Ava's POV:
The dead leaves crush underneath my shoes as I continued strolling around the festival. I can hear everyone's voices, feel their shoulders brushing against mine, and smell the delightful snacks. Yet, somehow, it feels like I was still alone.
I press my face into the palm of my hand. "What the fuck, Ava. You can't feel that way if you're the one who rejected him."
Feeling the buzzing in my back pocket, I slip my phone out to see Eli calling me. Inhaling a deep breath through my somewhat stuffy nose, I cleared my throat before pressing the phone on my ear. "What's up?"
"Hey there, pretty lady," his joyful voice whisp into the ear.
I shove a hand into the pocket of my jean sweater. "What is it, Eli?"
"I stopped by your booth earlier. Mr.Nocella said you were given the rest of the day off? Want to hang out with me?"
I can feel the small smile emerging, and I scratch my head, "Well-"
"Av! Av!" Mary's voice dash in the air tingled with excitement. "You should come with us! Eli is amazing when it comes to game booths! He won me an alligator and a hippo. We only spent three dollars!" They laughed.
I exhaled silently as their laughter slowly died down. Perhaps, this is for the best. Mary is a good girl, one who is perfect as someone's girlfriend. Unlike me, who's social reputation is at a low, hers has always been clean. Even her ex-boyfriend has nothing to complain about her.
"Where are you?" Eli asked.
I forced out a cheery tone, "I'm just walking around." Even with these conflicting emotions, I know it's only temporary. Eli is a good guy, and it has been a while since I've been treated this kindly; perhaps that's why I like being with him. "I think I want to be alone for a little while. I'll call you guys later okay?" I said before Eli can push any further.
"Oh." There was a brief silence between us as I waited for his response. "Alright, call us when you're ready."
"Okay," I said, before ending the call.
This is for the best, I continued telling myself. Once Eli sees, or perhaps he already saw it, how great Mary is, they will become a couple. Eli will move on from me, and I don't have to be concerned about whatever it is or isn't between us.
Tucking my phone inside my pocket, I began walking in circles, evaluating the booths. Often enough, I would pass by some schoolmates who ask me to join, but I declined.
"Av!" a familiar girl from Luke's group called out. Even though we are both deemed socially popular, Luke and I hang out in different crowds. I choose to be with my twin while I entangle himself with our old crew.
"Hey Zoe," I said, and she went into me for a hug. Zoey is one of the girls from the cheer team. We aren't close, but we do interact once in a while. Behind her, I saw Sarah, along with a few other girls and guys. Sarah looks away from my eyes, and I'm certain its guilt or even worse; she doesn't feel bad about what she had done.
"You're alone?"
I nodded, "Yeah," I said, giving the other girls a side hug.
"Want to hang with us?"
My eyes scanned the group once more, realizing that Luke wasn't present. I'm slightly interested in why he isn't present but not interested enough to ask. "I'm actually looking for my brother," I fibbed.
"Oh, I think I saw him going that way with a few others earlier." Zoey pointed in the other direction. Even though we aren't close due to a lack of similar commonality except cheerleading, I've always known that she is a nice girl. There is also the fact that we used to be close in elementary school.
I smiled, "Thanks," I said, seeing the group slowly trending from one booth to another.
"Av?" she said before I can walk away. "I know we haven't been close, but you can come to me if something is going on."
I chuckle lowly, "What do you mean something is going on?"
She shoves her hands in her pockets. "Come on, Av. Let's not do this. We have known each other since elementary school. I was there during your grand transformation in middle school, and I'm still here for your sudden change over summer. I'm not stupid, Av. Something happened."
I smile, "It seems like you're not the only one." I gesture my head towards the group behind her.
"We aren't perfect, Av, we know that much. I know some of the people in the group are jerks...entitled assholes, but it doesn't mean we all are like that."
"What's going on, Zoe?"
"There are some of us who miss you." She glances back, "Sarah been kind of a bitch since you, Winnie, and Mary left. She thinks she is the queen now."
"Then, let her be the queen. Zoe, I'm done with all this high school anarchy shitfest."
Zoe smiled, kicking her white shoes. "Don't say things like that, Av. You're making me feel bad."
"And should you feel bad?"
"Because I can't seem to be done with this high school anarchy shitfest." She laughs lowly, "Even Luke has been hanging out with us less."
"Luke hasn't been around?"
She shook her head, "No, he's been pretty off since the cafeteria incident."
"Zoe! We're leaving!"
"Coming," she shouted, waving her hand in the air, but it was still inside her hoodie. She turns back towards me, "Between you and me, I know you didn't do anything wrong, Av."
I smile, "That's appreciated." I wave her goodbye. Inhaling a deep breath, I turn my body towards the direction Zoey pinpoint to make it look like I was walking that way. When I was out of view, I immediately made a sharp turn into the woods.
I shove my hands into my pockets once more. With an unsteady beat, I pull out the small rectangular box. It seems that I unconsciously grab the pack of cigarettes in my drawer this morning. A smirking like feature crosses my features as I flip the box around my finger.
"Are you going to share?" I turn my head to see Luke scrabbling past the bushes.
"This stuff will only kill you," I said, shoving it back into my pocket.
"If its that toxic, why would you keep a pack with you?"
I lean against the tree as Luke settles himself on the ground. "I don't know," I shrugged, slightly sliding downward. There was space between us, enough to state that we weren't close but not too far where I couldn't hear him. "Force of habit. Comfort, maybe."
He grants me a half smirk, half-smiling sense. "Sucks for me. I really need one right now."
"You haven't quit smoking?"
Luke exhaled, "Once in a while, I do. Gives comfort, right?"
"Even if I give you one, it's not like you can lit it. I don't have a liter."
Luke poke into his pocket and pull out a silver lighter with a skull carved to the side. I remember that one, its the one I gave him for his birthday last year.
The music was so loud that it made my skin tingle, and my lungs feel like mush. The bass thumped in time with my heartbeat as though they were one, filling me from head to toe with music. I like this song.
Over the roar of music, a distant, hazy chatter could be heard. I couldn't make out any words, but laughter rang in my ears and wouldn't seem to stop. The song that was playing got louder, pulling me in and wouldn't let go. I had no choice but to join the crowd, jumping in the huddled group. My eyes drift around, "Where's Luke?" I asked Winnie.
She circles herself once while placing the alcohol can in the air attempting not to spill it. "I don't know," she slurred, slapping on Landon's hands, who was getting a bit too freaky.
I stumble and crumble through the crowd, rejecting those who attempt to mingle with me. Finally, tripping out of the crowd and crisscrossing upstairs, I found Luke in his bedroom. "There is the birthday boy!" I chirped, closing the door and de-escalating the music. "What are you doing up here all alone?" I crash onto the bed beside him.
Luke laughed, "Someone drank a bit too much tonight. Didn't she?"
I wave a hand in the air, "I'm buzzed. Not drunk."
He shook his head, "Av-" he places the can in my hand on the nightstand, "you need to chill."
"Chilly. Smilly. Now tell me, why are you up here all alone during your banging birthday party?"
He shrugged, "It was getting too much down there, you know? My eardrums are killing me."
There was a card in his hand. He lifts it, noticing my curiosity, "It's from my parents."
I frown at his statement. If his parents send a postcard, it must mean they aren't coming home for his birthday. I forced a smile. "Well, they'll be back for Christmas, right?"
He chuckles, a very brief one, "Yeah." Even I know that he doubted his response.
Luke has been living with his grandparents ever since his parents decided to move abroad to aid refugees. They want to make the world a better place; is what they claim.
Luke lay the card down, allowing the credit card to slip out. He grabs the pack of cigarettes and pulls one out between his fingers. He glances over at me, "Want one?"
I shook my head, "Not now."
He shrugged with a lazy attitude before pushing his hand into his pockets to find the lighter, "Shit. Where is it?"
Tugging into my pocket, I remember the lighter I purchase for Luke. "Here," I said, placing it in front of him.
Luke gazes at me, momentarily, "Makee."
"It's not a big deal. I dropped by the convenience store earlier and got it," I lied. I've been carrying around the lighter for weeks, anxious to give it to Luke for his birthday.
He smiles before grasping the lighter from my hand. Placing the cigarette between his lip, he closens the fire on the edge and allows the smoke to tampered with his lungs.
He exhaled.
Luke gazes over at me while my fingers wrap tightly around the rims of the dress. His eyes drop before it moves upward as he rests on the wall behind him in a lazy like motion. "Want to have sex?"
"Sure."