The ride home after the zoo was every bit as awkward as Nova predicted it would be. For the first half of the ride, they barely said two sentences to each other. Even the radio that Q turned on couldn't even out the silence that was beginning to separate them.
Nova just couldn't believe that Brian had so little regard for her employment at her outlet job. She had always felt that she had a career to be proud of, working at the outlet, that it was better than what most people had, but she guessed it was nothing to keep up with everything Brian had going for him. It didn't feel so good.
For the first time since they had started seeing each other, she wondered what the hell she was actually doing with Brian and what she thought that their relationship really was.
A couple of times here and there it would hit her, but she would just push it back down and not let it ruin all the fun they were having. It was hard to think of the future when she was having the time of her life in the present. But really, what did she have to offer him? She was just an average girl with an average life, another face in the crowd. Sure it was plenty good enough for her but after today, she wasn't sure how long it would be good enough for him.
As for Brian, he was disappointed that Nova repelled his offer so hard. He was giving her action, adventure, and an opportunity that he really felt she deserved and was ready for. He couldn't wrap his head around what the problem was. Sure she would have to quit her job, and granted maybe it was spur of the moment, but if only she saw how much she would gain. Plus it drove him nuts hearing about how Glenn always treated her.
He then thought about what she said about how "he was a celebrity and everything just gets handed to him".
He took a deep breath as those words echoed throughout his mind and it fired him up. He gripped the steering wheel tight and gritted his teeth. So that was really how she thought how he got to where he is today...
"By the way, just because I am on TV...Doesn't mean that I didn't have to work hard to get there, since we are in the spirit of pointing fingers right now, that was kinda messed up how you said that" Brian said, abruptly breaking their silence.
Nova snapped her head in his direction. "Excuse me?" She asked, quirking an eye brow at him. "You said that everything has been handed to me, I just wanted to let you know that you are wrong. Me, Joe, Sal, and Murr worked our asses off to get our names out there, harder than you think. Just because you weren't there to witness it first hand, doesn't mean it didn't happen" Q said in annoyance.
Now it was Nova's turn to breathe. She was angry back then when she said all that and was now wishing she could have taken it back. She didn't mean it but it was too late.
Instead of owning up to her nasty words, she decided to take a more opposing approach which again, she would regret later.
"Well ya know, it goes both ways. Just because you have not seen everything I have went through to get to where I am now, doesn't mean it holds any less value than everything you have done in your life. You think I'm just going to throw it all away for what? For some guy that is promising me a potential not even set in stone future that is not a guarantee? Doing what? Filing papers somewhere? Getting coffee for over paid producers? You are not even promising me that I'll be doing any photography related on the set!"
"Nova, come on. Just think about this for a second. You get in anywhere at the network...Anywhere! You will move up! Your work is on point and you have already shot for us before. Plus I will be in Pete's ear the whole time, nagging him to use you on the show. I am asking you to take a chance, you owe it to yourself!" Q argued.
Nova deeply sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "Brian, you are just not seeing the bigger picture of things. If I leave the outlet and get a job at TruTV and something happens with us, then what am I going to do? I need a steady income to be able to afford my apartment and if I miss a beat, I will be homeless! That is a lot to put on the line for someone that I haven't been with for that long, I just can't take that risk."
"Wow...Doesn't sound like you have much faith in us if that is where your mind is going. And for the record, if things did not work out between us, I wouldn't let it effect your employment but it already sounds like they are not so I don't know what the fuck we are doing here." Brian said in anger.
"Well if you are going to be that upset that I am not going with a decision that you are trying to make for me, then I guess I don't know what the fuck we are doing here either." Nova said bluntly, crossing her arms.
Their words cut each other deep. There was still so much more they each wanted to say but they were both exhausted.
Conveniently, Q's red jeep was coming to a rolling stop in front of Nova's building. The moment the car stopped, Nova rushed to take her seat belt off and ran as fast as she could away from Q.
She didn't want him to see her cry.
Brian was speechless from Nova's actions. He wanted to try to say something so they didn't leave off on things being so rough, but she didn't give him the chance as she bolted out of the car. He wasn't sure if letting her was the right decision. He watched her jog up her front steps until she was safely in her building. He took a deep breath and thought "What have I done?"
Several hours later Nova awoke on her couch, bleary eyed and her face sore from crying herself to sleep. She replayed every word they had said to each other over and over again in her mind.
How could she have sounded so hateful towards him?
Granted, it was crazy that he sprung that trip on her last minute like that and she was annoyed that he reacted so strong on her not wanting to go along with it, but deep down she knew that his heart was in the right place.
She had called her mother, Violet, and Heather and dissected her fight with Q with each one, trying to use them to organize her thoughts. Each of them had a different opinion and advice to give on her situation so those conversations didn't do much on helping her figure out who was right.
Maybe he wasn't so crazy after all?
Maybe it was time that she took a chance?
She had been working at the outlet for three years now, and sure she made her way up to lead photographer, but now that she had this position, there was no more moving up. The only other jobs at the outlet where she would move up in rank were nothing photography related and that would not be the direction for her life that she desired.
Nova had always told herself that the sky was the limit and maybe it was time to start thinking about moving on from the Outlet. It was hard for her to take all of this from Brian because the only person she had ever wanted to owe her success to was herself. If she were to follow along with Brian's plans for her, she would always know in the back of her mind that everything she would gain from working at TruTV would be all thanks to Brian, and she always vowed to herself to never give anyone that power over her.
Especially a man!
But this was Brian we were talking about. Her sweet Brian who she knew only wanted what was best for her and who was kind and thoughtful. She knew that he didn't mean her any disrespect and even though trying to get her to go on tour with him the way he did was a bit much for the stage they were at, she came to the conclusion that it was all too silly for it to be enough to completely throw their relationship away.
Maybe instead of quitting the Outlet, she could quit working at The Haunted Star and work at the network part time instead? After the two of them had a thorough talk of course. This way she wasn't putting all her eggs in one basket. She felt stupid that she didn't think about asking him this option before she blew up on him.
Right on cue, she heard a knock at her door. Her heart jumped at the sound and she rushed up from her couch, pinching her clothes into place and running her hands through her hair, trying to fix it the best she could. It was way past dark outside and she knew that it had to be Brian at her door, wanting to make things right just as she wanted to as well.
She just wanted to hug and kiss him and tell him she was sorry for all the rotten things she said. She wanted to wish him well on his tour and even though she still wouldn't be joining him, she wanted him to know that she would still be there for him when he got back. She was thrilled that he was giving her the opportunity.
At least she hoped he was.
Nova hesitated a moment before she opened the door. Her expression fell when Brian's face was not the one that greeted her on the other side.
It was Jimmy Pavo's....
"Jimmy? What are you doing here?" Nova asked, surprised to see him. She gave him a look up and down and realized he didn't look so good.
"Hey, sorry I know it's late. Can I come in?" He asked innocently. Nova furrowed her eye brows. She wanted to tell him no but she had a feeling something was wrong so she went against her wishes and stupidly let him in. "I was just going to make a cup of tea...Do you want some?" She asked, trying to be polite as she led the way to her kitchen.
Jimmy's eyes shifted around her apartment. "You got anything stronger?" He asked with a goofy grin. "Other than a few Smirnoff's, not really" Nova said as she made her way to the counter. Jimmy sighed.
As Nova went about making tea for the two of them, Jimmy began to talk her ear off about what led him to her door. To be honest Nova wasn't quite listening, she had enough on her own plate to worry about and there was something about Jimmy's voice that always made her mind drift.
Granted they were friends and used to be friends with benefits but Nova always felt that he was one of those people that always had something to bitch about. Always in the past when he would vent to her about things, it always seemed that he just wanted someone to complain to. Nova was the kind of person where if you didn't take the advice she was giving you about a problem and use it constructively, she didn't want to hear it. And Jimmy was just that kind of person that she 'didn't want to hear' for that reason.
Tonight it was something about a girl that he was supposedly seeing. He caught her going in a bar with another guy after cancelling plans with him and he was really upset about it. Nova pretended like she was listening intently but in reality, the only persons problems she wanted to deal with right this moment was her own.
"And you know, we went out on three different dates, three dates, three nights. She picked the place every time and guess who paid for it all? Me! What is with you women and the three date rule?" Jimmy went on.
Nova took a sip of her tea and thought "It is probably because that is how long it takes before they can't stand you anymore", to herself.
"I don't know. Maybe she just wasn't feeling the spark, maybe she needed to explore other options. I know plenty of people who date multiple people at a time. It's just casual dating" Nova said with a shrug.
"Well where I come from, you date one person at a time and that is it. It is just common decency to let someone know if you are no longer into them" Jimmy continued.
Nova set his tea down in front of him and made her way around the counter. She put on a fake smile and said "Well I am sorry that you had to go through that, I really am but I don't think I am the person you should be talking to tonight. Let's just say I have had better days in the dating department."
Jimmy raised his eyebrows as he took another sip of his tea. "Oh? What are things not going good with that guy from that show...What was it...?" he started.
"Impractical Jokers" Nova said bluntly.
"Yeah, that guy. So what happened with you guys? I thought you were really into him?" Jimmy asked.
"Well I was...I am...But we kinda got into it earlier today and now I'm not sure what's going on between us" Nova said grimly.
"Hmm...Well that sucks, what happened?"
Nova hesitated before she answered. She didn't feel 100% comfortable talking about this with Jimmy of all people and to be honest she was over talking about it in general for the day. After speaking to her mom and her friends about it, she felt like she just needed to be alone with her thoughts to figure out what she was going to do next.
"Please don't take this the wrong way but I really don't want to talk about it anymore. It's been a long day and I'm just kinda over it all" Nova said, leaning against the counter.
Jimmy blinked at her and shifted his eyes from his mug to her. "Well, since I had a bad day and you had a bad day...How about we help each other turn it around, there are other things we can do besides talk" he said mischievously.
Nova narrowed her eyes, not fully registering what he was saying, until he moved his hand from his tea and rested it on top of her hers.
Nova paused for a moment and looked down at his hand. In the past, she would have jumped and taken him up on his offer without hesitation. After all, that is what they had always used each other for, just a good lay to make all their troubles go away for the night. But tonight, Nova was just not feeling it. She was actually repulsed by the thought.
He was not her Q...Nor would he ever be.
After being with Brian, she didn't really have eyes for anyone else, especially Jimmy. It felt wrong and dirty just with his hand sitting on top of hers as it was. Nova slid her hand away and took a step back, feeling put off by another mans touch.
"You know Jimmy, I'm sorry but I just don't feel like it tonight. I'm pretty tired and mentally exhausted after today. I think I just want to call it quits for the night but I really hope you feel better tomorrow about that girl" Nova said sincerely.
Jimmy looked at her as if he was confused. This was always their routine whenever they each were having relationship issues and he was having a hard time wrapping his head around her sudden rejection. Especially after what he went through tonight.
"Oh come on Nova, I really don't want to be alone tonight. Can't I just stay over like we used to? I'll buy ya breakfast tomorrow morning, it will be fun and I'm sure we will both feel better afterwards, what do ya say?" He continued, taking a step closer to her.
Oddly Nova felt bad at how pathetic he was being but she still didn't have it in her to give in to his wishes. "Jimmy, not tonight. I'm sorry but I am just not in the mood, I really just want to be alone"
She made her way around the counter to try and lead him to the door but as she walked past him he reached out and grabbed her underneath her arm to pull her into him, trying to convince her to let him stay. "Well maybe you're just not thinking clearly" He said in a way that made Nova's stomach turn.
Nova went from polite and understanding to seeing red in an instant. She had zero tolerance for any man putting his hands on her after she said no to their advances. She snapped.
She roughly pried his fingers off her arm and shoved him back, making him stumble off of the stool he was perched on.
"Keep your fucking hands off me you fucking pasty faced son of a bitch! What part of I want to be alone makes you think that you can push your way into my bedroom like a God damn rapist! Do you have any idea how fucking creepy you just sounded?!" Nova yelled, going from 0 to 100 and getting in his face.
Jimmy backed off immediately. He had never seen Nova get like this before and even though he suspected he had went too far, he still fired back at her.
"Whoa whoa whoa, calm down sweetie. I was only trying to make you feel better, don't get your panties in a wad, you were the one who started up this arrangement in the first place" He said holding up his hands in surrender.
Nova felt her face turn red. "Well consider this arrangement over on account of you being a pushy asshole who can't take no for an answer...Get. Out!" Nova screamed.
That little touch already had her feeling like she needed a shower.
Nova stomped over to the door, stepping to the side and looking at him seriously. Jimmy looked at her as if she slapped him across the face.
Maybe she should have.
"Jimmy, I swear if you do not get out of my sight within the next 5 seconds, either I am calling the cops or I will pick you up and throw you out myself" She threatened through gritted teeth, sounding way tougher than she actually was.
Jimmy scoffed and narrowed his eyes at her. "You know, you are a real piece of work" he said, standing up. Nova opened the door and held her ground as he walked past her, glaring at him the whole way.
He walked out the door and before he left, he turned to say "Thanks for the great time" sarcastically to her.
Before Nova could say anything, something caught the corner of Jimmy's eye and he turned his head to look down the hallway. His face pulled up into an evil smirk and he looked back and forth at Nova. Nova blinked and stepped out of her door frame to see what he was looking at and her heart dropped.
There was Q, standing there holding a faux Blue Orchid in his hands, looking like a deer in headlights. Nova's eyes went wide. Granted she did nothing wrong but she knew this scene did not look good in front of Q, especially after everything that happened between them earlier.
Jimmy looked back and forth between Q and Nova, basking in her horror. He smiled sickly and told Nova "You have a nice night" and gave her a little wave. Nova was speechless.
He walked away and right before passing Q, he gave him a look up and down. He patted him on the shoulder and said "She's all yours pal." and then exited in the elevator, leaving Nova to deal with the mess he left behind.
For a moment they both just stared at each other, not knowing what to say. Perhaps they were both in shock. Nova looked down at the plant he was holding and her eyes teared up. She remembered about what he said earlier that day about how he thought flowers was a way to say I'm sorry.
He was coming here to make things right, just as she had hoped. His timing couldn't have been worse...
"Q...Q... I can explain...This is not what it looks like" Nova breathed out, finding her voice, giving him sincere eyes. Q breathed out and as if her voice brought him back down to reality his face went from shocked, to hurt, and then to angry.
He shook his head back and forth and said "God...I'm such a fucking idiot."
He ran a hand through his hair and let out a deep breath. He looked down at the plant and threw it to the ground in anger, so hard that the planter bounced off the ground and hit the wall. He turned and stomped away, power walking to the stairs to get away from Nova as fast as he could.
"Q! Q wait! Please!" Nova called after him. She turned around to put her shoes on but unfortunately they weren't anywhere by the door so she mentally said 'fuck it' and took off after him bare foot.
He was already halfway down the stair well by the time she made it through the doors.
"Q! Stop! Please let me explain! I swear nothing happened!" Nova continued to call out down to him from over the railing but he continued to walk away from her. She had to stop him and tell him it was all a big misunderstanding. She was praying he would just stop and give her the chance to explain.
She felt horrible knowing how bad she had just hurt him and it was completely out of her control. She would follow him barefoot through out the streets of Manhattan all night if she had to, to convince him she didn't do anything with Jimmy.
Nova continued to call out to him as she hurried after him. He exited the doors of her building and walked across the street to where his red Jeep was parked. Luckily there was a break in traffic so he was able to seamlessly get across without missing a beat.
"BRIAN!" Nova called out to him, bursting through the doors. He was already halfway across the street.
Still barefoot and in her pajamas, she ran full speed towards him, hoping to make it to him before he got in his car and it was all over. He just had to hear her out! She was sure he would understand if he just gave her the chance to talk.
Nova called his name out once more and finally Q actually turned around to look at her, one last time.
The next series of events felt like they were happening to someone else. It felt like they were moving slow and fast at the same time and all Brian could do was watch. Nova was about halfway across the street by the time Brian turned around. She was relieved until Brian yelled at her to stop. Thinking it was out of protest, Nova hesitated, thinking he was pushing her away.
She was so determined to stop him, she didn't stop to think to look both ways before crossing a busy street and a car plowed right into her, knocking her to the ground. The last thing Nova remembered hearing was the screech of the brakes, the blaring horn, and Brian yelling out her name...