I woke up with a sudden jolt. Sweat dripped down the surface of my face, my breathing was fast. It took about 5 minutes for me to properly get my breathing back to a steady beat and for the sweat on my forehead to stop replenishing.
"I wonder if your real..." i whispered as I stumbled to find the light switch. I sat down at my desk and went on my phone. 'Shit' I thought as I saw the time, it was 3am. I completely forgot to make myself dinner like dad asked me to. He was away at the time on a 'business trip' I knew he was off getting wasted with his friends. I logged into the messenger to see that 707 was online. My heart skipped a beat, I'd always admired him ever since that day I first logged in. He was the most accepting of everyone in the group and I'd developed quite strong feelings for him over time.
Y/N has entered the chatroom
707: Hey U/N!
U/N: Hey Luciel! How ya been?
707: I've been good! Had this strange dream these past few nights though, I was being chased by cats... so many cats...
U/N: Aha! I just woke up from a strange dream actually...
707: Oh? What was about? Spill the beans! >.<
U/N: So basically I was tied to a chair right and next to me was a boy around my age from what I could see also tied up. But he was badly beaten, covered in cuts and bruises. He told me to never forget him. I don't remember his name. It began with sae I think it was? And he had red hair, very red hair...
707: ...
707: Was his name Saeran?
U/N: No it wasn't that...
707: oh okay.. anyways I got to get back to work! See ya!
707 has left the chatroom
He was acting so strange didn't even give me a chance to say goodbye. Was it something I said? Anyway that was nothing to worry about at that moment I had more important things to care about than a stupid goodbye... Going into the bathroom that day I noticed that blood had seeped through the bandages I'd applied yesterday morning. "Fuck" I thought to myself as that meant it was also on my bedsheets.
Slowly undoing the bandages, stings of pain shot through my arm as the fabric clung to my open wounds. This had been a solution to all of my problems for the past 2 years maybe? I just started to feel numb. Empty. Alone... This was the best way to forget all that if even just for a second and feel something more than well... nothing. My dad, he was never around to notice the things wrong with me. He wasn't a bad dad don't get me wrong, he just didn't have the power to save me from myself.
Before re-wrapping up my cuts I jumped in the shower and it wasn't long before the tears came running down the surface of my face again. I felt utterly pathetic just standing there leaning against the wall of the shower tears mixing in with the water that fell on me. The water hit my arms like bullets, everything felt like it was weighing me down.
Stepping out of the shower I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror as I passed by. I was hideous... bags hung underneath my eyes which no longer held the spark and excitement for what was ahead. My hair was horrible I hated the colour, I never suited blonde hair not to mention how long it had grown. My hands were to small, my legs were to short and stubby.
After drying of my hair, putting on pyjamas and sorting out my arms I headed downstairs to the kitchen for something to eat. I settled on a few JaffaCakes, a glass of orange juice and a packet of crisps. It wasn't the healthiest but it didn't matter really. I put SpiderMan: Homecoming on the tv, it was one of my favourites (tom Holland is my actual husband back off 😂💕).
About halfway into the movie I drifted off to sleep, leaving the day behind me and waiting for a new one to begin.
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So this chapter isn't the best but I'm at a block and this is what I'm working with from here I can work on something new and more elaborate! I'm just happy it's finally finished. I hope you liked it and if you did it would be greatly appreciated if you were to vote...? Is that to much to ask for? 😂 anyways I'll have the next chapter out soon and let me know if there's anything you want to see in particular! Alright I'll stop now sorry I talk a lot x