Ryder's POV
The airport is quite hectic this afternoon despite of the cloudy weather outside. Today I start my week worth of traveling for events and interviews. I know I should be excited because this is all I ever wanted to do but this trip could not have come at a worse time. It seems selfish leaving right now knowing that I have to be here for my dad, knowing that I have to stay with him and help him feel like he isn't alone.
"I really think I should just stay here." I say to Harry as I adjust the strap of my bag on my shoulder.
"Are you joking? You have been waiting for this for so long. It'll be silly not to take this opportunity. Besides," he says placing his hands on my upper arms. "You will do great."
I smile. "Promise me you will call?"
"Everyday." Harry says nodding in agreement. "So where are you heading off to first?"
"Paris for another Lancome event then set off to California." I reply. "Now, will you please promise me that you will look after my dad."
"I have been doing that daily for a few years now, princess." He chuckles. "But yes, I will."
"All passengers to Paris, France please report to Gate 4. Passengers to Paris report to Gate 4." A voice speaks through out the airport. I sigh.
"Okay love, email me when you get there okay?" Harry says looking back and forth between my eyes. I nod and he leans down pressing a kiss on my lips before my forehead.
Once we both say our sweet goodbyes I turn around rolling my suitcase behind me. Each step I took further away from Harry, and closer to the gate, felt like a hard one but I know it has to be done. Bucking up every strength inside me I do my best to push back my uneasiness and begin my journey.
The hotel that I have been booked at is very vast and beautiful. The room was a bit chilly when I got here, in all it's white and cream colored glory, so I turned on the heater after I took a shower to feel a bit better after a long trip. Stepping out the back door and onto the balcony, my eyes widen, feeling blown away by having the view of the Eiffel Tower so close. It looked absolutely breathtaking.
The night was seemed bleak; there are not that many noticeable stars in the sky but I believe it has to do with the many amounts of city lights. Looking out at the sight in front of me somehow made me at ease, made me feel warm and happy despite the cool breeze blowing.
Suddenly, ringing from my laptop back inside my room broke me from the calming spell. Turning around I quickly jog back inside over to the four post bed where my MacBook sat open in the middle above the white sheets. Sitting on the edge I turn the laptop towards me and see Harry's name popping up on the screen. Smiling, I place my index finger on the mouse pad and accept the video call.
"Hey Princess." Harry grins, his face popping up on the screen.
"Hi." I smile back. "What are you up to?"
"Just got home from work. Wanted to check up on you." He replies and I watch as I see his phone shifts a little as he sits down on the bed.
"I'm good." I nod. "How was my dad today?"
"Busy with work but he seems to be holding up." He replies, reaching a hand up to his neck to losen his tie.
"Did you catch any bad guys today?"
"No, luckily today was calming. Normally when they call us lately there has been a murder so it's good that things have stopped."
I bite my lip and despite of my debate of asking the question I do anyways.
"Why do you do it Harry?"
"Do what?"
"Your job." I specify. "I mean your off your anklet now. Why did you stay? What makes you feel obligated that you have to find The Sinister?
Harry eyes shift downward as he bites his lips into a line in thought.
"Because someone has to." Harry shrugs his eyes soft.
His response makes me feel in awe of him, so proud that he cares so much and that he is trying to be a better man, but for some reason I have a gut feeling that there is something more. However, I don't press on the subject further because I feel like this is something that has to be spoken about in person so instead we exchanged our love and goodbyes for the night.
As much as I try to sleep I can't. My head is whirling with ideas of what my dad could be doing right now and how alone he must feel in that huge house. I should be there for him just like he has for me.
I sigh while closing my eyes feeling a headache coming on. Shifting, I roll onto my side and curl up into a ball determining myself to get some sleep because tomorrow I have an early call.
After waking up at five a.m the rest of the morning luckily swooped by. I had a few meetings with Lancôme talking about the next campaign and releases and now I'm at the airport waiting for my flight to California to be called. It's about two in the afternoon and I am starting to feel the lack of sleep from last night starting to crash over me. The only thing that I feel that is pushing me to move on is that if I get through this day it's another day closer to being back home. If my dad has been able to push through so many obstacles for me then so can I.
The sun in Los Angeles brighten up my stressful mood, also the two hour nap I took before coming to my shoot. I am doing a collaboration with an upcoming clothing line that is all about showing that every body shape is beautiful and owning your quirks.
So far, I have already worn three different outfits. Right now, I am wearing a black bralette with matching panties and an white shirt hanging open over my body.
"Okay Ryder, now that all the photos have been taken for the ads I would please like you to go over to this side of the studio please." Taylor, the photo director, instructed me as she lead me over to the far right corner.
The area was still surrounded with white studio lights but the wall was decorated as if it belonged in a cozy apartment, with a few potted green plants on the right and a small clothes rack, filled with a few outfits on the left.
"This is for the small video ad. It will just be a small montage of you dancing." Taylor says looking at me with bright green eyes, while talking with her hands. "So we will record you dancing in a few more outfits and in the end we will edit and mash it all together."
"Sounds like fun." I state, which was true. I feel like I need to find a way to just let loose and distract my mind, dancing seems like the perfect fit.
"Alright well lets get started." Taylor smiles and I give her another nod before walking over to where I was told to be. One of the crew member started the song on a sound system a few feet away and I let myself go. I recognized the song it's one of my favorites; Bad Habit by the Kooks.
Starting off I started gently rocking back and forth taking a few steps along with the beat but as soon as the chorus started I loosened up a bit more; twirling around and looking over my shoulder while puckering my lips into a kiss. Taylor let out a small laugh as she continued to record me.
"Yes babe, just have fun." She encourage making me smile, hiding my face in my hand.
Once I was done with that outfit I was told to change out of the white shirt and into a pair of denim overalls with short sleeves. This time around I decided to do a bit of more cheeky shots while playing with the zipper that ran down the front of my chest slowly revealing the black bralette underneath.
"What dessert do you find sexy?" Taylor asks me, after a while, from her list of questions as she follows me around the room with an old video camera; making the film appear black and white.
It is just the two of us left in the studio and right now I'm just chilling in the same black bralette and panties as before but had an open pink silk robe over me.
"Hmmm, whip cream or chocolate." I reply glancing over my shoulder as I continued to walk slow steps forward. The floorboard felt cold beneath my feet but it was refreshing.
"The first person that you found sexy?"
"My boyfriend." I say turning around, nervously holding my hand behind my back, blushing at the camera.
"Awe," Taylor smile while slightly adjusting the focus on the camera.
"What advice do you give to girls who are desperately trying to change themselves?"
"I would advice them not to." I say shaking my head, while pushing my curled hair behind my ear. "I've come to realize that the quirky things that make you different are the things that make you beautiful. No two people are the same and they shouldn't be the same. We are all unique and I think we should all learn to embrace that."
"Sexiest thing you find in a person?" Taylor asks, glancing up at me looking away from the view finder of the camera.
"Hmmm," I bite my lips in thought trying to pick out something from Harry since he is the one my mind keeps running too.
"Tattoos," I finally answer. "Tattoos are sexy, they add a bit of mystery and art to a person. Plus it's another thing that makes someone stand out from others."
"When do you feel sexy the most?"
"When...I have a pair of booty shorts on and one of my boyfriends's t-shirts and just...kinda walking around the house." I shrug, biting my lip to hide my grin.
After taking a quick lunch break once everything was done for the shoot, I changed back into the black dress that I wore when I came in. Grabbing my purse and my coat by one of the chairs alongside the wall of windows, I glance out and see the beautiful afternoon with the warm sun shinning through making the room seem a bit brighter.
"Hey Taylor?" I call out looking over my shoulder.
"Yeah?" She asks, looking up from her set up on a large white table.
"Would you mind taking a picture of me with my cell?"
"Sure." She smiles kindly making her way over to me.
"Thank you." I mutter as I hand her my phone right after I set my stuff back down on the chair.
Walking over to the windows, I reach my hands up to my hair to rack my fingers through it to catch any lose strands that might be out of place. Once I feel satisfied I move to step up on the white ledge with my cream colored heels, slightly pressing my hands up against the window as I gaze outside.
"Lift your chin up just a little babe so the light can hit it." Taylor instructs standing a few paces away. I do as I'm told and after a few seconds I hear the snap of the camera.
"There you go babe." She says and I smile turning around and stepping off the edge.
"Thank you." I reply reaching out for my phone before leaning over and giving her a hug. "Thank you for this opportunity."
"No thank you.You are an extraordinary person to work with."
Once back at the hotel I changed out of my black dress and into more warm and comfortable clothing; a pair of grey sweatpants, a white knitwear sweater and a beanie. Adjusting myself comfortably under the white sheets, I lean back into the pillows and begin to type out a text to Harry with my cell already at hand.
To:Harry
Hey sexy ;) Miss you! Love you!xx
From: Harry
Me, sexy? Baby, have you looked into a mirror? Miss you more! Love you more! xx
To:Harry
Yes very very sexy... and desirable.
From:Harry
Hmmm, you are very lucky you are far away or else I would show you just how sexy and desirable I can be. *smirk*
My eyes widen as I read over his words, a smile stretching across my lips.
To:Harry
Mr. Styles I am shocked! Have you no shame at all for your dirty thoughts?
From: Harry
Shame? For wanting to cherish my beguiling girlfriend? No way. Dirty thoughts? I never mentioned any dirty thoughts but are you intrigued to know because I would glady give you a very detailed explanation.
I giggle
To: Harry
How about you show me when I get home?
From:Harry
Looking forward to it. I'll be waiting in torturous anticipation. ;)
James' POV
It's been five days since Ryder has been gone and away on her trip. I am immensely proud of her and happy that she is doing what she loves. She deserves to be happy after all the badness that I have brought to her.
"James!" Harry says roughly opening my office door. I immediacy glance up from my laptop and frown at him, blinking at his unexpected visit.
"What? What the matter?" I ask as he quickly walks over with a small manilla file in his hand.
"I just got-" Harry starts to say but is interrupted by ringing coming from my laptop. I look at the screen and see Ryder's name waiting for me to accept the video call.
"Wait one sec. Ryder is calling me."
"No James, this is about Ry-"
"Hey sweetheart," I say accepting the call. "How are-"
"I don't want to get on the plane." She interrupted, her voice wavering and I can tell she is on the verge of tears, making my whole body begin to feel washed over by anxiety.
"Baby what's wrong?" I ask.
"I don't want to get on the plane back to New York." She whimpers, her eyes glossy with tears. "I want to go home. I don't want to be here."
"I want to go home. I want to be there with you." She says letting out a choked sob before hiding her face behind her hand, with the sleeve of her baggy sweatshirt.
What is happening? Is she not having fun in her trip? Did someone offend her? If that's the case then I swear...
"No Ry, don't cry. It's okay sweetie." I say in a soft voice trying to calm her down.
"Please dad. I just want to go home. Please."
I sigh. "Sweetie, don't worry about me I-" I stop when Harry waves his hand at me calling my attention.
"Let her come home." He mouths and I furrow my brows, and give into his request.
"Okay Ryder, don't get on the plane to New York. I'll call Hannah to cancel the rest of the events," I say reaching over picking up the phone off the receiver. "Go ahead and get a flight home."
"Okay." She sniffs.
"I love you Ryder. We will see you soon."
She nods. " 'kay, love you. Tell Harry I love him too."
"I will." I nod before she hung up. I sigh, pondering what has Ryder so upset before focusing back on Harry.
"So what did you want to tell me?Why do you want her to come home?" I ask Harry, glancing back up at him as he stood towering over me on the other side of my desk.
"I want her to come home so we can keep an eye on her."
"What? Why?"
Harry says nothing but simply opens the small file in his hand before roughly tossing it on my desk. My brows furrow as I glance down at its contents and my heart stops completely, feeling like the world beneath me has shifted and I'm diving into one of my worst nightmares.
Harry's POV
I watch as James looks down at the file I set down on his desk. Immediately his lips part before his head jerks up at me, his brown eyes wide like a deer in headlights.
"Harry, what-"
"I'm sorry." I breathe shaking my head. "Trust me this is the last thing I wanted. This-"
"Harry do you realize what is happening!" he suddenly exclaims while quickly standing from his chair. "Do you realize what this means? How could this happen?"
I open my mouth and shut it again, letting out a breath while looking down at the floor, not sure what to say.
James lets out a sigh, tilting his head back as he turns to face the wall of windows, racking both of his hands through his hair.
"What are we going to do?" He mutters, sounding defeated.
"It'll be okay James. For now all we need to worry about is when Ryder is coming home."
Ryder's POV
I feel absolutely terrible as I walk through the airport; now back in London. I feel so embarrassed that I had to call my dad crying over video chat cause I could no longer handle being away from home. Being away from home this long, espeicially after Martha left, put me on edge. For some reason I feel distant from my dad, I started to feel like I wasn't going to see him again but I also felt worried and stressed wondering about how he was doing.
I know I acted like it didn't bother me that Martha left, that she didn't matter to me, but it does. Her leaving brought all of the memories of when my mom left me; I was alone and I feel alone now. I feel scared and all I want is my dad. All I want is to hug him and be with him because I don't want him to disappear too.
I walk through the automatic doors of the airport building out into the chilly breeze. My hair blew back along with each side of my open blue jacket. My feet quickly started to feel cold at my poor choice of wearing black heels then a pair of boots, but right now that didn't matter to me. Glancing around the many cars lines up against the sidewalk by the entrance I scan for Harry's black charger but I don't see it.
"Ryder," My dad's voice calls out. I turn my head and see him a few feet away standing by his car.
"Dad," I whimper quickly jog my way over to him tugging my suitcase along with me. He opens his arms out wide for me just as I relase the handle of my suitcase and slam myself into his chest and begin to cry.
"Shh, I've you. I'm here." He says tightening his hold around me kissing the top of my head, before smoothing out my hair, swaying us gently side to side. "I'm right here."
"Where is Harry?" I ask glancing over to my dad, who was currently driving us to his house. Subtly, he shifts a little in his seat.
"He had some work to do but he will meet us at the house later."
"Oh," I mutter before turning my head looking out the window.
My dad's house was quiet, of course it would be, but it was a bit unsettling. As nice as the house is, now that there is only one person living in it, it feels quite enormous and vacant.
Sitting on one of the bar stools in the kitchen, I keep my gaze on my mug filled with hot chocolate as my dad silently puts the few dishes that he just washed back away in the cabinets. Ever since we got back we have not really said anything and getting tired of the tension I decide to speak.
"Are you disspointed in me?" I mumble, gently turning my mug around in a circle with my fingers.
"What?" My dad asks setting the dish cloth down by the sink, turning around to face me. "Why do you say that?"
"Because I came home earlier than I was suppose to." I reply, my voice sounding a bit shaky and I honestly have no idea why. I feel scared and I have no clue what is causing it. Maybe I am just stressed.
"No I am not disappointed in you. Don't you ever think that." He says gazing down at me with soft blue eyes. "But why did you come home? Was it because of me?"
I stay quiet biting on my lower lip, looking down at my mug again.
"Ryder," My dad half sighs. "Why? I told you I was fine."
"Well I'm glad you're fine but I'm not." I snap and he blinks at me, puzzled.
"What? Why-"
"How can you say you are fine dad?" I ask, interrupting him. "How can you say you are okay when your wife walked out on you? How can you say you are fine when you are all alone in this house? How can you say you are fine when my mom left you alone and with a kid?"
My dad closes his eyes for moment. "Ryder your mom..." He pauses. "She wasn't happy. She was tired of struggling by and she didn't feel like she could raise a child."
"Oh and you could?" I scowl, tears stinging in my eyes. My heart drops when I see my dad bite the inside of his cheek, looking hurt.
"I didn't mean it like that dad." I mutter.
"This...this just isn't fair." I say, looking down, letting my shoulder sag in defeat. "They left, they didn't want us. They didn't want me and... and now all I have is you. All I had back then was you and I have been such a complete nightmare."
"I have been so hostile towards you when you were hurting. You were hurting and you have been trying your best to give me everything and I have just been tossing that away like it's nothing!" I say waving my hand out.
"They left and what will stop you from leaving too? I don't understand why you haven't. I mean I-"
"Hey, Hey, Ry calm down." My dad frowns quickly walking towards me as I begin to sob, tears blurring my vison. I stand and he pulls me into his chest as I wrap my arms around his neck.
"I don't want to loose you daddy. You're all I have left." I cry, as I grab at the material on the back of his shirt, hiding my face in his neck.
"You won't. I'm not leaving you." He says and I could feel him shaking his head. Gently he pulls away to gaze down at me,resting his hands against my cheeks.
"No more crying honey. Please." He mutters, wipping my tears away. "Everthing will be okay. I'll always be here, nothing on this Earth is going to make me leave you. Do you understand?"
I nod wiping my nose with the back of my sleeve.
Harry's POV
This morning James' picked me up from my house so we could go out and question a few crime witnesses so I had to catch a cab when I left the office to his place. Seeing Ryder made me feel a bit less anxious and worried but the feeling is still there. During our dinner it took everything in me to pretend that everything was okay but I managed. Right now, Ryder is not in a good place and telling her what happened today will only make it worse.
The faint rain falling outside made such a soothing nose as James drives us home, so soothing in fact that Ryder fell asleep beside me. I had my arm wrapped around her, while she rested her head on my shoulder. I divert my eyes to James and see him looking at me through the rearview mirror.
"We will figure this out." I say to James before looking away and turning my head pressing a kiss on Ryder's head.
Author's Note:
Hey my loves! How are all of you doing?
What do you think of this update? What do you think of Ryder coming back home? What do you think Harry and James are keeping away from Ryder?
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this, let alone my story. Love you all so much, the feedback I have been getting is incredible! Ah!! Love you!!!!!