RIAN
Shiganshina was gone. In all the confusion and chaos only one thing rang true and clear, Wall Maria had been compromised. Within days of the news that Shiganshina had fallen, the central government had made the decision to retreat humanity behind Wall Rose, though little good it did the citizens of Maria. An estimated ten thousand people were eaten by Titans and the refugees, my family and self included, now faced the prospect of starving in the fast approaching winter months.
We had barely survived the horror of that day and thanks to Hannes securing our passage on the evacuation boats we had managed to make it the south side of Wall Rose and had been sleeping in a make shift camp for refugees for the last two weeks but the reprieve had been short lived as several days after humanities domain had been withdrawn behind Wall Rose, all the refugees were forced to labour in the frozen fields to try and produce a food yield regardless of age or injury.
Aurora had been hurt and rendered unconscious in our flight for safety and though her inflictions had not been fatal or particularly serious she had remained unmoving but for her deep breathing for days. Uncle Arlert said it was her spirit that needed to heal and not her body, she had lost too much. We all had. We had looked for Eren's father through the official channels as he wouldn't have been far from Wall Maria when it fell however all inquiries were fruitless, his name was added to the endless list of the missing.
I had sat by Aurora's side day and night with Armin, Eren and Mikasa waiting for her wake. She had slept through our eighteenth birthday and then into the next day and the day after, I had watched her sleep with Eren and Armin snuggled into her sides to keep her warm and Mikasa sat at her head gently stroking her hair all the while fearing that she had given up when suddenly her arms had lifted around the boys and pulled them closer. I knew then that she would be alright and allowed myself to breath.
No sooner had Aurora been back on her feet we were all sent into the fields to cultivate the waste land. Though a food shortage was inevitable we ploughed until our hands split and our backs broke in the hope that maybe this once fate was on our side but of course fate is a fickle bitch and the ground gave nothing.
I slammed my hoe down into the unyielding earth and heaved a sigh looking around me. Everyone was on their last legs; two elderly women had died yesterday, they had collapsed and just stopped breathing, the will to live gone. Garrison guards had walked into the field picked up their bodies and told everyone to continue on while taking the bodies to walls knows where without so much as parting gesture. That's the world we lived in now. The world the Titans gave us.
I had come up with a plan to save us from the fields. At least a sort of plan. We couldn't keep on sleeping in the camp, the snows would be here soon and we would either freeze to death or starve. The only way I could see out of this was if I found an income and got my family into a board house, it didn't have to big, it just needed to have a real roof and walls to shelter them from the elements. I was eighteen and strong but I had grown up in Shiganshina, Grisha had seen to my education and as such I had no official documentation to use. Grandfather had taught us how to fight, inflict damage on another human, to mend our own wounds, to spot a knife in the dark but nothing so much as a trade that could bring in an honest income. It left me with only one viable option with the skills I possessed and that was to join the military.
Even in training the military forces provided a basic wage, I could give that wage to Uncle Arlert and he could care for everyone. It was better than them starving. I would have to become a soldier and there was a chance I would not see Aurora or the others for a long time but I would be fed and have purpose. It wasn't like I hadn't already planned to join the military before the Titans broke through. I had made up my mind to join when Eren did, this was just me joining ahead of him. I could forge a career and when I graduated, I would have a better income to support them all, by then the children would be just short of adulthood and be able to earn their own wage.
And if I know Eren he will be right behind me as soon as he is of age. I can protect him.
The only problem I had left was telling everyone. I had decided to tell Uncle Arlert as soon as we finished in the fields, he would tell the others and I would leave for the training camp tomorrow morning before they woke so no one could stop me. I just hoped this was the right choice.
I wiped my brow with the back of hand and spotted Eren holding out a water skin for me, I smiled and accepted the offering ruffling his hair. Aurora was a few rows across from us and spotted us before she began to make her way over to us, unravelling her knitted scarf as she walked. Coming up behind Eren she wrapped the garment around his neck and tucked it tightly into his oversized coat. He spun around and began to protest when she put a finger to his lips, hushing him.
"You need to keep warm, besides" she reached behind her head and pulled her long thick braid around and slung it over her neck and shoulder. "I have a scarf already"
I burst out laughing and Eren scoffed, shoving Aurora before going back to his section of the Field, Aurora followed him with her eyes a soft smile on her mud-covered face. Reaching forward I rubbed the mud off her cheek gently brushing over the healing scar just beneath her one Green eye.
"You need to keep it clean unless you want an ugly scar" I said and Aurora brushed away my hand, her grey and green eyes rolling.
"Not like anyone would notice, not when they are staring at my witch-eyes" she drawled, wiggling her thick eyebrows at me. A foul excuse of a man had called her witch-eyes a few days ago when she had caught him trying to take Armin's share of rations from him. She had kicked in his knee and when he had fallen, she had headbutted him knocking him unconscious.
Grandfather would have been impressed .
As amusing as it had been to watch she had just recovered from a head injury herself and had not taken well to being scolded by Uncle Arlet about her lack of regard for her own health.
"You shouldn't joke about that; people are suffering and will look for any excuse to blame their problems on something or someone else" I said pointedly and she scrunched her nose in disapproval which had taken on a pinkish colour with the cold.
"Let them, I'll headbutt them too" Aurora shrugged, taking the water skin from me and drinking deeply.
Charming.
"And you say Eren is a hot head" I muttered. She swallowed and wiped her mouth revealing the dirty bandages on her hand and my face twisted remembering how she got them as she eyed me strangely.
"Yeah well we all have our faults at least ours isn't lying" she stared me dead in the eye with one eyebrow arched. A flash of Eren's mother entered my mind, Carla always did that when she had caught us out and I swallowed painfully trying to squash down the memory.
"I have no idea what you're talking about" I feigned and began to push my hoe back into the dirt. She must have found my packed bag ready for my departure to the training camp and means to confront me.
Shit.
"Remember who your talking to brother," she pointed her finger at me accusingly "You've been acting shifty for the last few days and this morning I found a bag full of your things with a map and stowed away rations so you tell me what is going on" she demanded, crossing her arms in front of her chest and looking at me with furious eyes.
Does she think I'm abandoning them?
I sighed and dug the hoe back into the earth before turning to her and placing my hands on her shoulders, towering above her.
Had she always been this small?
"I was going to tell you" I started nervously, "I'm going to join the military and before you go off on one it isn't for what you think. I get a wage while training and I'm going to send it back to Uncle Arlet so all of you can have a proper place to stay before the snow starts to stick. This is the only option I can think of and I've made up my mind. So, don't make this any harder than it has to be okay?"
She stared at me long and hard. A mixture of emotions ran across her face and I recognised every one from Shock, disbelief, anger and finally acceptance before she pushed my hands from her shoulders and let out a deep sigh.
"Right then" she said and turned around on her heel stalking off across the barren field mud flying up behind her.
"Aurora!" I shouted walking after her but was drowned out by the horn signalling the end of the shift. She weaved into the throngs of people leaving for their homes, her vibrant hair visible as she ducked and weaved. I ran my hands through my hair in exasperation and made my way over to the buckets of dirty water and washed the soil from my hands before heading back to our makeshift shelters at the refugee camp. It was a half hour walk back and rain had begun to lightly fall with the sun setting putting a bitter chill in the air.
I shoved my hands into my pockets to keep them warm and putt one foot in front of the other, my mind in turmoil. I was sure of my course; I wasn't changing my mind but I wished there was a way in which I didn't have to leave them all behind. I didn't want to be alone but I had to do this; I had to pave the way.
Is this what you meant Grandfather when you said our family words.
We light the way. The sparhawke words of honour. Grandfather had been adamant on ingraining them into our very being. Hours upon hours of lectures on strength and readiness but never saying what we had to be ready for. The endless training sessions to make sure we were strong enough; I had always thought it had been out of shame. Shame that our parents had not been strong enough to protect themselves from thieves and cutthroats. Walls knows the old bastard never showed anything close to love or even affection, though there were moments when I thought I saw something similar to relief. Like when Aurora ripped that slavers throat out with a switch blade for daring to take Mikasa or when I caught a blade mid-air, which he had thrown at me in one of his many torturous training sessions. Then when he lay there dying, he had said things that made no sense.
Listen to me both of you. You need to protect each other. I won't be able to keep them away and they will come for you.
Who were they? Who had he kept away? Cryptic asshole, even in his dying breath he didn't give an answer or reason why.
Or his love.
Looking up I saw the entrance to the refugee camp and weaved through the sodden tents till I reached our badly joint canvases. We had done our best to make enough room for all six of us, loathe to be separated after everything we had gone through.
Ironic considering what I'm about to tell them.
I lifted the flap and was greeted by everyone sat down on the sleeping rolls in silence looking at me.
Fantastic. Walls save me from Aurora and her big mouth.
"P...please tell m...me this is a joke?" Armin stuttered his big blue eyes filled with unshed tears. Uncle Arlert placed a hand on his shoulder to calm him and a stab of guilt hit me as I tried my best not wilt under his betrayed expression. I sighed and glared at Aurora who just stared back with her face blank.
"No Armin it's not. We need the money; we won't all survive the winter unless we get proper shelter and we can't do that without coin" I tried to reason with him.
"You don't know that!" Eren jumped to his feet shouting. "We should go together! We can hold out just a little while longer and go together!"
"No, we can't" Aurora said gently as she stood and came to stand by my side,"Two years is too long to wait for you to be of age Eren"
I looked at her shocked, I had thought for sure she would have chewed me out the most over this. Out of the corner of my eye I caught Uncle Arlert shift uncomfortably looking at Aurora with sadness before turning his gaze back to me.
Aurora, what have you told him?
"We need that income now" Aurora continued and I was utterly confused; she should be arguing against this. She was being far too agreeable; something was amiss here.
"That's why tomorrow morning we will be leaving for the training corps" she declared and my head snapped around to hers, my eyes wide in shock and Aurora turned to look at me with a small smile on her face.
"What do you mean we?" I asked incredulous.
Of all the stubborn pains in my ass you have to be the worst one.
"Two incomes are better than one. This way they can have a roof over their heads and food come winter, besides" she added taking my hand in hers. "you're my brother. Where you go, I go".
I had to swallow to hold back the tears. I should try and talk her out of this, ask her to stay with the children but the only thing I could think of was that I wouldn't be going alone now.
Coward.
"I will follow when I'm old enough!" Eren declared and I smiled then, unable to stop the tears from streaking down my face.
"I expected nothing less" my voice broke and I grabbed a hold of him, pulling him tightly to my chest. Mikasa and Armin rushed over to us and wrapped their arms around us and I reached around pulling Aurora in too, I enjoyed the feeling of being whole because come tomorrow morning everything would change.
*******
Morning had come too soon. We had little sleep that night, instead opting to spend the night making promises and plans for the next time we would all see each other. I hoped it was sooner rather than later.
Aurora had spoken to the garrison guards and had managed to talk her way into securing us a ride to the training corps with the supply wagon we were currently sat upon and It had broken my heart to leave them. Eren, Armin, Mikasa and Uncle Arlert had come to see us off and had each hugged us tightly. Armin has promised to watch over Eren and Mikasa, Mikasa swore to defend our family and Eren had promised to join us soon as soldiers.
Uncle Arlert had placed a hand on both our shoulders and said "Don't go where the other can't follow. Promise me" it was an easy enough promise to make. He had hugged us then and wished us well. We had waved and waved until they were out of sight and then hunkered down for the three-day journey.
"It's not too late you know." I said softly "I know you never thought about joining the military like me and Eren, it's not too late to turn back"
Please don't turn back.
"Don't go where I can't follow remember? We made a promise, not just to uncle Arlert. Grandfather said we had to protect each other and that's what I'm going to do, are you with me?" she asked as her eyes held mine and I grasped Aurora's hands, holding them tightly.
"We came into this world together. Where you go, I go. I'm with you" I swore, saying her words from the previous day. She nodded and pulled me beside her so she could lay her head on my shoulder while she slept. I closed my eyes too, my thoughts going back to who we left behind, their faces flashing through my mind as I drifted off to sleep.
************
We stood in rows upon rows in silence waiting to be addressed, the cold winter breeze blowing down the lines of the 102nd training cadets. Aurora was to my left dressed in her uniform; her vibrant hair braided in a crown around her head with her fist curled into a salute above her heart, head tilted back in pride. It surprised me how much the look suited her.
The sound of footsteps stomping across the ground made me straighten my back and look forward.
"You have the misfortune of having me, Keith Shadies, as your commandant! I do not welcome you warmly! In your current state, you'd be nothing but food for the Titans! You're mere livestock! You're less than livestock! Over the next three years, we're going to train you worthless nothings and teach you how to fight Titans! Three years from now, when you come face-to-face with the Titans, will you still be fodder for them?! Will you serve as an honourable barrier that protects the king?! Or will you be a glorious soldier for humanity that drives the Titans out! It's up to you to decide!" The commandant yelled.
And so it begins.