⚠️[WARNING: 18+]⚠️
This chapter contains sexual content/violence.
''Am I what your heart desires?''
I whispered into Jimins ear.
He didn't move or say anything. He was asleep.
''Let's go to the doctor when you wake up, you've hurt yourself pretty badly''
I whispered again and pressed myself against his body. I closed my eyes and tried to sleep.
I felt his body move and his head came closer to mine.
''You are more than my heart desires''
He whispered back as he locked me up in his arms.
--
I woke up as my phone rang louldly. Who would call me this early? I looked at my screen and saw a name I'd never expect. It was Taehyung.
''H-Hey it's Aliah''
My heart started to beat loudly. I remember our fights.. he never liked me.
''Hello, its's me Tae.. um I heard Jimin is free? Is he with you?''
I looked over next to me and saw Jimin sleeping, he looked like an angel.
''Yes he is, but he is asleep. I'll tell him to call you back''
I wanted to hang up, I was too damn nervous to suddenly talk with him again.
''Wait Aliah, I want to come and see him, I mean we want to see him. Can you.. tell us where you guys are?''
''uh yea sure.. um I.. I don't know actually.. we don't have an adress''
Our house was somewhere in the middle of nowhere, I didn't even know how you could get here.
''What?? That's the biggest bullshit I've ever heard. Listen I know you just say that because you don't want us to meet him, but we are his damn friends, you can't just take away Jimin from us, like you've did these past few years! He needs us, and we need him, so stop making up bullshit and tell us where it is!''
I heard some other noises on the back and suddenly another voice was speaking.
''Aliah hello? It's me Namjoon''
He had taken the phone from Taehyung because he suddenly freaked out. It's a good thing he took it over, before I'd lose my shit too.
"Hi Namjoon, I'm so sorry that was really not what I meant. Maybe we can meet up somewhere else? I will bring Jimin with me''
''Oh that's a good idea. Can we meet up in the bighit building?''
Oh god.. that building.. that damn building is filled with memories. The place I met Jimin for the first time, the place where so much drama happened with us and Yoona. Was I ready to go there again?? It has been like 7 years.
"Uhm.. yeh that's fine.''
I just couldn't say no.
I hang up after setting the date and sighed. I looked over to Jimin. A smile appeared on my face.
He is finally free.. we can do anything we want, without being watched.. without being afraid of being caught. We can finally do all that. We can finally live as husband and wife.
The members don't even know we are married now. Well I guess we'll tell them tomorrow when we'll meet them.
Suddenly a feel of fear went through my body. It's not over yet. I can't be too happy. Jimin is not saved yet.. he isn't healed yet. Being in a house, that is somewhere far away from the others.. what will happen to me?
What will happen to us?
I'm afraid one day we..
we will get killed by eachother.
And there will be no one to stop us.
Because we are both able to kill. To do anything for eachother.
And we both love the thrill of it.
''Were you talking to someone?''
I heard him suddenly say. His voice sounded tired and weak. I turned around and faced him.
''Oh goodmorning Jimin!''
I said with a big smile. I could at least try to act as new leads.
''Did you sleep well??''
I said while taking off my shirt to change.
''Not really.. my head was hurting like hell''
He was looking at me while I dressed up.
''Well no one told you to bang your head against that damn mirror''
He laughed and stood up from the bed.
''And no one told you to strip down babe''
I looked at him as he walked closer.
"I-I am not strpping! I'm just changing okay..''
''What a shame.. I'm actually dying to see you strip down infront of me''
He put his arms around my bare skin.
I awkwardly smiled at him
''Why are you acting all shy now Aliah? Last night you didn't seem shy at all while doing somethinhg you know is forbidden.''
I pushed myself out of his grip.
Last night.. I forced myself on him, while he was too weak. I did something terrible. I made use of the situation.. of his weakness.
''Jimin I'm sorry, I know it was wrong.. I shouldn't have done that. I hope you can once just forgive me for my mistakes. Cause that's what normal people do. They forgive.. so why can't we be like that? Why do you always have to make me a victim to your games. Why do you always treat me as your slave? I'm your damn wife now! So please Jimin.. treat me as your wife.. cause it's the only way we'll be able to stay with eachother. It's the only way to be sure they won't take you away from me again.''
This time I wanted things to change. Because the world finally let us be together. I knew if we made one little mistake, he would be taken away from me again. I had to do everything I could, to keep him. I had to make sure he wouldn't be stolen from me again.
He was the only desire I had.
''My wife huh? I love the sound of it.. but Aliah you have to know that, no matter what you are to me, I will never be able to treat you right.''
He traced his finger over my cheek.
''You know I want you in the worst way''
His finger touched my bottom lip.
''And that's exactly what you want too. You like the way I treat you badly. You want all of it. Maybe the only thing I am to you is a desire.. maybe it has never been love''
I pushed his hand away.
''How can you say that!''
I screamed while my eyes got filled with tears.
''How dare you to say.. that I never loved you..''
He grabbed my chin tightly and pushed my face up.
''If you really love me then why.. are you trying to keep me from meeting the members? You know I want to see them, you know how much I need them, but you have been trying to hide me from them, you have been trying to break us apart, you kept lying to me and to them. But I know everything now Aliah. I've heard your Phone call.. and what Taehyung said to you, it was all true. And now thinking back, you've been trying to take us apart from a long time ago. And you actually succeeded.. because you payed Bang pd nim to keep the members from meeting me, you went to him and planned it all, you fucking made me believe that the members left me behind and never came to see me because THEY HATED ME! But that was all a set up, it was ALL YOU!''
I desperatley started to laugh.
''Yes.. that's right Jimin. You found out about it.. you found out that you're not the only liar here Jimin. It's true.. it's true that I want you all for myself. I lied to you about the members.. yes I made Bang PD stop them from meeting you. I made them believe it was for your own good and I made you believe they didn't want you anymore. But now it makes us even don't you think? We've both hurt eachother by making up a big lie.. and we both made eachother suffer by it. It makes me just as bad as you.. but I only did it because I love you so much Jimin. Just like you love me.''
I grabbed his face in my hands and pressed my lips on his harshly.
He pulled his face away and grabbed my hands.
''You made a big mistake Aliah. I am the only one who is allowed to hurt. You have crossed the line this time. There is no way I can let you get away with it''
I walked away from him as he kept walking closer to me.
''You're saying you are the only one who can lock me away in this house, who can keep me away from the others, who can let me suffer daily?!''
''That's right. But don't worry, I will make you enjoy it all. Just like you always did.''
''No Jimin.. just stay away. Don't dare to come near me again. Just stop making me crazy!''
I walked out of the room and slammed the door.
Damn.. he can make so damn angry. I hate the way he makes me feel!
I just don't want to see that damn face for a while, seeing that face is what makes me suffer.
I went into the shower and let my body relax. It was our first morning as a married couple, why did it had to go like this..
I know I fucked up. What I did to him and the members, it's unforgiveable. I knew what I did was more than wrong. But everything I've been doing since I met Jimin is wrong.
The door of the shower got open and I saw Jimin stand there naked.
Damn.. I love seeing his naked body.
I turned myself around to not face him. He had to know I was angry at him.
He came into the shower and wrapped his naked body around me. He held me tightly in his arms and kissed the side of my face, as the water was pouring over us. His hand grabbed my boobs tightly.
''Are you mad at me babe?''
he said into my ear.
''I told you that I didn't want to see you Jimin''
His hands were touching all over my body.
''You don't have to see me like this. All you have to do is feel my touch''
His voice said through the sound of the water splashing on the ground.
My back was pressed against his body so I couldn't see his face.
He pressed me harder against his body.
''I don't want you to be here.. I need to be alone now''
his hand was feeling my tigh, going up to my ass.
''We both know that's a lie''
He whispered and licked my neck.
I turned my body around in his grip and looked in his eyes.
''Yeh.. you're right''
I closed my eyes and leaned in to his touch.
I felt his tongue on my neck, sucking and biting. His face went up and he kissed me, letting his tongue go into my mouth. I held on tightly to his body, cause it was slippery and small in the shower. He kissed me deep and harsh, making my lips bleed again.
He turned my body around and I held on to the glass infront of me. I tried so hard not to slip in that damn small place.
He gave me kisses on my back while he was touching my boobs. I moaned out to his touches, as the water was beating down on us.
He let his lenght slide into me from behind and I screamed out the pleasure. All the water that was pouring, went into my lungs, making me a breathing mess.
He slammed hard into me from behind and my body started to move in all directions, as the water kept going into my mouth.
He started to move faster and pinched my boobs harder as his speed made my whole body slip into the shower. But his grip around me was too tight to let me fall. I felt like I was drowning, while feeling all the pain in me that he was giving me.
''Jimin.. I keep slipping, I can't hold on''
The speed of him slamming into me, was giving me a hard time to stand and avoid me from slipping.
''Don't worry, I won't let go of your body"
He said while breathing loudly.
I was such a mess from all the water that was pouring and the speed of Jimin slamming his dick in me in this small and slippery space.
And it was exactly what made me feel so damn good.
''It hurts..''
He slammed into me so hard that I lost my balance. I gave up on trying to hold up my body. But he kept my body up with his grip.
''Hold on a little more Aliah''
He groaned as he came into me and released his dick.
I wanted to throw my body on the ground but Jimin held me tight.
''I will always take care of you Aliah''
He kissed me on my lips.
''I will take good care of my precious wife''
--
He walked me out of the shower and put a towel around my wet body. I grabbed him and kneeled down infront of him.
''Let me taste you Jimin''
I took his dick into my hand.
I looked up to him.
''Please..''
He stood still and watched me as I begged him to suck him.
''Go ahead, but I will only give you one minute.''
I rubbed his length in my hand and bended over. I was struggling because my ass was burning from the shower sex we just had.
I put my mouth around his dick and started to lick the top of it. I wasn't really good at this because I had no experience in sucking dicks.
His hand grabbed my hair and he trusted his dick deeper in my mouth.
''Let me help you just a little Aliah''
shit.
I wanted him to be proud of me. I wanted to make him feel good. I didn't want to seem like I needed his help.
I started to suck and move my mouth around his dick. My time was running, I had to hurry.
He groaned as I was sucking him.
I moved my mouth faster, making him come in my mouth. I took in all his cum and swallowd it.
''Your minute is over. You did good babe''
I wrapped his body into my towel and he kissed me.
''Now go make yourself ready cause we are leaving in 10 minutes''
He said as we were still pressed against eachother.
''What? Were are we going?''
''I called Taehyung back and told them we will meet up today, I want you to apologise for what you did''
He looked at me as I was getting nervous. I didn't want to see them. They must already know about it. How can I face them..
''No I don't want to go.. just please Jimin, let's stay home! What's the point of seeing them? Am I not enough for you Jimin?!''
I pushed him away.
I was too afraid that he would abonden me. That he would leave me for the members. And I knew I was crazy for thinking that way.
''Aliah listen to me!''
He grabbed my wrist.
''You are going with me and you are going to make it up to them understand?! You took away something important from me while I've been sick. Maybe they were the ones I needed to be healed, and not you who were only behaving like a damn whore and nothing more!''
"You were the fucking person who made me behave like your whore!''
He grabbed me and pulled me into the bedroom.
''Go and put on your damn clothes, we have to leave''
I stood still, not taking his order.
''NOW!''
He yelled at me, his veins were popping into his neck. He was angry.
He grabbed a shirt and forced me in it.
"Stop! I won't take your damn orders anymore!''
He grabbed some underwear and pushed me on the bed. He put them on me as I tried to stop him.
''I will make you Aliah''
He grabbed his own clothes and put them on as he locked the room so I couldn't escape.
He grabbed my jacket and put it around me.
''You can't make me come with you!''
He lifted up my body and walked out of the room.
''I can, and there is nothing you can do to stop me''
He walked to the car with me on his shoulder. He made me sit in the car and closed the door.
''You've been a really bad girl Aliah, I think I should punish you harder to make you understand''
I didn't talk to him as he was driving. I fucking hate him.
He parked the car and grabbed my hand.
''Just try and behave yourself''
I looked at him and pulled my hand out of his grip.
''Why should I? All I can do is behave like a whore remember''
He sighed at me and rolled his eyes.
''Just get out of the car and let's go.''
I didn't want to leave the car and see the others. I didn't want Jimin to be with the others. I couldn't take it to see him with someone else, to see him being happy with someone else.
It would break me..
Because all I would think is..
He'd be better off without me.
He'd be happier with them.
He will leave me for them.
And I can't help but to think like that.
Jimin opened my door and grabbed me. He pulled me out of the car and grabbed my hand.
"Jimin.. I don't want to do this. I don't think I will be able to handle it. I'd rather die.."
He put his arms around me and hugged me.
"I know you can do it Aliah. There is nothing to be afraid of. I promise you, that I will never leave you"
We walked as he held my hand tightly. There was a big sea next to the building. I remember this place, I remember the old times..
We walked into the room were the members were waiting. They all stood up and ran to Jimin. They were so happy to see him.
They hugged eachother and yelled all kind of things. I was just standing in the corner, watching what was happening.
How could I.. take them away from him.
I was a horrible human being. And the worst thing was that even at that moment I still hated seeing him with the members.
I hated to see him laugh with someone else.
It made me wanted to do terrible things.
It made me want to hurt myself.
He must hate me.. I couldn't help him when he needed me. I was supposed to heal him.. but he only saw me as a whore.. the only thing he needed were the members.
He said it himself.
How can I live with that?
I know he will abonden me. I just know the members mean so much more to him.
I should abonden myself before he can.
I don't deserve to live.
Because it's hurting me to see him smile. It's hurting me to see him happy.
I want to be the only reason for his smile.
And I hate myself for feeling like that.
It makes me believe I don't deserve to be on this planet, to be with him.
It makes me want to kill myself.
I watched him and the members talk and laugh. Why was I hurting so damn much. Why was I so damn afraid.
He was so happy with them. And I took it all away from him.
It was from the moment I came into his life, that things got ruined.
I couldn't handle the feeling anymore. The fear, the guilt of taking away his happiness.
He was right. He needed them. Not me.
I was the very reason for his suffering.
I stood up and walked out of the room. They didn't notice me because they were too busy talking.
I went outside and walked to the sea. I looked up to the sky.
"You're all I want Jimin."
My biggest fear in life used to be water. I never really knew how to swim, and I feared it so much.
But now..
My biggest fear in life is you, Jimin.
I climbed on the hill.
And I want to get rid of this fear.
I held out my arms and closed my eyes.
They say, your oldest fear is your worst fear. And to get rid of my old fear..
I must jump.
And so I did.
I jumped and got rid of my fears.
And I made him get rid of me, the one who was stopping him from living a happy life.
But now, I made him happy again.
I finally saved him.
_________________________
HERE IS THE NEW CHAPTHER!! Ow nooo Aliah don't kill yourself😱 We still love you😭
Anywayss don't forget to vote and comment what you think!! And thanks again for reading my story, it makes me so damn happy! :D
I really hope you enjoyed it and I see ya in my next chap!✌️❤