Blake's POV from Chapter 27
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My eyes slowly open to the sound of Shannon's voice.
"Gosh, what happened?" she asked herself. But in truth, I wanted to know the answer myself. I closed my eyes together, not wanting to see the same memories of Shannon trying to commit suicide.
Memories like those broke my heart all over again.
And then, I heard her footsteps. Shannon was never one to stay quiet.
"Where do you think you're going?" I harshly demanded. I watched as she instantly froze, making me feel proud that I still had that kind of effect on her.
She faced me, with that fake smile of hers. "Hello."
Um hi?
Glaring at her, I sat up. "Don't dodge the question, Shannon. You're stalling."
Shannon seemed to have glared at me as she crossed her arms in a huff. "I hate you," she whined, while I smirked and rolled my eyes. She's always going to be that stubborn person, here to make life harder than it has to be.
But I do love her.
"You can't hate what you have," I said, putting my crossed arms above my head.
She started to pout as she wonderingly looked around the room. I found it adorable, until she asked, "Is that the law now?"
All I could do was stare at her, mentally confused. After all, Shannon Abigail Glenns only talked nonsense.
"I come back from almost dying, and they're already starting new rules about hating people," she continued, growing frustrated.
In fact, I was growing frustrated as well. Yesterday's actions had me boiling over with rage at the thought of her...almost dying.
Yes, I was being selfish. But I couldn't live to deal with the fact if she left me as well.
I found myself stalking up to her until her back hit the door as she weakly looked up into my eyes. My anger must have been evident in my eyes.
Pointing a finger at her, I said, "Don't even remind me of that stunt you pulled."
She scoffed as if she found my warning ridiculous. "Remind you? I almost killed myself. I think I'm the one who's most affected in this case."
Hearing those word coming out from her mouth, pushed my anger over the limit as I started to glare at the tone she was using. It sounded as if she didn't even care.
Standing in front of her, I pushed her into the door. Shannon let out a quiet gasp, cursing at whatever seemed necessary at this point. I mentally rolled my eyes as I leaned in closer. I didn't even think she noticed how startled she looked right about now.
"Do you know how guilty I felt, Shannon?" Smiling, I watched as she shivered, staring right back at me.
"And to see you so lifeless. To see you stoop so low..." I trailed off gently. I quickly wrapped my arms around her, finding the need to be near her again. Everything about her made me feel so alive. And to see her try to inflict harm on herself, well, I just wouldn't let that happen.
I didn't care how much she was hurting. The time to cry was over. I needed to protect her, and that's all I could think about right now.
Shannon seemed to give in as if she were defeated. "What happened?" she whispered.
Reluctantly, I let go of her, staring straight into her ocean blue eyes. "Well, I called your name for hours. Mike said you would come back. But you never did."
There was a part of me that wanted to admit that I couldn't even sleep without her beside me. I thought that there was a chance that she finally walked away from...me.
And I couldn't take it.
"You tracked me down."
"I just wanted you back," I smirked easily. "I wanted to apologize for not telling you earlier. I wanted you to forgive me. And I just wanted things to go back to normal."
But I didn't even feel the slightest bit of guilt. I shook my head, knowing that I'd always love Shannon.
Shannon was pushing against me, already crying. And in that moment, I did feel sorry as I held on, too afraid to let go at this point.
"How could things go back to normal?" she demanded. "You lied to my face. I thought I could trust you..."
She trailed off as her face went blank. I hated seeing her look like this.
Out of all the seven billion people in this world, I least expected her to go through such pain and hatred. She's just so...broken.
Closing my eyes, I let out a soft sigh. "I love you. And I need you to know that I'm here for you. Please, do not do this to me. You're only torturing the both of us."
And I meant every word. If she left now, regret would fill the both of us.
"But I hate this. It's all my fault that they're dead. I waited so long for my family, only to be told that they were only ghosts. A bunch of ashes in a ruined corpse buried in dirt."
Shannon was lightly sobbing as she dramatically decided to drop to the floor. I would have rolled my eyes if it weren't for my heart clenching.
She looked tired and completely lost as I picked her up.
Gently, I set her on my bed as she was fully sobbing, pain written all over her expression. I felt slightly uncomfortable, stroking her hair as if that would soothe her.
Shannon sighed quietly and stopped crying. "I feel so dumb."
"You always say that," I complained.
Fascinated, I watched as she let out a small giggle. Damn, I missed that sound coming from her precious mouth.
"But what if I mean it this time?" she asked. Her eyebrows were slightly raised as she quickly glanced at me.
Taking in her question, I couldn't quite believe what she was saying.
It's as if all she wants is this negative energy. Doesn't she trust me to fix things?
Sighing, I said, "Well, I guess you really are dumb then. Honestly, you're one of the brightest people I have ever met. You shouldn't blame yourself, Shannon. You didn't physically kill you family, now did you?"
Knowing that she was ready to start another fight, I gestured for her to stop. "I killed my parents. I'm the one who has felt guilty for years. I killed way too many innocent people. Only I am the monster in this room."
Shannon was way too innocent compared to me. She's considered to be blameless, while all I am is a true murderer. But as time went on, I grew to accept that fact.
After a short amount of time, she put her hand on my arm, smiling at me as if she didn't care about what I just said. Feeling that same void feeling inside, I grabbed her hand, staring at our interlocked fingers.
"I don't think you're a monster."
That's all I needed to hear. But I still wanted to know something.
"Do you still love me?" I was quite surprised that I was able to get out that sentence.
She was still smiling as she answered. "I never stopped."
The light was coming into the room, making her look like an angel in the sunlight. I was finally able to smile back, pulling her closer.
All I could think about was kissing her. And that's exactly what I did.
Because I just needed her.
Yet, the same images of her leaving, wouldn't go away. I pulled away as if I'd just seen a ghost, or in this case, the memory of my girlfriend running away.
"Why did you have to go? I felt dead without you."
In the weeks that she was gone, I would barely do anything. I felt like a wandering soul that had no meaning in this life anymore.
A mix of emotions passed through Shannon's expressions. But all I could do was stare at her as she looked down and shook her head.
"I wanted to figure things out on my own."
"Like that did any good." I didn't really care if she actually heard my murmured statement or if she realized that I was being stubborn for my own good. I wanted her to know how much I missed her.
"Can we just go back?" I finally decided. "Can we move on? Forget the unacceptable?"
In my mind, I was hoping for a yes.
Surprising me, she whispered, "I don't know. I don't even know what's real and fake anymore."
Me either.
But all I did was grab her so that she was on my lap.
"Sometimes, we were born as the innocent. Known to not sin and to just play with your monster cars, and barbie dolls. But, we were really born to realize that dolls are just plastic. The flashes on the cars are going to run out of battery soon.
"And we're just still here. The real creation of the world—earth itself—was just a place to keep us steady. To keep us from floating into space, and vanishing into the one billion of stars that we admire so dearly..."
Her eyes closed for a small second as her head rested against my chest. "Congratulations. You're a poet now." And I could so badly hear her sarcasm dripping out from underneath her words.
Yeah. I knew that I think too much at times. But that's all I did as a child.
Letting out a small laugh, I gave her one of my best smiles. "Welcome back, Shannon. There's the girl I love."
She sighed before closing her eyes and falling asleep again.
~~~~~~
"I forgive you."
Even though it looked like I was sleeping, those three words played like a remix in my head. I knew that Shannon was fully awake by the way that she was secretly caressing my cheek.
She's such a tease.
Making a decision, I kissed her finger as she pulled away blushing. And Shannon normally does not blush, so of course, this came as a subtle surprise to me.
"Oh, you're awake," she lowly stated.
All I could do was nod and smirk. As much as she loved teasing me, I couldn't help but make fun of her from time to time.
"Yes," I quickly answered. But I couldn't help my wondering state of mind. "Did you really mean what you said?"
Maybe she did, but everything seemed so confusing at the moment.
Shannon softly grinned, nodding her head. "No one deserves to be alone."
Honestly, she's one of the few people who could make me laugh. And that's exactly what I did.
"It's amazing how you care about everyone. But I want to know how you're feeling. And no lies," I ordered, poking her arm.
"No lies." Yet, it seemed like a while before she could even speak again. I could see that she was struggling by the way that she was biting her lip in the cutest way possible.
"I'm not sure," she continued. "Maybe I'm angry? Confused? Hurt? And did I mention how much I hate amnesia? Should that even exist? What kind of a person am I, if I don't even remember—"
Oh, I forgot how much she loved to talk.
Before she could argue, I leaned in and pecked her lips. "Well, maybe you need to take a break from your problems. I'm sure you'll get your memories back soon."
Shannon groaned, crossing her arms as if she was more than frustrated at this point. "It's been ten years, buddy. I think those memories are long gone now."
I didn't even have time to register her words before she decided to get up and walk away.
Again? Was she trying to make me mad? Or is there something that she's not telling me?
Following behind her, she had already reached the stairs.
"Shannon, what's up? Are you angry or something?" I asked.
Clearly, I was trying to remain as calm as possible. But I think that she may have heard the fear and concern in my voice. I was worried for her...and for...us.
Shannon quickly ignored me, not even bothering to spare me a glance. "What's with everyone saying that? Clearly, we have a sky above us for a reason."
What? I decided to stop, and soon enough, she stopped as well.
Watching her, I saw that she smiled at the gang, who were currently watching a spy movie.
"They could kill the guys by lighting up fireworks."
That came from Ben. Obviously. Sometimes, I don't even bother to translate his thoughts to real English. Maybe he's just trying to be stupid?
"You really like fireworks, huh?" Shannon asked. I couldn't help but smile as Aurelia ran to hug her.
Aurelia gave me a small wink, knowing that I was hiding in the shadows like always. But she soon turned to look at Shannon, cooing softly.
"Darling, I miss you. We miss you." And the two other boys couldn't help but agree with Ari's statement.
I moved away from the hugging blondes as I went to sit down.
"I love fireworks. It all started when I lit a gang leader's warehouse with firecrackers. The look on his face was priceless when he crawled out, and then...died," Ben coughed out, frowning.
My eyes widened as I looked over to Shannon, who was awkwardly looking away. I still hated having her listen about all our killings. She just too angelic.
Well, sort of.
"That's all we wanted to hear." Mike narrowed his eyes at Ben like he usually does. But of course, Mike still treats everyone as if we're still family.
We just don't show it that much.
"I thought that was a wonderful story," Aurelia emphasized, still standing near Shannon.
"That's because you're dating him!"
This gang knows how to start a fight in a second. If I wasn't in control, we'd all either be severely injured or on the verge of dying.
"Shut up!" I shouted. Immediately, the fun fell silent as Aurelia huffed in annoyance, sitting next to Ben. But she stared at Shannon, amused, while Shannon was still standing by herself.
"Tell us, Shannon. Do you need anything?"
Shannon let out a perfect smile but acted as if she was trying to be serious. "I love cherry lollipops."
Seriously? I groaned, knowing that's all we needed. Shannon on a crazy rampage, trying to murder us all with her sugar rush.
Yeah. No, thank you.
Ben smiled at her as I sat back and watched. "We could get one off ebay." I still don't know why he's obsessed with that place.
Mike groaned. "Ebay? Isn't there like a forty cents store?"
"It's the ninety nine cents store, Mike. One cent away from a dollar. Only one." Aurelia leaned back as if she felt embarrassed for Mike. I couldn't possibly care, though.
"I'm positive you could get lollipops from the doctor's office. For free." I almost jumped in shock, finally noticing that Shannon was next to me, watching the gang with wide eyes.
How'd she do that?
But I was growing angry at the fact that the gang decided to get into another argument. Do they ever bother to listen?
Of course, they wouldn't. And that's what sent me walking over to where they were sitting and grabbing the remote, only to throw it to the floor.
"Shut up!" I repeated. I was hoping that maybe they could sense my frustration. But in truth, they were being childish. And I didn't train my gang to behave this way.
Sure, having fun is great. But I wasn't in the mood for petty little debates.
"R.I.P. remote." Ben was glancing at the floor as if Shakespeare's tragedy was written all over it.
Maybe it was just me and my anger, but I heard Shannon choking on her own laughter, practically choking.
Was I becoming as crazy as her now?
"That's the fourteenth remote you killed this month!" Mike pointed out, literally pointing at the broken remote. His hands went up in outrage. "I'm not buying a new one this time."
Aurelia was quick to join in, clearly annoyed as she stared at me. "Seriously, Blake. One day, you're going to ruin this house and we're all going to have to move to Nevada."
No, I wasn't going insane. Shannon was laughing.
I turned to see her cutely giggling at all of us, but I was more than confused by her expression.
Why? I wanted to ask.
"Is she laughing at me?" Ben turned to Aurelia, who shook her head, eyes glued on Shannon.
"You guys need to make your own reality show," Shannon finally managed to cough out. "You guys are too much."
All I was grateful for, was that she was finally laughing again. I smiled at her before I was able to fully calm down and walk over to the chair where she was trying not to fall out of. And before she could register, I sat her on my lap.
"You're making me feel like a child." Her pout was adorable. I was deadly in love with this girl.
"Well, you act like one most of the time."
"If you guys need some private time to make out—buy all means...go ahead," Aurelia lightly joked, smiling at us. She waved at me, while I growled. Aurelia sure knew how to peacefully get me irritated.
But she was my sister in a way that I could never explain to anyone. Without her, well, I wouldn't know what I would do.
"Ari," Shannon struggled to say. I ran my finger along her arm as she tried to hide her shudder. "I forgive you. I forgive all of you. And I'm sorry. None of this was any of your faults."
Mike and Ben were quick enough to gaze away from their movie. Ben was clapping. "This is amazing. We should celebrate and—"
"Oh, love! Thank you. And we send our condolences. Just know that we are here for you," Aurelia interrupted. Mike frantically nodded as I smiled, thankful to have him. I knew that he thought of Shannon as his little sister, and I was glad for that.
Shannon seemed to be the light in all our eyes. What we truly needed after all.
Sighing, I allowed Shannon to get up. While the gang immediately got distracted again, I quietly told Shannon that I was going to my office, and walked away.
Gang leaders always have some kind of work to do. That's one lesson I decided to take from the man who trained me to become who I am today.
Aiden. I practically laughed at the thought of Shannon calling him a vampire.
"Wait for me!"
Confused, I turned to see Shannon running towards me. I was set off guard as I pulled her towards me.
"What do you need, love?" I asked. But she ignored me, already skipping up the stairs. I was awed and jealous at how carefree she could be from time to time.
Then, again, her mood swings haven't been bad. Sure, she never notices that she goes from anger to tears, to laughs and fear in seconds. Yet, I loved every part of her.
"I'm trying to race you to your office. You better catch up, Blakey-boy. I just love that spinning chair of yours."
And I couldn't help but repeat the words I told her when I gave her a tour.
"Gang leaders love a good chase, baby!"
*falls off couch* It's completed!!!
Do you know how hard it is to write from a gang leader's POV? Especially one who's always angry?
Anyways...thanks for every read, vote, and comment. I guess all I have to say is that the third extra scene will be posted next Tuesday.
Early Merry Christmas to all(?)
With laughs and extra salutes,
-melodytabora <3