"Why didn't she tell me about it?" I asked again, staring into the invitation in the dark. "What, she just wants to freak me out by disappearing the next day and just left it in a place she knew I'd look?"
Niall sighed and lifted his blindfold, "Mate, you have to calm yourself down. Maybe Taylor couldn't tell you, it's not that easy, definitely not for her." Wow, for all I thought, I was talking to myself.
"Leaving it on my dartboard with it awfully reeking of my cologne was her solution," I muttered, still flipping the wedding invitation in my hand. "Honestly, Niall, why would she do that?"
He shrugged, "Go to sleep, you've got a wedding to crash." And then he turned his back on me.
"I need an answer first."
"Harry, go to sleep. You're obviously charmed by her," he mumbled the last part. . . and no offence, it doesn't match up with the sentence.
"Alright, alright," I muttered and leaned my head back. I suppose it'll be a long flight.
I did not need to be jet lagged. . .
The moment we got to the terminal and finally got on land. Niall handed me a cup of coffee, knowing I barely got any sleep as I was jittery the entire ride. We agreed to take a seat first before everything while Aerielle calls out the rest of the gang to know the situation of the wedding. It hasn't started yet, that's all I know.
"You know, I don't get you," Niall said. "You let it slide for eight years, your motto was actually, 'what happens in Canada stays in Canada,' and now you're chasing the girl of your dreams. . . from Canada."
Aerielle took a break in the bathroom and came out wearing a dress, silver in colour. She could have told us about that, I almost forgot about the formal thingy but Niall suggested that we could just get dressed in the taxi as we were both already wearing white.
I took a sip from my drink and rubbed my eyes, "I've been busy building my life, Neil, the last part of the puzzle should be the hardest to get. Shall we go?"
I looked at my watch and it's already nine seventeen.
"Right, we should go," He agreed. "Aers, how's the event?"
Aerielle ended the call, "We're still good to go, the bride haven't arrived yet. How are we supposed to get there?"
"How long would it take to rent a car?" I asked, "Neo can drive faster than taxis."
"That'll take longer, let's just go with the taxi," Aerielle said. "Come on if you want to reach your girl!"
"Right," I mumbled. I took my duffel bag and drank the rest of my coffee –which I regretted seeing as it was still steamy hot, it slightly burned my throat but the rest of the running-to-get-a-taxi sort of fixed it.
Aerielle rode shotgun while Niall and I are in the backseat. She's still holding her phone. Niall told the driver which chapel –I don't really remember– and then we hit the road.
The car ride was rather unsettling, I couldn't stay focused. I felt like a child with ADHD, I felt like I wanted to just go out and run.
"They're livefeeding the wedding?!" Aerielle exclaimed so Neo and I immediately leaned towards her back and looked at her phone screen.
My eyes widened at the scene outside of the church, there's still about thirty minutes before the wedding and I can see a load of people wearing formal suits and gowns. The motif seemed to be black, white and silver?!
I blinked a few times, "Don't you think it's odd that she used a green invitation in a wedding with a silver motif?"
Niall laughed, "We have different coloured invitations, Harry, mine's blue."
"Mine is gold," Aerielle said and showed her invitation. Huh.
"I can't believe I'm going to wear my old uniform in that!" I exclaimed.
Aerielle rolled her eyes, "It'll work! It won't even look like a uniform, just lose the badge. We can cover it."
"Let's see," I mumbled. I am so glad I am wearing a plain white collared polo.
I took my jacket off.
"Hey, wh-what are you doing?" Niall asked.
"What does it look like?" I asked rhetorically as I opened my bag. I dug in to see if there was my old sweater slash blazer, not sure, and it was there. I put it on but left it open, "It actually still fits." I am also very thankful of wearing dark pants, even if I wear my old slacks over it, it wouldn't be that obvious that it's a few inches short. Plus I'm wearing black running shoes.
Damn, I'm still AM.
"You need a tie," Aerielle said and then looked into her bag. "Good for you, I'm obsessed with them." She handed me a red tie.
"This'll work, thanks Aers," I said and put it over my head and under my collar. I am also thankful that my mum taught me to wear a tie properly.
Niall sat as far away from me as I put on every single thing I have. Niall did the same but faster.
"Damn we look awesome," he said, the moment we got ourselves fixed.
"One last thing," Aerielle said and handed us those fake flowers with the pins? I've no idea what they're called.
"What are these for?" I asked.
"Just put them on! Right chest," She instructed and so we did. I can already see the driver's confused face on the rearview mirror.
And as the ride grew close to the destination, Aerielle gasped at her phone, alarming the two of us.
"What?" I asked.
"What is it?"
"They're starting," she said and that alarmed me even more.
"They're what?!" Niall yelled.
"I thought it was ten AM?!" I almost yelled but either way, my voice was loud enough.
"Apparently, it's nine forty," she said. "Sir, could you please hurry up? It's sort of important."
"Nine —" I looked my watch. "Five minutes, can we make it?"
"Yes, we can," Niall said, looking out of the window, "We can make it." For the first time today, he sounded optimistic. . . very optimistic.
My heart went running wild. If it were actually running, I'd think it'd get to the chapel after a split second.
"I've never done this before," I mumbled. I have no idea what to do, all I know is I'm stopping it and that's it. I've got a fair view of role models in the movies, that's all.
"You mean gate crashing and actually forgetting about your best friend's wedding? Same page, Harold," Niall said.
I almost forgot that they forgot about it. Maybe like me, they'd been too caught up with the fun few days they forgot about everything back in Canada.
"Mate, we're cutting it close. . . just get ready to run once I say so, alright?" Niall said and I nodded, he was leaning towards the front seats, looking hard at the windshield and everything in front of it.
"Taylor just walked in the church," Aerielle said, tense filling her voice.
"What?!"
"Harry, we're getting there," Niall assured though even he was tensed. "Sir, would you please unlock the door here?" He asked. "Harry switch places, please."
"Er, okay," I said and we switched placed. I'm right near the window and I heard the door unlock.
Niall pointed to the church and fudge, there are security guards! My heart started beating too fast when questions started pouring into my head.
What if I'm not allowed to go inside?! What if Taylor deliberately said that?!
But if she did, why would she give me that invitation?!
Does she want me to stop it or not?
I remembered her saying that whatever happens I should know that she still loves me. So, what does that mean for me?! How come I've only asked it now?!
"You have your invitation?" Niall asked.
"Yes!" I showed it to him, it's a bit crumpled and I had to refrain myself from crumpling it up. The thought of her marrying someone blows my mind, I wanted to burn everything that gone through with it. If it were legal, even that Todd Lawyes Herralds.
But I shouldn't distract myself with those thoughts.
"Good," he mumbled. "Sir, right here! Right here!"
"Alright, alright," the taxi driver muttered, bored in tone. Before he even finished pulling up, I took a look at my watch, nine thirty nine. . . I groaned and opened the door, even when the taxi is still running.
"Gotta run!" I yelled and shut the door. I heard the people inside the taxi yelling something but I didn't hear it.
As I was running towards the church front door. My phone rung, it was Cole.
I answered it yet I was still running, "Look, Nick, I haven't got much time, I gotta go, bye."
"What? Oh wait—"
"Sorry," I said and then ended the call. As I walked quickly, I put my phone back inside my pocket.
And then I faced the two buff looking guards. I am not scared that it'll reach a fight, I am terrified that it might make a scene and prevent me from my goal.
"Harry Styles, I've an invitation, can I go in now?" I asked, my heartbeat rising up as I heard the bridal chorus started playing.
Both the guards looked at each other and opened the door. I was stunned for a split second until my watch started ringing as I've set off to alarm.
"Thanks," I said and walked in. Whoa, that was easy.
Shouldn't I wait for speak now or forever hold your peace? That's what they do in the movies.
No freaking way. There was no way I would imitate that. There's no such thing as formality to a desperate time like this.
It was a split second observation but I noticed a load of things. Alright, all I can say was it was really extravagant. Flowers, the cloth, the people, all decorated to match the beautiful lady in white. White was actually more than I could see. Even the carpet in the middle was brilliantly white yet also sparkling with the bits of silver glitter here and there. At the sides, on the seats was a barricade of flowers and silver coloured cloth. The bridal chorus played in the background as all eyes were on Taylor –at the least, Herralds could have picked something other than the bridal chorus, a little originality please!
Kendall was the maid of honour, Berlyn was a bridesmaid, Marshal was a groomsman, right near the end of the aisle whereas I couldn't properly see the groom and the best man.
Taylor was already walking down the aisle, the people had risen from their seats, everything was peaceful until I came in.
Once the door opened, the bridal chorus had stopped as it made a lot of noise. All pair of eyes were on me apart from Taylor's and the groom –whom from a distance is a bit too blurry from my sight. I could see familiar faces but I couldn't focus on them.
I gulped but I swallowed the fear along with it. I've gathered every ounce of confidence in me, hoping I could muster out enough. I've faced life and death, this couldn't be worse. . . but yes, it's much worse.
"Taylor Alison Swift," I called. I walked towards her very slowly as she was already in the middle of the aisle. I blinked a few times as everything was grand, was overly elitist, in fact. . . apart from her.
She was in the middle of attention but the simplest one among it all. She was wearing a simple white dress yet I know embroidered with a lot of swirls as fine detail for the closer look. Unlike all the brides about to be wed I've seen, she was the one with the simplest wedding gown, in fact it's a dress. . . with no veil.
But then I remembered how she never liked making things too formal. I wondered why. It's every woman's dream to have the grandest wedding with the most beautiful wedding gown as long as the aisle. . . but, no. Grandest wedding, I'd give her that, she has that. . . but the wedding gown?! No, she chose something simpler.
There was a collection of gasps as I walked towards her, I faced her as she was holding in a her hands, a bouquet of white flowers.
My heart heated too loudly, my ears are almost blacking out but I forced myself to focus on the scene. . . to focus on her, only her.
She seemed stunned to see me. Her eyes were painted with surprise that I actually came, they are starting to glimmer. She opened her mouth yet she hadn't said a word, and she seemed a bit too shaky.
"You came." she gasped quietly. I couldn't tell whether it was a statement of surprise or horror. I'm not sure whether she had wanted me here or not.
It was a split second of deciding whether I continue with this or not. . . but I have to do it, I have to do what I came here for.
"Don't do it," I said, quite breathless, not because I was tired, more likely because she looked simply beautiful. Her hair was just a bit waved, resting on her shoulders, her make up was as light as ever yet it pushed out the colour of her red lips and her brilliant blue eyes.
"Taylor, don't do it. We're not over yet, you can't do it."
We aren't over. We are never over, there wasn't an ending to go along with it. We didn't go through all of those times just to forget about each other.
"We are never over, we can never be over, Taylor. As long as I'm alive there is no way I'm going to let you do this," I said. I know that loving someone also meant setting them free when they don't want to be with you anymore but I can't just settle for that. I am not going down without a fight to show for it.
I'm a soldier, I've been in too many battles in a lifetime. Guns blazing, missiles flying, bombs dropping, every single one of them, I found myself to come out alive. In this instance, although it wasn't a situation where I could die, it was a situation where I could lose the rest of my life.
And I can't have that.
Taylor was still rendered speechless and so was the crowd. The whole church was silent, all I could hear was my loud heartbeat and tensed breathing.
I am scared. I am terrified way beyond terrified. In the many battles I've been, this one seemed to be the most dangerous for me. Whatever happens, it would scar me for the rest of my life –however long it could be.
She was breathing so sharply, it felt like she had been holding herself back from something. She still haven't said a word and I don't need her to, not yet. She can't decide yet, she won't decide yet not unless I was finished with what I'm saying.
Tears were making their ways to my eyes, and my chest was tightening yet I tried to hold it all back. I blinked everything back and took a deep breath, "Look, I'm eight years too late but please don't tell me I'm twenty five minutes too late."
I can't believe I'm actually making song references at the moment. "Rephrase that," I mumbled.
"It took me a very long time, but I know that I'm not too late," I said firmly. "Please don't you say I'm too late."
"But Harry—"
I held up my hand, "I'm not finished yet." As much as I wanted to hear what she wanted to say, I've got a load of things to get off my chest. "Eight years, Taylor. Eight years and you were the only one, you still are. I still love you, and I might have let all those years pass but I still do."
"Every song, every movie, every line, every memory, all you, Taylor. The things is — I--I can't live without. Not anymore. You don't just come back in my life and be gone just as simply as that!"
I think, eyes weren't the only things on me, also cameras and that caused me to have slight trouble breathing.
"You want me to be honest, right? Here I am, and I am telling you, that maybe I've let those years pass but never once had I forgotten about you. Please, just give me a chance to prove that! I'm sorry for letting it all go to waste, I'm sorry for being caught up planning for the future when really, we never do that! I forgot about how we used to be and I'm sorry."
I sighed, still looking into her eyes that were on the brink of tears. "What I am never going to apologise for is the fact that I've gatecrashed your wedding. I will never be sorry for trying to get you back. So even if these people around us judge me, think less of me, I won't care. All I know is I can't let you go because that'll be the worst mistake of my life."
Without you, I'm just a sad song. . .
"I don't want to be a sad song," I whispered.
There, I am finished with want I to say and all there's left is the queen's decision.
What if she declines? What if she rejects me? The End. . . that's it.
Taylor exhaled, "Oh God." She bit her lip and ran her fingers through her hair. "Oh God, I — I c-can't — oh God," she muttered under her breath, sounding very surprised.
And then she looked right to me, "I can't believe you came." She blinked a few times, "Oh God, you actually---"
The bouquet of flowers she was holding had dropped to the ground beside my foot.
My breathing was tight, but it had gone tighter as I felt her arms around me. All of a sudden, in front of a hundred people in the most tensed moment, Taylor wrapped me tight in her embrace and buried her head against my neck.
I could feel her warm breath, she was tensed, very unleased. Her heartbeat could be felt easily as she was against me.
I couldn't tell whether to feel relieved or feel much more nervous but I tried my best to be calm. Honestly, I've no idea what's going on, and I've no idea what to do after this but whatever goes, I'm trusting my gut.
"Thanks for coming," she whispered. . . still, her tone didn't change. She sounded absolutely heartbroken as she repeated what she said, "Thanks for coming, Harry. . ."