Chapter 18: Twin Conflict
Mom had been staying in Spruceworth for a few days now and honestly, it was making me very nervous. I really didn't want her finding out about my drinking problem because even though I started when I was living with her, I knew she would only turn it around on my dad and blame him.
And I really didn't want her to try to take me away from Dad when really, I was only going to get sober living here. If I lived with Mom, I wouldn't have the proper support, as sad as that sounded.
At least Mom wasn't constantly coming around to our house to try to talk to me about more music schools. She still tried, but only if we ran into each other out in the village. So I mainly stayed in my house.
Which was actually quite easy since Grant was still staying here so I didn't have to leave my house if I wanted to hang out with him.
As much as I really loved having Grant stay at my house, I still wanted to help fix what was going on with his family. It wasn't fair of him to not with his own family, and to see his younger brothers, because of something as petty as Hennessy liking me too.
Although, there might be more to this whole thing that Grant wasn't telling me. His mom and sister couldn't be that selfish, could they?
Maybe I should ask Grant before going to talk to his mom and Hennessy just to make sure I wasn't interfering with something a lot more personal than I thought.
While Grant and I were watching a movie, we were sitting together on the couch with me leaning into him and his arms wrapped around me. I wasn't really paying any attention to the TV. I was too busy trying to work up the nerve to ask Grant if there was more to his family's argument. I shouldn't be this nervous but I was because I was afraid it was a touchy subject for Grant and he would only get mad at me for asking him.
And I definitely didn't like it when Grant was mad at me.
"Ollie?" Grant suddenly asked. "Are you okay? You're not paying attention to the movie and it looks like something's bothering you."
I sighed. I should have known Grant would notice I wasn't paying attention sooner than later. He could read me like the back of the hand. It was both a good thing and a bad thing but honestly, I mainly considered it a good thing. When I wanted to talk about something but I was too afraid to bring it up, Grant would end up doing it for me.
"I was just wondering something," I said. "About your family."
"You can ask whatever it is," Grant said. "I won't mind."
I still hesitated before answering the question because even though he said he wouldn't mind, I wasn't sure how he would react to the exact question running through my mind.
"Is there... Is there more reasons why your mom kicked you out?" I asked. "Other than you dating me? Because it seems kind of... I don't know, foolish."
This time, it was Grant's turn to sigh. "I should have told you the whole thing."
"So there is more to it?" I asked.
"A bit, yeah," Grant said. "So I told you that my mom basically sees me as my dad, right?" I nodded. "Even though he wasn't, she thought he was a very selfish man and only thought about himself. So whenever I do something that hurts Hennessy, even if I don't mean to or want to hurt her, she just thinks I'm ending up more like my dad."
"What if it was the other way around?" I asked. "What if it was Hennessy dating me and that hurt you? Would your mom call Hennessy selfish?"
"Are you kidding?" Grant asked. "If anything, my mom would just tell me to get over it and that I should be happy for my sister. It wasn't always this bad. It started getting this way after she found out I was addicting to cocaine. That's when she developed the mindset that I'm definitely going to end up like my dad, even when I got clean. And I know you're worried about me but I'm fine. Maybe this is for the best."
"Not seeing your family, your younger brothers, is for the best?" I asked.
"Okay, not that part," Grant said. "I meant staying apart from my mom and Hennessy for a bit. Maybe then they could realize that, and not to brag, they actually need me in their lives."
I could hear the doubt in Grant's voice but I didn't question him about the topic anymore. Him telling me that he was fine was his way of signalling that he was done with the conversation.
My cell phone beeped with a text message so I reached for it so see what the message read. Of course, it was from my mom and was about me going to a music school. Big surprise. Oliver, I talked to a few music schools are there are actually a few that will accept you, after you audition of course, despite the criminal record since it really isn't anything too bad. Call me when you get this.
Call her? Yeah, right. She just wasn't getting the hint that I was perfectly fine here.
Now I was in a bad mood so I said to Grant, "I'm going to take a walk. Clear my head."
"Was that your mom that texted you?" Grant asked.
"Yep."
"Do you want me to come with you on the walk?"
"No, I'll be fine on my own."
"Ollie..."
I pulled away from Grant so I could turn to look at him. "All I'm going to do is go on a walk. Nothing more."
"Going on a walk is usually code for doing something you really shouldn't be doing."
"I'm being serious," I said. "It's just a walk. Look, I'll be... Twenty minutes, max. If I'm not home by then and I don't call or text to give you a reason why I'm running late, call Shaw. Does that make you feel assured?"
"I'd feel more assured if I came with you," Grant said.
"I know but if I want to stay sober, I need to be trusted to be on my own," I said. "I can't have someone with me at every second of every day."
"You're right," Grant said. "Sorry."
I gave him a smile. "Don't apologize. You're just trying to look out for me." I kissed his cheek before standing up.
I was about to head to the front door but Grant grabbed my arm. "Excuse me, don't leave me with that insulting excuse of a kiss," he said.
I rolled my eyes before leaning down and giving him, in his terms, a proper kiss. "Better?" I asked.
"Much," Grant said.
I couldn't help but smile as I walked to the front door and put on my shoes and sweater. I then stepped outside, closing the door behind me as I took a deep breath. I had to admit, I was craving a drink right now but I was going to fight through it as much as I could. I needed to stay sober.
Fresh air could do me some good which was why I wanted to go for a walk right now. Yeah, it might have been smart to get Grant to come with me since the craving was present but I didn't want to always depend on someone. I had to work on this myself at times.
While I was walking by the cafe, I caught sight of Hennessy who was sitting at one of the tables outside while she was reading a book. I debated if I should try to talk to her about Grant or not.
In the end, I walked over and sat down on the seat across from her. She looked at me before looking back at her book. "What do you want?" she asked.
"I want to talk to you," I said.
"You can talk all you want," Hennessy said. "But I can't say that I'll reply or even listen to you."
"So you're mad at both me and Grant?" I asked. "Duly noted."
Hennessy stayed silent for a bit before placing her bookmark inside the book and closing it. She then looked at me, not looking the slightest bit happy. "Look, if I were you, I'd get away from Grant as soon as you can. He doesn't care about anyone else but himself."
"Really? Because from what I've seen, it's quite the opposite," I said.
"You think he actually cares about you?" Hennessy asked. "He's my brother. I know him a lot more than you do and trust me when I tell you that he doesn't care about anyone at all. He's a selfish person and all his intentions are to benefit him only. No one else."
Okay, I now fully believed that their mom kicked Grant out without any further reasons. If this is what Hennessy was acting like, I couldn't imagine what their mom was acting like.
"And why are you standing up for him?" Hennessy continued. "You two hated each other."
"We didn't hate each other," I said. "He just annoyed me for the first couple days after we met. And he did tell me that he liked me since that day?"
"Since the first day you two met?" Hennessy asked. "When you so-called threaten to kill him?"
I hadn't really seen this petty and annoyed side of Hennessy before and honestly, he acting this was to Grant only made me want to annoy her a lot. I did consider her my friend but now... I wasn't sure.
"What can I say? I guessed it really turned him on," I said.
Hennessy stared at me a bit before placing her book into her backpack. "I don't want to have this conversation right now."
"I just want to know why you're so mad at Grant," I said.
"I think you know why," Hennessy said.
"That can't be the only reason," I said. "You're saying things like how he doesn't care about anyone and how he's selfish when he really isn't."
"Come on, you can't really believe that he isn't," Hennessy said. "You're his boyfriend. You should have seen the signs by now."
"What signs?" I asked. "Like him joining the orchestra because I was technically forced to join and I didn't want to do it alone? Or how he skipped school one time to look for me because I wasn't there after lunch?"
"Those are small things," Hennessy said, standing up from the chair.
Before she could walk away, I said the one thing I knew that would get her to listen. "Or how he carried around a drunk kit for me everywhere he went?"
Hennessy looked back at me, her eyes furrowed. "What?"
"The reason why Grant and I ended up getting so close was because he has been helping me with something I have been struggling with for a while now," I said.
Hennessy sat back down at the table. "Drinking?"
"Yeah," I said. "I'm an alcoholic and Grant... He has been incredible ever since he found out. He always had water and snacks and painkillers with him just in case I ended up drunk sometime. He would always make sure nobody else found out I was drunk. When we went to that party, he got me away from alcohol. He was able to convince me to go to a support group even though I hated the idea, and now I'm being sponsored by someone. And even though I told him not to, he found a way to get my dad to find out about my drinking. So if Grant was really a selfish person, why would he go through all that trouble?"
She was silent for a bit and for a moment, I thought she would take Grant's side.
She didn't.
Her cold exterior was brought back as she said, "I'll tell you why. He wants to prove that he is nothing like our dad but trust me. He is. And it won't be long before he completely self-destructs and turns to the habits our dad had. After all, he already has a boyfriend with those habits."
Hennessy got up and walked away, leaving me a bit shocked. She had always seemed like such a sweet girl but this...
What she said was just horrible.
And I could only feel the cravings coming more so I got up and headed straight to my house. I couldn't risk being out anymore.
Grant was still on the couch when I got home, and as soon as I closed the front door, I said, "Your sister is a horrible human being."
"Why? What happened?" Grant asked.
"I saw her at the cafeteria and I thought I could try to talk to her," I said. "Maybe if she changes her mind about you and this whole situation, she could convince her mom of the same."
"And let me guess. She didn't and called me selfish?" Grant asked.
"Yeah," I said. "So I decided to tell her how you've been helping me with my drinking and she said you're only doing it to prove you're nothing like your dad, but it won't be long before you start following his habits and you already have a boyfriend who is."
Grant scoffed. "Why is that not surprising?"
I walked over to the couch and flopped down beside him. "I have to tell you that what she said kind of hurt a bit. I thought she was my friend but she immediately diminished my drinking problem and acting like she didn't care. If she was a true friend, she would have set the problems she had with you aside. This is why I have a hard time making friends. They seem sweet and then they stab me in the back."
"At least you have me," Grant said. "And you know I'll never hurt you. I'm way too nice for that."
"Of course you are," I said, but he still made me smile regardless. While I didn't have too many people I could trust, I did have Grant and he definitely had to be the most trustworthy person out there.
If only I could say the same about everyone else in my life.
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ugh grant is so soft and i love him.
he hypes up ollie more than i do and ollie is my own son. we love a supportive boyfriend.
and i know i've been saying this in basically every author's note BUT THE CHAPTERS ARE STILL LONGER THAN I AIM FOR. normally i start running out of things to write by 1000 words but not for this book. there hasn't been a single chapter that ends around then and i've almost reached chapter 20.
we'll celebrate with a gif of my precious bean ollie: