writings & blurbs | 5sos

sorry - calum

you creeped down the stairs, seeing calum on the couch with his laptop in his lap. quietly, you made your way down and sitting next to the boy. your hand came up to touch his inked tan skin as you said his name softly. "hm?" he asked, his eyes still staring at his laptop still. "do you wanna make dinner together, tonight? we havent done that in a while." you asked, giving him a small smile. "i need to get emails and stuff right now." calum sighed, looking at you before kissing your forehead. "sorry baby." you just nodded, looking away and chipping away your nail polish. you heard calums fingers type away at whatever he was doing, sighing softly. calum hummed softly as you put your head up again, laying it against his arm. you stayed like this for a bit before calum shoved you lightly away a bit, feeling your heart break just a little bit. sadness and anger bubbled in your chest at the fact that calum didnt want to spend his precious last days with you before leaving for tour—instead he rather answer emails, and that bugged you. this was the first big test in your relationship since you met the boy when he was on his break. now that he's had a break, written music and now was ready to go on a world tour, you felt the boy you had fallen in love with drift away. folding your arms across your chest, you got up to leave the room for outside, taking duke out with you. it was a gloomy day in california, the air a bit chilly from the winter and a soft breeze that blew through your hair. you sat down on one of the chairs, staring at the pool in front of you, telling yourself to try your best not to cry. as you concentrated on not letting your tears spill out, a wet nose brushed against your skin, notifying you duke was next to you. your eyes wandered to the dog as he tried to climb on your lap. helping him, you hugged the fluffy dog, barring your face in his fur as duke licked your skin, sensing your sadness. feeling your thoughts begin to consume you, instead of sulking, you got up and went back inside to start dinner by yourself. with music softly playing and focusing on the directions of a new recipe you wanted to try, you distracted your heart from not breaking. after finishing dinner and you called calum to the kitchen to eat was when you lost it. the tan boy walked, grabbing his plate and taking him back to living room. "w-what are you doing?" you asked, feeling your voice fade quickly. "living room." he answered. "god fucking dammit calum, so you're just gonna eventually just act like i dont exist when you leave?" you snapped, slamming your hands on the counter. your boyfriend spun around, looking almost offended at your bitter words. "im just going to eat in the fuckin' living room, y/n. whats your problem?" he rolled his eyes before walking back to the living room. tears were now slipping down your cheeks and your heart hurt like never before. shoving your plate, you went upstairs, slamming the door before falling onto the bed and sobbing. you were so confused as to why calum was acting this way. all you wanted was to spend simple time with him before he was gone. although you were so mad at calum, you hugged his pillow to your face because you loved him him that much. what felt like forever, was maybe an hour, of crying—leading you to fall asleep with holding his pillow. when calum walked in, he saw your tear stained cheeks, making him realize he probably fucked up. the truth was, calum didnt want to leave, he just pushed you away because he thought thats what would help you when he leaves. with a frown on his lips, the tan boy sat on the bed, running his hand through your hair. "im so sorry princess," calum's voice broke as he spoke, guilt filling in his chest, the more he stared to realize how his actions hurt you. he laid next to you in bed, holding you close in his arms as he fluttered his eyes closed now. when you woke up, your face was in the crook of his neck as he protectively had an arm draped over you. as you woke up, you remembered what happened last night, sadness settling in your heart. "baby?" he asked softly. you pulled, meeting calum's eyes. you didnt say anything back, instead, you looked away from him. "y/n, im so sorry," calum murmured, you just swallowed, a lump growing in your throat but you tried to swallow it. "i was being such fuckin' dick to you when i should be spending time with you." his hand came up to your cheek, thumb running over your skin as a tear slipped from your eyes. taking a shaky breath, your eyes met his. the look calum had in his eyes made you loose it, soft bubbly sobs leaving your throat and your body shake. he held you tightly in his arms, his face hiding in your hair as he continued to murmur how sorry he felt. you couldnt help but cry, you wanted to say 'its okay.' because you could tell how bad he felt but at the same time, you felt you needed to let out all the feelings you've been bottling up inside you in the recent weeks. once you felt you could no longer cry, you looked at the tan boy with your red swollen eyes before kissing him on the lips. he pressed soft kisses to your face before hugging you. "the rest of the time being will just be for us, okay? no more emails or bullshit like that. we can do whatever you want baby." calum gave you a small smile before kissing your nose. "i love you, baby girl." he said quietly, making your heart flutter. "i love you too calum, i love you so much." you finally said, pecking his lips before the two if you held each other the rest of the morning.