Getting the tree bundled takes forever thanks to the amount of people waiting in line, and Roberta can feel her patience slipping. Camila goes off to get hot chocolate from one of the little stands that are scattered by the entrance of the Christmas tree farm, and that leaved Roberta alone in line for a few minutes.
She occupies herself with her phone and glances periodically to see if the line has moved up. She's nearing the front when she glances over her shoulder, her eyes inadvertently seeking Camila out. Roberta has been doing that a lot lately, always looking over her shoulder to see if Camila is okay. Usually she doesn't even realize she's doing it until after the fact.
She spots Camila standing near one of the stands that sells hot chocolate, and she does a double take at the girl she recently dated.
"Are you alright?" The question leaves Roberta's lips the second Camila sidles up beside her. She is sipping on her hot chocolate leisurely, as if nothing is out of the ordinary.
"Yeah, do you want some?" Camila offers. Roberta takes the offered cup and hesitates for a moment when she sees Camila's bright red lipstick stain on the rim.
"I don't have cooties" Camila teases lightly. Roberta rolls her eyes but lifts the cup to her lips, ignoring the fluttering in her stomach as she does so. It's probably the closest thing to a kiss she'll every get from the brunette.
When they get back to Camila's place and hour later, there is a large Christmas tree strapped to the top of Roberta's car. Roberta carries it into Camila's house while the brunette holds the front door open for her. Roberta and Camila start to bring in the rest of the day's purchases. Strands of lights, ornaments, candy canes, and anything else that could possibly go on a Christmas tree.
Camila puts music on while Roberta starts to set the tree up, and Roberta laughs when she hears the holiday themed music starts to play. It ends up turning into a huge decorating ordeal, with Camila and Roberta racing to see who could put more ornaments on in a span of two minutes.
Camila wins, and Roberta has to deal with a few minutes of taunting while she hangs her head in defeat. They work together to put the candy canes on, and Roberta listen as Camila sing along to the song playing on the radio. It's the first time she's heard Camila sing anything, and she's genuinely surprised at how good it is
Camila is spreading out the candy canes to make sure they're evenly distributed around the tree, and singing like an angel as she does so. As if Roberta needed another reason to love her.
"I don't know you could sing" Roberta says, peeking around her side of the tree to look at Camila.
"I can't" Camila shrugs as she reaches up and places a candy cane near the top of the tree, Roberta laughs, thinking that Camila is joking, but stops when she realizes that the brunette is very serious.
"Wait, you're serious? Do you hear yourself?"
"I mean, I'm not horrible but I wouldn't make it my day job. I'm more of a shower singer"
"You're beautiful" Roberta realizes her slip the second the words leave her mouth, and she quickly tries to fix it. "Like...your voice. Is beautiful. I mean you are too but I just...shit, never mind"
Camila is looking at her with raised eyebrows and a little grin, and Roberta awkwardly runs a hand through her tousled hair. She's gotten better at being less awkward around Camila but sometimes she still says some mortifying things, and she still falls flat on her face in front of the girl on a consistent basis.
"Thank you" Camila spares her by just leaving it at that, and Roberta takes a deep breath and goes back to decorating her side of the tree. A silence falls over them, with nothing but the sound of Christmas music filling it. Roberta is almost finished with her side of the tree when she hears Camila clears her throat subtly.
"I think you are too. Beautiful, I mean" She says quietly, her voice barely audible over the music.
"Really?"
"Extremely. It's a little intimidating sometimes" Camila admits "The first time I saw you two things came to mind. The first thing being that your eyes were freakishly piercing, and the second being that you were far too pretty to be wasting your time on me"
Roberta is genuinely surprised by the admittance. Camila has always been so guarded, from their very first encounter, so to get a little insight on what the brunette thinks of her is refreshing. It gives her a little hope.
"I'm intimidating? I've almost broken my neck a hundred times because of how unnerving you are!"
"I'm not unnerving! You're just clumsy!" Camila protests.
"I'm not clumsy, you're just too pretty, Camila!"
"I'll stop being pretty, then"
"Okay, let's not get ahead of ourselves"
"Nope, I'm going to start letting myself go" Camila says it through a bubbly laugh, and Roberta finds herself grinning like an idiot. She loves moments like these. Moments where Camila is happy and the banter between them flows seamlessly. It all just feels so easy.
"I would probably still think you're beautiful even if you did" Roberta admits, unable to keep it to herself.
She can see Camila's blush from her viewpoint but the brunette ends up ducking behind the tree to hide her grin. Roberta knows it's there, though, and that's all that matters.
----------
"Camila" Lauren snaps her from her thoughts.
Camila jubilantly stares at the huge tree in front of her, she closely draws a ragged breath, before she turned to look at the older Latina, staring in mild confusion.
"Are you okay?"
She feels a gaping conscience when all she had up front was the thought of 'her', Lauren was rudimentary present with her, yet all she could think about was the thought of 'her'. Camila thinks it was very unfortunate of Lauren to might have stayed, she deserves anything than to put up with her induced emotions.
Lauren stopped what she was doing, shifting with a valid proximity between them, her eyes were thou roughly scanning Camila's blatant staring, Lauren quietly contemplates as their eyes shifts to the huge tree being placed at Camila's living room.
"I know that in no way that I could ever understand your pain and it pains me to not be of much help" Lauren says elusively, still looking somehow interested with the tree, Lauren swallowed the lump in her throat before she started unpacking the boxes that were piled among them.
"But I don't ever want you to feel like you have to go through this alone" Her head tilted as she plasters a weak smile at the young Latina who was caught off guard by Lauren's sudden sentiment towards her reoccurring thoughts.
"Tormenting yourself won't bring you comfort" Lauren states, with her back turned at the younger Latina. Lauren was cutting through the old tapes while Camila enclosed the distance between them, the older girl ignores the faint steps that the younger girl was assuming, her thoughts were deliberately encased.
"I don't want to put up the tree with you"
It was cold outside, the wind had picked up, freezing to death even. Yet there Lauren was, outside, adoptive to the abandonment that she felt when Camila asked her to leave, she wishes to stay, but it seems a very heptode way to please the brunette. She wishes to hate her, but it wasn't possible for Lauren to do so, she just wishes that she'd have the patience to wait for the girl as long as she intends to.
Taking a last glance at Camila's window pane, Lauren hopped into her vehicle, spiraling out of the weather's transparency of how exactly she was feeling.
----------
"Are you going to sleep?" Roberta asks lowly, not wanting to startle the girl.
"Just a little"
Roberta doesn't know how someone could fall asleep 'just a little', but she doesn't have the heart to rouse Camila. She wants her to stay, no matter how awkward it may be in the morning, so she just goes back to watching television, and lets the brunette doze off.
Midnight comes and goes, and Camila is still fast asleep on her shoulder. Roberta is struggling to keep her eyes open but she's had such a long day, and she decides that she'll just let Camila sleep on the couch tonight.
She manages to get up without waking the brunette up. Roberta goes to her bedroom to grab a spare pillow and blanket for Camila, and when she returns she's surprised to find brown orbs sleeplessly looking around for her.
"I was about to tuck you in" Roberta smiles sheepishly. Camila rubs at her eyes sluggishly, and it's obvious that she's in no condition to drive. Roberta wouldn't let her even if she tried. "I'll make the couch up for you and then you can go back to sleep"
Camila doesn't seem to have any objection as she gets off of the couch. Roberta makes the couch up quickly, and when she's finished she steps aside so Camila can lay down. Camila ends up grabbing for her hand, keeping her from turning away.
"Sleep with me" Camila's words are still heavy with sleep, but there is alertness in her eyes that wasn't there before.
"W-what?"
"Not like that" Camila rolls her eyes as she lays down "I just need to be held"
"Oh" Roberta clears her throat, mentally kicking herself for jumping to conclusions and being so awkward. "Yeah, okay. I can...I can do that. Scoot over"
Camila does so quickly, until her back is pressed up against the couch, and there's enough room for Roberta to lay down. Roberta rolls over so that they are face-to-face, despite it being a tight squeeze. Their knees bump, and they end up having to intertwine their legs just so they'll both fit comfortably.
Roberta's arms wrap around Camila's waist and she rests her chin on the crown of Camila's head.
"Is this okay?" She hopes Camila doesn't hear the fear in her voice.
"Yeah" A beat of silence follows Camila's affirmation, but then the brunette shifts in Roberta's arms "Roo?"
"Hm?"
"I'm going to fall in love with you" Camila whispers the words, almost too afraid to say it out loud because that makes it all that much realer "I hope you don't mind"
Camila leans in and presses a kiss to her cheek. It's dangerously close to the corner of Roberta's mouth, and Roberta swears that her heart stops beating. Camila falls asleep soon after that, with Roberta's arms wrapped around her loosely. Roberta lays there for what feels like hours, silently mulling over what just happened.
Roberta silently kisses Camila's forehead before saying a solemn 'goodnight'
"I don't mind" She whispered ever so lightly before she followed Camila to sleep.
----------
Roberta misses her too.