It's been a month since I made up with Liam and Niall. Now me Zayn, Niall, and Liam have been hanging out like before. The only difference was Harry. There was no Harry. The boys always invited him, but he knew I would be there so he always declined. He always declined politely though like the way he is.
It actually kind of hurt he was avoiding me, yet I was relieved. We haven't been in contact for about 3 months. The last time I saw him was a month ago when I found him asleep at the park. There have been so many times that I was about to call him or text him, but I always decided against it. I just got nervous and started breathing heavily knowing I couldn't do it.
Maybe he'd just ignore me, or reply and say something that would shatter me. I just knew I couldn't do it, so I never did. As much as I wanted to, there was a part of me that didn't. Everything between us was so complicated. This is why we could never work out. Our relationship would just be too complex. I know I should stop obsessing over him after finding out about the pay thing, but I just couldn't. I'm a dumbass aren't I?
I was on my bed scrolling through my twitter when I saw Niall's latest tweet.
"@NiallOfficial: Very excited for what's about to happen! ;)"
Well what was that about?
I began scrolling again when I got a call from Liam.
"What do ya want loser?" I answered.
"Wow nice to talk to you too Louis," he laughed.
"Yeah yeah get to the point."
"Come outside me and the 2 other losers are waiting and we're cold as hell," he said.
"Well just for saying you're cold, I'll get ready slower."
"Just get down here stupid and wear nice clothes k bye," Liam hung up.
Why am I friends with such weird ass people. I sighed and put on a sweater. The sleeves went past my hands, which I liked very much. I put on a beanie and pulled it over my ears. I huffed and went outside to see the 3 boys standing against Zayn's car.
"What do you want?" I asked.
"Get in the car and don't ask questions!" Niall sing songed.
"Why?" I asked.
"The boy said no questions! Now get in the car!" Zayn pointed.
I climbed into the car after letting out and exaggerated sigh.
"If you guys are kidnapping me just to kill me, tell me. I'll call the cops before it's too late," I joked.
"He knows," Liam whispered.
"Oh shut up!" I slapped him on the back of the head.
"Well damn, somebody's a little grumpy."
"Whatever," I rolled my eyes then smiled.
"We're almost there! Blindfold him!" Niall screamed.
"Wait. What? What are you guys do-" I started saying.
Liam blindfolded me.
"Calm down! It's not anything bad, it's a surprise Jesus," Zayn tried calming me down.
"I don't believe you," I said hesitantly.
"Please, we're your best friends. If we wanted to murder you then throw your body into the river, we would've a long time ago."
"Good point," I agreed.
I felt the car stop. They carefully pulled me out and led me out into the cold night. The wind bit at my skin creating goosebumbs to pop up.
"Guys what is fucking going on!" I yelled frustrated.
"We told you it's a surprise Louis jeeze."
"I swear to god, if you don't tell me what's happening I will knee you all in the balls," I threatened.
"No need for that. You're already here!" Niall said happily. "Alright Liam and Zayn, you can go now."
I heard Liam and Zayn laugh then run away.
"Niall what the hell is going on!! I yelled again.
"Calm down, I'm gonna take the blindfold off right now," he huffed.
Niall took the blindfold off. I blinked a few times so my eyes could adjust to the light.
There were twinkling lights on the trees. I recognized the place. It was the park. But why did the boys bring me here?
"Turn around," Niall clapped me on the back.
I turned around and saw soccerballs all over the ground. The thing was though, they weren't messy. They weren't disorganized. It was a completely different thing. The soccer balls were aligned together to make a sentence. One simple sentence that made me confused, and terrified. The soccer balls spelled out
WILL YOU MARRY ME?
I turned back around to see Niall running away, then hopping up in the air, then running away again. What the hell?
"So what do you say Lou?"
I turned around again to see Harry dressed in a tux coming out behind a tree. I stood there holding my breath.
He walked until he was right in front of me towering over me. He went on one knee and took out a black velevet box, and opened it. Inside was a silver ring.
"Will you marry me," Harry looked up at me and smiled at me hopeful.
I stood there. Just stood there. Looking down at him. I was silent, expressionless, stone still. After a while, his smile fell. He stood up
"Say something please," he took my hand.
I said nothing.
"Respond. Say yes. Anything," he begged.
Again, I said nothing.
He cupped my cheek and rested his forehead against mine.
"Please Louis," he breathed. His breath smelled like mint.
When I didn't say anything, he leaned in and kissed me. I didn't kiss back. He realized this, and kissed me harder. Again, I didn't kiss back. He just kissed me even harder. I still didn't kiss back. He pulled away.
"Come on. Say something Lou," he whispered.
And that was what broke me out of my trance.
I pushed him away. I turned around, and started walking.
"Where are you going?" Harry shouted.
"Away from here!" I yelled.
"Why? Why are you running away from this? Why can't you just answer me?" He yelled back.
"Because I don't want to!" I said angrily.
"I know you want to! You just won't! You know why Louis? Because you're a fucking coward! You won't admit that you still love me!" He screamed.
I turned around and started stomping back to him.
"I'm the coward? I'm the coward? You're calling me the fucking coward?!" I shouted in his face.
"Yeah."
"You're the one who betrayed me! You're the one who didn't contact me for 3 goddamn months! You're the one who fucking avoided me! Then you just fucking pop out of nowhere and fucking propose to me? What the hell do you expect me to do? Kiss your feet and say 'yes I'll marry you!' well guess again because that's not gonna fucking happen!" I ranted.
"Not everything is my fucking fault! You didn't contact me either! So don't blame that on me! I worked hard to make this proposal special then you just try to walk away from me!" He cried out.
"You know what I think about this?" I yelled. I ran towards the soccer balls and kicked them. I kicked them all away. "That's what I think about it!"
"I know you still love me," he said quietly.
"Fuck you," I spat. I began walking away again.
"Why are you doing this? Why are you just walking away huh?"
"Because I can't do this. I just can't!"
"I love you! So much! You can't just walk away!"
"Watch me!"
"Do you still even love me?" Harry asked his voice broken. His once shining green eyes turning into hurt.
"I don't know," I said without turning around.
"But I love you! This is when you say you love me more! Please say it!"
"That was in the past! This is now! Get over it! Get over me! I'm nothing special! You'll stop loving me and realize that! So just keep the ring for someone else!" I screamed until I was out of breath then began walking again.
"Where are you even going?"
"Somewhere! Just don't follow me!" I called out.
I started running, but I still heard him crying in his broken voice.
"But I still love you."
*****
So what emotions are you going through at the moment? Sorry I'm updating a bit later than usual I was busy today with homework and writing my speech for this election at school. I'm running for freshman vice president! Hopefully I win! Love you all :)