Sunday 15th
The first time I woke up next to a boy, I was terrified. The second my eyes opened and I saw him, my mind stopped working, my hands throbbed with sweat and there was a deep pit of nerves eating at my insides. It was like coming out of a test at school, realising you couldn't go back and change what you'd written. Looking up the answers and knowing you done it all wrong. Waking up next to Isaac felt wrong.
But waking up next to Ash, I'd never felt calmer.
He must have felt so to because when he rolled on his back, groaning out an incoherent mumble, a lazy smile covered his lips. I shifted on my side, looking at him from my pillow through hooded eyes. We stayed like that until late into the morning when Ash told me he had to go.
I walked him to the door, smiling to myself at the sight of him in his wrinkled shirt and slacks from last night. He had his own lopsided grin on his lips as he hovered by the door frame.
"You're sure you can't stay?" I asked him, peering at him through my lashes as he shrugged on his green bomber.
"I promised the boys I'd help them with something," Ash re-explained, adjusting the flat collar of his jacket and zipping it up his chest, "I wish I could though."
"You enjoy my company that much?" I teased.
"You think to highly of yourself," he dared, unaware of the pull his boyish grin had on my heart strings, "If I was staying for anything it would be that bed, it's the comfiest thing I've ever slept on."
"So that's the reason you were smiling like mad when you woke up," I replied smugly, rocking back and forth of the bare pads of my feet.
Ash gazed back at me, amusement consuming is expression, "The reason exactly," He nodded.
My brows cocked up challengingly as I grinned, "If you say so."
A muffled ping of a mobile interrupted us, the sound coming from his jacket pocket. Dragging his eyes away from mine, he checked his phone, pulling it out and assessing the message.
"Sorry," He frowned, brows knitted as he quickly typed back a reply, "I really got to go."
"Course, that's fine," I insisted, pushing off the door and stepping in front of him, "Go."
A rough sigh filtered through Ash's lips and settled across my face, "Thanks for last night," He said, his smile softening when he looked back up at me.
"Thanks for coming," I said hesitating suddenly. We both stepped forward, slow and careful, and I willingly let Ash take me into his arms. He pulled me close, circling his hands round my back and pressing them flat against the fabric at the small of my back. I sighed against his chest, smiling into his puffy jacket and holding my arms around his shoulders.
We didn't hold for long, parting a few seconds later. Asher drew his hands from my back and let his legs slowly start to lead him backwards towards the elevator door. His thumb pressed down on the button but his eyes remained solely on me.
"Oh," He smirked, behind him the doors sliding open, "I forgot."
"What?" I questioned, frowning as he stepped into the mirrored elevator. He still faced me, grinning as he held a hand to the door to stop it from closing.
"Remember you still owe me that night out," He reminded me.
"I haven't forgot," I assured attempting to keep a straight face but failing miserably. Asher was failing too though, a huge grin swept across his expression.
"Good," He mused, retrieving his hand and letting the doors begin to slide close, "Speak to you later."
"Bye."
*
The fact that it was Sunday had no effect on my friends plan of events for the night. Even with school in the morning Ivy had managed to coax us all into spending the evening out for dinner.
My brothers, Chester, Fleur, and I all sat around the table listening to Ivy babble on as usual, her grinning lips running wild as they recalled her Saturday night.
"Stop being modest," Ivy chimed, waggling a pointed nail in Fleur's direction, "He was all over you
Fleur puffed out a tired sigh for what felt like the tenth time tonight, eyes narrowing at Ivy, "He wasn't all over me."
"He was practically drooling at the mouth Fleur," Ivy exclaimed, straightening up in her chair and leaning attentively on the table, "I swear when you said you'd go on another date he nearly fell off his chair."
Exaggeration was another one of Ivy's quirks but I found myself laughing at the thought at least. Not because I thought Fleur having that effect on someone was funny but because of how frustrated Fleur appeared right now with Ivy.
"You're being dramatic," She said interrupting Ivy and throwing her arms across her chair in an attempt of feigning anger.
"I'm not," Ivy snapped, throwing her arms up in a defensive shrug.
"Well dramatic or not sounds like he liked you Fleur," Chester said easing some of the growing tension between the two girls.
"When are you seeing him again?" I asked Fleur, who sat beside me dressed in a white frilled top and stripped blue trousers. A muted set of colours compared to the shiny light pink dress that hugged Ivy's figure.
"I don't know," Fleur hummed, gnawing her bottom lip between her teeth, "I was hoping we could go out again as a group, relieve some pressure."
Ivy's grin grew, her cheeks pinching in two large circles as she nodded, "I definitely wouldn't mind seeing Josh again."
"You should bring him next Friday to the Outset Fleur," I suggested, ignoring the scandalous glimmer in Ivy's eyes. The same eyes that snapped to me as soon as the idea left my lips.
"No, no way," She chided, shaking her head, "You're not included in the group."
"What? Why?"
"Because you bailed first time," She announced, a mask of seriousness covering her features that I attempted to decipher if was real or not.
"I had dinner with Oliver and Grace," I clarified in case she was listening the so many times I'd said it before.
One of her shaped brows cocked upwards towards her freshly dyed roots, "And you couldn't come and meet us afterwards?"
I bit back an agitated scoff, reasoning with her instead, "I already said, we were out late."
"So were we," Ivy retaliated, "Was going home alone to do nothing better than finding us?"
The consideration of telling her that I never went home alone, came to mind. I thought of shoving it in her face, letting her know that I had someone with me and while we didn't do a lot, we still went to bed together. Which I'd guessed was more than she and Josh did.
But a thought was all it was. My mouth stayed shut and if to save me from myself, my brother interrupted and spoke across the table to me, "Andra, I'm going for a fag. Come with?"
"Yeah," I sighed, standing up from my seat and following behind Oliver as he led us to the entrance of the restaurant. We slipped outside into the city street, ushering ourselves to the side of the pavement where we wouldn't be in anyone's way.
"So," Oliver said, drawing out his sentence as he put a cigarette between his lips and lit it, "Last night."
I watched as he inhaled slowly and then puffed out a cloud of smoke, "If you're going to ask about what I think, I'd rather not talk about it," I said, crossing my arms and rubbing my hands up and down my arms to keep warm.
"Ok, I get it," Oliver released a small chuckle, his lips curving around the small cigarette that sat between them, "You don't want talk about boys to your brother I get it. I just wanted to say that I thought he was cool."
"You did?" I perplexed, frowning in confusion. I'd already guessed from the lack of violence last night that Oliver could stand Asher, but liking him was another ball game.
"Yeah," Oliver nodded, his smiling dimming slightly as he pulled the fag from his mouth and blew out again, "I mean I can't say Cas will be as accepting."
"You don't think he'll like him?" I questioned, my eyes running to the window of the restaurant and finding my other brother at the table. He sat next to Chester, an arm thrown over the back of his chair, grinning as he talked.
He may be the more protective out of the twins but out of everyone I thought he'd be the one who'd get on best with Asher. With similar sense of humours and a shared liking of rock bands, I'd been hoping to introduce them two next.
"It's not that, it's just that-," Oliver paused, finding the right words for what he was trying to explain, "Asher's - you know, Jonathans son."
I knew what he was attempting to hint at, I just didn't understand how it would be relevant.
"Caspian wouldn't be that petty," I insisted, my arms tightening over my chest.
"All I'm saying is, I can look past it," Oliver told me, taking another long drag of his cigarette, "I get that Ash isn't his dad. I'd never blame him for the things his dads done. But Caspian, he's still angry. He's still not over it."
"You think I am?" I sneered, the tone of my voice more vicious than I'd intended.
"No, and neither am I. I'll never like Jonathan, not after he put those ideas in mum's head about Alex," Oliver said, "I'm just trying to warn you that Caspian might not find it as easy to separate Ash from his dad."
"So, you think I shouldn't tell him?" I reiterated, aware of how important it was that when Ash and Caspian meet it was on good terms.
"I don't know, maybe just build up to it," my brother suggested, his lips twitching into a smirk and eyes narrowing sideways to me, "Try not to spring Ash on him randomly at a dinner."
A shy blush lit my cheeks and I stared up at Oliver coyly, "Sorry about that."
Oliver laughed, flicking his near done cigarette to the floor and stubbing it out with his shoe, "It's fine," he assured me.
With his cigarette finished I took a step in the direction of the door, my hand grazing the large metal handle. Oliver caught my wrist before I could pull it open, nudging me back into my original spot on the sidewalk, "Andra?"
"Yeah?"
"Did you tell Ash about Alex?" Oliver questioned, his forehead creased with a mixture of concern and curiosity.
I shook my head, my hands fallen to my side now and tucked in my white vintage jean pockets, "No."
"Not what his dad did?" Oliver refined his question, asking again.
"No," I confirmed, "I haven't said anything."
"Why?"
"Because he hates his dad enough already," I explained, Asher's face whenever his dad's mentioned engraved on my mind, "He doesn't need another reason."
"Ok," Oliver said, his mouth opening to say something else but cut off when my phone chimed. My ringtone blared from my back pocket and I slipped it out and checked the Id. Oliver waved his hands dismissingly, walking to the restaurant doors, "You take it. I'm going to head in."
He barely left me with another choice as he opened the door and slid back inside. By the time the door shut on me, my phone was on its fourth ring.
I slid my finger across the screen, accepting the call and pressing my phone to my ear, "Hello?" I said.
"Hi Andra," A deep male voice came through the line, "It's Kyle Smith, your father's assistant."
"Hi Kyle," I greeted despite the confused frown threading into my expression, "How are you?"
"I'm good thank you," Kyle chirped, a little too happy for a man about to face a Monday morning of work tomorrow, "I hope I'm not disturbing you, I'm sorry to call but I completely forget to yesterday."
"It's fine," I reassured him kindly, "Is everything ok?"
"Yes, I just have something I needed to ask you quickly," Kyle paused, waiting for me to reply before telling me exactly what he needed to ask.
"What is it?" I asked.
"Well earlier this week we had a company in concerning the model of your father's latest hotel in Beijing," Kyle went on, explaining to me the situation, "Whilst they were here they somehow came across some of the sketches you left with your father and wanted to know if they could be given your contact details to reach out to you with. I was just wanted to check with you that you were ok with me handing them your details?"
I wanted to be focused on what he was saying, excited even but I was distracted. On the edge of the pavement a large black car pulled up at the curb and the back door swung open. Ducking out of the door frame, Ash appeared.
In the same clothes as this morning, his creased slacks and green jacket, he brushed himself down as he hovered by the car.
"Erm, yeah," I stammered for words, to concentrated on Asher who had yet to notice me to the side of the restaurant he'd pulled up outside, "That's fine."
"Ok, great," Kyle approved, "I'll pass it to them tomorrow."
"Ok, thank you Kyle," I said in a rush, hoping I didn't sound too rude, "I really have to go."
"Of course," He spoke, "Speak to you soon Andra."
"Bye Kyle," I responded quickly before dropping the phone from my ear and ending the call. I shoved it back in my pocket and steered myself in the path of Asher.
"Ash?" I called out his name, my chin lifted high so he might see my face, "Ash."
It didn't take him long to hear then find me, his eyes running over the dimmed thread of people and settling on me, "Andra."
"What are you doing here?" I asked him, once again staring down at his clothes from the night before.
Ash hesitated, words prolonged on his tongue, "I'm -."
But he never got to answer, the person stepping out of the car next made sure of that. From inside, Jonathan appeared, climbing out to his full height beside his son whose moth had clamped shut.
"Oh, Alessandra," Jonathan said taken by surprise by my appearance, "How nice to see you."
"Mr Hollis," I dipped my head as politely as I could in Jonathan's direction, taming the flares of irritation sparking inside me.
Jonathan's hand gripped the car door and shut it behind him, "How are you?" he asked me, turning to face the two of us and brushing down his crisply clean suit.
"I'm good," I said, a thin, forced smile tightening on my lips, "You?"
"I'm great," He chimed, flashing his white teeth in my direction, "Glad to finally be sitting down though. We've been on our feet all day."
My eyes narrowed towards Ash, my jaw slacked and brows furrowed, "You spent the day in London?"
"Yes," Jonathan answered for him, barely taking notice of my confused exterior and pointed glares at his son, "I gave Asher a tour around the city."
"Asher," I uttered his name, staring at the boy who hours earlier I'd woken up next to.
"Yes, my son," Asher's father clarified, his hand shooting out to Ash's shoulder, clasping tight around his jacket, "You remember him?"
Ash's shoulder squared underneath Jonathan's grip, brushing off the contact. He stood stiffly beside his father, eyes glued to the pavement though he was too ashamed t meet my eyes.
"I remember him," I nodded, "From the meal."
"Yes, the meal," Jonathan confirmed, clicking is fingers. With his hand held high, his index finger sharpened and jutted between his son and me, "Maybe next time you could give him a tour Andra."
An abrupt, arrogant noise passed Asher's mouth and his features screwed up in annoyance, "I'm not a kid, I can get around by myself,"
"He says now," Jonathan chuckled condescendingly, finding it all too easy to ignore Asher's comment. He brought his hand to Ash's back and threw a hard pat against it, motioning with his head toward the restaurant, "We really should go in now, we made a reservation. Lovely speaking to you Alessandra."
I bit down on the inside of my cheek, holding back all the horrible things I wanted to say and instead settling for, "You too."
Jonathan moved away from the car, stepping between me and Asher and walking towards the restaurant. He was in the middle of the pavement when he realised that Asher hadn't moved an inch yet, "You coming Asher?" he asked over his shoulder.
"I'll be in in a second," Ash told me, the strictness of his voice leaving no room for Jonathan to dispose. Instead he simply nodded his head and walked the rest of the way across the sidewalk. Stepping inside the building he left us two alone. Neither of us said anything at first, just sort of stared at each other in uncertainty.
"So," I sighed, swallowing down the bitter aftertaste Jonathan's presence had left me with, "Unless Drake and Marley are already inside I'm going to take it you were lying earlier."
A rough breath of air hung from Asher's lips, his head shaking, "I never lied."
"So you went to see them before meeting with your dad?" I asked.
He paused, his eyes finally finding mine as a faltered exhale rolled off his chest, "No."
"So you did lie," My words came out in a bitter laugh, my stare piercing into Asher.
"I'd say it was more sparing you the details," Ash said, his expression void of too much emotion. I wondered what had happened between now and that morning that changed him completely, to have him go back to the person I remembered arguing with.
"I don't need sparing," I cut in sharply, sudden bursts of anger taking hold of me, "Why did you lie?"
Asher stepped away from me, angling his body towards the restaurant. I caught onto his arm before he could go anywhere, holding him still.
"I've got to go in," Ash said, his jaw muscles tightening beneath his skin and his arm pulling free of my grip like he had his dad's before. I could tell he was trying to get me to back off but he was going to fail. Whether or not it meant a good or bad result, I wouldn't hold my tongue tonight. I was done watching what I said around him.
"Don't just leave," I fumed, feeling fire run through every ounce of my body, "Just tell me why you lied."
Ash's eyes flickered close and his head shook lightly, side to side as he sighed a reply, "I can't do this right now Andra."
"Oh sorry," Sarcastically I retorted, "Is wanting the truth too much of an ask for you?"
"Stop it," Ash instructed underneath his breath, his voice strict and cold. I felt like I was back to that same place with him. The place where I was unable to understand him, his face unreadable, his cards held close to his chest.
"I'll stop when you answer me," I insisted, confusion and anger stirring up a dangerous mixture in my blood, "Why didn't you just say you were meeting your dad?"
"Because it's none of your business," Asher's expression took the form of a scowl, his tone vicious, "Who I meet and what I do has nothing to do with you."
"Why are you acting like this?" I asked, my voice barely audible. My anger slowly morphed to upset, the sight of him pulling away like torture to me.
"Like what?" He grunted.
"Like someone who doesn't care," I told him, not missing the way he'd been avoiding eye contact. My hand reached out to his arm again, begging for him to look at me, but he only shrugged me off.
"I don't care Andra," Asher said, his words cutting through me like a knife. I didn't know if he could tell what he was doing to me, how much it hurt to be arguing with him.
"I know you do," I said, my skin paling and my pulse slowing, "Just stop fighting and talk to me."
"There's nothing to talk about," Ash said, his hardened eyes sparing me the quickest glance before his back turned and he walked away. Not another word was said as he slipped inside the restaurant and left me alone in the street, clueless as to what had just happened.