C H A P T E R | SEVENTEEN
SHE DON'T KNOW
𝙹 𝚄 𝙳 𝙰 𝚂 𝙼 𝙴 𝙺 𝙷 𝙸
A SMILE, something that rarely crossed his full pouting lips, was plastered across his handsome butterscotch face as he stared down at her in his arms. When she slept she reminded him of an angel and in fact, he was convinced that she must've been one. God could only create someone so perfect and place them on this earth as an angel. His hand swept across her forehead and there he placed a kiss on the sleeping body before placing her down in her canopy bed.
He stared at her for a few minutes, happy that he had quieted her crying - - Destini couldn't get her to sleep no matter what she had tried. Khloe and Brooklyn were spending the weekend with their grandmother again and Destini decided to keep Kayden home because she wasn't feeling well.
"You're so good with her," he heard behind him after placing another kiss on Kayden's forehead and walking out of the room. He slowly closed the bedroom door and found her standing there watching the whole thing. Destini smiled sweetly as he attempted to avoid showing those emotions he'd tried hard to bury but failed when he smiled back. "I thought it was a cold at first," she said, "But I talked to the doctor and she has an ear infection."
"Kids get them a lot," he said, nodding, "Plus, she's teething," he held up an icy teething ring that he had used to quiet her, "There's no medicine for that but for the ear infection she needs medicine."
"I picked it up while you were putting her to sleep," said Destini as they walked together down the hallway.
"I hate seeing her cry like that," he admitted while watching Destini pick up things around the room that the girls had left in disarray, "Shit kills me."
"You're a good uncle, Judas," Destini said as she bent over to grab a magazine off the floor, "These girls are messy as hell," she shook her head and looked around their bedroom. "I tell them time and time again to clean up after themselves but they're hardheaded and don't listen to a word I say." She rubbed her back, tired from all the cooking, cleaning, bending, scrubbing, and everything else the girls and Carter left her to do.
Destini wasn't one for housekeepers and nannies - - she wanted to raise her own children and keep her own house no matter how much money Carter made. She was taught that a woman should be the queen of her own castle, not some nanny or maid. "I don't know why I'm surprised," she sighed tiredly, "They take after their father. Ugh, my back is killing me."
"Relax yourself," said a calm and humble Judas who placed his hand on her lower back and massaged it for a brief moment. "Hey, let me get that," he helped Destini to a seat and then flashed a light smile again - - he just couldn't help it. "You know how kids are," Judas began to clean up Khloe and Brooklyn's toys, "They wanna do what they wanna do," he said, "I was the same way when I was little - - givin' my moms hell."
"I can't imagine," Destini said laughing as she watched him cleaning up, "You're so quiet, Ju. Now, Carter," she shook her head, "I know that nigga was a handful and a half."
"You're right," he said, "When moms wasn't gettin' on his ass for sneaking some girl in the house at 2 in the mornin' she was tryna keep his ass away from juvi," he licked his lips, "He was always dragging me right there with him too."
"Judas," she said after a long pause, looking at her hands in her lap, "What's going on between you and Carter? I asked him too and he said something weird. It started when you got shot at the basketball court." Judas paused his movements for a moment and then sighed, "He wouldn't tell me anything else about it though. I don't know. It just seems like ya'll are fighting about something."
"Nah," Judas whispered calmly, "Everything's straight."
"Is it?" She grabbed his arm softly and turned his face to hers, "Judas what really happened out there? Why won't he tell me anything? And his headaches - - Judas I'm worried because those migraines are getting worse and worse. He won't go to the doctor and he won't let me bring it up without starting a fight."
"I don't know."
"Judas, you're his brother you know something," Destini sighed, "Judas please tell me what's going on."
"I don't know anything about the migraines other than the fact that he had those since we were kids - - they weren't as frequent or as painful as they are now though. Carti's not gonna go to the doctor - - no one can make him do shit he don't want to, you know that."
"He's such a stubborn, asshole!" She exclaimed angrily and then closed her eyes - - she was angry about a lot of shit surrounding Carter, "He pisses me off so fuckin' much, I swear. If it's not one thing its another, with him."
"As far as me and him go - -," he shrugged, "Carter doesn't like anyone givin' him orders - - he likes to give the orders - - I mean you know that," said Judas. "I wanted to stay behind and get them niggas that shot at him and he wanted me to leave with him. It's not that I don't appreciate him being worried about my safety but it's like - - fuck it."
"No," she grabbed his hands, "Judas maybe Carter doesn't listen to you but I do. I wanna hear your feelings." He hadn't heard words like that before and actually felt like being responsive to them. Maybe it was because it was her; Destini brought out a side of him that he didn't know existed. People had tried to get him to open up all the time but Judas never really budged in an effort to protect himself, "Judas I'm not Carter - - you can talk to me."
"Carter wants me to do his dirty work - - when he wants me to do it." Judas said, "So I don't like it when he tries to flip the script like that's not what I do. I'm his henchman - - his right hand - - I do the dirty work, been doing it since we were little. I know my role and I don't get that shit confused but that's my brother," he licked his lips, "Still, he's demanding as fuck. Carti's way or no way."
Destini couldn't argue with Judas there because she knew everything that he was saying was true, "So he expects me to do what he says and shut up and back there on the court I didn't do that. I challenged him and he ain't used to no shit like that; Carti's used to getting any and everything that he wants, especially from me."
"I think it's good you stood up for yourself, Judas," she said, "You shouldn't be so quiet all the time, you know? That's your brother and he'll always be your brother and he'll always love you no matter what differences ya'll have. But I know," she shook her head, "He is selfish and he makes loving him almost impossible but life without him is the same way - - impossible."
Destini got up from where she sat and left the room, wanting to be alone. The more she thought about it, the sadder it became. It didn't make it any better that both of her girls were gone and Carter was away on business again. All she had was Kayden and her big yet lonely home. She walked into the bedroom and ended up at the mirror staring at her reflection while she held one of Carter's many gold Rolex's in her hands, playing with it. Her manicured fingertips slowly rode over the engraving with Carter's name inside it.
"Do you think he's lying to me this time about this 'business trip'," she saw Judas staring at her in the mirror, "Do you think he's really off with some other woman, Judas?"
"I don't know," Judas said like a broken record, "What does your heart say?" She slowly turned around and looked him in the eyes after that inquiry. She could tell the answer in Judas's eyes but he didn't want to verbalize it. Destini knew deep down that something was going on but she didn't have any proof and she didn't know where to start. Tanya's words were beginning to echo in her mind and the look of knowing that Judas gave her was also beginning to seep into her mind filled with doubts.
"My heart," she whispered as her eyes began to tear and she felt Judas's hand on her cheek, "It just hurts."
● ● ●
She couldn't believe her eyes. Then again, Stoni didn't know why she ever doubted it in the first place because Carter had always done exactly what he said and then some. The place was beautiful, something out of an international travel magazine - - simply exquisite. Her fingers touched priceless stones, expensive fabrics, and irreplaceable porcelains from all over the world. This was the way that she had always imagined life when she was a child going from foster home to foster home - - she imagined being a princess and with Carter that was the way that he treated her.
"Papi I can't believe we're really here," Stoni said as she looked out the window at the beautiful view of Paris. There was a glittering fountain with tranquil water that stood amidst a beautiful Parisian courtyard, green with grass and blooming with flowers and hedges. "I've never seen anything like it before," her eyes began to water at the sight of such beauty and the touch of the man that had brought her there.
Carter's hand touched her shoulder as he smiled, "We made it here just in time too," he said, "Fresh off the plane with ten minutes to spare before your birthday," she closed her eyes as he rubbed her cheek with his warm hand. "Why you crying, baby doll?"
"Because I've never had a real birthday," she sniffed, "I never had anything so nice for my birthday or - - or any day, never. When I was in the group home they never remembered my birthday and when I was in a foster they didn't care either. My own momma didn't even give me a birthday present when I was little." She began to cry more profusely now, "All this - - all this for me," tears fell from her eyes and onto the cotton of her shirt, "It just feels so good." Stoni had never seen so many expensive things in her entire life; she'd never lived this way before Carter came along and changed everything, "I don't deserve any of this."
"What do you mean?" He looked down at her confused and cupped her chin in his hand, "Baby you mean the world to me," said Carter, "You deserve all this and more and I - - I neva' expected to get so wrapped up in it - - in us but - - I don't know, you just make me so happy. It's somethin' about you that I can't help but feel like I need in my life. You make me think about how it would be if things were different if - - ,"
"If you weren't married," she lowered her eyes and felt him wiping away her tears, "Do you really mean those things?"
"Yeah, man. Sometimes I wonder what my life woulda been like if it was you instead of her. Shit like that goes through my mind - - it's not that I don't love her - - she gave me three beautiful girls but," he took a deep breath, "You make shit hard for me. You make shit less black and white - - I've never met a girl," he licked his lips and corrected himself, "A woman, I mean, - - other than my wife who I respected just as much as her. I got feelings for you that I neva' even knew I could have."
"You make it hard for me too. I just want you all to myself - - but still I can't give you up - - I just, I can't."
"So don't."
"You treat me like a princess," she said softly, "No one will ever compare to what you've shown me."
"You are a princess," he whispered and kissed her lips, "My princess." Carter's finger pushed away the crystal clear tears falling from her eyes as his lips hovered over hers. Slowly he worked them to her neck and kissed down it until he reached her shoulder blade. Hugging her closer he kissed the soft skin of her shoulder and his teeth sunk into her flesh softly while his green orbs slowly looked upward and found themselves focusing on the clock behind her. "Ma," he whispered into her ear and bit her earlobe, "Guess what?"
"What?" She replied breathlessly, intoxicated by him.
"It's midnight," Carter said, "It's your birthday, baby," he smiled and kissed her neck again, "Happy birthday. I'm glad this time, you spent it with me." He paused and held her body to his, "And you know what - - I wanna spend every one after it with you. Let's not make tonight the only night."
"Forever, Papi," she whispered, "For always."
In that moment she felt it - - all the inhibitions out the door along with all the warnings from Allison that she shouldn't take things with Carter to the next level. Suddenly she realized that she couldn't listen to other people in her ear forever or be held back by the fear that she sometimes felt because of the fact that he was married. It seemed that the more time he spent with her, the more he thought about leaving his wife - - those were the hints that Carter gave her. She wanted to believe him and all she wanted to do was be with him; she was in love with him, point blank.
There was no more holding back, no more being able to control what he made her feel inside. She knew that it was now or never and unsurprisingly she chose to live in the now because she never knew what could come of things between them. She was his woman - - even if she wasn't his wife and on this night she was finally going to make love to him.
She was completely frozen as she stood there near the bed, not knowing what to do around him in this situation. She wasn't a virgin but she hadn't experienced much and she'd only experienced that with one person less than a handful of times - - Carlito. Stoni's fingers trembled as she reached for the clasp of her bra behind her - - she had striped down to her undergarments and now there was nothing but the thin barrier of lace and satin separating her flesh from his.
"I'm so nervous," she whispered, "I'm sorry."
"Don't be," he smiled casually and wrapped his arms around her waist, "Let me help you," said Carter as he reached behind her and unclasped her bra for her. He moved her long straightened tresses from her back and slid the straps from her shoulders until one strap hung on his finger. It dangled and dropped to the floor and he leaned his neck down to place a trail of kisses down her neck, "There's nothin' to be nervous about baby - - I don't wanna ever hurt you," slowly, she nodded.
"Tell me what to do," Stoni said as he slowly laid her down on the imported silk sheets of their Parisian paradise, "Tell me what you want me to do."
His fingers lightly pressed against her shoulder and she fell backward as if she were falling into a pile of feathers. "Nothin'," said Carter as he climbed atop of her with nothing but his boxer briefs on, "I just want you," his deep voice cooed into her ear as his hand slid down between her legs, "To..." he continued, "...Lay there."
She didn't argue with him because she knew that Carter knew best, "Okay," Stoni breathed softly and bit her bottom lip as she felt his hand nearing her arousal.
His tongue slowly swirled its way from her neck to her chest and caught one of her nipples while his hand massaged her center through her lace panties. She moaned softly as he massaged her and simultaneously suckled her hardened nipples like an anatomy expert. He didn't spare her the lashing as his tongue glided between her breasts and down her stomach slowly, leaving a glistening trail above her bellybutton. He dipped his tongue inside and then propped himself up on his elbows and licked his lips, prepared for his meal.
"What are you about to do?"
"What I've been wantin' to do," he spoke, "Taste you," her eyes widened as she felt Carter tugging at her panties with his teeth. "Ma I don't do this shit for everybody," and he didn't - - the only other woman that he would ever go down on was his wife, so that put Stoni in high esteem in Carter's eyes. "This is somethin' real special I wanna do for you," he extended her leg as he pulled off her panties and sat them down.
"Special?" She whispered and watched him as she lay there in the nude with her pedicure on his chiseled abs, "For me?" Stoni watched Carter with wide eyes as he grabbed her ankle and kissed his way from there up to her inner thighs. Stoni focused on Carter's long pink tongue as it slid up her inner thigh; he stopped and placed a kiss midway there while his green eyes stared into hers. "Mmmm, Papito you just keep surprising me. I'm gonna have to - -, OH MY GOD."
Carter didn't have time to waste with words, he brought himself very close to her center and immediately made his tongue comfortable. He attacked her pink wetness with his tongue, pushing the folds back with his fingers and his tongue. Carter tilted his head and slipped his tongue inside the warmth and wetness as she squirmed above him, "Mmmm," he groaned and slid his tongue inside deeper, "Mmmm."
"Papppiiiiii," she whined and shut her eyes tight, her squeal feeding his need to please her even more than it had before. "Papi what are you doing to meee," she whined as Carter's tongue sliced its way from her love tunnel up to her clit.
"You like it, ma?" He said, "Stop tryna run away from me," Carter said, "Spread your legs and let me in," he helped her along as her legs trembled. Pulling her legs apart, Carter placed a trail of kisses down her pelvic bone and focused his attention back on her clit, "Just as good as I thought it would be." Carter teased her moistened bud with his tongue slowly at first, circling his tongue on her clit while his finger pushed her folds open a little more and slowly slid inside. "I gotta get you ready for me," he certainly did because he knew when it was time for the real thing she'd need a prayer - - or two to be able to handle his size.
"Mmm, it feels so good," she said as she bit her bottom lip and couldn't resist touching herself while his tongue examined her clit.
She squeezed her breasts in her hands while propping herself up on her elbows to watch Carter at work. Stoni had a front row view of him as he positioned himself at a tilted angle in front of her kneeling just slightly. Her eyes took in the contours of the muscles in his back and the beautiful curly mane atop of his head, while he knelt down to his prime attraction - - her love.
Stoni reached her hand down and ran her fingers through his hair while Carter suctioned his mouth around her clit and began to suck it slowly, softly while sliding his finger inside her at the same time. He cupped his other hand underneath her thigh and her backside and squeezed every here and there when he put his face in it closer and needed to hold onto her for more leverage.
Throwing her head back when he began to suck harder, she let out another moan that she had been trying to stifle and cupped the back of his head in her hand. Carter looked up at her as she lay there, head back with her mouth wide opened and lips curved into a shape of pleasure but he didn't take his mouth off of her. Instead, he sucked harder, enjoying the sweet nectar that dripped from her and went in for another finger.
When she felt him entering the second finger and his teeth pulling gently at her clit she froze. She was riding the first wave of an orgasm, which made her arch her back involuntarily and scream out his name to the ceiling as she felt pins and needles all over her body.
He was a glutton for her and the way her speech was accented even more when it felt good to her - - especially when she came. Carter wasn't satisfied with this though - - he didn't stop. He continued to suck her of all the juices she had down there for him, nodding his head in a back and forth motion and literally burying his face in it. In place of his two fingers he slid in his tongue as deep as he could go and ignored the shaking legs on either side of him and the fact that she was cuming steadily. He wanted more of her - - he had to have it.
"Carter!" She screamed as he worked his tongue deeper inside her - - heaven knows how he did it, how he got it so deep. "Carter, I'm about to cum again," she whimpered, still not being able to recover from the first one she'd just had.
Stoni couldn't take him going deeper and deeper, sucking and licking every little crevice that he could find without spilling the contents of her love, "Oooooh Carterrrr," she moaned again and shut her eyes closed while grabbing her breasts tightly in her hands. Stoni collapsed and was no longer able to keep herself propped up on her elbows while she came a second time. Like a fiend, he licked up every single drop and placed a sweet kiss on the lips of her pussy while she lay there unable to do anything further.
"Don't get too comfortable," Carter said, coming up for air as he climbed up from her waist like a hunting animal with his eyes set on his prey, "We ain't done yet baby doll." Stoni's eyes were still closed and her legs were still shaking, "Don't tell me you're tired already," he laughed, "I thought I was the older one." It wasn't that - - it was the fact that he'd just ate her pussy like no other in this world - - like his damn life depended on it. "Well you betta' get up," he pushed open her thighs and rested himself between after discarding his last article of clothing, "You wanna feel me don't you?"
"Yes," she opened her eyes and nodded. Then she pulled him down to her by his neck and kissed his lips, tasting herself, "I wanna feel you."
"Where you wanna feel me?" He kissed her neck, "Hmmm?"
"Inside," she moaned and hugged him closer while spreading her legs for him.
"You ain't gon run are you?" He laughed, rummaging with something between her thighs and his, "I'm tellin' you baby doll - - you gettin' yourself into somethin' serious right now." Even Destini couldn't handle him at times and she'd had it countless times - - when it came to the dick department the man was simply blessed. He scooped her up in his arms, holding her naked body to his and cleared the edge of the bed and stood up to his feet.
"Where we going Papi?" She held on tight and a few moments later she felt the draft on both their bodies from being so close to the window.
"You said you like the view right," he said as she turned and looked at lovely Paris, "I wanted you to see it while I'm up in it," Carter smirked and grabbed his manhood in his hand, "Watch that," he said as she looked over the city. He was attempting to take her mind off of the slight pain he knew she was about to feel. Carter slowly entered, inch by inch into her tight wetness. He felt her gripping his shoulders, digging her fingernails into them, "Come on baby," said Carter when he saw her eyes tearing up a little.
"It's too biggg," she whined and took a deep breath, "I can'ttt," said Stoni, "Papito I can't do it."
"Mhm," he sucked her neck, "You can do it - - you gotta just relax, though, ma." He kissed her ear and eased himself in a little more, "There you go - - relax," she mumbled curses under her breath but she didn't give up, "Damn baby - - you so fuckin' tight you feel mad good."
She wrapped her arms around him tightly and buried her face in his neck to avoid the tears welling in her eyes from being seen. He eased himself in a little more and slid his hand between her legs while she sat up on the island that he'd sat her on and rubbed her clit with his thumb in slow circles while sliding the rest of himself inside. She let out a deep breath when he was inside and slowly picked up her head to look him in the eyes. "Come hea'," he said to her and kissed her lips passionately, "I'm gon make all the pain go away," Carter said, "I promise you that."
"Make it go away," she said as he wiped her tear, "I trust you with my life. Make it go."
He pushed back a little and pinned her hips down to the counter as he slowly stroked backward and then slowly came forward. She was still dripping wet and her nipples were erect against his chest every time he came forward and touched her chest with his. It didn't take long for the tears to fade before she was feeling pleasure on top of pleasure from his serious stroke work. His hand crept up her spine as he went slow and deep and found the nape of her neck where he grabbed. Carter moved his hips at a slow steady pace but when he went in he went deeply so that she could feel all of him.
"Ayi dios mio," she moaned as he went deeper and deeper each time and felt no more pain. It was only the initial entering that hurt the most because she wasn't used to someone of HIS size. "Damelo, ayi - - ayi - - si Papi, damelo." Carter sucked the side of her neck forming a purple hickie as he went deeper and maintained a good grip on the nape of her neck while she was atop the island.
"Let that shit out, ma," he groaned and started to increase his pace, "Scream as loud as you want - - all this is yours," she bit his shoulder as he went faster and her breasts followed with the motions, moving as he thrust himself deep inside her. Carter pulled back a little and let her neck go. He pushed her back a little and she propped herself up on her elbows while Carter grabbed her legs and put them on his shoulders. He had warmed her up enough and knew she was ready for him to stop teasing.
"Sssssss," she hissed as he squeezed her legs as they were on his shoulders and began pushing himself in at a much faster pace than before.
His strokes came at her like rapid fire this time around causing her to bite down on her bottom lip for dear life. She gave up trying to prop herself up again and laid down completely on the cool marble of the island while Carter plowed himself inside her. He spread her legs and let them hang off the island so he could see her face and pulled her closer to him by her backside. Carter palmed her globes in his hands and pushed and pulled Stoni back and forth on him quickly while she quit trying to formulate words and screamed in pleasure.
"This my pussy, baby doll?" He said and kept at his pace.
"Yesssss Papito, yesssss!"
"Yes what?" He smirked as she tried to speak coherently, "Yes - -," he thrusted hard, "What?"
"Yes it's your pussy Carter - - oh fuck," she didn't even care to edit herself anymore because she couldn't control it and he'd let her slide, "I'm about to cum again - -," she breathed hard and slid her hand down between her legs, touching her clit as Carter rammed himself inside her making her whole body jerk, "It's so good - - se siente tan bien - - so so so good!"
"Cum for me then," said Carter, "So I can lick that shit up - - again." He thrusted hard and made her body jerk again, "I know you got that sweet shit for me - - don't be stingy with daddy."
"I won't - - I won't - - fuccccck I'm cumin' againnnnnn," what she said was definitely news to his ears because in less than ten seconds flat he was bent down licking up the fruits of his labor, "I can't breathe," she grabbed her chest as Carter devoured her pussy with his hurricane tongue, "Ooooooh...ssss..." she said as his tongue slipped inside her again. When he had licked it all up Carter was back up on his feet and picked her up to put her back on the bed.
"On your stomach this time, love," said Carter, "I'm just gettin' started - - baby you gonna get plenty exercise tonight."
● ● ●
Morning came too soon, peeking in the windows that they'd forgotten to close as they both slept peacefully in their nakedness. Carter was holding Stoni and Stoni was laying on his chest with her hand intertwined with his. She was the first to open her eyes to the sun as it invaded their bedroom and felt like a queen opening her eyes to a beautiful fairytale; no birthday would ever top waking up and feeling how she felt. Slowly she turned to him and kissed his lips while he slept and traced his tattoos with her fingernail.
Stoni slipped out of bed after a while and stood in the nude looking at the beautiful view that she was obsessed with now. She'd fell asleep to it and had made love to it and it still didn't seem real yet. She was still trying to convince herself that this wasn't a dream - - this was real. She was so deep in thought that she didn't even feel Carter come behind her and pull her naked body into his. He reached his arms around and grabbed her breasts in his large hands and held them while kissing down her neck to say good morning.
"Up early birthday girl," said Carter as he held her close, "You tryna leave me in bed all alone and shit."
"I didn't think you'd notice," she said as she turned around and stood up on her tip toes to kiss his lips, "Mmmmmm," she moaned.
"I got something for you," Carter said and pulled her back to the bed. He plopped down and reached for something under his pillow and then she plopped down with him, "Close your eyes." She closed them and while she did he draped a priceless Harry Winston sapphire necklace around her neck, "Happy birthday."
Stoni touched her neck and gasped when she felt the big stone and looked at the glittering sapphire that couldn't have belonged to her, "Papi - - you, oh my God." She squealed and tackled him on the bed and proceeded to kiss all over his face, "It's beautiful, Carter!"
"You're beautiful," he said coolly reaching up to touch her face as she straddled him, "Anything for my baby doll."
"I don't deserve thisss," she wrapped her arms around him tight, "You're too good to me."
"Quit sayin' that shit," he said as she laid down on his chest, "Somethin' you said last night - - made me think, baby doll."
"Really?" He played in her hair as she lay there, "What?"
"About how you grew up and shit," Carter licked his lips, "I finally figured out why I'm so drawn to you."
"Why?"
"Cause we're so similar," she reached up and held his hand as he talked, "I'm gonna tell you a secret okay? Somethin' that I don't ever really talk about."
"A secret?" Her eyes widened and she looked up and sat up, "Okay, I'm all ears," Stoni said smiling.
"I used to be just like you, Stoni," Carter looked into her eyes, confessing something that only a select few people really knew about him, "I used to be a foster kid. From the moment I was born up until I was about fourteen I was a ward of the state - - in a group home. I never knew my parents - - my real parents."
"Huh?" She was confused, "But Judas - - he's your brother and you both have the same last name, how could - -,"
"He's my foster brother. His mother and father adopted me when I was fourteen. It was my decision then to get my last name changed, I didn't want to be remembered by it - - my original last name, I was so embarrassed about where I came from." She could tell that it was hard for Carter to talk about by the seriousness in his voice and the way his eyes looked, "I don't even know my real mother or father. They didn't want me."
"Oh, Papito," she cradled his face in her hands, "I didn't know - - I had no idea."
"So I know how it is growing up with nobody and shit, you know," he said, "I think that's why God put us together. I think that's why that night when I met you - - I just...I saw somethin' in you ma, something that said you needed me just as much as I needed you too. People don't really understand how it feels - - that void you feel inside...that feeling of not knowing."
"I know exactly what you mean," she whispered back, "I feel like that all the time."
"Me too," he whispered back and closed his eyes, "When I was a kid I wanted to find them but I gave up. Luckily, I had Judas's family and Midknight - - he was like a mentor to me too - - he's the reason I am where I am today. Taught me everything I know and encouraged me to go to school and better myself plus he helped me get my money up," said Carter, "But all that doesn't replace biological family."
"Well," she kissed his lips, "Papi you're my family and I love you."
He smiled and kissed her, "You're my family too, baby doll," he said, "I love you too." Carter sat up and licked his lips, "Aight, enough of the sentimental shit," he said shaking it off, "We got a big day - - a big week ahead of us."
"We do?"
"Yeah shorty," he smiled, "It's Paris! France - -, baby we ain't gon spend it all in the suite," Carter got up from the bed, "We're goin' shopping and shit - - see a few fashion shows - - oh, I'm feeling like some new furs today, what you think?"
"Furs?"
"Yeah - - you know fur coats - - hats shit like that," he laughed and stroked her hair, "You like fur coats?"
"I've never even had one," she said as she watched Carter go into the bathroom to start the shower. She felt something vibrating in the covers and looked around until she found it - - Carter's phone. On the screen she saw Destini's name and she held it in her hand staring at it wordlessly.
"Baby doll!" Carter called from the bathroom.
"Y-Y-Yes," she stammered a little, "Yes, Papi?"
"Come get in the shower with me." Stoni swallowed the lump in her throat and felt chills run down her spine - - seeing his wife's name alone was enough to put fear and guilt in her heart. Yet at the same time she couldn't give him up. Yes, he was hers first but Carter was also Stoni's now and though it wasn't the best situation it was what it was.
"Coming," she said as she dropped the phone and walked into the bathroom with Carter. It was too late to turn back now.
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