It was Friday morning at J&H, and and Cara was sitting at her desk, staring at her computer screen. She was distracted by thoughts of last night, and wasn't exactly sure how she was feeling. It had all seemed so inevitable, she and Jay finally consumating years of verbal foreplay. But now she worried they had gone too far, especially given their close working relationship.
"What did Jay say to me at the fundraiser? That I'm always complicating things?" she thought. She wished Jay would appear, she was curious how he would act. He was always so composed, no matter what the situation. Cara decided that she would be professional, as if nothing happened while at work. Then hopefully they could grab a drink so that she could talk to him about last night and maybe, after a quick dinner...
Suddenly, raucous laughter could be heard coming down the hallway, from the elevator bank. All heads turned, looking for the source of the inappropriate sound. Cara looked up, curious.
Jay and Erin Jamison were walking from the elevator lobby to the floor, engaged in a conversation that Erin was finding hysterical. Jay said something and she threw her head back and howled. Jay laughed with equal gusto. Cara cringed behind the wall of the cubicle.
Cara noticed with slight annoyance how they walked next to one another, close enough to bump elbows. They were headed towards the small conference room adjacent to Jays office. Cara was relieved when Jay closed the door. The laughter continued, muted.
Cara excused herself and quickly went back to her desk, hoping to pack up and leave before Jay and Erin could emerge from the conference room. She would grab her laptop and head for the cafeteria and work there for a while until the coast was clear. The last thing she wanted to do was bump into Erin and her penetrating eyes.
Just then, her phone buzzed. It was an in house number she didn't recognize, with no identifying name.
"Hello, Cara Raymond!" she said.
"Cara, great you're there!" it was Jay, calling from the conference room. Cara's stomach dropped.
"Hi Jay, Elizabeth and I are in the middle of something. Can I call you later?" she asked nervously.
""Drop everything and come to the conference room by my office. Erin Jamison's here!" he said with enthusiasm.
"Uh, sorry, Jay," she stammered." "But I -"
"Great," Jay said pointedly. "See you in a minute!"
Cara sighed. There was no way out."Please, God, don't let her recognize me," she whispered.
Cara tapped on the door to announce her arrival and entered the conference room. Jay and Erin were seated at the end of the oblong table, again, close enough to touch. Cara felt a spark of jealousy, especially after last night.
"Erin, you remember Cara Raymond, don't you?" Jay asked.
"I certainly do," she answered looking Cara up and down."The dress you wore to my little event was eye catching," she said. " Dear old dad certainly noticed."
"Uh, thank you," Cara said unsure of how to take her comments. "Jay, I don't want to be rude but-" Cara started, backing towards the door. She was uncomfortable with the way Erin was scrutinizing her.
"Cara, this will only take a minute," Jay said with a hint of impatience. "Erin and I were discussing the fund that was set up for Pencils for Promise. It's been showing steady growth but at a low rate. She's looking for someone more aggressive to manage the portfolio." Jay explained."I told her you would be perfect." He looked at her meaningfully.
Caras stomach dropped. She needed to get out of this fast."I'm flattered, and I think this is such a worthwhile cause-" she began but was interrupted when Erin's phone rang.
"Hello, Daddy?" she said, looking at Jay and rolling her eyes. "Yes, I know. Mommy said - uh, would you excuse me for a sec?" Erin got up and left the room, walking down the hall for some privacy.
Jay smiled until she was out of sight. Then he seethed,"Cara, what the fuck are you doing?" he hissed. "This is Jamison's daughter's account we're talking about. Are you nuts?"
Cara thought fast." Jay, I'm just so busy acclimating to my new position, I'm concerned I wont be-"
"Don't be ridiculous. This is nothing. A moron could run this account, but I told Jamison I'd have you manage it so Erin-"
"So Erin what?" she said contemptuously. "Would be satisfied and leave you both alone?"
"Car, don't be-" Jay stopped when Erin walked back in, looking slightly amused. "Any problems?" Erin asked.
Jay glared at Cara. "Of course not," he said changing back to his smooth manner.
" Of course not," echoed Cara robotically.
"Great," said Jay. "My work here is done. If you'll excuse me, I 'll let you ladies get down to business."
Erin rose and walked over to Jay, giving him a two cheek kiss. "Thank you for lunch Jay. I had a great time." Erin looked at Jay hungrily." i would love to take you to the new raw bar that just opened on 22nd Street."
"I'm game!" he said."Take care, Erin, you're in good hands." With a parting wink Jay left the room. Erin's gazed stayed with him.
"Um, Erin, I hadn't expected a meeting with you. Mind if we schedule something later this week when I'm better prepared." Cara tried vainly.
"No, let's get this over with," Erin insisted. "I have no intention of coming here again this week. I'm very busy." Cara has no choice but acquiesce.
After discussing her vision Erin listened to Cara's initial recommendation. Erin nodded in agreement, but her eyes remained cool, appraiising.
"I'll have a full proposal written up and messengered over to you. You can take your time with it and we can discuss any changes you may have over the phone." Cara said hoping to wrap up the meeting.
"Goodness Cara, I'm beginning to think you'd prefer not to do business with me!" Erin said warily.
"Of course I'm happy to manage your fund!" Cara backtracked.
"After all, we're Brown sisters, aren't we?" Erin said searching Caras face. "By the way, we never finished our conversation. What sorority were you in? I don't recall you from the Pi Phis."
Oh God, Cara thought, here we go.." Oh, Dad wouldn't allow me to pledge a sorority until sophomore year. He was insane about the academics." Cara added a fake eye roll for effect but this was the first truth she told; Cara's grades had to be good to keep her scholarship. But her family could neither afford the added expense of Greek life nor could they understand the merit of it. "Marlena is your sister," her dad would say. " Not some stranger!"
"Shame. Must've been tough socially" Erin said. "But I get it, Mommy wouldn't let me live with the Pi Phis my sophomore year since I failed two classes freshman year. It was horrible, I had to slum it in a dorm!"
You bitch, you slummed it on the floor above me, Cara thought.
"God, you look so familiar!" Erin said, staring at her. "What dorm did you say you lived in?"
Cara froze. She could only think of the dorm they had in common. Damn it, how could she get out of this?
"Oh my God!" Cara said suddenly, jumping out of her chair." I forgot, have a conference call! Erin, would you please excuse me?"
Cara hustled out of the room, colliding with Jay."Everything good?" he said.
"Just wonderful." Cara replied angrily.
*************
Cara made herself scarce until she was positive that Erin had left the building. Then she looked around for Jay, anxious to talk. But Jay seemed to be tied up in meetings, so Cara spent the remainder of the day distractedly crunching numbers.
It was close to teh end of the day when Jay finally appeared. He looked tired, but wore his typical grin.
"Jay, do you have a minute?" Cara said as he strolled by her desk, barely acknowledging her.
"Uh, sure, Cara," he said casually. "Let's talk in my office."
Cara grabbed her laptop as cover and followed behind Jay a few paces.
"What's up?" Jay said, rummaging through papers, not making eye contact.
"Um, I wanted o talk to you about Erin's charity," she started, made uncomfortable by his ambivalent attitude.
"Yeah, sorry I was such an asshole to you. I was just surprised how you didn't quite get the situation," he finally looked up and stared meaningfully at her. "You acted pretty unprofessionally."
Cara was stunned, as if he had slapped her. "Well, I..." she needed to come up with a good explanation, but had none. "Listen, Jay, I'm sorry. I'm happy to work with Erin. I was just taken aback."
Jay opened his laptop and began searching thorugh electronic files, as if Cara were no longer there.
"Um, Jay," Cara bgean. Why was he making this so hard on her.
Jay sighed with impatience. "Listen, Cara, its been a long week. I'm exhausted, and I still have hours of work to do. Is there anything else?" he said.
Cara looked down,ashamed. "No, Jay. Nothing." She started to back out of the office.
"Listen, if its about last night," he started.
Cara no longer wanted to talk. She turned and left the office, cheeks burning. She went back to her desk and gathered her things. She had had it. Cara stuffed her laptop into her back, grabbed her handbag out of her drawer and searched aroundher desk for her iPhone. She found it under a pile of folders, slipped into into her bag and turned to leave.
Jay stood there waiting. "Let me walk you to the elevator," he said.
************
When they emeged from the elevator, Jay escorted Cara outside the building. The sky was overcast with a slight breeze. It felt like any moment it would rain.
"Cara," Jay started. "Listen, I don't want you to get angry. Last night was really fun - I've been waiting for years..." he started. "But, I thought a lot about us last night, and I think that maybe it's not the best timing. You and I both just got promoted. How would it look..."
"Jay, no one would have to know," she said and immediately hated the desperation in her voice.
"I wouldn't want our relationship to be that way. You're too special," he said, and took her hand."I think we should cool it a while, no harm done."
"No harm done," Cara echoed vacantly.
"I knew you would agree. We have a lot to accomplish, lets get that done first. The rest will come," he gave her a peck on the cheek and turned to go back into the building.
A drop of rain hit Cara on the face, then another but she stood unable to move. A moment later the rain came down in torrents, and Cara finally woke from her daze and ran into the coffee shop next to her building. She wanted to go back upstairs to grab her umbrella, but she was too embarrassed should she run into Jay again.
Cara ordered a hot tea and sat by the from window watching the rain miserably. She took small sips, glad for the calming taste. She was so disappointed, but once again, it was hard to argue with Jay taking the high road.
Cara mindlessly watched as a large black car pulled to the front of their building. While it was hard to see through the rain rivlets on the window, she was postive she saw a blonde in the back with an upswept hairstyle, just like Erin had worn that day.
Moments later, Jay emerged from the building, ran through the rain and jumped into the backseat of the car. Cara watched as the two faces met in a kiss, and the car slowly pulled away from the curb.