31 - love equals care
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Dohyeong's POV
Unsurprisingly enough, I woke up the next morning burning up. My throat was slick with pain while my skin was the same with sweat. It was even a struggle to open my eyes that this point, but I figured it was just something that would pass.
I got so easily affected by alcohol, anyway. It probably wasn't something to make a rise out of. So, I tried my best to sit up, my actions sluggish and my fingers tingling with apprehension.
Half-hazardly, I let out an irritated sigh and reached for the object that seemed to be suffocating my finger with the intent to take it off. But as my fingers wrapped around the warm metal, I stopped myself.
I slowly unfurled my hand and stared at the ring, memories starting to come back to me at light speed. How he had said that he wanted to be around with no limits, and wished that we could be together with no shackles, like normal people. How he had given me this ring, and we had promised that everything would work out, no matter what.
It was a sentimental exchange then, and remembering it now just made it seem more important. I appreciated his smile, his calm nature last night even when I was obviously a little out of it. Whether irritated or intoxicated, he handled it with startling ease.
I couldn't restrain a small smile as I dropped my hands down to rest on the sheets below me again. He was odd, that was for sure. But I knew that by now.
As I finally stood up, a wave of dizziness crashed over me, making me immediately fall back onto the bed. Holding my hand over my forehead, I almost winced at the sticky mess I found accumulating at my hairline.
I almost called out for help, but then I realised that Taeyong was nowhere to be seen. Fear bloomed in my chest for a moment, until I noticed his suit jacket sitting by the end of the bed, neatly folded.
I let out a relieved sigh. It had only been a couple of days since he had come back, and I don't know if I could handle it if he had to leave again.
I couldn't place my finger on where he was for a moment, trying to wrap my head around why he would leave his jacket here until I noticed the water was running in the bathroom.
is he..?
But before I could finish my thought, the bathroom door opened and I was faced with Taeyong again. He more or less looked no different than usual, his hair still the same red colour and his clothes still clean and crisp. The only difference was his slightly rolled up sleeves and moisture-stricken skin.
"Dohyeong," I looked up to meet his voice. "Are you feeling okay? You look like you were dragged to hell and back,"
"Gee," I couldn't help a smile as I brushed the sweaty hair out of my eyes with the heel of my palm. "Thanks, Taeyong,"
He laughed, walking up and sitting next to me on the bed. "You know what I mean. You started a really bad fever last night, and you were breathing so hard that it was a little concerning,"
He let out a small nervous chuckle at that and my eyes softened.
"I guess you're even worse with alcohol than I am," He said this more to himself, nodding as he turned to me and put the back of his hand to my forehead.
"Maybe, but I feel pretty okay now," I insisted, looking away so his hand dropped. He just gave me a defiant look and told me to prove it.
"How would I prove it? I'm fine!"
a lie.
I felt quite the opposite from fine, actually. I definitely at least had a fever; not to mention that I was about drowning in my own sweat while still managing to shiver, and I was so dizzy I felt like I might about fall over if I tried to stand on my own. But it wasn't like I would let that stop me from anything; finals were too close to get sick so suddenly.
He raised a brow. "Okay. I'll believe you when you stand up, then,"
Stubbornly, I began to do so, until I realised why he was probably doing this. He must have seen me trying to stand earlier, and my cheeks heated up involuntarily as I remembered the struggle. So, begrudgingly, I just sat back down again, avoiding his knowing expression.
"I know you aren't well; it's practically radiating off of you. So quit trying to put up a facade," He told me, making me sigh.
"I'm not putting up a facade, "I mumbled quietly, finally admitting, "Okay. Fine. You're right, I don't actually feel that good,"
He nodded, saying that he knew.
"Dohyeong, I ran a bath for you, so go clean yourself up,"
My hand instinctively went towards my hairline that was still damp with sweat. Along with washing off, something like a bath might help me feel better as well.
As if sensing my intentions, Taeyong stood up and held out his forearm to me. I passed him a small grateful smile and accepted his help, trying to keep my numb limbs from tripping over each other. It was hard to, though, and he noticed, walking a little slower.
"Your body must be pretty decently out of it," He said this teasingly after I managed to stumble for the second time on the ten feet walk over to the bathroom, making my face heat up.
As we walked, I begrudgingly mumbled out, "I'm never drinking again."
He didn't say anything to that, just smiling. I figured that the sentence made him a little happy, even if he knew it was just a spur of the moment thing to say. But this just made me even more curious about his relation to things like drinking. Whatever it was, it was obviously big to him, and I was dying to figure out why.
"Call if you need anything, okay?"
As soon as he shut the door behind him, I took in the room he had somehow managed to make feel so much nicer. Though there wasn't much to look at, the little things that he had done made my heart beat fast in adoration.
The air was filled with the soft scent of the ocean, like the sort of smell that came with the ocean breeze in the summer. Sort of salty, but calm; ones that brought back inevitable memories. As I made my way over to the tub that was filled with blatantly blue water and thick cloudy bubbles, I determined that it was the origin of the scent.
Sitting on the edge and wincing at the momentary ache in my thighs, I ran my fingers through the water.
It almost sparkled under the light.
I pulled my lips into a line and turned my head back to the door that I knew he was sitting somewhere behind. I couldn't even express the emotions I felt for him at that moment. He was just so -
I didn't even know how to explain it and still do the feelings he gave me justice.
But, the kind of feelings I was growing into were reciprocated with nothing but that; care. So it didn't matter much either way. Having him around was enough for me anyway, I had decided. Besides, he was a guardian angel; he might psychically be above me, but there were rules that both of us still lived under no matter what either of us thought.
The only thing that told me otherwise was the little voice in the back of my head, screaming at me and trying to get myself to see what it thought was the reality. But, I knew that it wasn't true. He had said he wanted to be with me last night because he's my friend; it was a relationship that's given us both something we've never experienced, and I understood that.
And I hoped all of me would at some point, too. Because falling for a guardian angel would be nothing but trouble for both of us.
My limbs were still weak, my head still pounding, but my violent shivers were reduced to almost nothing as soon as I slipped into the bath. Warmth surrounded me, and I felt content, even as the sweat now feeling like it was soaking my hair now beginning to drip down the back of my neck.
I had expected the water to be hot, considering the circumstances, but I was pleasantly surprised when I found it to be a comfortable warm. My joints groaned as they loosened under the sudden change of temperature, and I found that my aching body had finally been given the right chance to relax.
It seemed like that maybe even in sleep, I hadn't been able to. But, Taeyong would know more about that than I would. He'd even said that I'd been struggling for a while, but I didn't remember anything like that ever happening.
I definitely wouldn't have still been drunk by that time, but it still left me a little nervous. Hopefully, I hadn't been too out of it. But, deep down, I knew that it really didn't matter what state he saw me in at this point.
I must have sat there for ages, somewhere in between being immersed in my thoughts and not finding the energy to move, but I was pushed out of it when I heard a knock on the door.
—
Taeyong's POV
I pulled back my cuffed sleeve and peeked at my watch, the hands ticking slowly. It had been almost half an hour since Dohyeong had gone in there, and I hadn't heard anything from her since.
I let out a sigh and dropped my arm back down to my side as my eyes wandered to the door. It wouldn't be out of the question to assume that she'd fallen asleep, seeing how she had been in the middle of the night.
"Taeyong,"
I looked up lazily, blinking at the sudden calling of my name. Dohyeong had been still up until then, but she had suddenly begun to toss and turn, the movements too languid for her to have been awake.
So, intrigued, I got up, going over to her bedside.
Her head was turned to the side, exposing her neck and the sweat that was coating it. But, she still managed to shiver, almost uncontrollably. Her skin was already slightly flushed, and her heavy breaths only seemed to make it worse.
My brows knitted with confusion as I reached out and placed the back of my hand on her forehead. She flinched as I did, and stopped breathing so heavily for a moment.
"Taeyong?"
Her voice was quiet and breathy as her eyes began to open, her head turning to me. I gave her a small smile and a nod as I took my hand away.
"How are you feeling?"
She didn't respond, the room filled with nothing but the sound of her breaths as she just shook her head. That was answer enough for me.
Assuming she had a fever, I willed my hand to be warm and held it to her cheek. Thankfully, she took it gladly, even bringing her hands up to lay them over mine. She looked slightly more at peace that way, and I couldn't help but smile.
It almost looked like she was leaning into my touch, even as her eyes began to close again.
I sat up straighter, unconsciously rubbing the back of my neck as I felt a small heat creep up onto my cheeks. Clearing my throat and finally making up my mind, I stood up and made my way across the room to the bathroom door.
Much to my surprise, she responded almost as soon as I knocked on the door, her voice rough.
"Are you okay in there? You've been in there for a long time,"
It took her a moment to respond this time, but I soon heard her croaky voice reply, "I'm alright,"
She didn't provide any detail after that, eliciting a sigh of disbelief from me.
"You don't sound alright," I replied, crossing my arms as I leaned against the door by my shoulder.
Another pause.
"Yeah, I know." She said this quietly, making me raise a brow as I turned my head slightly towards the door.
I pulled my lips into a line. I wanted to help her, even if it was just a little bit. "Do you need anything?"
"I.. no, I'm okay I think,"
Her voice was quiet, almost embarrassed. But, I didn't buy it.
"Dohyeong, are you okay with me coming in?" I question her one last time until she was sure. Because, the last thing I wanted for her was to feel embarrassed, especially now.
"...Yes."
When I opened the door, she was sitting there; still as could be, and staring off into space. It seemed like either she was true to her words, or she was too tired to care any longer.
"Dohyeong?"
She blinked and turned her head so she was looking at me, and I couldn't help a sigh. She didn't look any different from when she'd gone in here earlier; her hair still matted with sweat and her skin still a slightly flustered red.
"What exactly have you been doing in here?" I asked, pulling over the shower stool and sitting on it next to the tub. But she didn't make any move to answer, her eyes just trying their best to follow my movements.
"I don't know, I guess I just lost track of time?" She phrased it as more of a question than an actual answer as she finally looked away from me, her hands idly playing with the thick bubbles that were covering her body
"Yeah, let's hope that was all."
She playfully narrowed her eyes at me and smiled, inducing a bewildered laugh from me. She still managed to be that way, even in her condition.
"Is something wrong? Well, you know, other than the obvious?"
Her smile faltered for a second as her cheeks managed to grow to a deeper colour than they already were. I didn't want to give a reaction and trouble her, but seeing it was too amusing for me not to give her a teasing smile.
"Do you want me to help you wash your hair?" I asked, my eyes flickering up to it. She seemed exhausted, so this was the least I could do to help her.
Her brows furrowed slightly as she shook her head. But, she didn't do a good job in convincing me, her eyes clouded with sleep and her movements lazy.
"Just relax, it's not a problem for me."
And it truly wasn't. If anything, I enjoyed the way she smiled when I ran my fingers through her hair and the way she still tried to talk to me, even though she was already falling asleep just sitting there.
Her sleepy smiles reminded me of a rabbit's; her lips stretching out wide and her expression peaceful. It was adorable, and I couldn't help but think about it.
I hoped that I could see that smile for a long time.
--
Dohyeong's POV
"Just relax, it's not a problem for me."
He said this so confidently that I really had no choice but to believe him. So I settled down with my back against the side of the tub upon no further thought, making sure to bring the mass of bubbles that was covering everything with me.
His hands went over my head almost expertly, the pads of his fingers digging comfortably into my scalp as he kept up a constant conversation to keep me busy. And, it worked well. With him there, my senses began to come back to me bit by bit.
His words had me laughing and responding normally, and not long after, I didn't feel so bad anymore. It was like just his presence was magic to me, and everything was left better in his wake, no matter what he did.
But -- when laughing with him like this, I wish it was just a little easier to ignore the warnings in my head.
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AN: i love one (1) magician 😪😪
the arcana has taken up so much of my emotional capacity,, so that's the only excuse I have for not updating. asra owns my entire heart and probably a part of my soul atm
and!! it may not seem like it, but this book is sadly coming to close soon. I'm hoping to finish it before the one year anniversary (May 6!) and even though that is really close, I'm prepared to work hard from this point on.
there honestly may only be about three chapters left, not including the epilogue of course ;) and,, I know that probably seems impossible with how slow this book has been moving, but I have faith that it will work.