38.
* Michael's POV *
"The weather in London will-"
"Why are you watching the news?" I asked Luke as my eyes opened. It looked as though it was around eleven in the morning, but I had been wrong at guessing time a lot.
"I just turned on the TV and this is the first thing that came on." He replied, and started to flick through the channels.
After he had found a show to watch, I sat up and started to play with my hair. I knew I had an extreme case of bed-head. Soon I had my hair where it was meant to be, and started to look around the hotel room like I normally did.
Luke was sitting cross-legged on his bed, staring at the television. He was already dressed in skinny-jeans and a Nirvana shirt, so he had probably already went down to the brunch. The room looked almost empty, only the objects that were in the room when we arrived were in sight.
The reason that the room wasn't a mess, was because it was our last day in London. We were returning to Australia to finish our album, then probably do a tour of some sort. I had packed my things the night before, because I knew that I would have been too lazy in the morning and probably forget things.
"You might want to get ready soon, we have to leave in around two hours." I nodded, before grabbing the clothes I had left on top of my suitcase and walking to the bathroom,
Turning on the shower, I started to remove the clothing I had on. After I was naked, I stepped into the shower, where I was met by burning water. It took a while to adjust the heat, but finally it was at the perfect temperature. After I had washed my hair, I went to my usual routine of thinking about anything and everything.
I replayed the moments where me and Ashton had broken up in my head. This made me get a sick feeling to my stomach, and a feeling as though I was going to throw up. It had been five days since he had broke up with me, and since then we had minimal contact. We had made awkward eye contacts quite a few times, which resulted in us both turning away quickly.
Since New Years, I haven't ate that much, only the occasional buscuit and piece of fruit that I was lucky to not want to throw up afterwards. The other boys had noticed this, but fortunately didn't bring it up in any conversations. My stomach let out a grumble, which made me sigh. I had heard that grumble way too many times.
After I knew I had been in the shower for far too long, I turned off the water and wrapped a towel around my body. For a while, I just stared at the mirror making rediculous faces until I heard the hotel room door open and then shut after a moment.
"We have to leave in like ten minutes!" A voice I recognized as Calum's yelled. I started to dry myself, before slowly changing into my jeans and shirt. Honestly, I didn't care if they had to wait for me to finish getting ready before they could leave.
"Where the hell is Michael?"
"In the shower." Luke replied to Calum's question.
"Of course he is. He's even worse than you now Luke." Ashton replied, and I remembered that conversation we had when I came out of the shower in the other hotel room.
"That could never happen!"
"You have been defeated my friend." Calum said. After I had fixed up my hair, I dumped the towel on the bathroom floor before leaving the room. All of the bohs acknowledged my entrance into the room, as I threw the clothes I had been wearing previously into my suitcase.
"Dude, we have to leave in like two minutes!" Calum basically screamed as I zipped my suitcase back up.
"I have to have good hygiene!" I replied, as I picked up my suitcase and started to drag it along the carpet. Luke started to do the same, and once Ashton and Calum had grabbed their suitcases, we all made our way to the elevator. Calum's mother joined us after a moment.
"I'm gonna miss this hotel." Luke laughed as we waited for the elevator to open.
"Luke we are always in hotels."
"So? I'll miss this one the most!" I was pretty sure he would only miss this one because he liked the food, because apart from the food the hotel was basically the same as every other hotel.
As we exited the hotel after checking-out, the cold winter breeze hit my skin. It wasn't as cold as it had been the last couple of days, but it was still way colder than Australia. There was probably fires covering Australia at that moment.
After we had put our suitcases in the back of the taxi, we all sat down and the vehicle started to move. As we drove through the city, I could notice that it had started to rain because people started to put up umbrellas and head indoors. It was weird to every single person there had their own life, their own story. Some of them could even be going through a situation similar to mine.
"We will probably burn as soon as we get to Australia! It's so cold here compared to over there." Ashton said as he looked out the window.
"That wouldn't surprise me." Calum's mother said.
"It's probably like fifty degrees over there." Calum commented. The three boys and Joy continued to have a conversation about the weather in Australia compared to England while I stayed silent. I wasn't in the mood to speak.
As we reached the airport, I noticed that there was a plane taking off. For a moment I began to wonder all the places that it could be going until the boys started to talk again. "Woah, we're actually leaving England!" Calum said, reaching for the door handle.
"We have only been here for like two weeks Cal." I replied, getting out of the car. It was still raining, but I didn't bother to run under cover, instead let the rain pour on me.
After I had grabbed my suitcase, I started to wheel it inside. The airport smell greeted me as the sliding doors closed behind me. Why couldn't airports smell better?
"Let's go." Calum's mum led us through the airport, through security, until we were at the waiting area. The place was crowded, there was only a few seats in the corner that weren't occupied by a person or their belongings.
"OMG it's Five Seconds of Summer!" Someone screamed, and people started to run towards us. The other people in the room gave us strange looks, as around a hundred teenagers started to ask us for pictures. We stood up, and started to show fake smiles.
People started to push, and next thing we knew, it was a replay of what had happened when we had arrived in England. Our fan-base was like our own paparazzi.
"Stop it!"
"Ashton!"
"Pictures please!"
"Stop mobbing them!"
"You're pissing them off!"
"I love you Luke!" As the teenagers continued to scream, I could feel myself starting to freak out. They were all crowded around us, and I could feel claustrophobia come in.
Finally, the speaker called our flight, and I basically ran to the line that had started to form. The three other boys and Calum's mother joined me, and before we knew it, we were at the front of the line. "Boarding Pass?" She asked, and I showed the woman the piece of paper before heading towards the plane.
We had to stand outside in the cold for a while until we were finally let onto the plane. I was grateful that it was warm on the aeroplane, and that the person in-front of me wasn't slow. As I found my seat, I sat down into it, followed by Calum sitting beside me.
"So hello." Calum laughed as he fastened his seat-belt.
"Hey." I replied, looking over at Ashton who was in a different column than me. He was sitting in the middle of Joy and Luke. He didn't look very happy, I think he wanted to sit alone.
"Welcome aboard!" The flight attendant spoke, and they started to go through the safety instructions. I had heard them many times before, so I had memorized what to do if there was a crash.
The plane started to take off, and I looked through the window as it took off. Calum didn't talk, which made me happy because I wasn't in the mood to have a deep conversation. I was tired, but I didn't like to sleep on planes because I was scared that it would land and everyone would leave me on the plane.
"I know how you feel about Ashton." Calum stated once the plane was in the air.
"How?"
"It's how I feel about Becca."
"I'm sure it isn't." I replied, wondering how on Earth anyone could feel that way about her. She was nice sometimes, but I didn't think anyone would think about her like that.
"Whenever I'm with her, I can't be sad. She makes me smile by even speaking. She has the voice of an angel." I stared at Calum for a moment, trying to make sure he was kidding. But he wasn't kidding.
"Uh okay." I replied awkwardly. I looked down at my feet for a minute, trying to think of any thing else to say. Although I wasn't in the mood for a conversation, I didn't want to be ruder than I already sounded.
"Can I ask you a question?"
"Sure." I replied.
"If you could go back in time to the day we played truth or dare and not have played, would you?" It took me a while to think about the question before I thought of an answer. And I think the answer wasn't the one he expected.
"I think I would."
"Are you saying you regret going out with Ash?" He tried to sound polite, but it came out rudely.
"No! I would've just let our relationship go differently. There's so many things I regret doing since our relationship started, and maybe if it started differently, it wouldn't have ended up like this." I sighed after I spoke, and stared out the window.
---
When we arrived back at our apartment, we all took our suitcases to our rooms. Afterwards, Ashton turned on the air conditioning, Calum said good-bye to his mother and the three boys sat on the couch and watched TV. Instead of joining the boys, I walked back to my bedroom.
As I slammed the door behind me, I fell back on my bed and stared at the ceiling. I couldn't help but think that I never belonged with the other three boys, as though I was never meant to be in the band. "Would anyone even care if I left the band?" I mumbled to myself.
Tears started to roll down my cheeks as I continued to think about how better the world would be if I wasn't in it. If I had never existed, or even if I killed myself. I wondered if anyone would even attend my funeral, convincing myself that no one would.
-{ I don't even know what to ask for this chapter...}-