Chapter 48
It was too much, and all happening at once. At this point, I just wanted to run away with Luke and grab Francis on the way. It began to seem like the best option after a few days passed and everything seemed to be just weighing down. Heavy. And ready to break us at any second. Things, at the very least, started to calm down. We tried ignoring the issues with the group of ass wipes that wanted to kill me. We needed to until Francis managed to set up a meeting somehow with this Pauly guy. He was trying to get as much information as he could about who this guy was and how to contact him. Until then, we were left 'entertaining' ourselves. It was surprisingly okay if we could stay distracted.
Homework took up a lot of the 'distracting' time for me. But when I finished up, I would look for Luke to entertain me - and no, not in the way it sounds unfortunately. When I finished with my work one day and put it in my bag, I went downstairs with Jack only to find Luke sitting on the couch watching TV. His feet propped up on the coffee table, his eyes were trained on the screen watching Cops from what I could see, staring at the back of him.
Coming down the stairs, I smiled slightly as I neared the couch and eventually came into his sight. "Hey," he smiled, looking up to me as I plopped myself down on the couch, Jack jumping up on the other side of the couch with me. "Finished?"
"Yeah, finally," I said.
"You're turning me into someone I'm not," he said, all too seriously that it made me raise a brow when he spoke those words. His neck craning, he looked down to me from where I was sitting next to him now.
"Really?" I crossed my arms. This should be good.
"Yeah... my attention resorts to TV now apparently and not my book I'm trying to finish," he said, nodding to the closed thick book sitting on the coffee table. I chuckled slightly.
"That's how it should be. Reading is boring. You went up a notch on the 'cool' scale officer."
"I am not proud I picked Cops over a book," he said, lips tilting up slightly. A moment of silence passed between us after that, and our attention mindlessly moved to the screen. We watched through the screen a cop tackle someone to the ground, followed by several other cops surrounding the scene. I smirked. I can't watch this show without thinking about Luke.
"What do you think, am I better than these amateurs?" he asked down to me. His green sweet eyes held mine in amusement. It was nice to have this moment between us. After all, lately our thoughts are filled with nothing but worry over Francis and when we are together, we are talking about what could happen. I was welcoming this.
I turned more towards him. "Eh..." I pretended to think it over for moment. "Yeah," I decided.
"Why did it take you so long to answer?" he asked, in an offended voice.
"Well... if I recall, you didn't tackle me like that when you arrested me," I said, gesturing to the screen as I recalled the moment I first met Luke. Very charming and didn't cause grass stains at all - sarcasm at it's finest, ladies and gents.
"Excuse me?" he asked, crossing his arms and sitting forward more on the couch, turning more towards me to stare at me.
I put my hands up, defending myself. "Well... I did put up a fight. If you were as good as they look to be, you would have had me restrained fully the second you came into contact with me."
"I did!" He said in a higher voice, making me laugh. "You struggled but I restrained you perfectly."
That argument went on for longer than I'm willing to say I'm proud of. It ended with me laughing and him playfully pouting, with no resolution. We went back to just sitting besides each other, watching the show until my thoughts eventually went back to our worries - what I was just trying to avoid thinking about. There was nothing we could do until Francis sets up that meeting date with Pauly. Until then, we were stuck in our thoughts. It was an unhealthy place to be because it made us both get this sickly feeling.
"Do you think it's worth it?" I asked Luke, looking up to him. I didn't need to specify either; he knew what I meant.
He pursed his lips and spoke, eyes still lost in his thoughts, staring blankly at the TV. "I don't think it is," he said in a quiet voice. Looking down to me, he sighed. "It's not up to me. I've called Francis a couple times now and he is still dead set on doing this."
"I don't know what I'll do if anything happens to him," I shook my head. I don't care what he says, it will be directly my fault if something terrible happens.
"He will be okay," he reassured me right away. "He will be monitored whenever he meets with this guy."
"I just mean in general... I don't see how he can do this without it backfiring. They will eventually find out he is a traitor."
"That's not a problem yet. So we can't worry about that too right now. We are worried about enough as it is," he said, resting his hand over mine gently, eyes in mine sure. It made me a little less tense at least.
"Did you find anything on the doctor?" I asked, wondering if he found anything. After all, he told me he started looking into the doctor that was mentioned to have cared for Clare while she was pregnant and took care of Emily too. Apparently, all the same doctor. But that's all we knew thus far. Or me rather since he was looking into it here and there the past few days - another 'distracter' that helped us out.
"He's a primarily a pediatrician but works in other fields sometimes, which is a bit unusual. I found out where he lives. He has a wife and one kid. More importantly... his name." Luke said, sighing as he gave me a more meaningful look.
"What about it?"
"Well... I didn't want to tell you really. You have enough to deal with so I--"
"Come on dude, you are going through what I am. I can handle it. After everything that has happened and I found out, I'm prepared for anything."
Luke sighed, pursing his lips and looked a little disturbed. But he decided to answer me. "Well... when he got married, he actually took his wife's last name as his. Usually it's the other way around. It's strange... but I looked into it more. And I found out the doctor's name before he was married was... Denport."
My eyebrows shot up and I leaned back more into the couch, surprised by this news. Denport... the sheriffs name. The doctor and the sheriff held the same last name and it was too much of a coincidence for them not to be related. I could feel the need to start attaching strings to all this.... The doctor and sheriff were related somehow. We just needed to know more and how they both connect to Clare besides one being her doctor.
"Wow..." I sighed.
"Yeah," Luke sighed. "I want to talk with him soon. I need to know what his connection could be to the sheriff. I'm assuming their related and helped each other... but that is clearly the link between the sheriff and Clare. I'm guessing the sheriff was helping the doctor out somehow in whatever way and that's how they are connected. It's all still just fuzzy... so I want to meet this guy."
My mind went through the aftershock of that knowledge... but also the relief. This was progress after all. We had a connection to the sheriff and Clare and it was safe to assume something happened between them. We just needed to figure that out - an even bigger headache soon enough I was sure.
"Don't think about it now though. We have enough to worry about. I don't want to dive any further into this case with Clare until after Francis meets this Pauly. I want one problem out of the way before we face another."
"That's a good idea," I nodded, sighing as I thought through what he just told me. Because yeah, it was a little too much for us to handle. That's why I agreed... lets get this thing with the gang over with, have Francis propose his deal and when that's over, and if Pauly calls off them from coming at us, we will look more into the doctor. It was a big plan... and I hoped it would work.
One problem at a time... a good way to go about doing this. After all, this whole time, we were just dealing with everything at once when it was thrown at us. But like we did with our little break, some things could wait. Including the whole thing with Clare and Emily.... She has been dead for years and though I wanted this done, there was no bomb, no real rush besides the fact that Clare was getting much more suspicious. We needed to stay in this house, in control, until we are ready to take her down.
We went back to regular conversation, which was nice and continued watching Cops for a while longer. However, it wasn't long after the third one we watched that we eventually heard Clare pull into the driveway. Even when she was sometimes home late, we still would always let out a heavy sigh. As if she should be gone a little longer more. The head lights shined through the windows for a moment as she pulled up before we heard the car shut off.
"Great," Luke sat forward more, resting his head in his hand where he propped his elbow up on his leg. "I'm so sick of her."
I rubbed his back, sitting forward slightly. "I give you permission to hit her. I missed it when you did it before and I woudln't mind actually seeing you do it," I said, smiling.
He laughed, glancing up to me as we heard her walking up to the porch. I moved my hand away from him, and looked at the door expectantly. When she came in through the door, a rush of the chilly air followed behind her. If anything, it should feel like fire. She was from hell, after all, fucking devil's mistress.
"Hey guys," she said in a cheery voice. She could shove it right back up her ass.
"Hey Clare," Luke said in a sweet voice to her. Sighing under his breath just enough for me to here his reluctance, he stood up from the couch and went up to her, giving her a soft kiss that made me cringe still... every time I see shit like that, I'm so repulsed and get angry... Luke's been avoiding kissing her hello for enough days though that it would start getting suspicious. Of course, I argued we already passed that point.
It reached new levels though... and I could feel it burning in me. Especially when it came to when we were sitting around the table, eating dinner that night. Clare, sitting at the head of the table with me and Luke sitting across from each other, was acting weird... for someone like her. And it made me especially uncomfortable. I think that was part of her goal with what she started to do.
She was laying on the love really thick and quite obviously something was up. She was giving Luke more attention than she usually would. Clare was the one that stirred and kept the conversation going between us. Well mainly her and Luke. She wasn't afraid of hiding how obvious she was being by bringing up the sweet memories she shared when her husband was under her spell. She was trying to get to us.
"Do you remember our first date?" she asked Luke in a happy voice, smiling to him in suggestion and staring into his eyes lovingly. After she swallowed a bite of her food, she rested a hand on his free one that wasn't occupied shoving food in his mouth with his fork. He raised his eyebrows, surprised she was going this route. Of course, this was following a conversation of how lucky she was to have such a great husband and daughter.
Luke, the poor guy, had to play along. He chuckled, and tried not to look uncomfortable. "Yeah, I do," he nodded as he took a bite of his food, looking into her eyes and giving her as much of an adoring look as he could muster up.
She sighed dreamily and it made me that much more nervous. She looked over to me and grinned. "You will not believe what he did for me on our first date. He took me out to a nice romantic dinner and then took me to see a drive in movie. So sweet," she said, smiling.
My date with him was better bitch.... Of course, my thoughts were more concerned than that one. It shook me up... not with anger or jealousy or anything of that nature. What was getting to me was the fact that she was bringing this up to begin with, just after Luke and I had out first date. I was sure it had to be a coincidence... but that didn't rule out that she might know we had feelings for each other. Did she hear us one night talking or flirting? The wall separating us was thin after all.... Did she see us somehow, someway together? We were careful yes, but there have been chances where it was possible and it could have happened!
Her words were getting to me... and when she glanced back and stared into Luke's eyes, I let the panic and the worry hit my eyes over this. My chest jumped up as I looked to where Luke was playing along smoothly. I could only imagine how freaked out he was by this obvious show of 'love' she was trying to get across. But why? To tease us and tell us she knew about us? Or was it just for me, to tease me only like she did before because she suspected I had feelings for him and couldn't have him? It was one of them, it had to be. I was hoping it was the later and she was just trying to rub it in that she had him and I didn't.
"Oh my god, Luke," she said, as if something was just dawning on her. "Tell Albany what you did for me when you proposed!" she said, getting excited and wrapped up in all these sweet memories... and though all this was worrying me over our cover being blow... I wont lie, as this went on, I realized the depth their relationship had before. They were married after all... this only justified why in a way I didn't consider before (which was ignorant of me; it was common sense, this depth in their relationship existed before he met me. They were married after all).
Luke swallowed slightly but didn't break. A smile playing over his face, he looked across the table to where I was sitting, staring at him. Holding a smile forcefully I knew, I saw his jaw clench but he didn't give in. He couldn't and he was forced to go along with all this. I tried to look as if this wasn't affecting me. "I uh," he chuckled at the memory - though I knew he was just trying to get it together. After all, I knew he was feeling guilty now at telling me all this. Maybe that was her goal. To make him feel guilty as she expected him of betraying their love. "You see, your mother and I were going for a walk in the park at night. And I... I um just stopped... and had her face me. I got down on one knee there and proposed there," he said, his eyes hiding the pain I knew he felt. Whether at the memory of a marriage failed or the pain he held in telling me that.
"It was so sweet, Albany," she gushed as I nodded, pursing my lips and acting as if I didn't care - to an extent I really didn't. "And to think, that was only nearly a year ago... wow, it really hasn't been that long ago since you proposed, let alone we got married," she said back to Luke.
"Yeah, I know," Luke said, and when Clare looked back to me, I saw him allow his face to pale, and his eyes grow. He gave a sigh, staring into my eyes, looking incredibly sorry. Just as equally, he looked panicked like I felt but tried pulling it back in and masking it when Clare spoke to me.
"It was at that moment that I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with your father," she said, gripping his hand more and offering him, once more, such an adoring look when he composed himself. It made my stomach jump... especially when she referred to him as my father. What bothered me too was realizing... that I wasn't just in love with him. I was in love with him freshly out of a broken marriage. A marriage that looked to have been full of love between them... even if she was a liar and it wouldn't have lasted. I tried blocking it out, knowing she was trying to hurt me this way, by making me see what they had before I came back home.
"He's not my dad," I told her, in a voice that was a little too stern and sensitive when trying to come off aggravated.
"Yes he is darling," she said, patting my own hand, which went still holding my fork the second she started filling my head with images of them together romantically. Filling my head with panic that she figured us out. "I know it took some time for you to come around and all, but I know he is the prefect father for you. I can rely on him to take care of you... like a daughter," she stressed, and it nearly made me drop my fork. I could feel my face start to heat up and I rolled my eyes, acting like her words had no impact.
Seeing the place Clare was putting me in, and realizing that she was hinting that she clearly knew what was going on between us, Luke tried to save that image we wanted her to have of him. Of the loyal husband we wanted her to believe was still here. That's why I understood what he did next.
"She is like a daughter to me," he said, getting her attention again. She gave him a sweet smile, but it was tight this time. Any second, I felt like she was going to tell us she knew we were together. Luke's eyes buried themselves in hers. "She just makes me happy I found you. I never would have if it wasn't for your friend that introduced us..." Luke glanced over to me after purposefully bringing that up, trying to validate his loyalty by explaining this to me. His eyes met mine and I saw, that even with Clare watching, his eyes showed so much sorrow as he spoke, his fake smile still there and strong. "You see, your mother had a friend I met in college and stayed in touch with. Anyway, he kept telling me that I needed to meet her because he thought we would really hit it off. So... we eventually met for dinner. I fell for her then and there," Luke said, his voice wavering just slightly at the end, glancing over to Clare, who was smiling at his words. His smile, I noticed, looked... mechanical. Forced more and more until he could barely support it anymore. Finally, Clare looked back over to me, giving me the details of it... which I wasn't in the condition of hearing at the moment.
"He was so sweet and nervous. He started to sweat, even before we actually spoke a word to each other." She chuckled gleefully at the memory. "I knew he was the one for me right away."
Luke composed himself once again, looking to me and smiling, nodding. I just stared between them, acting as if I didn't care one bit. I didn't say anything else, feeling that my voice might betray me. Either by yelling at her or breaking. The rest of the dinner went by... silently. Nothing was said as she continued to hold his hand. It put us on edge. A smile was on her face the whole time we ate, not bringing up anything else after that. It just made it that much more unsettling. I was almost convinced... that somehow she knew. She at least must have had a clue - why else would she bring all that shit up? She knew I didn't want to hear it, either to push me or try to make me jealous. Either to make Luke feel guilty... I didn't know but it was clear something was up. And it scared me, honestly. Especially when me and Luke just spoke of putting the issue with Clare off to the side until the whole gang thing is finished. If she figures us out, and openly points us out for it, we would be forced to act on it instantly. I just hoped it wouldn't come to that.
Longest dinner of my life, to say the least. And of course, we were eating shit that took forever to chew. I would have rather choked on it going down than sit there any longer. Eventually though, dinner was done and I nonchalantly headed upstairs to shower and head to bed. Luke wasn't so lucky... she asked him to help him do the dishes with her. I feared what else she was talking about with him. I imagined her bitching him out and telling him she knew everything since I headed upstairs. However, I figured if that were to happen, she would have a gun in her hand. God, I don't even want think about that.
By the time I heard them get ready for bed through the walls, I was pacing around my room. Jack watched me from where he was sitting on my bed, wagging his little tail at my movement. How I still wish I was in his place... not only would I be stress free, I'd have tail like his. It got to the point where I forced myself to sit down on my bed, and wait for Luke to get up here. When he finally did, dressed in a baggy shirt and shorts for bed, he shut the door behind him... and turned towards me. His eyes were wide, and in the comfort of only me now, he could express what was really going through him. And that was a huge amount of anxiousness and sorrow. His sweet eyes, framed with furrowing brows, met mine and his breath increased. He leaned back against the door after locking it, running a hand through his hair. "Fuck," he said in a broken voice, eyes in mine.
I bite my lip, and didn't even realize I had stood up upon his entrance. My hands in fists at my side, I wanted to beat the shit out of her. He neared where I was standing by my bed and wrapped his arms around my waist instantly, holding me to him. I did the same, my arms folding around his back. I felt his nose dip and bury in my hair, taking a deep breath and trying to let the panic I could feel go through him in his tense body pass. "I'm sorry," he murmured, so softly I could barely hear him. I suppose that was for the best when Clare might have been fucking listening to us all this time!
"For what?" I whispered. I moved away slightly and looked up to him.
"You shouldn't have heard all that stuff about our past together. I could tell it bothered you, that reminder that I use to be in love with her."
I scoffed, surprised that was what was more concerning to him over the fear of her actually finding out about us. "It wasn't... that bad. It just... wasn't something I was ready to hear. Especially when I'm romantically involved with you and she is there, rubbing it in my face that..." I sighed, shaking my head. It didn't matter. That was all the past and I was his present and future - no matter how crazy that felt. "That was her point though. And that scares me more," I said under my breath just lightly as his hands on my arms guided me to sit down on the bed with him. Our lips were close to each others ears as we spoke, not wanting her to hear.
His eyes gazed down into mine and he gave a deep sigh, showing me his nervousness over this. "I don't know how she would know about us though."
"Well it's pretty fucking clear that she was hinting that she knew. I think she was trying to make you feel guilty by reminding you of the time you spent with her, that I'm your step daughter, that you proposed to her under a year ago.... She's teasing us. She at least has some sort of an idea," I said, my voice breaking slightly in panic as I searched his eyes. "What are we going to do?"
"I don't know but from tonight... I don't think we should do anything yet. If she truly knows, and didn't point it out flattly, she wont anytime soon. I don't know why she wouldn't do anything about it and it worries me. But we can't go anywhere. You are bound to your mother, not to me if we decide to just leave. She could fight me for you and she would win in court. Then, I woudln't be able to see you according to the law and I must be with you, to protect you from her. If we run, and she knows it's because of her, she will come at us with the law and win. So... I don't see any other option than to just wait."
I sighed in anger. "Why us?" I groaned. "We have more than a few reasons now why we should run," I growled under my breath.
"We run, we fuck things up with Clare and with the law. And at a time we especially can't when we are waiting for Francis to make his offer. Our focus needs to be on those assholes right now, remember? We just talked about it," he said, scoffing at the irony.
"What are we going to do sitting here?"
"She doesn't look ready for war yet with us. If she's calm, we need to be. Does it scare me, what she said tonight and the obvious hinting she gave? Hell yeah it does," he said. "But it's best if we handle this here. Besides, she wants to play... we can play back. Acting all lovey dovey, I might be able to take advantage of it."
"How do you mean?"
"Even if she is questioning what's going on between me and you, tonight she played with us, bringing up our past and how great our future is together... I can encourage it, get on her side more, and push maybe at installing a pool. Of course, all this is after we resolve the whole thing with the gang. Which hopefully wont be long away. After that, we will deal with Clare and Emily.... But throughout all this, we need to lay low, play dumb around her, and pray she doesn't do something stupid."
I closed my eyes and sighed. So much shit... so much! I just wanted out of here with him; it's never that easy. I was her daughter after all and if I somehow am 'taken by my stepfather' Clare can get the law to came after me, knowing that Luke would be with me. He would lose rights to see me since he is only my step father, and I would be fucked. That was the whole reason of him keeping quiet that he knew the truth about me. Because he needed to stay in the house, married, so he could protect me. Our only choice was to go on, with him as a loyal husband. That gave him the ticket to keep watching over me.
We coudln't do anything about what she hinted at tonight. Our focus needed to stay on the gang... and when that's over, we go after the doctor and question him. We are walking on thin ice... but ice we must walk. Close and closer to Emily... we needed to keep going.
I nodded. "Deal with the whole pool thing and the doctor after we are done with the gang," saying it mostly to myself to try to get it through my head. There is just so much!
He seemed to understand that from the look in his eyes. He wrapped an arm around my back in comfort. Soon, we both moved under the covers for bed. Jack laying at our feet, I felt Luke wrap an arm over me and pull me against him, which I... surprisingly felt dirty for.
"Everything will be okay," he said in a sweet voice, facing me as he brushed my skin with his hand. Resting against him, staring into his eyes, I felt my heart sped up... and dinner came back to me, just as I felt Luke start leaning closer to me.
Really hasn't been that long ago since you proposed, let alone we got married... I knew he was the one for me.. like a daughter.... Those words said at dinner rang in my head and though I loved Luke to death, was attracted to him, and wanted him... that reminder tonight of Clare and his past with her made me feel sick.
"Luke," I said in a soft voice, leaning back and away from where he was close to pressing our lips together. "I just... can't touch you like that tonight," I said, feeling so bad for saying that.
He raised his eyebrows. "What?" he asked, not understanding and looking upset and sorry, as if he did something wrong. Poor guy didn't deserve this.
"I just..." I sighed. "After hearing about how you proposed to her and stuff... knowing it wasn't long ago, it makes me feel sick. Probably because she's my mother. I-I'm sorry," I cupped his cheek. "Just please don't kiss me tonight. It's too soon after all her bullshit."
He leaned up slightly, staring down at me with hurt eyes. "Too soon? That's my past, Albany. It's not just going to fade away over night," he said softly but defending too. "It's never going to fade."
I groaned, knowing I shouldn't have said anything. "I know," I nodded. "And I have accepted that as your past. I accept you. But when I'm told in detail how you and my mother spent only the last year in love, I just feel... a little dirty. For tonight."
"That makes no sense," he said. "You're disgusted by my past, and I understand. But it will forever be my past. If you're repulsed by me tonight, then that should mean you will always be repulsed--"
"I'm not repulsed by you," I said in a pleading voice. Christ, this was getting out of hand. And I knew where he was coming from. I guess what I was saying wasn't making much sense. But... I didn't expect to learn about their love life tonight in more detail, when it's still fresh in my head. "I just wasn't expecting to hear about you and my mother being together in that way. Now, I will get over it by tomorrow but tonight... just no," I said a little more persistent. God, I felt bad but I knew he should understand.
Looking up into his eyes, I saw it come to him. And he did understand, really. He pursed his lips and the next moment, he gave me a curt nod, looking down and away from my eyes. I wanted to apologize right away for it but he spoke before I could. "Do you want me to sleep on the floor tonight?"
I scoffed, shaking my head. "No, I don't," I sighed. I grasped his hand in mine. "I'm sorry but you understand don't you?"
"Yes, I do," he said under his breath. A moment of silence passed between us before I felt him slide away from me and out of the bed. He flicked on the lamp and I noticed he dragged out the several blankets in my closet and make his bed on the floor. I couldn't blame him really. After all, I felt like I was being a bitch. He didn't do anything wrong but I also knew it was understandable where I was coming from.
I found out though the next day that things would be a little more serious. More so than a little tiff that was next to nothing in importance. And it all started when we both fell asleep without another word.
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I thought it was important to really get across the reality of the realtionship between them - and how it was before with Luke and Clare. I hope you liked it!