It is now going on two in the morning and I am literally pulling my hair out. Rashad still isn't here! He sent two people in the last hour to check on me, and even had someone call the house asking if I needed anything. What I need? I need to know where the hell Rashad black ass is! I don't understand why he won't just pick up the damn phone or call me himself! This shit is starting to really piss me off.
Every person he sent gave me the same dry half-ass answers whenever I pressed about Rashad's whereabouts. Like who the fuck see's that someone is worried and just doesn't give a fuck? I am so angry at Rashad right now I could scream. I've been waiting on him for hours, I'm tired, and I have class in a few hours. I know I should just leave and wait for Rashad to call me but I don't want to. If I've been waiting all this time I mine is well stay. Plus he definitely has some explaining to do.
After watching a movie in the living room I walked into Rashad's bedroom and climbed into bed. Chapo and Pablo both followed close behind. They jumped on the bed as well before I quickly told them to get down. Although I would love for them to comfort me I know Rashad would have a fit if he found out I let them on the bed again. They seemed a bit sad that they couldn't cuddle with me but was satisfied with lying at the foot of the bed on the floor.
I sighed as I laid back on the headboard of the bed burying my nose into the sheets. Tears began to fill my eyes as I forced myself to keep it together. I'm sick of worrying about Rashad. How could he leave me here like this? Does he not know how terrifying this is! All I want is for him to come home. I contemplated on calling him again, yet what's the point if he isn't going to answer? If he had any care in the world for my sanity he would've checked on me. It's almost like he doesn't care how worried he has me and that thought alone has me so pissed. Why would he leave the city and fail to communicate with me? I know Rashad is a grown man and doesn't have to tell me anything but it would've been nice to be kept in the loop. I mean I am his woman and I do deserve to know.
I said another prayer for Rashad again before just giving up. He's not going to answer, he's clearly not going to call and waiting up for him isn't worth it. I'm exhausted and I need to get some sleep. I don't even have it in me to worry anymore. It's Rashad's life and I can't control how he intends to live it.
____________
I was suddenly awaken by a loud noise echoing from downstairs. I shot up in the bed immediately as Chapo and Pablo instantly ran towards the door. They were growling and clawing at the door as I climbed out of bed. I could hear the muffled sound of people talking in the living room. I glanced over at the clock and noticed that it was four in the morning. Who the hell is in the house?
I wiped the sleep from my eyes as I searched Rashad's closet for a weapon, however, I only found a metal bat. That was good enough for me! I grabbed my phone from the nightstand and dialed 911 as I instructed the boys to be quiet. I twisted the doorknob slowly creeping out into the hallway. I was relieved to see that no one was upstairs as I checked each room that I passed. I silently walked down the hall as the boys followed close behind. Once I reached the middle of the hallway I took a look over the balcony into the living room. There were four men standing in the center of the room talking. Yet none of them were Rashad.
I tip-toed down the stairs planning to get a better look at them until Chapo and Pablo took off down the stairs blowing my cover. Their growling immediately got the men's attention as they all turned towards the staircase where I was now standing. I felt at any moment if I uttered the words "attack" they would do just that.
I clutched the bat in my hand saying, "How did you get in this house?" No one answered me. They were all staring at the dogs whose growling soon turned into barking. "How did you get in this house?" I asked again to only be ignored once more.
At this point I was ready to let the boys loose on these idiots and take on how ever many I could. A part of me thought that they could be burglars but they clearly didn't go through the trouble of hiding their identity because none of them were wearing masks. They weren't wearing any gloves and nothing looked out of place. So what the hell are they doing here?
As I started to ask these men one more time how they got in the house before going bat shit, Rashad suddenly walked through the door on the phone. More men entered the room as I watched them shuffle in behind him. When Chapo and Pablo seen Rashad they took a seat at the foot of the staircase and stopped barking.
Rashad ended his call and turned to me with a smile. "Hey baby." He tried to kiss me but I quickly pulled away as he frowned. "What's up?"
"What's up? Rashad where have you been? I've been calling and texting you all day and you mean to tell me you can walk in here on the phone but you can't call me back? You had me worried sick!"
Now I realize at the moment I was causing a scene but honestly I don't care. Rashad wallaces in here without the slightest pep in his step to see me and honestly thinks that I would run into his arms like a damn fool. He didn't even have the decency to call me after I blew up his phone all day. I know I said I didn't have it in me to fight with Rashad but the more I thought about earlier the angrier I became.
"Baby that was business.."
"I don't care." I retorted not accepting his excuse.
Rashad turned to his men and asked for them to give us a minute. I assume he wasn't too happy about me tripping out on him in front of his company but again I don't care. Hell he deserves it!
They all trailed out the front door in silence as Rashad closed the door behind them. Once they were gone he turned to me with a look of disappointment. I folded my arms staring him down right back. He's not the only one that can have an attitude.
Suddenly Rashad chuckled as he sized me slowly. The smirk that pulled at the corner of his lips literally sent me over the edge. What the fuck is so amusing?
"What are you smiling for?"
"Your outfit is cute but don't wear this to school anymore."
"Are you serious right now Rashad?" I asked as he brushed past me towards the couch. He took a seat as I stood over him. "I've been worried about you all day and you have the nerve to be joking right now. Are you kidding me?"
Rashad sighed running his palms over his face. "Shawty why are you turning up on me right now?"
"It's four in the morning Rashad. Where have you been?" I could tell that he was exhausted but my anger continued to get the best of me.
"I told you. I had to take care of some business."
"But that was hours ago Rashad, so what am I missing?"
"Listen I was on my way home to you like I promised but I got a call that held me up. I wasn't expecting for it to take as long as it did but it happens."
"That doesn't explain why you couldn't return any of my calls. How do you accept other's calls but leave me hanging like some idiot?"
"If I did you would've only be a distraction."
"A distraction? Are you kidding me? I'm sorry that calling you multiple times to make sure that you weren't laying cold dead in a dumpster somewhere makes me a distraction. I'll make sure to take a note of that in the future."
Honestly my feelings were hurt. Here I am worried about the safety of my boyfriend and he deems my constant attempts of communication a distraction. Was I not suppose to call and just wait to hear something on the news the next morning? How could he even say that to me? Of course I am going to call. Would he not do the same for me?
"No it's not even like that April. I had business to take care of ma. Sometimes my work can keep me away from home for hours or even days, but that's something I need you to understand. You know my lifestyle and I told you what it is so toughen up. It's really not a big deal."
"Excuse me? Toughen up? It's not a big deal? You could've called me Rashad! It's four in the morning and I'm here when I'm suppose to be back at my dorm. I have class in a few hours but I choose you over my sleep because that's how much I was worried about you. Next time consider me in your thoughts like I did for you. At least make me feel as though we are on the same page."
I mean has Rashad never been in a real relationship before? How dare he tell me to toughen up as if being emotional behind him is deemed as being weak. He has to understand that he can not talk to me like that. He's not respecting the time that I spent here worried about him and he damn sure is acting like he doesn't care how I feel. I mean is this what it's really like to be with him? To be dismissed like this because if so, I'm good. Maybe he hasn't been in serious relationships to understand that this is unacceptable. Hell maybe he isn't use to having someone to answer to but I'm nothing like those other girls that he dealt with. I deserve more respect then that especially when I am giving him my all.
"Listen..." He sighed as he guided me onto his lap. "I don't want you to have a attitude with me. You're right baby I should have called you and I understand that, but when I'm working baby you have to understand that I'm working."
"And I'm not saying that you can't work. All I am saying is to work on your communication skills when it comes to work."
He nodded. "You're right. I hear you ma and I will remember to be more open with you next time. I'm sorry for making you so worried but I am safe. I appreciate you staying and making sure that I made it back safely."
"Well thank you for saying that because honestly I was feeling a bit unappreciated."
"Absolutely not baby. I understand what I did wrong and I am willing to work on that. I guess it's crazy to say that I am not use to woman challenging me. It's sad to say but I'm honestly use to doing what I want."
I chuckled. "Oh trust me I know but if we are going to be this relationship you have to respect me Rashad. You may not want me to challenge you but I can't promise you that I won't. I'm just as stubborn as you and I won't back down just like you. Not when it comes to my feelings."
Rashad smiled tracing the outline of my jaw with his fingertips. His touch felt amazing. I found myself closing my eyes as I enjoyed his fascination with my face.
"You're right. You know I'd do anything for your princess."
"And I'd do anything for you so don't scare me like that again or else I'll kill you myself."
"Deal." He kissed my lips gave me the biggest hug. "I'll do better next time baby. Now what I want you to do is get in your car and go home."
"What? But I don't want to leave you."
Truthfully I should be going home but what's the point. I can't imagine being anywhere else right now besides Rashad's arm. I was scared that I am almost lost him today and now he wants me to leave?
"Like you said you have class in a few hours and I'm not going to be the reason that you play hookie."
"But Rashad..."
"You're going home now April." He said as he helped me on my feet. He grabbed my bag off the floor leading me to the door.
"But Rashad can't I just—"
"You're going home April." He said once more causing me to roll my eyes in defeat.
"Well what are you about to do? If I have to go home then you have to go to bed. You look exhausted."
I couldn't help but notice the red tint that colored his eyes. I mean he could barely keep his eyelids open. He's been running all day so I'm sure he must be tired and instead of letting me stay to make sure he gets some rest he's kicking me out.
"I'm going to bed after I send them home."
"And when will that be?"
He smirked. "Stop questioning me." He handed me my shoes as he watched me put them on.
"Why are you trying to rush me out? I want to be here with you." I pouted. The closer I got to the door the more upset I became. Why won't he let me stay?
"Because you need to go home." He said as he grabbed my keys off the table. We walked out the door despite my constant pleas to stay.
When we got outside I was shocked to see his friends waiting on the porch. I nearly felt bombarded as I walked down the steps. Rashad told them that he was walking me to my car asked for them to go inside. As expected they did as they were told.
"What's the consequence of disobeying one of your orders?" I asked on the way to the car.
"Death."
"Are you serious?"
He laughed mischievously. "Maybe."
Rashad helped me into the car as I hesitated to start my engine. If there was any chance I could possibly talk my way back into his house I was willing to take it.
"So I really have to go?"
Rashad laughed. "Start the damn car April."
I rolled my eyes turning the key in the ignition. "Fine." I folded my arms. "Are you happy now?"
"How long will it take you to get back to campus?"
"Fifteen minutes if there aren't any cars on the road."
"Good. It's time for you to go."
I sighed. "You promise me you'll get some sleep when they leave?"
He smiled kissing my lips. "That's what I said, right?"
I leaned forward grabbing the back of Rashad's neck before he regained his composure. "Where are you going?" I asked as I pulled him closer to the window. I slid my tongue into his mouth as he quickly kissed me back. I moaned when Rashad wrapped his hand around my neck but his grip was much tighter.
He smiled. "You trying to seduce me, huh?"
"Is it working?"
"I will snatch your ass out of this car right now April."
I smirked. "Do it." I would love nothing in the world for Rashad to snatch me out this car, take me inside his house, throw me on his bed, and make love to me as if nothing else in the world matters. The thought of it made my folds wet.
"Yoo Rashad we gotta wrap this up man." I heard someone say from the doorway. "It's getting late."
I couldn't help but glare at his friend as Rashad pulled away. I was so close to getting my way before this asshole interrupted us. How am I going to convince Rashad to let me stay now? What the hell is so important that Rashad would turn me down just to spend more time with them?
"I have to go now love."
I sighed as I put on my seatbelt preparing to leave. "Goodnight Rashad."
"Have a safe drive baby."
___________
I was barely able to get any sleep because a few hours later I was dragging myself out of the bed for class. Although I struggled to make it through the day a Starbucks coffee with 2 shots of expresso definitely did the trick. Yet I was happy that classes were over because I couldn't wait to see Rashad. I hopped in my car and drove right over to Rashad's place. I didn't even bother on calling. I wasn't in the mood for him to possibly talk me out of coming over. He's not going to get rid of me again this time.
It was a 45 minute drive to Rashad's place due to traffic. When I reached his gate I entered the code and drove inside. As I pulled up to the house I immediately noticed cars parked along his lawn. There was absolutely no space for me to park in the driveway so I ended up parking closer to the gate.
As I made my way back up to the house I could hear the stereo playing. Instead of knocking I decided to let myself in. Yet as soon as I opened the door a man jumped in front of the doorway and scared the living shit out of me.
"Excuse me." I said as I tried to get past him but he wouldn't move. Why the hell wouldn't he get out of my way.
"What's up ma, who are you looking for?"
"Who am I looking for? I clearly just unlocked the door which means I have a key to Rashad's place. So obviously I am looking for Rashad."
"For what?"
"Sir get out of my way."
Has he lost his mind? If I wasted no time letting myself in why in the hell am I being questioned at the door as if I am an unwanted guest. I have permission to visit his house whenever I please and I don't know who this asshole is but he needs to step aside.
"I need to talk to him."
"And who are you?"
"His girlfriend. Who are you?"
What other female would be waltzing in here with a key?
"Rashad is busy ma."
"Well can you tell him that I need to speak to him?
"You can tell him yourself love." He said stepping aside. It's good that he did too because I was two seconds from cursing him the fuck out.
As soon as I walked inside the smell of weed filled my nostrils. I covered my nose as I walked through the house into the living room. As soon as Rashad seen me he rushed to my side.
"April I didn't know you were coming. Why didn't you call?"
"I wanted to see you." I smiled pulling Rashad into my arms.
Rashad smiled. "You should've called me ma."
"I wanted to surprise you. Surprise!"
"I appreciate the visit but right now is not a good time baby."
My smile instantly turned into a frown as I slid my arms from around his neck. "Why not?" I whined. "What are you doing?"
"Taking care of business. You can't just be popping up love. I don't want you to feel like I'm kicking you out when I have to send you home."
I sighed. "But you were with your friends all last night."
"That's because we're handling business. Why don't you go back to campus and I'll come see you later." He suggested as he began walking me back to the front door.
"But I want to stay." I literally flew over here just to see him and he's seriously kicking me out again!
Rashad pulled me onto the porch clearly ignoring my wishes as he pulled me into a hug. He kissed my lips saying, "Go home. I will be by later on tonight."
"Why does it have to be later?"
"Because I said so. Now stop acting like a baby." He chuckled. "I will be by later April."
I sighed as I rolled my eyes. This really bites!
"You better come by."
"I promise. Just let me finish up here."
I hit the locks on my Benz as Rashad helped me inside. "I don't like how your friends treat me." I said as I started my car.
"How do they treat you?"
"They are very rude to me."
"I'll take care of it baby. I promise. Now just go home."