Apology in advance: I am sorry if you find this somewhat offensive.
I don't own anything.
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Chirrut Îmwe > derp_eyes
Chirrut Îmwe: DERP it is History Lesson time
derp_eyes: ...
Chirrut Îmwe: Today we were learn about the Ten Chirrandments
derp_eyes: Really Chirrut?
Chirrut Îmwe: Yes
derp_eyes: But what if we offend someone?
Chirrut Îmwe: If they were already offended by my "Do not use the Force's name in vain" they shouldn't be here
Chirrut Îmwe: Plus you have probably offended everyone at some point in this book
derp_eyes: tru
derp_eyes: Can I have Orson join me in the history lesson?
Chirrut Îmwe: No
[derp_eyes has added Orson Krennic and the rest of the Rogue 1 crew to the chat because she is the author and she does not care what Chirrut says]
Chirrut Îmwe: 😑
Baze Malbus: The 10 Chirrandments?
Cassian Andor: Oh boy
Bodhi Rook: History lesson? NUUU I HATE HISTORY
Orson Krennic: This ought to be interesting.
K-2SO: NUUU I HATE SCHOOL
Jyn Erso: Uh oh. Chirrut's eyes are glazed over and they look all spirituy
Chirrut Îmwe: NUMBER 1: You shall praise no other forces besides the Force
Orson Krennic: What about Gravity?
Jyn Erso: Or inertia?
Bodhi Rook: How about velocity?
K-2SO: Or the forces of nature?
Chirrut Îmwe: This is why I didn't want you to add more people derp
derp_eyes: What's the next one?
Chirrut Îmwe: NUMBER 2: Do not make a Tower of Babel
Orson Krennic: We shall make a Death Star instead. It will be better than the Tower of Babel
Jyn Erso: AND I WILL STEAL THE DEATH STAR PLANS
Cassian Andor: Me too!
K-2SO: Me too!
Bodhi Rook: I will die an undramatic death
Baze Malbus: TOO SOON
Chirrut Îmwe: NUMBER 3: Do not use the Force's name in vain
K-2SO: Duh
Orson Krennic: FORCE FORCE FORCE FORCE FORCE!!!
Bodhi Rook: Krennic ru serious
Orson Krennic: I AM TRYING TO USE THE FORCE'S NAME IN VAIN AND SEE IF THE FORCE ACTUALLY EXISTS!!!
derp_eyes: You were chocked by Vader. Isn't that enough proof?
Chirrut Îmwe: You are also going to me Satan one day
K-2SO: The Devil and Orson: Amigos with a Death Star.
Baze Malbus: What's next?
Chirrut Îmwe: NUMBER 4: Sundays are days for making out with your lover, not doing work.
Cassian Andor: I make out with Jyn every day
K-2SO: You also make out with your teletubby everyday
Jyn Erso: WHAT THE ACTUAL DEATH STAR
Orson Krennic: Do not use the Death Star's name in vain!
Orson Krennic: Kidding. XP
derp_eyes: Orson Krennic is catching on to my X(something) faces!
Orson Krennic: Oh yeah, derp, what's x when x² + 2x = 3
derp_eyes: Dammit Orson
Chirrut Îmwe: NUMBER 5: Respect your elders
Orson Krennic: HAHA DERP!!
Chirrut Îmwe: NUMBER 6: Don't Kill
Cassian Andor: Too late
Jyn Erso: I lost count of how many I killed
K-2SO: I killed a bunch of stormtroopers and nearly killed Cassian once when I was not his best buddy
Baze Malbus: I'm in the high 600s
Bodhi Rook: I shot someone once. It was terrifying
Orson Krennic: I've killed. A lot.
derp_eyes: Do zombies on video games count?
Chirrut Îmwe: No
Chirrut Îmwe: NUMBER 7: Don't commit adultery
Cassian Andor: I've sinned
Jyn Erso: Me too
Orson Krennic: Same
K-2SO: YAY!! I pass this law!
Baze Malbus: Me too!
Bodhi Rook: Me three!
derp_eyes: me four!
Jyn Erso: How are u guys clear?
Bodhi Rook: I've only done it with Cassian
derp_eyes: I'm a teen. I don't even have a date
Baze Malbus: I'm still a virgin
K-2SO: I'm a droid
K-2SO: WTBANTHA BAZE HOW EVEN UR 53 AND UR STILL A VIRGIN
Chirrut Îmwe: NUMBER 8: Don't steal
Jyn Erso: Too late
Orson Krennic: I think I go against every one of these rules.
derp_eyes: I stole dog biscuits
Baze Malbus: I'm clear!
K-2SO: Not me
Cassian Andor: I stole Death Star plans
Bodhi Rook: You also stole my heart
Cassian Andor: Oh. Let me give that back
Bodhi Rook: 😡😡😡 AARRRUUGGHH!!! MEN!!
K-2SO: Ur a man
Bodhi Rook: DONT TALK TO ME
Chirrut Îmwe: NUMBER 9: Don't wrongly accuse someone
Orson Krennic: Yet again, I failed.
Jyn Erso: Same
Cassian Andor: I haven't
K-2SO: I only accuse Jyn of everything
derp_eyes: I fail
Baze Malbus: I don't
Bodhi Rook: THIS IS ALL JYN'S FAULT THAT PILOT² CANT HAPPEN
Chirrut Îmwe: NUMBER 10: Don't envy someone because they have something you don't
Baze Malbus: So I can't envy derp because she has living parents?
Chirrut Îmwe: That is correct
derp_eyes: Oh yeah... none of you have living parents, don't you?
Orson Krennic: Yes.
Bodhi Rook: Yeah
Cassian Andor: Yep
Jyn Erso: MAMA!! PAPA!!
Baze Malbus: Yerp
K-2SO: I never had parents
Chirrut Îmwe: You guys are the worst. You must learn to uncorrupt yourself and become one with the 10 Chirrandments.
Orson Krennic: Actually I'm with the 7 Deadly Sins.
Orson Krennic: Greed, Gluttony, Pride, Wrath, Lust, Evny, Sloth.
derp_eyes: MELIODIS!!
Orson Krennic: You watch too much anime.
Cassian Andor: I'm leaning towards the 7 sins
Jyn Erso: Me too
K-2SO: Same
Bodhi Rook: PILOT²!!!!
Baze Malbus: I will become loyal to the 10 Chirrandments!
Chirrut Îmwe: :D
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Yep. That's what came out of my fingers at midnight.
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