(A/N- So I'm thinking that this story will likely only have a couple more chapters. Not exactly sure, but I think I have written all that I have wanted and taken this story as far as I want. I'll have a definite answer for you all by the next update, which will be on Thursday! I hope you all enjoy!! xx )
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After a few hours of being together emotionally and physically, we both lay curled up in my bed, tightly holding on to one another; scared to let go. We knew this was a starting over point but I was worried that maybe he would change his mind and by the way he was gripping me, he likely was thinking the same thing.
The sex was as amazing as it always was. Harry and I never had a problem with the physical aspect of our relationship and that fact was just proven. We have to work on not taking the other for granted, fighting for the relationship and honesty and I am willing to do all of that with him, for him.
Harry is currently lying with his head on my chest, right leg hooked over my legs. I am holding him tight around his shoulder with my lips pressed to the top of his head. He loosens his grip slightly on my side and begins grazing his right hand up and down my chest. He takes a deep breath and presses his lips to my skin.
“I love you, Niall.” He whispers. I smile and take his right hand in my left and hold it in place on my chest, just over my heart.
“I love you, too.” I felt the cold of metal on my skin and traced my fingers over the object causing the shivers. A ring on his right fourth finger. More specifically, my old ring. The ring that he has never once taken off, even through all of the pain, separation and heart break. The ring remained a constant for him. Suddenly it became clear that he always knew that we would be back here. He knew that we would get back to us. He held onto hope and the ring.
I ran my fingers over the knots that made the ring, remembering the feeling of it when it used to sit on my middle finger. I remember the night that I gave it to him. I remember the feeling of always wanting to be with Harry and now feeling thankful that he never lost hope and here we are, finally back in each other’s arms. I knew what I had to do in this moment. I knew what I wanted to do.
I let go of his right hand and reached over to my bed side table, opening the drawer. I felt his head tilt slightly, likely looking at what I was currently doing. I grabbed the black velvet box and pulled it from the drawer. I began to adjust my body so that I would be able to sit up. He moved with me. We were now resting against the headboard.
He sat up a little bit and was watching as I set the box in my lap and lifted the top off of it. I removed the necklace from it; my guitar pick necklace which was a gift from Harry all those years ago. I looked at him with love in my eyes and held his gaze as I placed the necklace around my neck, returning it to its proper place.
His eyes glossed over as he leaned in and placed his lips on mine. I held onto him tight and kissed him with all the love that I had in me. I could feel my love for him growing with each second that passed and I longed for the day that the love I feel for him will be as deeply as it once was and possibly even more.
We then shifted slightly so that I was now lying against his chest.
“I’m so happy that you came back to me, baby. I’m glad you decided to give us another chance. I love you so much, Ni and I just can’t picture my life without you. I want this, I want us, forever.”
“I’m sorry it took me so long and I’ll be eternally grateful and thankful that you never gave up, like me…” my voice trailed off as I started to feel badly.
“Hey” he said and lifted my face up to meet his. “You did what you had to do. I know that. I know what I did to you and you had every right to leave me. You were right, Niall. As hard as this past year and a half has been, I know it was what we needed. Now we can move on and be better than we were. I know that I’ve learned from my mistakes and I’ll be sure to never mess up like that again. I know the agony of losing you and I don’t ever want to go through that again. I love you and I’ll be better this time. We’ll be better.” He kissed my forehead gently and ran his fingers across my cheek. I leaned into his touch and held his hand.
“I love you, Harry.” I looked deeply into his eyes and felt the pull and desire in him and in my own body. I moved my position and straddled his lap. We were both still undressed from the activities of just an hour ago.
I sat on his lap with my backside feeling his member slowly getting aroused. My own growing larger against my stomach with every passing moment. Our breathing began to quicken as my hands traveled up and down his chest. He lifted his left hand from my hip and took hold of my necklace and pulled me closer to him. Our faces now just inches from one another. A small forward movement from me and our lips molded together.
I rolled my hips against him, causing a moan to slip from both of our mouths and in that moment we began to express our love for each other once more.
The days passed quickly. I was busy planning for the new album so I had little time to do anything else. I hadn’t seen Harry since he left Wednesday morning. We’ve texted a couple times but I thought it was best to have a few days of distance. I knew we had much history but I was still sort of considering us as just starting out and two people who aren’t exclusive and working towards a relationship don’t spend every day together. They have a few days break in between each date or visit.
We were all going out tonight so I would see him when I arrived at the bar; another decision I made. We would go separately.
To: Niall
So it’s on the E! News channel right now in America that we have split.
I read over Ryan’s text message a couple times before responding. I know that my management called some press this morning and so did his management but he is in America, on the west coast more specifically meaning he is about eight hours ahead of me, so of course it would be out over there. I’m sure it will be on the entertainment news channel here tonight. I’m really not looking forward to watching it, if I’m being honest. Ryan and I knew what happened and I’m sure whatever story they are going to spin will be less than accurate. The thought of the split, however logical and right for the both of us, is still painful to think about. It’s still very new for me.
To: Ryan
Really? So what are they saying?
To: Niall
Actually, not much. Just that we’ve ended our relationship and they were told it was an equal decision and that we are still friends. They speculate that it was because I’ll be over here for a while and we decided that long distance wasn’t for us.
To: Ryan
Well that’s good, I guess. At least there aren’t reports of infidelity! : )
To: Niall
Well the gossip magazines have yet to print anything about it yet, so I’m sure in a day or so according to a “source”, I’ll have cheated on you with your brother but not before getting some model pregnant.
To: Ryan
Well as long as you name the baby after me, I guess I’m alright with that. But my brother?! Really!! ;) I miss you. I hope you are having a great time!
To: Niall
;) I miss you, too! And yes, I’m having a lot of fun! I hope you are doing good!
To: Ryan
Yeah. I’m good. Getting better every day! Going out with the lads tonight. Should be fun! But I guess I’ll talk to you later. Have a great evening, Ry.
To: Niall
That’s really great! Have fun and be safe tonight and yeah, we’ll catch up soon. Have a good day, Ni.
I responded with a smiley face and set my phone back on the stand in my room. It’s oddly weird knowing that we aren’t dating and I have to make the effort not to call him ‘babe’ or ‘baby’. I’m sure I’ll stop having the urge to do that after a while.
I still have about ten hours to kill of the day before I have to meet the boys out at the bar so my plan is actually to do nothing and I think I’ll start by doing nothing on my couch with the television on.
“Niall! You’re here!” Louis exclaims as I walk up to the roped off section that we will be for the evening. I step over the rope, not really waiting for the bouncer to open it for me and I am immediately wrapped up in Louis’ arms and he is placing a very slobbery kiss on my temple.
“Ugh, Louis.” I smirk and wipe the kiss away. I glance around but before I can say anything Louis is already answering the question that has yet to leave my lips.
“He’s not here yet.” He smiles brightly.
“Ok” My reply was simple but it was written all over my face that I wanted to see him. It’s been a long three days and I was desperate for his touch.
The waitress brought over a few beers and I grabbed my first one, all the while saying hello to Liam and Zayn and the fifteen or so other people, some of whom I didn’t know, that managed their way into our roped off section.
“So you’re finally back together?” Louis quirks an eyebrow at me and smiles a hopeful smile.
“No. We are taking it slow. I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before we are, but we have a few issues to work on first.”
“I guess I get that. But seriously, Ni, I’m really happy. You two really are perfect for each other.”
“Thanks, Lou” I say with a smile and wrap my arms around his neck and hold him. I am thankful to Louis for always sticking by Harry and me during the separation. He could have easily ignored me but I’m grateful that he didn’t.
“Back off Lou. He’s mine” I heard the words flow from the person right behind me. I immediately knew that voice and the low calm and sexy tone of it sent chills up mine spine. I felt his strong arm wrap around my waist from behind and he pulled on me lightly, effectively separating me from Louis.
“I thought we could share. I know Niall would be ok with that. Wouldn’t ya, babe?” Lou smirked, earning a laugh from me.
“Too bad, I’m selfish. That’s not gonna happen.” He spoke and tilted his head down and brushed his lips over the side of my neck. I closed my eyes and leaned into his touch. I brought one of my hands over to his hand that was around my waist and my other hand ran softly over his cheek. I could hear someone, likely Louis, say something along the lines of Harry and I needing to get a room but I ignored it and reveled in the feeling of being in Harry’s arms.
“I missed you, babe.” His hot breath rolling off of his lips as he spoke.
“I missed you, too.” I replied and then slowly began to turn in his arms so that I could see his face.
“You look amazing, Ni.” He murmured, looking deeply into my eyes as the pad of his left thumb grazed over my bottom lip. The tension, being of a sexual nature, between us was palpable and I couldn’t help but to let a small moan slip from my lips.
I rested my forehead on his and skimmed my fingertips along the top of his jeans, leaving goose bumps in their wake. He swallowed hard and I tucked my head into the crook of his neck and began leaving barely there kisses, ghosting my lips across his sensitive skin. I hooked the tops of my fingers into the top of his jeans and pulled his body closer to mine. Our mid-sections now tightly pressed against one another. Our breathing became heavy and rapid. I knew we needed to calm slightly but I didn’t want to stop.
A second later I felt his hands grab onto mine and pull them from the top of his pants. He looked into my eyes and smirked as I pouted.
“C’mon” He whispered and tugged on my arm and I obediently followed without question.
We approached a set of stairs and I immediately thought about not realizing that there was a second level to this place. I’ve only ever been here a few times and each time only for a little while. I’m obviously not as observant as I think I am.
There was a big and burly guard in front of the darkened staircase and I assumed that we weren’t allowed. I looked up to Harry to see him eye the guard and he nodded in understanding and stepped aside.
We ascended the stairs and once at the top we took a left; that being the only way we could go. To the right was a railing that overlooked the floor downstairs.
I looked around as Harry led us to wherever, and surveyed the surroundings. The area up here was only about fifteen feet long. Again, to the right was just a railing and to the left was a somewhat narrow walkway that led to a door.
“What are we doing? That’s the office” I stated just as he took hold of the door in front of us. Harry smirked and placed a chaste kiss on my lips.
“I know the owner. It’s fine.” He turned the knob and we walked inside. The music blaring from outside became only muffled sounds as soon as he shut the door behind us. He turned on the lights in the room and it was indeed an office. A small, yet seemingly functional room with a desk, a few chairs, filing cabinets, a fake potted plant in the corner and of course a couch along the far wall.
“Harry” I spoke in a hushed tone but was cut off with his lips on mine. I was walked back and soon felt the wall behind me. My body was being pressed tightly into it as Harry’s lips pressed further into mine.
Like always, and this time proved no different, our kiss was deepened only moments after starting. His lips were addictive and I couldn’t get enough of him.
His hands ran down my body and stopped just below my bottom. I felt a slight tug and I immediately followed along with the obvious sign of what he wanted. I jumped slightly for him to be able to lift my body off the ground. He gripped my backside with a squeeze, causing me to moan and tighten my legs firmly around his waist.
The fire between us was evident in our kissing, the passion evident in the way we held tightly to one another and lust was clearly slipping from our mouths in the form of heavy breathing filled moans.
Yet my mind was somewhere else. As good as this felt, and it felt amazing, I knew it had to stop. We had to stop. It wasn’t the fact that we weren’t officially dating. It wasn’t the location in which we were. It wasn’t the fact that I didn’t want to have sex on a dingy old couch in some office belonging to someone whom I’ve never met.
The reason this needed to stop was because I don’t want our lust filled passion to take precedence in this relationship. Our sexual want, need and longing for one another were never the problems in our relationship. We certainly didn’t have to work on being better together in the physical aspect. I didn’t want this time around to be nothing but physical.
Knowing that I have to tell Harry this, my hands, which were currently gripping tight onto the hair on the back of his head, began to pull his lips from mine. He then looked into my eyes, his pupils very much blow wide caused by want, and dipped back in, only this time his lips took my neck and claimed it as his. Kisses, licks, bites, all very enticing and going directly to my erection pressing tightly against his.
“Harry” I tried to say firmly but it came out as more of a moan.
“God, baby. I love it when you moan my name.” He growled and pushed his arousal harder into mine. I couldn’t help but buck up into him and moan at the feeling.
“No. Harry….we need to …… need to st…..stop.” I pulled his face from the crook of my neck and looked in his eyes once more. I tried to calm and level my breathing so that he would be able to see that I was serious. I caressed his cheek in a soothing manner and allowed for him to calm down himself. I waited for him and when I could feel his fingers loosen their grip on the back of my legs, I knew he was coming down to my level.
My feet soon touched the floor and his forehead rested against the wall right next to where the back of my head rested. He was holding tight to my hips while my hands rested lightly on the front of his chest. My hands rose with every breath he took. I gently pushed his body from his current stance so that I would be able to look him in the eyes.
“Can we sit down?” I asked softly, placing a kiss just to the left of his lips. He responded wordlessly with a nod and the led me to the couch. The music from the club downstairs, having been completely silenced by the over-taking lust in my mind, was now coming back into my ears as muffled melodies.
“What’s the matter, Ni?” He asks as he takes my hands in his and we both sit face to face on the sofa.
“It’s just that I don’t want this to become all about sex with us, you know.” I paused to gage his reaction. Not seeing any confusion, I continued. “I know what I said when I got back from LA. I know I want this physical relationship with you and trust me, I really do. It’s just that I am afraid that that is all that this new relationship will be based on. And I don’t want that and I’m sure you don’t want that either.” I saw him quirk and eyebrow.
“I’m one hundred percent ok with that” He smirked and I knew he was joking.
“Harry.” I slapped his chest lightly and we both chuckled at his joke. “We never had a problem being on the same level physically. Sure it slowed down the last few months we were together but that wasn’t because I didn’t want to have sex with you. I wanted you all the time. It was because the emotional part of our relationship suffered. I was losing trust in you and you were pulling away because I was. I want us to have this sexual relationship but I also want to be able to go out with you without the expectation of having sex afterwards. Sex was never our problem. We certainly don’t have to work on that. We have to work on being together emotionally. We have to make sure that our relationship is stronger than it was. I want to make sure that there is no need for you to feel like you need to find comfort with someone else, like I pushed you to do las-” He stopped me with a finger to my lips.
“I was an asshole last time. You didn’t do anything wrong. I knew you were fighting for us. I saw the struggle but I guess we were just fighting so much that I didn’t care enough.”
“Harry, don’t put all of the blame on youself. I may have been fighting for us but not hard enough. I didn’t make you feel as good as I should have.” I dropped my head in shame. He lifted it back up only moments later.
“You weren’t at fault. I’m the one who hid mine and his friendship from you because I knew the connection that was growing was wrong. I’m the one who cheated”
“Almost cheated” I interjected.
“Almost cheated. But you were right. I was about to kiss him. I was about to give in. I would have cheated if you hadn’t been there and I am thankful every day that you caught me before I could do anything. It was my fault, Ni. Everything was my fault. You left me because I gave you no choice. I messed up.” A tear slipped from his eye and I gently wiped it away with the pad of my thumb.
“You are not all to blame. I wasn’t making enough effort to keep you emotionally happy and in turn you started to find that connection in another person. Can’t we agree that we were both at fault?”
“Fine. But I was more at fault.” He smiled.
“Whatever you want, babe.” I smiled in reply. “But do you understand what I am meaning by working on our relationship aside from the sex?”
“Yes. I get it.” He stated. “I love you and will do anything for us to be boyfriends again and completely happy with all aspects of our relationship.”
“Good. Me too.” I placed a chaste kiss on his lips but before I could pull away, he held me in place.
“But the sex is so much fun.” He mumbled against my skin and began to lean my body down on the couch.
“Harry” I yelled with playfulness in my voice and slipped from underneath him, my body landing on the ground while his face landed onto the cushion with an ‘umf’ leaving his lips.
I stood up and patted myself off and reached out for his hands. I helped him off the sofa and walked him towards the door.
“Will you go on a date with me?” He asks before we exit the office. I smile brightly at him and nod.
“Absolutely, yes” I reply and hook my arm around his body and pull him down so that his lips press against mine.