyal followers, and he was clearly badly injured, his clothes were utterly tattered and his arms were exposed showing all the wounds I must've inflicted upon him.

"Think you can outrun our pack?"Ray spat with a growl his eyes glowing blue,"The wizards war may be over but ours has just begun, little pup."

"You're wasting your time."Blaise said, his wand out, making my eyes go wide,"It's only a matter of time before you're all caught."

"The meat bag has a big mouth..."Ray snarled,"This isn't your business."

"Why are you doing his bidding?"I asked warily, wand at the ready.

"His bidding? Nah darling, this is personal... what you don't remember? Was the rage too good? You killed me brother."

"I didn't-"

"Winter, 1995."He spat angrily.

A coldness filled my body, he pointed at me,"Aaah, ring a bell don't it? The day you ripped werewolves to shreds for your bloody wizards."

"You were gonna do the same to me- I wasn't conscious."I shook my head.

"You killed him no less- so I get to kill you now."He snarled and started forward.

"STUPEFY!"Blaise and I shouted and the werewolf flew backwards.

Blaise took hold of me before I could turn and he took lead, we landed in the alley of some busy street,"You have to go home... if you won't go anywhere else."

"Hogwarts- I'll go to Hogwarts-"

"It's the same if you go home!"Blaise exclaimed, shaking my shoulders hoping to knock some sense into me,"I know you're scared! But you're safe with them- you're safe- I know you think they'll look at you like a monster but they won't. You've got to believe that."

"It's hard."I said shakily,"You heard him Blaise- it isn't over. The things I did are coming back to haunt me- who am I to say I'm not as bad as them?"

"You are not bad."He said holding my shoulders tightly,"You protected yourself, there is no wrong in that. They killed innocents-  you killed murders when you weren't in your right mine. You told me yourself 'Fear makes people do terrible things.' You were scared and acted on your wolves instinct. They can only get you if you're alone- they're being hunted; they're limited and no longer in power- Fenrir is in hiding it isn't safe for him to go on a chase for you; The best thing you can do is go home and be with George.  You said Remus told you to confront it... that it's the only way to live without going insane."

My mind was running wild but my body was aching and exhausted and all I did want to do was go home. I wanted George.

"Fine... I'll go."I said feeling exhausted.

"Good... take my hand."He held it out.

I took his hand shaking my head,"I'm gonna regret this."

We turned on the spot and landed by the shared flat, I paused seeing the light on inside but Blaise pulled me forward not allowing me to bail, I struggled trying to pull away,"Okay, maybe I was wrong- we can go with your mum- I'm sure she's an amazing host, I-I can be proper, I like tea like everyone else that's what rich folk do right just tea time; Oh my god is that a pimple on your face?"

"Where?"He stopped in a panic touching his face, I bopped his forehead pushing it back and I broke out in a run screaming,"TO FREEDOM."

But with a crack he was right in front of me,"Really? You were gonna run? You have a wand you know- You could've apparated."

"Oh right-"I grabbed my wand

"No-"but as Blaised grabbed my wrist the front door opened.

"Eli?"

We turned to face Harry, Ron and Hermione who had come to see what the loud noises had been, Harry stepped down clearly a protective stance as he pulled out his wand going for Blaise without a second thought.

"No- no don't-"I said standing in front of Blaise,"Don't- He's good- he's okay."

"He's friends with Malfoy- he was a Deatheater-"

"I wasn't."Blaise said, annoyed not even flinching at the sight of Harry's wand.

"He fought on our side- ask them two- they saw him."I said defensively,"He was helping me."

"Your eye..."Hermione was the first to notice,"What happened to your hair?"

I stayed quiet but Blaise spoke for me,"It's temporary- it's a potion gone wrong... we just need somewhere to brew an antidote."

"Well..."Harry said looking at Ron and Hermione for reassurance clearly not trusting my own judgement when it comes to friends, who nodded,"Alright... but one wrong move and you're out."

"Is that any way to treat a guest? Gryffindors always were so hostile."Blaise commented to me walking forward, in his usual confident stride.

"You're walking into a lion's den, my friend- watch the tone for a minute, would you?"I warned him following behind him, giving apologetic glances to the three Gryffindors.

"So where's your copper cauldron?"Blaise asked eyeing the apartment with a hint of disapproval, everyone looked at each other for a second.

"You're joking... A house full of witches and wizards and nobody has a copper cauldron?"Blaise said bemused.

"We have pewter cauldrons-"

"Those are for first year- whatever I'll take it; where are your ingredients then?"Blaise waved his hand, dismissing the lack of proper equipment.

When Blaise was met with yet another silence he gave me a look,"How do you live in these conditions? I raised you better than this, Elizabeth."

"You little- just go get them."

"I'm only saying-"

"You'll have no tongue to say anything if you don't leave in five... four.. three-"

"Gone."With a crack surely he was gone.

"Who keeps apparating?"

My heart jumped as I came to face George who came walking out of our bedroom, he stopped when his eyes fell on me,"Eli..."

"I know it looks horrible but I can explai-"But before I could finish his arms were around me crushing me in a hug and his lips on mine, for a moment it allowed me to forget everything.

"Oh merlin-"

"So that's how that feels, huh? Sorry Ron."

"How cute."

Crack!

"Disgusting."

We pulled away to see Blaise's arms busy with his cooper cauldron filled with ingredients, George seemed surprised but said,"Zabini."

"Weasley."Blaise nodded, there wasn't tension but an awkwardness at best in the air.

I cleared my throat,"He's helping me with my little furry problem."

"What's the probl- oh the hair."He nodded.

"Don't worry she'll be looking like a weasley in a second- if I could just."Blaise settled in on the kitchen counter,"You know good hosts always offer guests tea."

"I'll give you something alright- hurry up."I demanded taking a seat on the island.

"Sheesh- what am I your house elf?"

Hermione tensed up at this comment and looked at me but Harry cut in,"So... what you're one of the good guys now?"

"I wouldn't say I'm a good guy... I just don't care... never have."Blaise said focusing on brewing the potion as Hermione came to my side to whisper.

"Is this a good idea? You could brew it yourself you were brilliant at potions."

"It was a combined effort- cleary I'm months out of practice and he's already thought of a way to fix this mess."I said.

"You never cared?"Ron said in disbelief,"Right like a slytherin pureblood never had thoughts against muggleborns."

"I'm best friends with one, aren't I? I've never done anything against someone cause they're muggleborn-  and unlike some- my mother doesn't mess with with the Dark arts... she thinks its unwise... her husbands on the other hand..."Blaise spoke as he brewed, his tone cool as if we were back at Hogwarts taking a potions lesson.

"She's not too keen on werewolves though."I commented, bitterly.

"She's got a faint heart... scars scare her..."

"Mmhm."I said with a side-eye.

George rubbed my back and whispered in my ear,"he went with you?"

I shook my head and looked up at him, these past few days without him felt like an eternity,"I owled him afterwards."

"I truly never cared for the whole 'muggleborn bad- pureblood good' blah blah crap- people suck in general.."Blaise said stirring the potion, he was only being truthful because Harry still seemed to not trust him, and Blaise always thought Harry thought I had terrible judgement- he wanted to prove him wrong.

"Amen."I muttered.

"I didn't care about the houses unless it came to quidditch."Blaise admitted,"Got to have pride in our own houses, don't we?"

"Slytherins don't come in one type, you know."I told the trio who were looking at Blaise in disbelief,"He is conceited though."

"I am a man of many things; conceited is not one."He said, with a wink.

"Point proven."

"Here we are..."He poured the new glowing blue solution into a cup and slid it to like it if it was beer,"Bottoms up- don't dribble."

I took a deep breath and did as told chugging it down in one go and coughed as the awful taste hit my throat,"Oh god- that's disgusting."

"Yeah, but it's working."He held up the mirror from his robes and sure enough slowly my awfully chopped short hair was going to it's natural color  in splotches, but the red eye remained.

"Thank god."I muttered,"Thank you, Blaise."

"Of course."He began to gather his things and Harry, Ron and Hermione shared a look before walking out of the kitchen as I helped Blaise gather his things, George remained seated looking towards where the trio disappeared.

"What do I say?"I whispered to Blaise as we had our backs to him.

"Just be honest."

"Are you insane?"

"He's your boyfriend."

"Exactly- It's part of the rules wasn't it? No wolfy business."

"When you were trying to get in his pants-"

"I was not-"

"Oh you so were."

"Zabini."

"Dursley."

"I'm not gonna go as Dursley anymore."

"Oh right, Evans. Just tell him."

"Tell me what?"

We turned with wide-eyes as if we had just been caught after hours but George was standing behind us now with curiosity.

"Oh... that..."I gave Blaise a look and as always even if he was against it he had my back.

"She wants to legally change her name."Blaise said.

"Oh... really? t-to what?"George asked confused and surprised at the sudden topic.

"Elizabeth Lily Evans."Blaise said,"She wants to drop Dursley... you know... all the bad memories."

"Well... If that's what you want... we can make plans to go to the Ministry."George said sincerely.

"We'll talk about it later."I nodded and he squeezed my arm lovingly before leaving the kitchen and I punched Blaise's shoulder once he was out of sight.

"Ouch! Well what did you want me to say?"

"Anything else but that."

"But it's the truth."

"The last thing I wanna do is go to the ministry- things are messy even with things changing for the better- werewolves are still frowned upon, you know."I snapped.

"But Isn't the new minister of magic your friend?"He asked confused,"You can change your name through him- all the other stuff... it'll take time but I'm sure it'll get better."

"...I still don't know if it's a good idea to change my name though... you're right it only reminds me  of... them... but I don't think Harry would be too keen with me taking his mother's maiden name."

"It's your family name too- do what you want; or you can marry weasley take that name instead."He suggested.

"I'm seventeen."I glared at him.

"Legal enough for a witch- or what? Not that inlove?"

"Shut up- I do love him... of course I've thought of it but I don't think either of us is emotionally ready for that... we're both too young and it's barely been a month, Blaise. We love each other but there's a lot more going on that we need to figure out- he wants to go back to the shop... meaning he's considering reopening it... I don't think he can handle it on his own... It was always the both of 'em..."I said sadly.

"Yeah.."Blaise said in a low tone,"I can't imagine his pain... but he'll manage... you both will with time..."

"What about you?"I asked him curiously,"What will you do?"

"Go back to finish my seventh year once the school year comes around and get a job."He shrugged,"Maybe meet someone?"

"So you want to date?"

"You make it look like its worth trying- it's gross."He made a face,"What will you do though? Have you thought about it?"

I shrugged busying myself with drying off the cauldron,"Not really... I guess help run the shop... I'm the only other person who knows how to run it... and help raise my godson."

"You're not gonna go back and finish school?"Blaise asked concerned.

"Don't see the point."I shrugged,"I'll have a bunch of legal stuff coming up once everything settles down because of the registry and the rogue werewolves on the loose... might have to get myself an apparition license to refrain them from taking me in on that alone."

"Aren't they overturning laws?"

"They're working on it; the focus is taking away pro- pureblood laws and catching Deatheaters at the moment... there's still so much corruption within the ministry even now- and you heard Ray- it's only beginning for werewolves... the wizarding world hates us all pro-pureblood or not- nothing will change unless the a good lot of 'em decide we're alright..."I shook my head.

"Are you okay with settling with working in a joke shop, though? You wanted so much more- whether it was with the muggles or wizards."Blaise asked concerned.

"As long as the shop keeps open... it means keeping Fred alive in a way... so yes..."I nodded.

"Then do it... it's gonna be hard...but you'll be glad you did."

"Why are you always so preachy?"I sighed pulling him into hug.

"The same reason you're so huggy- it's how I show I care."He said with a look of disgust and I smacked the top of his head with a pack of dragon's blood tree leaves, before tossing them in the cauldron in his arms.

"That's enough then go away... and be careful."I warned.

"I'll be fine- I'll visit you soon."He said and with that he was gone.

I took a deep breath, maybe he's right...I just need to do it. Rip the bandaid off and deal with it- it isn't gonna go away; this pain will always remain. The best I can do is hope tomorrow will be better and eventually things will be alright.

"He's gone?"George asked from the door,"We didn't even get to grudgingly ask if he wanted to stay for dinner."

"He had somewhere to be..."I shook my head and felt a sigh of relief escape my chest, and I walked forward wrapping George in a tight embrace,"I love you."

"I love you too... are you sure you're alright?"He asked and I looked up at him in wonder,"Are you? How was the burrow?"

"...It was... okay... the time away really helped."He admitted.

"I'm glad..."I said burying my face into his chest, taking in his warmth.

"It's almost gonna be two weeks..."He said quietly.

I nodded gently,"If you're ready... we'll go."

He stayed quiet, I knew he wouldn't ever be ready but he wanted to take that step and I would take it with me as we promised.

The time eventually came when he asked if we could go to the shop and so he began to pack while I delivered the news to our three other roommates.

"So... George and I have decided that we're gonna move to the flat above the shop.."I broke it to them and the looks on their faces was exactly what I expected, they were confused and concerned.

"Are you sure this is the right thing to do?"Hermione asked.

"I thought the whole point was to put distance?"Ron asked.

"So you're moving out... like actually moving?"Harry asked.

"We made a promise... that if he thinks he can handle it we would go... he's been doing better-"

"Exactly; this is gonna make it harder it'll be like starting over; he just started getting comfortable enough to speak to someone other than you."Ron said, desperately.

"You lot can come over whenever you like; we'll need the company... but admit it- we're crowded in here, Ron you sleep on the sofa-  you can have my bedroom and... who knows maybe this is what we need... rip the bandaid off." I shrugged.

They were still skeptical but it was all in good faith; they only wanted what was best for us.

"Can we at least help you move your things?"

"it's late... does it have to be now?"

"He's decided."I shrugged," and we're taking about two enchanted bags; I think we'll be fine."

With that George came out of the bedroom with one bag in his hands, he was using his wand to make the second one hover in front of him,"In fact, he can clearly manage on his own- need a hand there?"

I took the floating suitcase and nearly fell with it as he let it go and he said was,"Oops."

"You'll still visit the burrow, right?"Ron asked George who nodded,"Mum will hunt me down if i don't."

"Well then we'll set off."I said but still felt hesitant as I took George's hand.

The others shouted biddings of farewell wishing us luck as we turned and disapparated into Diagon Alley. The streets were rather empty as shops still had not been fully fixed up and set up for business just yet, but still it was livelier than the last time I had walked down these streets, just up the road you could see there was still damage from when we broke into gringotts and there were streets blocked off to fix up damages.

We went around a corner hand in hand and that's when we saw it causing us both to stop holding our breath. It still stood tall and proud though it was still and lifeless, there was little damage done to the shop, though the U-NO-POO posters had been damaged and there were clear notes that there had been blasts thrown at the building.

I was determined to lead him in but to my surprise George walked ahead of me with determination, he stopped by the door of the flat.

I waved my wand in a complex discreet manner and with the multiple clicks of locks and disarming of spells, he placed his hand on the doorknob, he seemed desperate to rush in hoping on the other side of that door would be Fred with his usual smirk, laughing at how we fell for his stupid prank, how it was all just a way to get back at us for something we must've done to him, but he hesitated afraid to open it to a dusty empty stairway, barren and cold as the weather felt.

I put my hand over his and helped him turn the knob, having that same hope that if we ran up those steps he'd be there but I knew very well the entire building was empty and it was confirmed once the door creaked open and it surely was dusty and barren.

I cleared my throat letting go of George's hand to grab our bags, he slowly walked ahead of me, he dragged himself up the steps as I locked the door behind us with a flick of my wand, I rushed to be at his side, lugging the heavy bags.

I tossed them down with a heavy sigh, looking around the living room with a heavy heart, but trying to keep the situation from crumbling I said,"Well...it's just the way we left it... a bit dusty... but nothing we can't fix, right?"

I looked over to George to see he was staring down the hall where Fred's bedroom door was wide open, his bed was messily made, there was a few wrappers of his favorite honeydukes sweets I had bought him poking out from under the bed, his sweater and a couple shirts were tossed on the ground with shoes that rested at the foot of his bed awaiting his arrival that would never come,  I could smell his cologne from here.

"Should we take the guest room?"I told him more than asked, I picked up a bag and grabbed his hand pulling him away from the view of Fred's room, he followed me without a fight as he always did.

I handed him the bag to hold as I pulled off the dirty dusty sheets, I waved my wand to open the curtain allowing some of that street light in to the gloomy room.

I heard George set the bag on the vanity, and zip it open, he was beginning to unpack, I smiled softly turning to help him waving my wand to make the sheets fold themselves so I can wash them later.

He helped me fill the drawers neatly with our clothes, and dust off the room, when he motioned to the naked bed as if it was disturbing him.

I nodded, as I stuffed bag into an empty bottom drawer for safe keeping,"oh yeah... uh... I think there's clean sheets in the second storage room last time I checked."

He stepped forward but stopped as he realized where he had to go, I shot up from my knees, accidentally knocking them on the edge of the drawer,"Ah- I-I'll go, we still have a second bag to unpack."

I walked out before he could say anything, waving my wand to make the bag float to him, before making my way down the hall rubbing my knees, stopping as the smell of Fred's cologne and gunshot powder filled my nose when I stepped right in front of the wide open doorway, I gripped the door frame looking at the empty spot on his bed.

I felt tears brim my eyes, my nose burned as I fought back the tears, I shook my head and reached to shut the door softly, I placed my hand against his door, it would be best for both of our sake to keep away from here.

I turned and headed towards the shop, unlocking the door to the shop and stepped in feeling the stuffy air, that was tense with more than just dust bunnies.

I looked down at the empty shop, it was dusty, abandoned and it seemed almost haunted as it taunted me with the ghost of our past laughter, the echoes of our times in here seemed to still reverberate in my ears. I could hear their laughter- their united words, they way it should be.

I shook my head looking away heading towards the storage room,"Okay...focus, just in and out-clean sheets, candles, any cleaning supplies."

I felt uncomfortable as I quickly tried to grab what I needed, I felt as if I was being watched or maybe it was just how eerie it felt to see the shop so dull and lifeless that made me feel unusual and the thought of George being alone here wasn't good for either of us.

I dumped the cleaning supplies in a bucket, tucked the sheets under my arm and grabbed a broom and mop, with my free hand I grasped my wand tightly for reassurance when a bottle of some weird wizard cleaning bleach spilled it all over the ground off the shelf behind me, I sighed,"Crap."

I groaned feeling the wetness fill my shoes that were becoming discolored, I waved my wand to clean the mess before lugging everything out of the shop and locking it behind me, I dumped everything on the kitchen table, kicking off my shoes I tried to make the color come back with no luck."Dammit- these literally lasted me three years."

I waved my wand towards the mop and broom and the sprang to life beginning to clean up the kitchen and traveled to the guest bedroom, tucking my shoes and the sheets under my arms and lighting two candles to fill the flat with a smell that reminded me a lot of an expensive apple shampoo I think I might've smelled before.

I was taking a second candle to our bedroom when George stepped out to help me, grabbing the sheets from under my arm.

"Thank you, Love."I said warmly as he went to make the bed, I took liberty to light the candle and put it in the middle of the vanity, I watched George in the reflection as I messed with the discolored stain on my shoes, Ron was right... maybe it was too soon, it was back to how it was at the beginning when we both hardly spoke, and I was afraid he would go back to avoiding everyone and just follow me around again... I didn't mind that he did because he made an effort when he was with me, thinking of my pain too but he went through the motions with everyone else he would fall into a sort of zombie mode.

"We can buy you new ones..."He croaked as he set the clean pillows on the bed.

"It's alright...I still like them..."I said slipping the shoes back on, now that they were dry but the stains still remained,"Gives 'em a new vibe."

"Are you hungry, love?"He croaked out, I turned to look at him surprised at the sudden question but nodded,"Y-yeah, a little..."

"Should we go out?"He asked almost desperately, and I could tell he wanted a break from being in here.

"Of course, I'll put out the candles and lock up, just put on a jacket it's quite cold outside."I told him and slowly backed away from the room.

I got excited every time he asked me to do something, it was him taking lead, so I excitedly put up all the defensive spells around the shop as Fred and George taught me, before locking the door I turned to walk down the corridor when I saw George standing in front of the closed door of Fred bedroom, tears in his eyes.

My breath hitched not knowing what to do but as he stood there frozen I decided to step forward putting myself between the door and George, his eyes went down to me as a single tear escaped his eye, He was holding it back... he was trying.

I reached up and wiped the tear away gently,"We should get going."

He placed his hand over mine and I felt the cold of the Weasley ring as he gripped it tightly, I patted his new jacket down with my free hand he had bought it not long ago,"You wore it, it looks wonderful."

"Your eye... it's blue again."He commented softly, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.

I looked at him with wide eyes,"Really? are you sure?"

"I think I know blue from red, love... I was really starting to love the red one."He said softly and I smiled softly at his comment as he caressed my cheek.

He placed a kiss on the top of my head and I felt a shiver down my spine as I momentarily thought of Fred and how he had done the same before we fought...

Fuck.

I forcibly blinked away the tears that threatened to fill my eyes and I turned towards the exit not trusting to face him without my face deceiving me,"Come on, Let's go celebrate the arrival of my blue eye."

I felt guilty. He had never hated that when people looked at him they saw Fred but now he seemed to despise it because he felt like people saw him as a walking reminder of pain- it made him feel guilty like he was out of place like it shouldn't have been him who survived... like he shouldn't have. I had been so determined to never make that mistake, I didn't think it would be an issue as I never had trouble telling them apart but now sometimes I did see Fred in him when he did certain things and it did hurt... I couldn't help it.

We left the flat holding hands as we walked down the rather empty street, I held him protectively to me as we headed out to find somewhere to eat and get away for a while.

It was difficult to breathe in the home that once used to feel like paradise. I always came to find George standing by Fred's bedroom door or by the the door of the shop when I left him alone, but besides that when we visited the burrow instead of hiding away behind me or upstairs when I was busy he made the effort to join us. He would mutter a few words to Bill, Ron or Charlie who tried keeping him in the loop of things or to edge him to crack a joke. He seemed determined to face his mother even when the pain lashed across her face at times, he sat with Hermione and Harry if I was helping Mrs. Weasley and Fleur, he help out Ginny set the table and even volunteered to wash the dishes one night.

I watched him from the doorway curiously as rather than using a wand, he was copying my habit of doing them by hand,"You know... someone once told me there's a faster way to do it."

"and someone told it was more fun this way."He said looking back at me.

I gave him a soft smile and walked over to him picking up a scrub,"It'll go faster if we do it together."

We worked in a comfortable silence taking our time to wash the dishes when George suddenly bumped me with his hip causing me to accidentally fill my arms with soap and I looked at him in shock at his sudden action,"Oops."

I scoffed and nudged him back,"Oops."

"Boop."He touched my nose with a hand full of soap bubbles and I gasped with an amused laugh but took to cupping his face with my soapy hands,"How cute."

A devious smile I missed cracked on his lips and he took a hold of a mountain of bubbles on the sink and I instantly knew what he wanted to do and I grabbed his arms to stop him laughing at how excited he was trying to put the mountain of soap on my head,"Oh- no, no- George! No! I TOOK A SHOWER THIS MORNING!"

"What's wrong with another?"He smiled and caressed my cheeks causing me to shout at the cold touch but laugh as he mocked me,"Hooow cute."

"Oh you're so on."I made to grab as bubbles possible but he grabbed my arms pulling them up to stop me and we struggled giggling as we still managed to get bubbles on eachothers faces until we both had beards on our faces.

"You really shouldn't grow a beard."He told me amused.

"No? I think I look hot."I said showing off my beard to him but he whacked the beard away playfully making me laugh, he wrapped an arm around my waist.

"You know I don't think we should wash the dishes together anymore... everytime we do it we always end up here."I said knowingly.

"What do you mean?"He looked at me curiously.

"In a romantic moment that's gonna be ruined in three... two-"He cut me off my planting his soft lips on mine delicately; the warmth of the kiss seemed to fill my entire body but the taste of soap seeped through causing us both to pull away wiping our lips making sounds of disgust laughing at each others reactions.

"That was horrible."

"Worst kiss we've ever had."

"No more dishes."

"No... god no."I shook my head but looked at George adoringly seeing as he still held a smile on his face after we wiped the soap off.

"What?"He asked wiping his face even more,"Do I still have like a horn or something?"

"No..."I said shaking my head smiling.

"What is it?"He asked.

"I just love your smile.."I admitted and wiped a spot of soap off that star freckle I loved so much,"It makes me happy.."

He relaxed to my touch the smile softened but it remained, I pecked his lips gently not caring if soap remained,"I'm gonna go get you a new shirt."

"I'll.. dry the floor."He said surprised to how wet the floor was as if we hadn't had a full blown bubble war.

I left George to clean the wet floor to get us some shirts from upstairs but when I got to the stairs, I had to step back when I noticed all the Weasleys, Harry and Hermione look away when I passed by the living room.

"Umm... what's going on?"I asked confused as to why they were acting so odd.

It took a second as they all shared looks as if deciding if they should tell me or not. But then most of them came forward at the same time exclaiming in excitement like if I had performed a magic trick in front of them and they wanted to know my secret- well... a muggle magic trick.

"He was laughing."

"He actually laughed."

"How did you do that?"

"Did you use a spell?

"He literally doesn't even laugh at our joke-"

"Not even a smile."

I looked between them shocked and looked at everyone who seemed interested as to what I was gonna say. I opened my mouth but closed it unsure how to respond,"Were all of you watching us?"

"Yeah..."

"Kind of.."

"I just wanted a glass of water.."

"Charlie told us all to go watch."

"Bill dragged me."

"I'm a mother it's my job to pry."

"That is... weird."I said pointing at all them,"Very weird.."

I walked the steps backwards as if they would follow me up the stairs to question me but as soon as I could bolted up the steps. To be quite honest, I was just as shocked as they were but we have grown comfortable with each other... we still loved each other at the end of the day... we always had moments like this before, when no matter what was going on we'd find a way to make at least ONE loving moment.

I had just managed to change my shirt and walked out of the bathroom when I bumped into Mrs.Weasley who seemed to have been waiting for me. She fiddled nervously with her top and said,"I don't know if it would be an overstep... but I've got to ask... has George.. um... spoken about Freddie... how has he been dealing with this... he hasn't opened up to us... I'm beginning to worry... please I know he's spoken to you."

I sighed not knowing if I should share most of things George has done or said but since the last time they had seen him express what he felt or anything was when he went after Percy... I thought it would be best to ease some of Mrs. Weasley's worry.

"He's been doing better... it's easier for him to be here than the flat-"

"I don't understand why you two would move back in there."She said with worry.

"He wanted to... He's trying to build his courage to open the shop back up."I admitted.

"H-he still wants to run the shop?"She said, not in disappointment but in a sense of relief, it seemed to assure her that her son wasn't lost in his grief forever.

"He's thinking about it... we haven't actually made any plans for it."I said shifting my stance,"He's doing his best, Mrs. Weasley... I'm sorry I can't tell you everything I'm sure George wants to keep some things between us... he'll open up to you when he's ready... but I can tell you that he's trying... slowly... but he's taking those steps."

"Oh my dear..."She said her voice full of emotion, she cupped my cheek and sniffled,"He's so lucky to have you... you take good care of him.."

I shook my head gently,"It's me who's lucky... he does those things to make me laugh... even though he's hurting... I just hope I can help him feeling something more than just that.."

"He loves you... I can tell... you two just hold onto each other... maybe that's all you'll need."She whispered and I smiled gently and hoped she was right.

I didn't even notice my birthday come around until I hopped out of the shower and came out to the kitchen and nearly had a heart attack. George had invited everyone to the flat to celebrate and though his efforts were touching and I smiled- I wish he hadn't.

I had to escape to the shop's storage to cry because George wouldn't leave me alone trying to make my day special but I wanted nothing more than to crawl in bed and cry. I thought I had been in the clear until I heard footsteps outside the door and I stumbled to my feet wiping my face scrambling to make myself seem presentable and I looked around for an excuse to be in here as the door opened.

"J-just getting... candles- a little st- no I mean toilet paper-"

"It's just me."Harry said and I sighed deeply tossing down the toilet paper.

"What's wrong? You disappeared."He asked concerned.

"I'm fine."I shook my head.

"Come on spill it."He looked at me knowingly.

I covered my face as I felt the tears starting to build up shaking my head,"I..It's stupid... I just feel like can't breathe... I want to be happy... George went through all this effort for me- but I just feel like crying, Harry... I don't know why.."

"It's okay, you can cry- hey... it's okay"He hugged me allowing me to cry into him for the first time in years and though he was usually bad at comforting me, he held me tightly whispering words of comfort.

I sniffled trying to catch my breath but didn't let him go,"... I don't- I don't know what I would've done if I lost you too... "

Harry was silent but made to wipe away my tears as I continued my emotional blubbering,"l... that room is filled with people, Harry- but I felt so empty... I felt so detached... I just wanted to leave... I actually thought it would feel better to watch Dudley open all- what 56 presents this year instead... I can't believe I miss him. Harry i actually miss Dudley. I miss Ally.. I miss Fred... I miss Remus..."

"You miss your friends too, don't you?"He said as if he connected the dots, and even though I shook my head my eyes filled with tears.

"I miss people I can't have..."I said tearfully,"and people I don't want to have...why? I don't get it?"

"Because you loved them... and on this day all of them showed you that they loved you before..."He said rubbing my arms to soothe my crying,"It's okay to feel sad."

I sniffled taking in a shaky breath,"But George tried so hard..."

"I know.. but you just weren't ready.."Harry said knowingly,"It's okay to let him know-"

"No- no."I shook my head wiping my eyes,"No- I won't ruin it for him- he's even invited Percy... I can't just ruin it."

"Elizabeth."

"Oh don't you go using my name."I said sniffling trying my best to pull myself together,"I can deal with it... I'm gonna have like at least 20 more of these right? I gotta suck it up."

"You don't have to-"

"I want to- okay be like Blaise for a second; come on tell me to suck it up."I motioned for him to give me his best shot.

"I don't think you should-"

"Ugh! You gryffindors are so soft."I groaned annoyed but paced around shaking my arms as if I was preparing for a Quidditch game,"Okay- I got this. I got this- Just have to be normal. Say I came looking for uh... towels- yeah towels."

"Oh just come on."Harry grabbed my wrist pulling me out of the storage and back into the flat, I took massive deep breaths placing a smile on my face when George came over to me.

"Hey love.."He kissed my cheek,"You alright?"

"Yeah, fine- Just went to look for some towels."I held them up,"Harry helped me reach them- didn't you harry?"

"Uh- yeah, Teddy dribbled again."Harry said trying to act natural and I took sharp inhale trying not to glare at him for how bad he was at lying at the spot.

"You could use your wan- no matter; let's cut the cake yeah? Mum and I did it ourselves."He said and pulled me towards the kitchen, I only wished that I would be able to keep it together as they sang Happy Birthday, It felt muffled and far away. The memory of my mum placing a cake with two number five candles on the table at Privet Drive... Dad and Harry singing together in a momentary peace... Dudley and I held hands as  we blew out the candle and I remember my wish that I refused to share... It was to be as happy as I was in that moment for the rest of my life... and a new bike so I could give Harry my old one.

"Blow out the candles, dear."Mrs. Weasley said cheerfully.

I looked up at her coming back to reality and leaned forward holding my hair away from the flame.

"Make a wish."Ginny said, brightly.

I paused looking at the little flame but I closed my eyes.

'I wish we could all actually be happy.'

I blew out the flame and everyone cheered, I smiled softly as hands of affection reached out to me before the cake was pulled out of the way to be served around,  I took the opportunity to sit down in the living room and just take a deep breath.

"Hey.."George said besides me worry on his face,"...did I do something wrong?"

"No- Of course not, Georgie."I shook my head looking over to the family who was eating being loud and cheerful as they haven't been in while... it felt warm for a few seconds until you noted the missing faces,"You did amazing... they're all happy..."

"Are you happy?"He asked me.

The question stumped me, but I looked at him and the love in his eyes was enough for me to know my answer.

"Yeah... of course. Just wish Hermione and Ron could've been here..."I said with a soft smile,"Worried about them being on their own in Australia, you know.."

"Hermione will keep Ron out of trouble."He assured me pulling me to lean against him,"They'll be back in three weeks..."

"Yeah... hope Hermione can find her parents.."I said with concern.

"I know this probably the worst time to bring this up.."George started making me turn to look at him,"I was thinking we should open the shop up for school season.."

I was taken back,"Are you sure?"

"...I mean no... but I think it's what needs to happen next don't you think?"He said and I smiled softly feeling proud of how far he's come.

"Sure then... we can start preparing tomorrow if you'd like... I'll owl Lee- he wanted to help us set up when we decided to open."I suggested.

He took a deep breath,"How about we do it two days from now? A little time to prepare to prepare..?"

I chuckled and nodded,"Whatever is best for you."

"You're wonderful."He kissed my cheek.

"Thank you for the party, George..."I said softly and kissed his jaw,"It was great to see everyone... and to see you speaking to everyone.."

"...it was fun."He admitted nodding gently,"... think I can make Bill eat three slices of cake?"

"Five- make it a challenge, come on now."I said and he stood up with determination.

"Hey, Bill... so I was thinking.."George started as he pushed himself off the sofa.

I sighed sadly, maybe birthdays won't be a thing in this flat.

I unlocked the office, clicking the light on having to get documents to mark products, I paused as I reached over the spinning chair for a clipboard seeing Fred's magenta vest on the seat. I hesitated but picked it up.

My heart tightened looking at the name tag with blurred vision and the 'best twin' muggle little pin I had given him as a joke to poke fun at George. It still smelled like him even though he hadn't worn it in a while.

"Hey babe do you mind if Lee and I go to the village for packaging-"George stopped when he stepped in his eyes on the uniform in my hand,"..Where'd you get that?"

"..H-he left it on the chair..."I said and cleared my throat hoping it would clear away what was burning.

George stepped forward slowly extending his hand out for it.

I hesitated wanting to hold onto it a little longer... just a little longer but placed it in his hands. George was silent as he examined Fred's vest, the tears slowly building in his eyes like he was crashing back to reality as he held it to his chest... wishing to hold his brother once more.

I place my hands on his shoulders softly,"It's alright, love..."

He whimpered trying to not let out his sobs,"Fred..."

George looked at me with a sort of helpless look on his face as if to ask me to help him, but there was nothing I can do but pull him into a hug but his sobs came pouring out of him and it was so hard to keep myself from crumbling down with him as I held him. I barely noticed Lee coming to the doorway to check what the hold up was and his fell once he saw what was unfolding, I was holding a sobbing George who was clutching the vest to his chest trying so hard and failing to keep myself together.

He came over seeing tears beginning to stream down my face and patted George on the back to help me comfort him when I was being too weak for the both of us.

"Thank you."I mouthed weakly.

"It's okay.."He mouthed shaking his head, that time he was strong for the both of us, staying until George fell asleep helping me put him to bed allowing me to take away the vest.

"Where are you gonna put it?"Lee asked me as I gripped onto the vest.

I looked over to Fred's bedroom door and mustering all the strength I could, I opened the door, Lee right there behind me. I took a deep breath not being able to take that step inside.

"You don't have to put it in there.."Lee said trying to console me though by the tone of his voice, I don't think he could stand the sight of the empty bedroom either," Maybe hang it in the shop?"

"And let it get dirty? No."I shook my head blinking away the tears,"This is the one place no one will go in.. nothing in this room will be touched... not even the wrappers... it belongs here."

Lee didn't tell me that I could turn around and just leave it hanging in the office, he didn't pull  me away as I had hoped he did, but I couldn't take that step inside because I would crumble the second I did. I took the handle and without moving an inch forward placed it on the inner knob before closing the door in one breath.

A shaky breath escaped me and Lee patted my shoulder telling me I had been brave,"It's done..."

I turned to face him and we both nodded giving each other comforting soft smiles, and Lee held up the clipboard,"How about you and I get a start on the shop? ...It'll be hard... but I don't think he'll be able to be up for a while..."

I looked over to where George was resting hidden behind our bedroom walls, it felt uneasy leaving him alone but I knew he had cried himself to exhaustion and he wouldn't be awake till tomorrow morning and if we wanted to open the shop for school season, we needed to sort out stock as most of the things have been sitting on shelves for months and we likely lost a lot of money- there was probably a lot of things George would not be able to handle down there.

"Yeah... yeah let's sort things out... maybe when he's feeling up to it you can take him to the village for the packaging... I'll deal with the finances... I'd have to ask Bill to pay Great Auntie Muriel a visit for the things they left behind at her place..."I said my mind beginning to run with all the tasks I had to accomplish in less than a month and hope I finish before the full moon.

"Don't worry about when the moon comes."Lee said knowingly,"I'll help him out."

I smiled gently at Lee's generosity,"Thanks... thank you for helping us out so much."

"Of course... they're my best friends."Lee nodded and blinked away his own tears,"Shall we get to work then?"

"Right."I said rubbing my hands with a deep breath,"You think we'd be able to do it justice- not being Weasley's and all?"

"Your ginger- I'm incredibly hilarious. I indicate we can hold our own... besides no one knows Fred and George better than us."He said with a comforting pat and with the same heavy heart we both headed towards the door of the shop.

I was right- sorting the shop was a lot more than we bargained for; It seemed as if we were walking through the bottom of a pool even though we agreed to blast music as we carried out, cleared out and marked things with the thankful speed of magic though to speed things along we did a lot of heavy lifting; The suffocating absence of the Weasley twins laughter in our presence was adamant.

Exhausted and barely enough energy we both flopped onto the sofa, I buried my face into the cushion as he laid his head on the arm. I was sure his arms aches like mine did that both hardly notice it was nearly dawn until we heard,"What happened to you two?"

We sat up almost immediately defying our aching bodies at the sight of a confused still rather tired George, we were confused for a moment but glad to see him awake.

"Morning, love."I said forcing myself off the sofa with a groan wanting to hold him even though I was probably sweaty and gross,"We got a head start on the shop... how you feeling?"

"You started?"He asked surprised as I kissed his cheek,"I..I'm sorry I wanted to help-"

"Don't fuss about it, mate."Lee said waving his hand,"It wasn't hard... still got loads to do- just been one day, hasn't it?"

George nodded and I rubbed his chest as if to soothe his aching heart,"Why don't we head back to bed? I've got some extra blankets if you wanna take George's old bedroom or sleep on the couch, Lee- doubt you can apparate in this state."I said gently.

"I'll take the bed- hope you cleared out your underwear, Georgie."Lee joked and I smiled as George actually chuckled softly and said,"Don't count on it, mate- probably one under the pillow."

We got Lee settled in George's bedroom where he seemed to remain for most of the following month and his presence was very well needed in the empty apartment; between us both George seemed to be able to make a lot more effort and though it was weird to have moments to myself that weren't secluded to the bathroom It felt like a relief to know George had begun to lean on Lee for support as well.

It gave me time to deal with the stressful part of the shop that Fred typically took charge of that was dealing with all the other partners they had and setting orders, keeping track of stock and the money. Though he always claimed he wasn't one to deal with all 'that boring crud'- he was always very  poignant when it came with dealing with partners and keeping under budget. I was going off things I had heard him say when writing letters- I truly had never wished home phones were a thing in the wizarding world until this point, it would save the aching pain of my hands trying to make sure we weren't being ripped off of our profit or quality and having to explain what happened to Mr. Weasley a few times was more than painful.

I tossed down the quill running a hand through my hair as the month nearly was finished and  we had yet to receive a few of our orders, it was difficult to find places to advertise since I didn't know of many wizard villages but I followed Fred's notes trying to at least make justice to what he has pulled off, but with the moon around the corner and Hogwarts beginning to send off letters announcing the opening of the school, we had a week at best to get everything settled for the crowds that would fill Diagon Alley.

"Hey, you alright, love?"George asked concerned as he came into the office, he kissed the top of my head noting how stressed I looked,"I can help... though I don't know too much-"

"It's alright, it's about settled anyways- why are you dressed so nice? Got a date?"I asked noting he had made an effort to dress up today.

"Yeah, I should get going- don't wanna keep her waiting- Kidding! I'm only joking."He blocked my clipboard from hitting his arm,"Don't tell me you forgot your own cousin's birthday party?"

My heart dropped I hadn't even gotten him a gift,"Crap."

"Guess you did, that's a first.."He said and tucked my hair back making me look up at him,"You don't need to stress out over the shop, love... we're gonna do alright."

"I know.."I said with a soft smile,"Just wanna make sure everything's perfect, that's all."

"Well we can make sure later... it can wait- Hermione said the party will be at the burrow; It's her parent's first time going to visit says she'll need you so why don't you go hop in the shower and wear something red- as Mum put it 'The wizarding community is gathering at Hogwarts to thank and honor Harry for what he's done.' that the least we all had to do was attend the ceremony since McGonagall personally invited us."He said pushing the rolling chair,"Hunt us down if we ditched."

"Harry is gonna enjoy that."I said sarcastically,"and nice try- I'm wearing green."

"We'll look like christmas- come on have some Gryffindor spirit."

"Have some Christmas spirit!  How does the song go? Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, Ring the Hogwart bell."I sang spinning in the chair.

"We'll be late, Elizabeth."He said with a playful stern tone, stopping me from spinning.

"Yes, father."I rolled my eyes playfully, before jumping up to kiss his cheek and run.

I was worried about us returning to Hogwarts  and wondering if what we both had built up over the course of these three months would crumble the moment it came to view.  We were barely keeping it together as it is, barely able to function and go about with half of our minds. Even as I showered allowing the hot water to ease my stress, I still found the mere thought of Hogwarts  as daunting, especially now that Rita Skeeter was sniffling about trying to write a book on what happened, trying to make her money off the war- truly she wouldn't waste time writing about Harry Potter's- the boy who defeated Lord Voldemort, savior of the wizarding world- werewolf cousin and why she hasn't been questioned like other registered werewolves.

I gripped George's hand tightly as we landed by the gates of Hogwarts. It stood tall and proud before us- it appeared to shine brightly just as it had my first year as if it had been untouched by the ugly war that happened. A terrifying dread filled my chest instead of the excitement- I wanted to turn back and go home. George, on the other hand, surprised me by stepping forward pulling me with him. I wanted to fight, to pull away and just go home but instead I followed him all the way to front of the entrance that was busy with other Witches and Wizards conversing happily going in and out of the big entrance doors.

"George."I said softly tugging on his arm, he stopped moving forward to look at me with concern but before I could say another word.

"Eli! George! How 're yeh? 'een a while, hasn' it?"Hagrid was making his way down the steps towards us and crushed us into him causing us to groan as his kind actions took our breath away, he let us ago and smiled brightly at us,"we'll be down th' lake today- Oh Hello there Professor!"

We turned to see Professor- or should I say Headmaster McGonagall coming toward us from where I presumed she was coming the area by the lake.

"I hope you won't mind."McGongall said to us,"There will be so many coming- we're still sorting the last few to St. Mungos and people who still need protecting... thought keeping a mass of people from inside would do us well."

"Of course not, Professor."George said kindly.

"Mr. Jordan... nice seeing you again- I assume I won't need to keep an eye out for you."McGonagall said as Lee stepped up besides us.

"Great to be here ma'am- no problems today."Lee held up his hands.

"Shall we head there together?"She motioned towards the lake and George nodded gently pulling me along as he followed McGonagall towards the Black Lake, I didn't want to be here if I was totally honest, even as I sat with George as he whispered with Lee, I felt dread and a dull knife in my heart as no matter where I looked there was memories of the past, what I had fought so hard to escape but there was no escaping this time.

I stood up as Harry arrived but there was no getting to him as for the first time I actually witnessed how famous he was, reporters who came were trying to surround him and ask him questions, the witches and wizards who came for a single glance  of the famous Harry Potter crowded around the only thing that kept them from Harry was Hagrid as even Ron and Hermione were pulled back by the crowd.

It wasn't until he made it onto the little stage that the crowd backed off unable to move forward and I felt George grab my arm softly pulling me back towards him and I followed without a fight. The Ceremony started with Kingsley, the acting Minister of Magic, addressing the audience about why we were there and how much positive progress the Wizarding World has done in little time since Harry defeated Lord Voldemort. McGonagall followed in speaking a few words about how wonderful Harry was during his years at Hogwarts and how she was glad that he would return to finish his seventh year.

"The hardest part is moving forward."McGongall said,"Hogwarts will be a remembrance of what has been lost... but will stand as proof it is possible to rebuild and continue with great courage."

George took a deep breath besides me and I turned my attention to him gripping his hand tightly giving him a soft smile. I turned my attention back towards the little stage when McGongall invited Harry to speak a few words and felt intrigued to see what he would have to say.

"Um...okay."was the first thing that came out of his mouth causing me to look away to hold my laugh,"Yes... well, I don't have much to say but to acknowledge this isn't my victory... I don't deserve nor want to have the glory- the attention of this solely on myself... I wouldn't have made it far without my friends."

I looked around seeing everyone was paying close attention to what Harry had to say, taking in his every word as if it would change their lives as they know it, I peered over to the crowd of reporters with a sense of weary when I caught glimpse of Rita Skeeter among them scanning the crowd suspiciously-  her ugly green quill scribbling away besides her.

I leaned down hoping to evade her eyes, feeling a small panic pierce through me.

"So If you want to honor me- I want to honor them for what they've done and keeping us moving forward... so want Ron, Hermione, Elizabeth come up here and say a few words..."

My breath hitched in my throat, I watched Ron and Hermione get up from the front row hesitantly go up the steps, Harry stepped towards them whispering in their ears and they seemed to be arguing quietly until Harry stepped forward with Hermione who looked nervous,"Hermione will say a few words."

"Aren't you going up?"Lee asked from besides George both seeming confused as to why I wouldn't get up and why I looked like I was about to be sick.

I met eyes with Harry and I shook my head and he gave me a soft smile waving me towards him as Hermione awkwardly started to address the crowd, I looked over to the reporters to see Rita Skeeter trying to find where Harry was looking, it felt like the world was spinning, my stomach was turning and anxiety rattled my chest, everything felt like it was moving slightly faster but I was moving in slow motion, I hadn't realized Hermione was through with her speech and Harry went up to speak as soon as he was finished.

"My cousin Elizabeth Dursley should come up and say some words... she was the strongest one of us... Elizabeth please..."Harry begged, I shook my head not caring that he was using his little pleading eyes, anger and anxiety filled my body realizing all heads were turning my direction, one of them being Rita Skeeter and she smacked her sleeping cameraman's head and I put my head down allowing my hair to cover my face.

"Ronald Weasley will say a few words."Professor McGonagall cut through turning the attention on her as she began to introduce Ron.

I shot up off my seat not being able to breathe and ignored Lee and George's whispers and hands as I made out of here, I didn't even notice myself rushing away until I was met with a familiar cement wall where I usually ran to hide, but there was nowhere else I wanted to be. I was locked out not knowing the password but I decided to try the one I remember clearly, the password of my first year, the very first one I knew.

"Salazar."

To my surprise the entrance slipped open, and I rushed in being met with the familiar scent of must covered by the warm scent of cool mint. The common room was empty and clean as I stepped deeper inside feeling an odd sense of comfort as the anxiety and panic fizzled away knowing I was safe in here... I was always safe here...

I sat down on the sofa as I have done a thousand times before but no one was there to ask me what was wrong this time or to poke fun at me. I was alone.

I laid back listening the gurgle of the water and the crackling of the never ceasing fire that warmed the common room. I sniffled feeling the emptiness settle in but I didn't cry. I just allowed myself to feel the sadness. It still hurt... but this was the one pain I didn't avoid. I came to terms with this pain... that I lost the friends I once knew... I accepted that doubting I'd ever see them again anyways.

I sat up looking up the steps to the girls dormitory as if the echoes of past laughter had barely reached me, I stood up and went up the steps, my heels clinking against the cement steps until I came to face the door that once led to my dorm room.

I opened the door with a bit of hesitation but I felt drawn to see it. To see how the room that once was filled with the presence of my friends was erased of our existence. I looked around the place that used to be my bed, I touched the drawers wondering if anything remained inside that I might've left behind but opening it and all the many others in the dorm- they were of course empty.

I sighed closing it, I knew it would empty- the whole room; the whole lot of the common room must've been cleaned out by the Hogwarts House-elves when everyone went home. I guess I was hoping to see if something of my past would linger... I hoped that maybe I hadn't lost everything or maybe to find something of Ally to keep for myself... maybe find my house ring that she wore so proudly even after all that happened.

I wasn't ashamed to be a Slytherin... I never could be... I grew up in this house, I made all my memories here- I wrote my future here... even though it didn't work out the way I wanted; every time I fell apart I found myself here. I found a way to live happily, I always found a new focus despite the pain or the fear... I made my own life here... but now it was nowhere to be found.

I sighed sitting on the bed I once slept on, I looked around one last time and headed back down the steps when I saw the bookcase where students usually left old books, it was the most worn out bookcase in the common room as everyone would leave their mark there- I found the mark I made in my fourth year once we had learned the spell to burn it in, besides mine was Blaise's name, above his was Draco's and Ally's she had signed it a second time just to teach us... below mine was Pansy, Crabbe and Goyle's names.

"We usually tend to persuade our students to leave their mark in this school..."I turned to see Professor McGonagall behind me, I hadn't even heard her come in,"Never expected the words to be taken literally... but Slytherin's are ones for tradition even in the most curious ways."

I stayed silent looking towards the names not knowing what to say.

"I don't think you'll remember, Elizabeth... but in your first year Dumbledore said,'It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to our enemies, but just as much to stand up to our friends.'"

"I remember... he gave Neville 30 points... everyone was livid."I said with a slight laugh shaking my head at the memory,"the whole of Slytherin house felt that I had been cheated out of points- they even had the thought to rally in front of Dumbledore's office and demand I'd be awarded more points than Ron."

We shared a moment of silence before McGonagall said,"Why you aren't returning to Hogwarts...?"

I looked down with a deep sigh,"I think it's about time I give up delusional hope... even now there is no chance of me getting into St.Mungos... there's nothing left for me here."

"There will always be something for you here at Hogwarts."She said with certainty.

"You know why I can't come back, Professor."I said giving my back to the bookcase.

"You and George have suffered... immensely... but Hogwarts has always helped you find strength... and you'll be safe here..."She said.

I shook my head,"I'm afraid I no longer have a place here at Hogwarts... coming back here will only make my pain worse.."

"You're afraid of the past."She said knowingly,"...That's why you didn't like when I used your last name... You wish to get rid of it, am I right?"

"I do..."I nodded.

"Then by all means... do it... I know of no one more suitable to carry that name than you... but changing your name will not change who you are nor what you've been through, Miss Evans..."

"But it will keep me from feeling the pain of being reminded of what I've lost every single time someone speaks my name... the little I can control... I will take hold of it... I won't lose anymore... I can't lose anymore."I shook my head.

"I wish that you won't..."She nodded sincerely, and placed a hand on my shoulder,"You have a tough road ahead... but Hogwarts will always be here to welcome you home."

I smiled sadly and she patted my shoulder,"Come, George is waiting for you in the Entrance Hall... don't worry- everyone is busy in the Great Hall... it was prepared to allow Potter to escape."

I followed her upstairs to see George sitting at the top of the steps of the dungeons waiting for me with a worried look on his face but as he heard us approaching he shot up and rushed down the steps to meet me with a hug.

"Don't ever runaway from me- Hide away from me like that again- We promised. We promised we'd share everything- do everything together."He scolded me but didn't let go of me.

I rubbed his upper back comforting him, I could feel his very body shaking with worry,"I'm sorry- I'm so sorry, love..."

McGonagall gave me sad smile; she could see as much as I could how dependant George has become upon me and I was slowly starting to worry that maybe that wasn't such a good thing...

"I'll assure no one sees you leave, then."Professor McGonagall said and smile at both of us as George pulled away to look at her,"It was great seeing you both... I wish you the best of luck with reopening the shop... but remember Weasley products are still banned from Hogwarts."

"Right"George and I said with a small laugh.

At the burrow we were greeted with  warmth as usual and it was rather bizarre to see the Grangers- though they were quite surprised to see one ear-less George and Hermione's scarred up friend- glad they didn't see me with red eyes would've scared them off for good, though after the initial shock they were actually very kind, we had never actually had much conversation with her parents as the only time we saw them was when they picked up Hermione from the platform.

"Hermione says you're like her- got non-magic folks like us."Her mother said to me over dinner.

"Oh."I said shocked at the sudden statement.

"Mum."Hermione said, giving her a look as if they had spoken about bringing up certain subjects.

"I'm just curious, Hermione- maybe we could meet them and make friends."

"We spoke about-"

"I-It's alright."I shook my head giving them a soft smile to keep them from arguing,"Um, yeah...my parents are muggles- non-magic folk, but, um, I-I don't know where they are."

"Oh."said Hermione's father concerned,"I thought everyone was reunited? No more hiding?"

"They're not hiding anymore."I said before Hermione could say anything with a sudden surge of anger but with a composed voice,"they hate magic- so they've gone..."

"Oh I'm sorry... we didn't know."Hermione's mother apologize.

"No It's alright- It's no secret."I said giving them a small smile shaking away the anger messing with the food,"I'm sure you have a lot of questions... it's rather strange, isn't it? It's a whole different world."

They seemed a bit weary as I continued to speak casually as if I hadn't just said my family ran off, but it was true. The moment they were released of hiding they left- didn't ask if we survived, if anyone was hurt; took off the moment they were able to leaving Harry and I behind probably to start a new life away from us; without magic. 

"Yeah."Hermione's father said taking lead,"It still feels unreal even though we've known for ages now... But we're so proud of Hermione."

"You should be."I said kindly,"Brightest witch of our age..."

"She's just being kind."Hermione shook her head.

"She isn't."Harry pipped in,"Hermione is quite talented- incredibly intelligent; she was top of our class for such a long time along with Eli."

"Is that so?"Her parents sounded surprised like if Hermione hadn't shared this with them. I presumed there was a lot Hermione didn't share with her parents about the Wizarding world to keep them from being too confused or afraid, but presumed now that her and Ron were dating and they would no longer be in danger... she wanted to be honest and share with them.

"Yeah we both made a competition out of it; different houses and all just to see who could come out on top next year."I shared with her parents.

"A competition between us two only; but was quite the challenge."Hermione said to me, feeling at ease now seeing I was making the dinner run rather smoothly.

"Different houses? So that must mean you're in one of the other three."Mrs. Granger said curiously,"makes sense why you're the only one not in red."

"You must be in slitheen."Mr. Granger pointed as if he connected the dots, the Weasleys found his mistake funny and Hermione was embarrassed but that was enough to cause the tension to die down and everyone began their own conversation as I continued mine.

"Slytherin- yes."I corrected kindly,"I'm a Slytherin."

"That's fascinating.. You know Hermione says there's a lot of jobs the wizarding world offers, Arthur- is there a medical field?"Mrs. Granger asked curiously.

"Medical field? Well we've got healers, of course!"Mr. Weasley perked up at the sudden attention from the muggles.

"Healers? You mean doctors?"

"Oh no. Merlin no."Mrs.Weasley shook her head.

"It's kind of like that."I cut in before Mrs. Weasley could explain the terror wizards feel for muggle doctors,"... different practices. It's just as difficult though long process; many qualifications."

"You could do that, Hermione, dear- go into the medical field like us-"

"Mum."Hermione said, clearly upset causing her mother to stop.

"I was only saying.."

"You seem to know a lot about uh...healers- is that what you're planning on doing?"Mr. Granger asked trying to keep them from arguing.

"um... At one point yes I did- nearly go into a program."I nodded.

"At one point? Not anymore?"He asked curiously.

I took a deep breath and smiled,"Not anymore... "

"Dad."Hermione said, she was clearly under a lot of stress

"Mr. Granger, I'm sure you like football."I said changing the subject,"Have you heard of Quidditch?"

"What's that?"He asked shaking his head.

"You haven't told 'em what Quidditch is?"Ron exclaimed to Hermione.

"I didn't think they'd approve."

"Let me tell you about Quidditch, Mr.Granger."Ron started and I took the opportunity of the shift in focus to excuse myself needed to take a breath of fresh air.

I paced around the back of the burrow when the door opened behind me and Hermione came out,"I am so sorry about them-"

"Don't even apologize It's alright- it's fine- Hermione."I stopped her from rambling apologies,"It's fine. They're curious. They don't know anything- it's normal."

"But I told them something aren't okay to mention, I shouldn't have brought them; they could ruin Harry's birthday, how could they think of asking you those things- My god, they're so embarrassing- I can't believe this."She sat down her head in her hands, and I sat down next to her.

"I've already forgotten, okay? It's not a problem- I was just taken back, okay?,"I rubbed her back,"It's your parents first time in a house full of witches and wizards and I think they're handling it amazingly well. Your parents are trying to be understand this part of your life; Understand and get to know your friends and their families. Parents can be difficult, we both know that, but they're making an effort- you know my father threw plates at Mr.Weasley when he tried fixing my brothers tongue when he ate one of Fred and George's Ton-Tongue Toffee- his tongue got to be four feet long before he could even help them."I said remembering how mortified I was that day.

"He threw plates at them?"She asked with wide eyes.

"Dad was livid thought he was defending his family from the 'evil wizard'- mum was absolutely terrified; she acted like Mr. Weasley was a rabid dog- practically crushing my brother to death trying to cover him."I explained remembering the scene very clearly,"believe me your family is no way as embarrassing as mine. Yours is in there at this very moment after everything that happened trying to make the best of it, trying to do what's best for you- maybe their standards for you were always a little too high and unrealistic even now when they don't understand the half of it... but they're here."

"... I just... I tried my best to keep them happy,  keep them safe; keep both lives separated- but it's hard... they never know what to say to their muggle friends when they ask about me, they always wanted me to follow their footsteps, run the family business, you know... I've always been proud to be their daughter... but we're so different."She shook her head.

"Of course you're different. You're a witch."I told her,"Explain to them how it is in our world... how it works... show them. They're good people, even if it doesn't make sense or they won't completely approve of all wizarding world's thoughts and point of views- they'll still love you at the end of the day, won't they? I mean, come on, it took what seven years, nearly eight for them to come visit the burrow? Last time we really had any word with them was when you brought them to Diagon Alley... You don't need to hide your life from them anymore, Hermione... they're safe now."

She sighed but nodded, running a hand through her hair,"I know... thank you..."

"Of course, us 'mudbloods' have to look out for each other, don't we?"I nudged her at the word and she laughed.

"The word never bothered you?"She asked curiously.

"Oh no- It did."I shook my head,"I hated it... but I was in a house where a little half of it's students had Deatheater parents or had those thoughts themselves... I heard all kinds of whispers about their thoughts on the first year muggleborn- though I wasn't the first or the only one to go through that and certainly won't be the last. I heard the same whispers about the filthy half-breed in their midsts... now that one I could never detach myself from. But mudblood... after a while I sort of desensitized myself from the word... doesn't mean anything unless it's coming negatively from the mouth of someone I care about- Draco and I used to call each other Mudblood and Pureblood for most of fourth year... then we stopped all together... after that he realized why I did it... and swore to never use the word again... all my friends did and I never heard it again..."

"Your own house would use it against you?"

"No."I said immediately,"There was those who were pro-pureblood and the rest who just didn't care. People didn't even hate Harry until Gryffindor won the house cup and I was only awarded 20 points. You know there's always been a competition between the two houses; Gryffindors always think we're the bad guys because they only follow the narrative Fed my blood supremacist."

Hermione looked at me curiously like she had never thought of it or even bothered to research it,"How so?"

"You really didn't do more research after second year? I couldn't stand not knowing the purpose of the chamber that wasn't from Voldemorts mouth.... It's no secret that Salazar Slytherin hated muggles but who can blame him at those times they did burn and hunt our kind for centuries- but most stories we hear are told now by Pureblood Supremacist who move it to fit their narrative. The chamber wasn't to kill muggleborns- though he did not trust them- it was supposed to serve as a defense for the castle against outside attacks not only of muggles but wizards too- there was fear of persecution between Hogwarts own walls by the hand of its own students; but the chamber was believed to nullify the belief of possible treason from muggleborns... it was a failsafe... It's an unwritten rule Slytherin follows to this very day: do not fight without reinforcements; assurance you have the ambition to win."

"I mean it wasn't right."I admitted,"it would've been genocide; no different of what the muggles were doing, but I understand what he tried to do. His ambition to keep magic pureblood was at a time where it was probably a heavily considered option for the wizarding world's safety; then now you have people like Voldemort who took his fear and paranoia as pure hatred."

"Wow..."Hermione said taking in what I've said,"How did you find all of this?"

"Research through books in our common room... there was some that Salazar himself placed in there; they're difficult to get a hand on though, you have to ask head of house and all prefects- it was a pain."I rolled my eyes.

"I never really thought of it."Hermione said,"But I guess it does make sense. A lot of history is often-"

The door opened behind us before we could continue our conversation of History, Harry came stepping out looking at us concerned.

"You alright?"He asked.

"Yeah."Hermione and I said, but Hermione seemed to share a look with Harry before she hugged my side and stood up heading inside.

Once she closed the door behind her Harry said,"...It's odd seeing her parents here, isn't it?"

"Yeah..."I said gently,"Really makes you think, doesn't it?"

He looked confused but sat down besides me taking Hermiones spot,"What do you mean?"

"What could've been..."I shrugged,"For both of our families... how it would've been if our mums got along... how different it would be... who knows maybe in another life- Hermione's parents and mine could've been best friends.. and yours and the Weasleys would've been a perfect fit."

"Yeah..."Harry said amused,"Can you imagine trying to explain to Uncle Vernon about Quidditch?"

I laughed covering my face, I could see my father's mortified face turning purple at the explanation of bludgers.

"Dad was always such a coward.."I shook my head looking down,"Never mind... it's your birthday we shouldn't be talking about this."

"You know we can talk about it."Harry said to me with a soft nudge,"About your family... I know how it feels-"

"Harry."I said cutting his word, it only made me feel angry and hurt; it made me feel that same guilt I did when I was a child about having parents when he didn't, now that we both technically don't have any in our lives- I still do. They're alive. His aren't. I have to live with the memories and knowing it was my parents choice to not be in my life. His parents didn't have a choice.

"It's fine."I said with a sigh and shook my head,"I don't wanna talk about them... I never wanna talk about them... never again... I've... I've decided to change my last name."

"You... what?"He asked confused at the sudden confession,"To what?"

"Elizabeth Lily Evans."I said with a sigh of somewhat relief,"It's my family name too..."

"But you said you didn't want connections to your mother?"

"My mother isn't an Evans."I spat angrily but took a deep breath pushing the anger back in,"She is a Dursley. She made it perfectly clear... I'm taking it after my aunt... after your mother and our grandparents... we might've never known them... but we know they would've love us..."

"Do love us."Harry corrected taking my hand and pulled me into a hug,"I think mum would like it... you taking her name..."

I closed my eyes trying to hold back my emotions as I leaned against Harry, he couldn't see my face so he pushed on what he wanted to speak about in the first place.

"Why did you run away at the ceremony?"

I sighed heavily,"You can't just ask me to stand in front of a crowd like that, Harry. You should probably even stop associating yourself with me; Rita Skeeter is itching to write an article on your werewolf cousin... and I'm not exactly innocent."

I groaned in annoyance putting my head in my hands on my knees,"It's only getting worse."

"You know I can speak for you at your hearing with the ministry... like I did for the Malfoy's,"Harry patted my back,"Get it out in the clear-"

"I don't even want to step foot in the ministry."I exclaimed and ran a hand through my hair in frustration,"George has been speaking to Kingsley about changing my name; they only need me to sign a few papers and say yes and he'll make it happen- no need to go in."

"There's only so long you can evade it."Harry said knowingly.

"I know."I said sharply,"After the shop opens... we'll go after the shop opens... after everything is settled... you showing up at the Ministry won't go unheard... there will be reporters-"

"Kingsley won't allow it... and I'll go with my cloak..."Harry rubbed my back comfortingly and kissed my head,"You've taken care of me for years... it's my turn...I promise I won't let anything happen to you, let me help you."

"I'm worried what it will do to you... to everyone else."I shook my head,"What if they make me isolate in Azkaban-"

"Out of the question."

"Umbridge vouched for me when I signed the Werewolf registry."I said loudly.

"What?"Harry said confused.

"She'll be called... she can say I threatened her that is enough to get me in Azkaban with her: because I am and was a 'Threat to wizard kind.' Regardless if she helped Voldemort or not they'll take her word- I'm the common enemy."I said through gritted teeth.

"But you didn't- you did?"Harry looked at me with wide-eyes,"But how?"

"I told you she used Veratiserum... it's illegal."I said with a sigh,"I blackmailed her... told her I'd go to the minister of magic with proof that I actually didn't even have to get her fired."

"I... We can find a way. Maybe she won't be called... power in numbers right? She's one and we're many."Harry assured me, but I was all that sure it would guarantee much.

"Right... Let's stop talking about this, yeah? It's your birthday. Lets go and enjoy it."I said standing up pulling him up with me,"Let's go birthday boy."

We went inside where the burrow was lively for the first time in a while, it was filled with loud conversations and laughter, I was surprised to see Ginny, Bill and George all having a rather lively conversation as Harry pulled us up to them.

"Hey."George wrapped his arm around me kissing my cheek,"Everything okay?"

"I'm alright."I smiled softly,"What are you guys talking about?"

"Mum made dessert in front of Mrs.Granger when she offered to help out; her reaction was hilarious."Ginny explained with a laugh.

"I bet."I smiled softly,"Looks like your dad's having lots of fun with Mr.Granger."

"We should do this more often, Hermione."Ginny said.

"We were planning on playing exploding snap- or maybe show Mr.Granger a round of quidditch."Bill said brightly,"You and George can be beaters-"

"Actually."George said,"We've got to get going soon."

I looked at him surprised, I wasn't expecting him to say that.

"We've got to childproof the flat before teddy comes over."He said, which true, though we weren't expecting Andromeda till the afternoon and we had plenty time to prepare.

"Yeah, next time though- We can make teams."I said nodding.

"You're babysitting?"Ginny asked curiously.

"Just for two days."I nodded softly,"She asked me to."

"I'm glad she's taken a liking to you- Sirius must've spoken about you."Mr.Weasley said,"Does her good to have a break."

"She hasn't asked me to babysit and I'm The Godfather."Harry said.

"I am the godmother."I said defensively,"and she thinks it will do me good... and besides with your track record- babysitting probably isn't your strong suit."

"You're one to talk- you've never even seen an actual baby; you don't even know how to babysit-"

"I do; I babysit you, cousin."

"You should see her when teddy is around- she's either in a panic or cooing over him- no in between."George commented,"She's been reading wizarding baby books."

"I've never taken care of a baby before."I exclaimed,"Muggle babies are dificult as it is- let alone a wizard baby is terrifying; but a Metamorphmagus? What if he turns into a toad accidentally and hops out into Diagon Alley- we're not far from the apothecary shop. We can't even leave our wands laying around-"

"Oh... you are in for it, dear. Muggle babies are one things but wizard babies-."Mrs.Weasley said with a laugh and George shook his head amused at my mortified face.

"He's only four months old."I said with assurance that would make it easier,"I don't think he'll be much trouble, after all he's Remus son."

"He is also Tonks son."Ginny said.

"Oh god."

"I'm sure we'll manage... I've raised two children."George said said messing up Ginny's hair who would usually fight it but seemed glad to see it happening,"but we should get going still got a lot more to do."we said our goodbyes and left before the cake was even cut.

I didn't question George as to why he wanted to leave so soon, though I had a feeling he wanted to speak to me.

He would not stop watching me as I took off my makeup and I sighed turning back to him,"What is it? What's bothering you?"

He took a second but said,"why won't you open up to me?"

I was taken back but shook my head,"What do you mean?"

"I know there's a lot going on... but you haven't told me anything... something is bothering you and you won't tell me."He said messing with the bandage on his missing ear- I had managed to keep my promise to Fred and fix his ear... for the most part. Instead of a hole on his head, he had a badly scarred ear- and he still remained deaf from that ear.

"Don't mess with it."I said grabbing his hand,"You'll make the stitching weird."

"I don't care.."He said pulling my hand away from covering his ear,"Don't change the subject."

I sighed,"I'm sorry...I know... we promised."

I wanted to be transparent with him but the last thing I wanted was to push my problems onto him, but his eyes were filled with betrayal at the mere thought of me keeping secrets from him.

"I told Harry I would change my name today... he said it would be a good idea... and... he said he'll speak at my review with the Werewolf capture unit...."I admitted.

"Your review..."He repeated in a whisper,"...that's good. Very good right? It probably won't even be necessary."

He was optimistic... there was no point in me spewing my anxiety on him.

"Yeah."was all I could manage and I cupped his face in my hands,"I'm fine, Georgie. I've taken care of myself for a long time... I'm okay."

"But now you have me... I know you're not used to talking about your problems, but I want to know what you feel... what you think... I can handle it."He told me taking my hands away from his face wanting me to take his words seriously.

"I know..."I said truthfully,"Thank you..."

"I love you."
"I love you too- Let's go to bed; we'll need the energy for when Teddy arrives."

George is right; I get far too anxious about Teddy coming to visit. I blocked off the door to the shop with a table and assured all the sharp objects were taped down in drawers. Visions of horror muggle films I've seen flashing like nightmares.

"It's a child- a baby."George said to me with amusement as I flipped through the Wizard baby book,"he's not dangerous."

"I've listened to enough terror stories about you and Fred as babies to know what to expect- Take off that blue shirt, Andromeda said colors make him change and it takes forever to change back and he's sensitive to blue and pink."I said and pushed him back gently.

"Love,"He laughed putting his hands on my cheeks,"It's gonna be fine... it's just two days, and I've got experience... no child can be worse than Fred and I."

I relaxed at his assurance,"Yeah..."

Then the doorbell filled the room, George laughed at the panic filling my face as I pushed him towards our bedroom shouting,"Shirt. Shirt."

"I'm going- I'm going."

I took a deep breath before rushing to open the door waving my wand to assure everything was in place, and opened the door to see Blaise.

I huffed in distress and relief,"Blaise? What are you doing here?"

"We've got to talk."He said seriously.

I sighed and pulled him in,"Get in- I'm expecting a child to arriv-"

"You're pregnant?"

"No. God no- my godson is coming."I said and pointed at his shoes,"Off- I just cleaned the floors."

"Are you serious?"He asked confused,"Okay, fine."

He took off his shoes and I dragged him to the living room,"What is it then?"

"Okay, well I've been doing research for the moon and-"

"Seriously? Can't this wait? I have two days till the cycle begins-"

"Your red eyes will come back."

I stopped looking at Blaise with confusion and fear,"What?"

"They'll come back... after the moon and won't go away for what I think could be a month- it's called Wolf-Spirit Assertion; Your curse- the wolf is getting stronger, I've been reading into the eyes; it is how it shows it's level of strength, you are at the top and now that you are alone it is on edge. You will become more dangerous and blood-thirsty and you'll lose your mind for a longer period of time... it says that sometimes you can even get stuck..."

"As...a wolf?"I asked shakily.

"Yes... it hasn't happened yet- but it is said the wolf has the power to transform even out of the moon during this period if the humanity is weak enough..."

"But what caused it? Why now?"

"Look Ive read that it only happens to red eyed werewolves because you're considered Alphas- your wolf is fighting for dominance over you. There's a whole lot of this we never even considered to be real... just theories- it blames you for all the loss thinks you're incapable of running a pack or let alone yourself. It's afraid you're too weak."

"I.. but I have my review the week before Hogwarts goes back into session- less than a month from now- I have to open up the shop after the full moon."I shook my head and began to pace,"Blaise I can't have this- it doesn't make sense- I don't care about the power-"

"During the full moon it will become more hostile... she's been lying- everyone has. Or maybe they don't know- you told me they said hallucinations were part of the curse that they'll go away; but it never goes away... at least not for Alphas, In a pack it's easier because it eases the wolf that's why you say transformations with Remus and Sirius were easier but alone- it will use it to rip you apart not help you, that's what it's been doing- your wolf is trying to break through you- it's human shell."

"I know...I know..."I said truthfully,"I know... I can feel it... but what am I supposed to do? How do I stop it?"

"...it wants to be able to transform at its own will out of the moon... which will cause you to either fully or partially transform involuntarily... it won't just be you being angry and lose your cool... you can actually be motivated to hurt- it can gain increasing dominance over your thoughts and actions in your human form- it'll gain that dog-like mindset-"

"Stop. Stop."I covered my ears sitting down,"Please stop."

He stopped but I knew he wanted to continue to explain.

"I know, Blaise... I know it's getting stronger.."I sighed looking up at him,"I can feel it clawing away at me... I can feel myself getting angrier every day... hopeless... but I can suppress it... I have been..."

"Good... but there's more..."

"I don't want to know... not yet."I shook my head,"I just want to have a normal life...okay? I'll survive this somehow... I always do."

"But we have to prepare... my animagus is a cat- I'm no help... maybe George can-"

"No. No way in hell, you're insane for even offering that."I shook my head.

"Okay, well the only person I can think could help is Draco."He said.

"No... we'll do this... I'll do this."I shook my head,"You said it yourself... it's me it wants... so I'll handle it."

"But it knows how to crumble you- it's been doing it since Fenrir got his hands on you... its warping you're thoughts- using your pain against you... it's weaponizing your humanity."

"Then I'll use it as a weapon too... or I'll talk sense into it... and if you want to help me then Okay- but I am not running back to that ferret."

"Hey, I found these in your drawer- oh Zabini..."George came out with the brightly colored muggle kid toys I had bought for teddy in his hands,"Whats going on?"

"Just talking about preparation for the full moon.."I said truthfully and took the toys from his hands,"They're too bright- he'll turn blue."

"That sounds cute."

"I don't want to turn him in as a blueberry. Away they go."I put them in a drawer and shut it.

"First time with a wizard baby."George explained to Blaise who was confused.

"Oh... I've never taken care of one either- only child."Blaise explained to George,"Well I'm sure I've got step siblings somewhere but never met any."

The doorbell rang once more.

"Fuck- okay, that's her. No cursing, no bright colors, and wands out of reach."I demanded as I headed towards the door, I took a deep breath.

"Everything will be okay."George assured me.

"Shirt, love."I pointed just realizing he had pulled on a bright orange shirt.

He smiled and turning back to our bedroom to change and I opened to door to see Andromeda holding Teddy's carrier.

I smiled softly,"Come in, Come in, let me carry him, you must be tired."

I took the carrier off her hands as she came in and she set down the diaper bag looking around the room curiously. I cleared my throat rushing up the steps behind her.

"These stairs are unsafe- why don't you have a second door?"She questioned as I set the carrier down in the living room sofa.

"Oh- oh, um I can get some of the baby gates-"

"Baby gates? What are those? Are you thinking if caging my grandson?"She questioned heavily.

"No- no, they're just these little doors to keep kids out of places, My Mum had them when I was a kid."I explained in a rush.

"Very well... get those. Now, I will not be available- but I presume you're smart enough to care for a child... I see you've recruited help, who are you?"she eyed Blaise curiously.

Andromeda was a very kind woman but when it came to her grandchild she did not mess around, she likes to be particular and only wanted the best for Teddy, she was very weary on who and what she allowed around him.

"Oh yeah- Blaise Zabini, um, Blaise this is Teddy's grandmother... Andromeda Tonks."

"Zabini..."Said Andromeda,"As in Signora Zabini?"

"Yes, she is my mother."Blaise nodded politely.

"Hmm."Andromeda didn't seem to have such a good liking towards Blaise,"So you two are friends?"

"Yes, we went to Hogwarts together..."I nodded,"He's always lending me a helping hand for...the full moons... he only came by to speak about it."

She seemed impressed by this and smiled upon seeing George coming to view with a black shirt on,"Oh there you are love, how are you?"

She loved George. She was like another Mrs.Weasley, she felt like the three of us who had suffered a lot at the hand of the war could build a little family and grow strong with Teddy... she said that's what Remus and Tonks felt would be best for him... and for her.

"I'm alright... how are you?"He hugged her.

"Oh I've been better... i think I've got a cold coming on."She said to him.

"Oh no, mum can help you out with it, she knows all sorts of remedies- maybe when you come back I'll have it ready for you."George offered.

"That would be good... I won't be gone long... just need time..."She said gently.

I rubbed her arm knowingly,"No need to explain... I'm sure we'll be alright... you go and take some time to yourself, get some rest."

"I should warn you, he's been showing signs of infant magic- your wands should not be-"

"Nowhere in sight, not a problem- I grew up without one, I can manage without one."I assured her.

"Very well, then- I should get going."She said.

"You don't want some tea or something for the road?"I questioned following her down the steps.

She shook her head,"I trust my daughters judgement- You are gonna do just fine... just don't make me regret it."

"I won't."I shook my head.

"Just remember Teddy needs to..."As she began to ramble on the necessary cautions I needed to take with Teddy and kept going until the door closed behind her.

I took a deep breath of relieved before crying filled my ears from upstairs. My eyes widen in a panic and I scrambled up the steps slipping the final few steps and had to push myself up on my hands to make sure I didn't fall and got to the living room to see George holding Teddy trying to comfort him and Blaise staring at the baby like if he was about to explode.

"What happened?"I asked taking Teddy from George and kissed his head, it seemed to calm his loud cries which turned to little sniffles as I cradled him against my chest.

"I just sat down- I- I and he screamed."Blaise said with wide eyes.

"He woke up."George said amused at his scared look,"Have you seriously never seen a baby?"

"No- not everyone has a dozen siblings, Weasley."Blaise said.

"But seriously not even a friends baby? Or your mothers friends children?"

"No-"

"Shut up, you two."I hissed as Teddy began to stir again at their loud voices,"Let's just have some tea or coffee or something- I can't set him down so you two do it- peacefully."

They looked at each other for a second and I sighed heavily,"It shouldn't take two purebloods to set a kettle."

"I-it's not cause we're pureblood- oh he's not sleeping."

"What?"

Teddy started making babbling noises when I looked down to see he was indeed wide awake and reached up for my face, his hair turned orange at the sight of me and I laughed softly pulling his hand down,"You aren't sleeping? Did the big meanie wake you?"

"I'm not a meanie."Blaise defender himself.

"Aww the big meanie woke you up."I pouted lifting teddy up and he giggled as Blaise looked at George with a offended glance, but George just patted his shoulder leading him towards the kitchen,"It's a fight you won't win."

"Let's get you back to your natural hair."I sighed heavily and began to flip through the baby book,"What do you think we need to do, Teddy? Hmm? How do we go back to dark brown?"

Blaise ended up having to stay and help us take care of Teddy because midday we got a delivery of products to the shop and I had to deal with the delivery movers when they tried to overcharge George for something, but I guess scars are enough to scare them but not enough to keep them from not pick an argument. I left Blaise to take care of Teddy as George had to assure the product was properly brought in and I was trying not to lose my temper.

"This wasn't an issue before."I said sharply,"Besides we expected it to be delivered two weeks ago-"

"No- we were scheduled for today, and indoor delivery is an extra charge-"

"We've had things delivered in this manner and it is always the same price- why suddenly se enough overcharging without even a proper notice after clearly in the original parchment it is printed it was scheduled for two weeks ago."I said with annoyance.

Sudden crying filled the air as the man argued we had to pay him extra as Blaise came down the steps of the shop to see what was taking us so long and Teddy was crying his head off because Blaise was holding him out like he was Pansy's black cat that found its way to his dorm at night.

I groaned holding my head,"Enough!"

Everyone but Teddy came quiet and I held my arms out for him which Blaise immediately handed to me and I tried to soothe him turning to the delivery man,"Look it is clearly a late delivery, I have all the documents this fall on the behalf of your company and I refuse to pay you extra for shitty service-"

"I understand."He said to my surprise,"It must've been an oversight- I'm sorry, we'll take it up with the company and assure you recurve a refund for the delivery."

"Oh..."I said confused,"Thank you."

"Sorry for the hassle folks."The delivery men all left the shop and I turned to George confused,"What the hell just happened?"

"I believe they think you're a struggling pair of first time parents- I tell you nothing scares a wizard like a child."Blaise said, he then pointed at teddy who was giggling up at me pulling at my hair,"But he seems to like you... also he pooped."

Then there smell hit me and I groaned,"Yeah, noted- oh god, what did you eat? Oh don't you turn orange- nooo!"

"He's gone orange."George said.

"I can see that, George- oh no now he's going pink- why did you bring him down here?"

"He looks cute."Blaise said.

"I'll turn your hair pink- go help George."

"Am I being paid?"

"You won't be killed."

"Alright then."

Blaise and I left the day the cycle began and Teddy was taken home, having Lee and Angelina stay with George for the week.

Blaise and I headed back to Remus' Cottage this time we assured to put up protective charms and got to cleaning the little cottage.

"You know I could have this place fixed up, isn't it a little too rundown?"Blaise asked as I fixed my bedroom.

"No. I want to keep it this way."I shook my head,"It was his house... Teddy might want to visit some day..."

"Would that be a good idea?"Blaise asked concerned.

"...Harry wanted to visit Godric's Hollow... I never thought about visiting... but it makes you feel close to them... for a second... and there's a lot of memories here..."

"It's still a little... you know."

"Just go down to the muggle shop and buy some food."I pushed the muggle money into his hands.

"Why do I have to do it? I don't know what half of that stuff is."He exclaimed and I thought back to what happened the last time I went to that shop.

"Just don't say anything stupid, get the things on the list I wrote you, you know how to read right? Hand him the money, don't freak out over the scanner and come right back here."I instructed him, he rolled his eyes muttering about how he was perfectly capable of running errands, but when he came back in a panic proceeded to tell me how he got stuck trying to understand how the muggle drinks that the owner thought he was foreign and couldn't read the labels and grabbed everything on the list for him.

We spent a week in the cottage keeping our eyes out to assure we weren't being followed and trying to perfect the potion and keep it from turning my hair white again.

"Okay... we should be fine... are you sure you want those things... they'll hurt."Blaise said as I tossed down the chains.

"I think it may be best... Or would it only make it worse?"I asked him, nervously.

"Let's see- put a wolf who wants freedom in chains, can only end well, right?"He said sarcastically.

"I don't want to let it roam free."I sat down bitterly.

"I don't think you have much choice... it'll be fine- we're far from the muggle village- it's all trees from all around, that's why we flew here on my broom."Blaise said.

"You're pretty stupid for staying with me."I told him.

"Someone has to take care of you."He shrugged,"I find myself a professional in dog sitting."

I gasped in shock and felt myself choke on my laugh,"What did you just say? ZABINI!"

"I mean- it's true."

"I find that very offensive."I said.

"Yet you laughed."he pointed.

"You do not babysit me-"

"Oh I do, and it's harder than babysitting Teddy."

"I am a grown woman-"I stopped and looked around hearing the distant patter of footsteps, and I signaled Blaise to zip it when he went to speak, he became full alert and had his wand out, the footsteps disappeared but I had a sensation it would come back.

"They found us."I whispered to Blaise,"You're not safe."

"I can defend myself."He shook his head.

"Not once the moon is up."I said sharply and stuffed all of our things into the bag,"Get on your broom, you can fly- werewolves can't."

"Are you sure?"He asked as I handed him the bag.

"Yes I'm very sure- I know you won't leave so at least stay safe- if you get tired get to the cottage, it's safe there."I said to him as I started to hear them returning.

"Remember I'll be here."He whispered and kicked off just as I heard a crack behind me, I turned to see the familiar blonde.

"Karina."I said as she came to stand before me,"About time you came around to find me."

"Don't flatter yourself."She spat,"I could careless about you."

"I know you don't... but Fenrir seems to be obsessed."I said with a smirk,"Sends his little lapdog to find me."

"He doesn't care about you either-"

"Yet he's been stalking me for the past four years."I spat at her,"Don't kid yourself."

"You think you're special? You're just another body that needs to end up in a ditch."She said glaring, her eyes glowed bright blue,"You think your little friend is safe up there... he'll come down eventually... and the moon is coming up."

"Oh darling... I think you have to worry more about getting out of here alive."I sneered glaring at her and she stepped back.

"Y-your eyes..."She said with fear.

I smiled softly,"What? Scared?"

"Fenrir didn't tell us you were... but how could you- you're just a kid- y-you're a girl, Fenrir said women could never be- we're meant for mating."She shook her head.

"There's a reason he's sending his minions after me and not coming for me himself..."I said sharply moving towards her as she stepped back in fear,"He knows he's screwed..."

"How did you even..."

"I didn't do anything... my eyes have always been like this... ever since my first transition... but I was too busy and too young to understand what was coming... you know an alpha doesn't reach their full potential until they are of age... and he lied there's been thousands of women who were the alpha of their pack... Alpha's are born not made..."

"B-but Fenrir said... you were a runt."She shook her head.

"Please- there's a reason why he found me so interesting... a reason why I could take him on when I was only fourteen years old... doesn't it make sense? He's been pushing me to become like him because his pack lacks powerful werewolves like me..."I smirked.

"You don't have a pack... the ones who ran... and escaped they're sparsed through Europe-"

"Yeah I don't have one... at least not anymore... but that only makes me more dangerous don't you think?"I smiled menacingly,"Nothing to lose... not right here- not right now."

"Don't think I haven't forgot that little student your lot did and I think... I'd like to send Fenrir a little message... for killing my friend during the war instead of going for me..."

Fear seemed to fill her entire face but only anger and wild aggression for revenge filled me.

"You... you can't kill me..."She laughed but she seemed unsure,"You can't even kill meat bags."

"I can't you're right..."I said nodding,"I've never killed consciously- not at my own will... but if I can recall... you were there each time Fenrir set me up- you had a hand in almost every single thing that tormented me..."

"Please."She fell to her knees in act of weakness and fear,"I beg you for mercy."

"He killed two of my friends..."I said tears of anger brimming my eyes as the frustration tried to boil over,"I saw what he did to them... I witnessed him... humiliate and literally rip apart an innocent person... and you just stood there and laughed... enjoyed every moment... I can only imagine how many times you've done that or stood in his place... so maybe I can manage to build the nerve to rip your little throat out right now... and if I can't-"

I smiled looking up at moon that was slowly rising,"I'm sure he'll get the message."

"You can't- you can't do it."She begged me tears filling her eyes,"Please... you'll- you'll lose your humanity... he wants you to kill me- you'll fall into his palms."

"Then run."I whispered leaning into her face with an ugly glare yet I could not wipe the smirk,the glow of my red eyes gleamed in her blue ones,"...I think I can forgive myself this once so it won't effect me a bit- so let's have a little hunt, shall we? Have you ever wondered how your victims feel to be hunted helplessly through the woods?"

"I...I'm sorry I'll never do it again- I'll join you- We can start our own pack. I'll serve you."She begged grabbing my arm and I pulled my arm from her reach harshly and pushed away.

"I don't want a pack."I spat bitterly,"I especially don't want you. No you see what's gonna happen is you have five seconds to get up and try to escape... that'll be all the mercy you'll see from me... because if I get my hands on you, Karina... I'll make sure every single one of your victims feels like justice was served."

"You used to be afraid of this... I knew you hated hunts... that's why we always did them."She shook her head as if she didn't believe I could be this way.

"I'm a fast learner."I shrugged,"and I've got more than enough rage to go around- I won't be hunted anymore... I have nothing to fear... but you... oh your nightmare has just started... five... four... three..."

She backed up in terror and scrambled up to her feet rushing forward into the shadows of the forest and I stayed behind hearing her panic breathing faster than her footsteps rushing through the heavy forest.

"...two...one... ready or not, here I come."

The night was a dark blur, I could remember the sensation of feeling free for once... like I could breathe easier and a warmth that comforted my aching heart.

"Elizabeth."

My eyes snapped open feeling something cover my body and I squinted the sunlight out of m eyes to see Blaise looking rather shaken and a little bit roughed up.

"What happened to you- oh god why are my hands bloody."I murmured tiredly.

"You nearly killed that werewolf."Blaise said kneeling down besides me,"She got away in the last minute... she was looking pretty bad."

"Other werewolf?"I asked in a daze and shook my head trying to clear up my thoughts,"um...explain looks."

"Blonde, blue eyes, very weird looking nose with the little little arc going like up like this."He mocked the way the nose was.

"Karina?"I said confused and like if I was working through an equation I managed to remember moments before the moon,"Oh fuck... I threatened her."

"Did you? Well you kept to it."He said shaking his head.

"Did you see?"I asked confused.

"I did a round of the forest trying to see what was going on- how many had come, but it seemed to only be her... at first."He said beginning to heal my wounds.

"What?"I asked confused.

"The one from last time and another one came... that's how she escaped... I tried to help but they came after me so I flew up- but you took on all three of them, and you actually did pretty well."Blaise explained looking at me with concern,"who were they?"

I sighed heavily holding the blanket up to my chest,"Obviously Fenrir's pack... but she is like his... not exactly mate... more like just someone he sleeps with I guess... and she's considered the top female in their pack... now the only female in there- the others well you heard what he had to say and he brought a friend."

"Why do they want to kill you so bad- I get it you screwed their pack but they could just move on."Blaise said annoyed.

"I don't know... I guess he wants me dead because I won't join him."I shrugged,"and I want him dead because he killed my friends."

"You can't really think of killing him..."He said concerned.

"He killed Ally... he tormented me since I turned... he won't hesitate to kill anyone close to me and I'd stop him from ruining more lives."I shrugged,"Yes I want him dead."

"I don't blame you."Blaise said, but I had feeling he was holding back.

"But?"I asked.

"But the wolf clearly has more power than you thought... you didn't even fight it last night, did you?"He asked clearly upset.

"Well... I-I,"

I really didn't have an excuse.

I sighed,"I know- but it felt so good to be in power for once... she was afraid of me! I feel like I realized I'm not the one who has to be afraid... they do."

"Good, you're not afraid... but it's still dangerous- evoking a war with rogue werewolves, there will be a time where you won't go home for weeks, possibly months. You know they get ruthless."Blaise said with concern.

"Maybe It's about time I get ruthless."I said sharply and I stood up groaning slightly at my aching body,"Like I said I'm tired of being hunted..."

Blaise sighed but didn't argue, instead he stood up taking off his jacket and handing it to me,"I agree... you shouldn't be hunted... but I'm afraid for you."

I smiled gently as I zipped up the jacket, I patted his arm," Blaise... you've read what I'm capable of... you've made all this research... I think you know this is my natural nature... I'm being threatened, so I will defend myself."

"And I won't say a word against it."He shrugged,"We still gotta do something about those eyes, they're very scary."

"They're still red?"I asked curiously.

"Glowing red, let's head back to the cottage to see if the potion will work. We can became millionaires with this you know."Blaise said mounting his broom.

"Werewolves are broke as hell, and it's not like the potion heals you in any way, it should only subside side effects of the moon... like wolfsbane potion but aftercare."I pointed brightly.

"If it works... we should sell it, I'm just saying."He shrugged.

I poked him with my sharp name and he yelped,"Just thinking from a business aspect."

"I'll eat you."I joked and he made a face as if he didn't doubt it and before I could shout at him some more he kicked off and I had to grip on to assure I didn't slip off.

By the time we landed and I took a shower, taking care of other wounds he couldn't, Blaise had the potion ready, we sat in the kitchen we had utilized fully this week looking at each other with nervous glances.

"What if I explode?"I whispered.

"I doubt you will... maybe your eyes would."He said in the same terrified tone.

"Okay but... what if I turn white blonde again?"

"How is that worse than your eyeballs imploding?"

"I don't have to live without eyeballs- but I have to live with blonde hair."I said seriously.

"Just drink it."He pushed it towards me, but gripped my hand,"I'll apparate us to st.mungos if you start to die."

"How kind of you."I choked and took a deep breath,"It's fine... just a makeshift potion... that glows a weird pink... that could possibly not do what we think it will... maybe we made an accidental poison... it's fine."

"Bottoms up."Blaise said, holing up his shot glass of dragon's tears tequila.

We clinked our glasses together and downed them at the same time and we both coughed roughly at the burning sensation, I leaned against the counter feeling it burn my insides all the way to my stomach and could feel a chill throughout my body.

"Say a word."Blaise said clearing his throat, shaking my hand.

"A word."I croaked and sat up rubbing my eyes,"God it hurts."

"Well it worked... partly, one eye is red- but look pretty normal besides the scars and if you paint your nails again."He said eyeing me down.

"One eyes is red."I sighed groaning,"so what do we need to do to make it work."

"My guess is it worked... but some might take longer than others to disappear like last time."He suggested.

"But I have the opening tomorrow."I sighed rubbing my eyes hoping it would go away.

"Nothing we can do now, two doses would kill you."He shook his head.

"Worth the risk."I shrugged and he practically pushed me off the chair.

"Go get your stuff, I've had enough of you for a week let me drop you off at your boyfriends flat."He said loudly as I stomped up the steps.

Blaise was saying how excited he was to get rid of me the whole way to the flat but once I unlocked the door was coming up the steps behind me.

I found George sitting with Angelina and Lee in the living room packing up boxes for last minute products, well they should've been but Lee was busy singing along to the radio and Angelina kept tossing little papers at him while George poked at the design of the boxes.

"Busy at work I see."I commented kissing the top of George's head.

"You're back!"The three of them chorused excitedly,"I thought you'd be another hour."

"Yeah, but Blaise has a pretty fast broom-"

"It's me who retains the speed."Blaise said dramatically, sitting down on the sofa.

"sure."I said shortly,"You guys don't have to pack up new products, we've got more than enough for the usual demand."

"We've got a feeling we might sell out products rather quickly."Lee said brightly,"now that you've got Potterwatch advertisements."

"What?"I asked confused, as George gripped my hand.

"Lee asked me to go on the show during the week... so I did, went on as rapier... we advertised the shops grand re-opening and shared news on what's been going on."George explained to me.

"Oh, you did?"I said with a soft smile,"You know I never did get to hear a broadcast."

"What is potterwatch?"Blaise asked confused.

"Its a private radio show."Angelina explained,"Lee made it for all of us to keep tabs on each other, get the real news rather than the crap the ministry tried to feed us- straight from the mouth do the order."

"Oh that's actually very cool."Blaise said impressed,"You know I'd be happy to sponsor you and get you on a public airwave.."

All of us looked at Blaise in surprise and he shrugged,"It would do some good for someone to be the word of reason out there these days, we can keep your location untraceable, but on the wizard airways..."

"Actually, we applied but we were denied multiple times."Lee explained.

"Oh, well you don't have to worry about that."I shook my head,"Blaise never offers if he can't deliver... it'd be cool for you to have your own radio show, Lee!"

"I guess it would..."He smiled softly, but looked at George for his opinion.

"Keep advertising the shop and maybe I'll join in Every once in a while."George said brightly.

"That's cool, Lee! You're gonna have your own radio show! You're gonna be famous."Angelina nudged him.

"The potion didn't work?"George whispered up to me, noting my red eye.

"It did... sort of, it'll go away eventually."I assured him,.

"It's alright."He shook his head kissing my hand.

"I guess we should get out your hair,"Angelina said going to sit up.

"Oh don't- don't leave just cause I came home, let's order out- or I can whip something up, let's have dinner."I suggested feeling like I intruded on them.

"We really shouldn't- you two haven't seen each other in a while."Angelina shook her head.

"We'll hold on."Lee said,"They've offered dinner... least we can do is say yes."

"Alright then, it's settled dinner for five."I said but Blaise grabbed my arm,"I think you need to rest, I'll go pick something up?"

"I'll head with you."Lee jumped up,"I know the perfect place and we can talk business."

Before Angelina could say a word the two boys were already heading down the steps, she smiled at George and I awkwardly.

"Well... we can clean up, if y'all plan to stay the night for the opening tomorrow I can manage to get a few blankets and set the sofa and the office."I offered kindly.

"I can help clean up."Angelina stood up almost immediately,"I'll take these down to the shop."

I nodded as she rushed down the hall and I looked at George with a weirded out glance,"Why is she so jumpy?"

"I warned them about the red eyes.. must freak them out."He said knowingly,"And maybe they don't wanna be caught in the middle of our reunion."

He pulled me down to sit next to him and kissed my face all over making me laugh,"God, you are exactly what I wanted to come home to."

"Are you feeling okay?"he asked worried.

"I'm fine."

"How was it? Any trouble?"He asked, his eyes big with concern as he held me.

I thought back for a second of how I was practically murderous the night before.

"Well...It was okay."I said absentmindedly,"I didn't feel much... at least I don't think I did."

"That's good."He smiled and looked up as Angelina came back in,"We should get to cleaning then."

Having a full house filled that silence with life for the first time it wasn't so sad. They even opted to stay the night and we ended up dragging our mattress to the living room and setting up there. It was odd but fun, at one point we ended up having a little competition Gryffindor vs. Slytherin even though they had one over us, we still managed to win.

We woke early the next morning to my muggle alarm ringing loudly through the flat and everyone groaned as I rolled off the mattress reaching for my wand and with one flick it turned off, and I laid on the floor for a few seconds.

"Time to wake up."I muttered pushing myself up,"big day... mmm"

I flopped myself onto George's back as he whined,"Five more minutes."

"We have to prepare..."I whined but climbed onto his back to shake the others,"Wake up, wake up."

They al began to whine and complain as I slowly began to drift back to sleep on their back but Blaise being well adjusted to my ways rolled me off and I landed on the ground once again between the sofa and the mattress.

"Oi!"I shouted pulling myself up from the tight space,"I'm gonna shower... everyone is gonna be coming to see the shop open up... so go home... shower and come back if you feel like helping out."

"I have clothes here."Lee muttered into his pillow but Angelina was already slipping her shoes on sleepily, Blaise groaned,"cant I just sleep in your bedroom?"

"If you stay you become staff for the day."I said sternly yawning,"you can brew something to fix me though."

"Whatever."He turned on his side, clearly planning on staying a little longer.

Blaise and Lee were our most frequent visitors. They always appeared and stayed at best times even though Blaise was still questioned by most of the Weasleys and the order for his loyalty as his connection to the Malfoy's, they never spoke illy of him to me... I think George is even starting to like having him around.

He was definitely a lot of help setting up the signs for the grand opening as I tried consoling a nervous George who kept pacing back and forth in the back room.

"It's gonna be alright, love."I assured him, watching him pace.

"But- what if I can't handle it? What if it's too much? What if I'm overstepping- it's all gonna crumble, I can't do this, can I?"

"You're staring you sound like me."I said with a soft laugh,"We've got all hands on deck- things should run smoothly... you got this

I stopped him and wrapped my arms around his neck,"We got this... if it gets too much I can take over and you go up and get some rest."

"What did I do to deserve you?"He leaned down placing his forehead on mine.

"Wait for years."I said truthfully and he laughed nodding,"Yeah, I did wait a while didn't I?"

"I'm sorry."I laughed shaking my head,"but now we're together..."

"Thank you for not letting me go through this alone..."He said quietly as I fixed his vest.

"Of course not."I said gently,"That's why I went to buy color contacts; can't be scaring away customers can I?"

"I should throw out these sweaters."He joked.

I shook his shoulders,"Okay enough stalling- let's do this Weasley."

He chuckled at my attempt to hype him up, and nodded,"Let's do it!"

I planted a big kiss on his lips and dragged shin out of the backroom cheering like if we were going for a quidditch match.

It was probably the busiest the shop had ever been, there was a line that reached out further than we could see, George had me stick by his side as most people kept saying they were sorry for our loss or asking where the other Weasley was, it made it difficult to be cheery and bright- though it got easier once everyone came around.

"Oh you did wonderfully."Mrs.Weasley said hugging George as I greeted Andromeda who was carrying Teddy, Harry and Hermione carrying his things.

"You can take him or the things up if you need to, Our bedroom is at the end."I told them, caressing baby teddy's cheeks who cooed loudly his hair turning orange.

"There he goes again."Andromeda shoo her head,"Each time he sees you he goes orange."

"I think it means he likes her."Blaise said as he passed by.

"Definitely does."Andromeda laughed as Teddy basically tried to fling himself to me.

"You can take him to see the kid section, harmless products."I said and she got to showing Teddy around.

I had gotten so focused on the register with Lee at one point that I lost sight of George, I didn't find time to go find him as I got wrapped up by customers.

I did not even get a breath of fresh air until I the crowd died down near nightfall, Blaise came around while I was helping one of the handful of customers pick out something and he whispered in my ear,"I saw him go up about an hour ago... hasn't come down."

I smiled weakly at the customer and turned to Blaise,"Why didn't you come for me?"

"I thought he needed time on his own..."Blaise shrugged,"I'm sure he'll need you now... Lee and I can handle the rest..."

"Thank you... I owe you one."I said.

"Yes you do..."He said taking my uniform apron, I rushed up the steps trying to prepare myself for what I was going to find.

I went to walk toward our bedroom but I heard giggling coming from the closed door of Fred's bedroom.

I stopped confused, I felt like I was going insane for a second but as I pushed dopen the door, I saw George holding Teddy who was giggling his life away with orange hair pulling at George's scarred ear, he was busy making funny faces in the mirror to make teddy laugh.

I cleared my throat and he jumped turning towards the door, his eyes seemed to be red and cheeks stained with dry tears, his nose was irritated.

"He found me."Was all he said.

I smiled softly and walked inside with slight hesitation, the air seemed to be heavier in this bedroom than anywhere else in the house.

"He never stops smiling does he?"I said as teddy made loud babbling happy noises, I wiped the dry tear stains away from his cheeks.

"He came crawling in here... he's not even old enough is he..."George asked softly watching our reflection, tears brimming his brown eyes.

"Some babies develop faster than others... and you seem active enough, don't you Teddy?"I said brightly and he babbled in response grabbing my hair as I kissed his cheek.

"I wanted to be close to Fred... one more time... it felt wrong without him..."George said to me,"...I know we said we wouldn't come in here... but I couldn't help myself... Andromeda has laid him in the mattress in the living room... next thing I know he's climbing on me trying to make me stop crying, his hair going all sorts of colors."

"So you decided to teach him how to do weird faces?"I asked curiously.

"He finds them funny."George said gently, holding teddy softly to his chest, he was settling down as we continued our conversation and was slowly starting to fall asleep.

"Do you think he really changes his hair orange cause of me?"I asked curiously as his hair went pink in his sleep,"...andromeda says it hard changes when he's at home."

"Yeah, i do."George said,"actually I think he does pink cause it reminds him of Tonks... I don't know if he could remember her... but when he's comfortable... or overjoyed he goes pink... like Tonks."

"You think so..."I said sadly, It was hardly possible that teddy would be able to remember Tonks' hair color. I would often show him picture of them, the ones I could find in the cottage and the ones they had left at Andromeda's.

Georges sniffled,"I think I'm down crying for now... I'm sorry I ran away."

"Hey, you did great."I said defensively,"I'm very proud of you... this was the busiest the shop has ever been, and we still have a lot of deliveries- it can be overwhelming."

"You really think we can do this?"George asked concerned,"...Fred would hate me if I can't keep it open... it was our dream for years... Losing the shop... will be like I'm killing him all over again."

"I will never let that happen."I assured him,"might I remind you I was his twin in the end."

He laughed tearfully,"I forgot, I was replaced... I miss him."

"I do too, love."I said truthfully hugging him looking at the photos Fred had placed upon his bedroom vanity, theres was photos of the twins and their friends, multiple photos of the three of us, and baby photos of him and George,"But we'll manage."

We had to manage... it was only the beginning for us. We still had a lot more to overcome and get through. I needed him and he needed me. Without each other we probably wouldn't be able to hold onto the string that is keeping our sanity in tact. We were each other's last hope.