Archer's POV
I've come to a conclusion. After struggling and thinking since I've came back to the Alliance, I know what I want to do.
I want to die...
It seems like a bad thing to think, and I've told myself that many times. But it seems worth it. Evelyn even told me this. Why didn't she kill me when I was there? Simple. Because dying is good, living is horrible.
And I'm done suffering.
I've encountered all the pain living does to you. In fact, for only being a teenager I've experienced more pain than most other people. Never would I have thought I would be tortured; be put in a small cube, be whipped, be forced to watch a sibling die, sit behind bars for most days, and not eating for weeks. I never knew I had that coming.
Did I deserve it?
Probably. Evelyn was right; I'm a cold hearted person, I'm the bad guy.
Bad guys never have happy endings.
So maybe this is when I'm supposed to die. How? I don't know, maybe Adam could do the job. An "accidental" thing, maybe. But Adam is the good guy.
Although usually the good guys kill the bad.
But as he sits on his bed across from me, a smile on his face, I know he would never.
I give him a small smile back, only because he said some joke I was not listening to. He knows this, he knows I zone out over half the time he talks to me.
"You never liked my jokes, hah!" Adam says.
Maybe Mia could do it. She's killed me before.
Mia. I saw her earlier. Why was she looking at me like that? So innocent, so scared? It's probably my fault. I wrecked her; I tore her away from her home, I put her through shit, hell, I put her through me.
I wrecked her, but she wrecked me right back.
Maybe she knew this was coming. She knew I was going to die, so she helped me, made it a little faster. Maybe she wanted Evelyn to do the job, to rid of me once and for all.
"Archer! Hey, it's okay!"
I feel Adam's arms around me. I didn't even realize I've clenched the sides of my bed, gasping and sweating like crazy.
This surprises me every time.
But it happens all the time.
"What was it this time?" Adam asks.
"About dying." I say simply. Adam freezes. "Dying? Come on bud, you aren't dying."
How do you know?
I nod, though.
"Maybe you should get some sleep. It's late." He says.
Sleeping gives me nightmares. Bad idea.
"I guess." I say. "You can hang out with your friends, I'm okay alone."
"You are my friend. And I'm not going to leave you alone."
Dave probably told him to keep an eye on me. He's probably forced. Poor guy.
"She wants to see you, though."
She?
"Who are you talking about." I say.
"Mia."
I freeze at the name again. She wants to see me. She wants to kill me.
"She loves you, you know. I don't know how you feel, but her feelings won't change."
She loves me?
Now I'm confused. She wants to kill me. She loves me.
"She loves me. She wants me dead..."
"Archer, she does not want you dead. You should've seen her when she realized you were still alive. You should of seen her when you were gone. She loves you, man."
"You're confusing me," I grab my head with my hands, trying not to panic again. Adam stays silent, letting me figure it out, like I always do.
"Just ponder it." He says after a few minutes of me trying to calm back down.
"What happened to Dana?" I ask. It's a random question, but I haven't seen her since I was taken.
"Um...she had some problems. When we went to the government to find you, there was a bomb-"
"She died." I say.
"No, actually. Lost her leg, but she's still here." Adam says.
Dana almost died trying to get me.
Another reason why I should die. Pretty soon everyone will be risking their lives for me, and dying because of it. I'm not worth dying for, they should know.
Why the fuck am I still alive?
I want to ask Adam this, but he'll only say something like "we care about you, Archer. Nobody wants you to die. You're strong."
Nobody cares. Everyone wants me to die. I'm weak.
I hear a knock on the door. For a moment I think I'm the only one who hears it, but Adam stands up and opens the door.
And in she comes.
Mia.
She looks at me immediately. I squeeze my wrists.
"You know my name." Is all she says. I look at her strangely. She has a wild look on her face.
Mia.
She steps closer. Adam tells her to stop. She ignores him.
Don't come closer.
"Say it."
Don't take another fucking step.
"Archer."
I stand up, but she doesn't react.
Don't come near me.
"Say it!"
"If you take another fucking step-" I say. She pauses for a moment, staring through my eyes.
"Mia, stop! He warned you, you need to listen to him." Adam says in a panicked tone.
"Just say my name. Please?!" She cries.
"Don't-" I whisper.
And she takes another step.
I swing my arm at her, my fist connecting with her cheek. She falls to the ground immediately. I hold my wrists, looking down at her, realizing what I had just done.
Shit.
"I'm sorr-"
I then ook up and see Casper walk in, an angry look on his face.
They are all after me. They all want to kill me.
I cry as he picks me up like I weigh nothing, and throws me on the ground. I smack my head on the floor, and cough up blood almost immediately. He looks down at me, and punches me right in the jaw. I cry out, gasping for air as I hear Adam scream and Mia cry. He keeps punching; my jaw, cheek, eyes, chest...
"Casper, stop!" Adam yells.
They all want me dead. This is it.
"End it." I gasp, and everyone stops. Casper looks down at me curiously.
"Kill me, please. End it." I beg. Casper let's go of me.
"No! Do it." I grab his shirt, looking at his eyes.
"Casper, get off him." I hear Mia say.
He gets up, and I stay on the floor, trying to catch my breath. I look at Mia.
She wants me dead.
"Do it." I whisper. She looks down at me.
"Mia."
Now I have her attention. Her eyes water, she looks devastated yet pleased at the same time.
"Mia, please. End it, I want it to end."
"I would never. I love you." She whispers.
She loves me. Mia loves me.
And I blackout before I can answer her back.
••••••
HELLO!!
Well, you guys did it again. You convinced me to write ANOTHER CHAPTER!!
Honestly all your comments made my day and got me inspired, so here you go!!
I hope you enjoyed this chapter, I know it's a little boring but I'm just getting used to this story again.
IF YOU GUYS HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS OR PLANS ON WHERE YOU WANT THIS STORY TO GO LET ME KNOW!
I've been thinking about where I want this story to go, but it would be nice to see where YOU GUYS want this to go!
Thank you :)