CHAPTER 21. NAÏVE AND DECIEVED...
CASPIAN.
"Serve-serve you? Are-have you gone mad? Is this all but a game to you?" I was hurt, I was being manipulated beyond belief and yet I stayed, and waited for the explanation, that somehow I must have misheard, that this wasn't a horrid scam, that they could help me, help Samantha...
"Caspian, I would've thought that you had some inclination that this wasn't fraud, have you ever been on such a plain? Have you ever seen such visions? Have you ever heard of us, in all you bandwidth of knowledge? I believe the answer you are looking for is... no, you have not." Uuke-Nay spoke with zero patience, but wasn't harsh in tone just eager for my belief.
Everything swimming through my mind, sweeping and swiping at me, causing lacerations on all I've ever known, as it tears through each and every one of my beliefs. It became to all be, just too much, and instead of coping, understanding, and the absolute assertion I had been created with, I began to lose touch with reality and in doing so collapsed to my knees. "Your telling me, that God-that God is not the only, that everything I've ever known is-is a lie?" I was short of breath, and my vessels heart pounded, though I'm sure if I had been in true form there would be nay of a difference.
"Yes, yes I'm afraid that is exactly was I tell you. I'm so very sorry Caspian, if I had thought you would be coping in such a way, I-we would have went about this differently..." Nay-u in her youthful form of choosing spoke with a compassion so rich so deep that even in my disarray, couldn't go unnoticed.
With tear stained eyes I looked up at the one who told me my life, my existence, was a lie. Crying like a child, like someone who has lost everything to be dear, I looked hopelessly to her. She walked to me and instantly held my sorry head in her hands and with the tickle of a butterfly laid a kiss upon my head, and even though I felt as I do, with all my sorrow I knew she was right, that this wasn't a lie.
"I-I trust you, I don't know how I do, but I know that I can. Alright if you truly can save her, and salvage our bond, I will serve you..." I said through an onslaught of tears.
"Oh Caspian it is so much more than mere serving... you will be family. Your where you belong..."
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SAMANTHA.
"Ahhh!" I moaned aloud contently as I awoke, nestled within Jace's arms. "Good morning gorgeous," Jace said, as he brushed some hair out of my face. "Hey you," said turning to face him completely and I leaned in for a kiss, and as soon as our lips touched I felt... black... bad, wrong. I was frightened and cold instantly, I felt repelled by him. Upon feeling this I opened my eyes and everything was as it was, nothing amiss nothing different. Jace noticing my reaction asked, "Are you alright? Are you in pain?" he was instantly concerned and even though those dark sudden thoughts came to pass, I was left speechless, and nervous.
Undecided on what I should do next I nodded, yes. I really needed a minute alone to calm down. Once he left to go get the pain meds, I lay in thought of how do go about my flash vision. Out of all the weird, and horrible things that have occurred over this time, was it best to ignore such a feeling? It was more than just a feeling it was deep sense, deep knowledge, but come on! This was Jace! I think everything was getting to me from these last weeks, and I was still terribly tired.
I went into the bathroom to go pee, and then decided once I was done to wash my face to help wake me up and clear my head. I went into my medicine cabinet to retrieve my grapefruit face scrub and when I closed it to have a look in its mirror, Jace was standing silently behind me staring at me. "Oh holy fitz! No offense but dude, CREEPY MUCH?" after my horror movie scream in terror I kind of scolded him and his hard core stare returned to normal and he replied, "I'm sorry I thought you heard me coming. Look if I offended you I can go," he said placing the pill bottle on the counter and turning to leave. "No! its ok, well its not but just don't ever do that again ok? Like stomp, shout, I don't care, just make your presence known. Like really you have no idea what I have been going through lately." I said in a nervous, exasperated sigh.
"Yeah ok. While where on the subject, you mind telling me what the hells been going on around here? I didn't ask you yesterday, because of the crisis and all and even before that with the prison ordeal, but I think its time you spill and tell me what is going on. You owe me that much..." the way he said it, was sort of harsh, but then I thought he was right. I did owe him. "First can I ask you how Tiffany is doing? You went down stairs was she up already?"
"Don't change the subject, answer my questions!" Ok whoa, my head cocked slightly to the side in reaction from him words, "Um, whoa, ok I wasn't changing the subject. I really want to know how the hell she's doing. She almost died yesterday, and you were just where she was getting my drink, so please go ahead and tell me..." Jace's face shifted from the hard look it just held to deliver the last words he spoke and replaced it with a softened look before replying, "Oh. Oh hey, look I'm sorry. I-I didn't mean it that way," he walked and stood right in front of me staring down into my eyes and his eyes seemed different somehow. I cant explain what it was, and my eyes looked left and right in tune with his, searching, but finding nothing.
"She's fine, still sleeping, if you don't believe me you can check," he said quickly, and I hadn't a reason to disagree or not believe him. "Good, ok thanks-" I said exhaling in relief, "I'm sorry. I'm just a bit cranky sometimes when I wake up, that's all. Forgive me?" I said standing on my tippy toes and pouting my lips just slightly and he leaned down and kissed my lips following, "Of course."
"Um, I would be more than happy to tell you everything, about what's been going on in here but, can I please take a shower? I really need the heat and pressure to help me relieve some stress or I'm useless." I asked, "Yeah sure, but promise me first," he held on to my arms with both his hands holding me in place, and kept me in his hard, penetrating gaze, "I promise." I said as if his will had made me speak it, but I would have anyways, I think? He smiled and kissed me on the forehead, and when doing so I heard just barely a little moan escape from his mouth. But it wasn't a moan of pleasure, or any moan I've ever heard before, it was almost as if he was wheezing, like pressure was applied to his chest, and it wasnt the first time I've heard it from his lips. If fact, since we woke up, every time he has kissed me I've heard it, but hadn't truly noticed until now. Huh...
He had turned to go and was nearly out the door, when I asked, "Hey if its not to much trouble, can you maybe make a pot of coffee?" he turned towards me, "Sure," and left. I wasted no time, in undressing and running the hot water, while I did so. "AHH" I announced as the hot water cascaded down my body steaming and soothing as it did. I lifted my face to the showerhead and let it burn for just a minute, before placing my head down and letting it run down my neck and back. With my hands braced on the wall and bent over slightly to let the water hit my neck and shoulders just right, I began to tingle, but thought nothing of it until it intensified.
Immediately I was brought back into the deep trance like time warp, as I once was in before. I hadn't moved per say, but my body tingled and vibrated profusely, while everything in time it seemed just stopped. The steam thickened, and the water slowed, until it froze in mid air. It hadn't turned to ice, but stayed completely still in time, and I tingled and vibrated and heard my name, "Samantha..." and the scent of roses wafted instantly in the air, like a rose garden after rainfall. "Samantha... open your mind to me..."
'I want to but I don't know who you are,' Just as the thought came, it left and in its wake, I saw the beautiful, tortured man again. My mind was completely open to him now. He reached out for me, and like the last time, I reached back for him. While reaching, I felt like I was rising up and away but I hadn't moved, and at last we touched. It was enigmatic, magnificent, hypnotic, beyond belief the way he felt. I was sucked through God knows what, I felt as if I was on a free fall, I wanted to scream maybe I did, I couldn't say for sure. Never had I felt all I was feeling now before in my life, all my feelings felt pitiful in comparison.
Once I reached the end I was imploded with intense light, feeling like I'd go blind I slammed my eyes shut, and soon, so soon that time couldn't measure it went from blinding to the dim 60 watts of a house table lamp. I was dizzy, and felt as if I had fallen off a building but with out the pain, I mostly felt as if I were still falling. My ears popped, and I nearly vomited and when I opened my eyes finally, and he was on the floor before me, in a pile of blood, and feathers. Gold feathers.
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CASPIAN.
I couldn't speak anymore I was in such turmoil, and I knew I didn't have to so I thought, 'Is everything I've ever known to be, truly all a lie?' Nay-u's small hands moved to my shoulders and I heard her deep intake of breath expecting her to answer my question, 'No. Not everything is a lie, just...incomplete we'll say,' I jumped away from her touch as her words were not aloud but inside my head and out of all this madness, I hadn't expected that, but then, why not? That was possibly the last thing that should've startled me.
"Yes now that your with us, we'll say- you no longer have to communicate through words, you can talk in thoughts. But it only works-us hearing you-if it pertains to us, as well as you can hear us, anything else, no. Your still you, your private thoughts anyway," she said aloud, then added, "If you'd like me only to talk aloud I will do so, cant guarantee the others shall do that, but I will try to remember. If, you'd like?" I thought about it quickly then replied in thought, 'It doesn't matter, though it will take some getting used too,'
'Do I want to know, about everything? About him...your God?' I asked. 'She is nay but mine, She is ours. And yes, but when you are ready.' That I wasn't expecting... a-a woman. 'In this existence, if I have learned anything it is that nothing is expected, everything is a discovery.' 'Yes, I'm beginning to see that now, you know that is quite beautiful Nay-u,' admiring her words she concluded, 'Existing is beauty,'
.......
"What tis' next? What will you ask of me?" I asked aloud, I need to know this if anything, 'There is yes, we need something but only an Angel of Indyzo can retrieve it,' hearing this unfamiliar name is ask, 'Who is this 'Indyzo' you speak of?' 'Why your father, your creator, the God whom you no longer serve. How odd you hadn't known his name,' with a heavy and sharp intake of air, eyes a bulge, and even though I felt it to be true, I asked again, "M-my father? Lord above, in H-Heaven?" she nodded her head a few times and taken aback, I slumped further towards the floor, 'I had only known him as father, do you know why that is?' I confessed. 'I do not I'm afraid, winged one. We all, creatures of power in existence-because even those incapable of standing beside us such as humans, hold great power- we all, have our reasons.'
I nodded, a deep sense of peace filled me, and for once I hadn't that many questions. It made sense as nothing now a days seemed to, and since long ago when my first question rose, about Samantha's wellbeing, and her path, I seemed to have them and they continued to escalate, sinking me deeper in doubt. I felt weights lifting, and I wanted to be in action. I felt as if I were finally on the right path, that I belonged. I never knew before that I hadn't belonged, I never knew such feelings existed.
''We need you to retrieve something in the forest of cloud, something invaluable beyond belief, and I'm afraid only you can get it, there is more yes, I must insist this is of the utmost importance. I cannot explain however, why that is. So I ask you now, for your complete trust in this. What say you? Caspian an Angel of Heaven no more? Do we have your unyielding trust...?'
'Caspian an Angel of Heaven no more-' then what am I an Angel of? If no longer that?.....
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SAMANTHA.
"Please come to me, do not pull away," the beautifully bloody man said. I was terrified, but I knew I was in no danger. I was forced to look only into his pained eyes, century's of pain existed there, on levels I'd never be able to comprehend, or understand. I got the feeling of being beneath it, beneath him, but it wasn't in malice, or fault it was simply the way it was. I took in a deep steadying breath, and stepped forward. His eyes were remarkable, he had the most luscious lips and pure face I had ever laid eyes upon, he was made from beauty he was the reason the word existed I was sure.
I felt a breeze and the hypnotic spell within his eyes faltered infinitesimally, and I looked down noticing my body. My naked body, I expected to feel shame and my eyes crinkled in a scared manor, but when I looked down into his eyes, he was unaffected as if it simply did not matter. Still holding my small hand within his strong, yet gentile grasp, he spoke melodiously even the pain couldn't taint its harmony, "Please come, sit..."
So forward I went and knelt before him, I suddenly felt his great power. I soon felt the need of worship, of how I should offer him something invaluable to me. And in his evident grimace a smirk shown through, "That isn't necessary, your beauty is infinite, I am not without its effect. We have the utmost dire of situation to discuss, you are in grave, grave danger. I find myself melancholy at your presence, after all this time I am finally in it." I felt my face blush at his confession and I was about to ask what that meant. It was crazy the feelings coursing through me, I felt so grown up, so mature, like a woman in his presence, but completely childish and unworthy at the same time. I had never felt this way by any means from any man before, not EVER.
I hadn't need to ask the question after all, because he answered almost immediately, "I was on a mission, to end your existence. But I was nay the only one in that kamikaze arsenal," my terror filled intake of breath said it all, no need for words. But he continued, "Please, don't be frightened. I will not harm you, you have my word. For my impetuous sins I have paid and pained dearly and in penance for these comings I have called to you with the little power I have left..."
I hadn't any words anywhere within my body, and as I was knelt before him he adjusted and squirmed closer towards me making the blood that has pooled beneath him make sounds of spilt old syrup on the floor, snapping and crackling, making me cringe in disgust. That reaction came and went and he was face to face with me, his beauty was absolutely captivating, hypnotically holding me for ransom. Tears of blood spilt from his eyes as he reached out and laid a hand on my face caressing it lovingly, before saying, "I am so dearly sorry, so, so very sorry...."
His words took on corporeal form and in silvery shimmering matter, they flitted to my heart sending the signal to my brain for forgiveness instantly. And my own tears burned and pricked at my eyes, pooling over in forgiveness and sympathy. "I do, I forgive you." in such strong emotion, I reached out a hand and mimicked his motion. I caressed his face lovingly with a shaking delicate hand as it brushed up against his golden hair, shivers shook my body and he whispered, "Listen carefully... there are those who are not as they seem, be aware, look closely, deeply... He will not stop until your last breath has been extinguished.
...where the warmth of the sun and the sweet serenity of the moon gaze upon each other, he shall be born..." with this last words like the saddest song ever sung, he laid a sobbing, crushing kiss upon my lips and soon so soon, I was being ripped backwards feeling all I had felt upon coming here, but now, in reverse. And like I was flying through the air my ears popped harshly, shoving me back into the hot steaming shower I was just before inside of.
BY THE WAY GUYS OVER ON THE RIGHT IS PISTURE OF JACE>>>>> GOSH HES SO HOT!!! <3<3<3<3<3