You were embarrassed to admit it, but you had a problem. And why you didn't think of this for the past nine months is a mystery to you. However, you weren't completely alone. Erik had the same problem.
Neither one of you knew how to take care of a baby.
The next day, after you had given birth to Haru, you and Erik were woken up to the sound of a high pitched cry. In the same room as you, a few feet from the bed, was Haru who was crying in the crib that Mira bought for you.
However, you had no idea what to do.
"E-Erik," You stuttered, standing over Haru's crib. "what do I do?"
"How should I know?" He responded, sitting up in bed and running a hand through his bed head.
"You made him!" You exclaimed, looking over your shoulder at him.
"So did you." He also pointed out.
"Well, if you had put on a freakin' condom, then we wouldn't be in this situation."
"I-I was . . . i-in the moment." Your husband tried to defend himself, his cheeks turning red.
"You could've pulled out."
"D-Don't blame this on me! I-If you weren't being so cute, I could've controlled myself!"
"I AM NOT CUTE!" You shouted at him, but your loud voice only made Haru cry more.
You turned your attention from Erik to Haru, picking up the small child in your arms. "Why are you crying?" You mumbled, talking to the baby as if he could answer.
"Maybe he wants something." Erik suggested.
"Like what?" You turned around to face him, holding Haru close to you.
Erik just looked at you for a moment and then he smirked. "Like that." He said, pointing at his son.
You looked down, confused, and saw Haru's tiny hand clawing at your breasts. "I see." You mumbled, moving to sit on the bed.
As if you were alone in the bedroom, you removed your right arm from your shirt and set your right breast free from the clutches of the bra you were wearing. Erik stared at you in awe. S-She has no shame whatsoever. He thought. However, he quickly got over his amazement and started to become tempted by your sudden exposure of skin.
Haru quickly latched his mouth around your nipple, thoroughly enjoying himself as he was fed.
You felt someone's eyes watching you, and since your husband was the only other person in the room, it wasn't hard to figure out who it was.
"Is there a problem, Erik?" You asked, turning your head to look at him.
"You're too tempting." He replied with a smirk.
"I'm feeding our son. How is that tempting?"
"Just the mere sight of your boobs is tempting."
"Please refrain from using adult vocabulary in front of a child." You scolded.
"Yes, mom." Erik teased, getting off the bed and leaving the room to go to the kitchen.
Another Two Years Later . . .
"He's so adorable!" Erza sighed, a light blush on her cheeks as she watched a two year old Haru crawl around the guild.
Over the past two years, you and Erik have learned a lot about raising a baby.
Sleepless nights.
Countless diaper changes.
Sore nipples (Haru has a strong grip).
While you cared for your son, you were becoming irritated. And Erik could tell.
And apparently, so could Mirajane.
"You look tired, Toxin." She commented, drying a glass with a cloth.
"I am." You stated with slight growl. You haven't had a decent sleep or nap in what felt like forever, not to mention some alone time. Your eyes were burning, almost dry, begging to be closed and rested.
"Maybe you and Cobra should take some time off." She suggested.
"But then who would watch Haru?" You asked. You thought about Racer, Hoteye, and Midnight, but the three of them left on a job yesterday.
"I'll do it." A deep voice offered. You looked to your left and saw Laxus standing there. As soon as you looked at him, he tensed up and looked away from you, a pink blush on his cheeks. "I-If that's ok with you." He stuttered.
Relieved, you opened your mouth to say yes, but your husband cut you off.
"No." Erik answered.
You looked back at the tanned male. "Why not?" You asked.
"Are you serious?" He asked in disbelief, raising an eyebrow. "Have you forgotten, (Y/N)? He likes you! I don't want him watching Haru!"
You sighed, annoyed with the man that you married. "What does him liking me have to do with Haru? And besides, I'm already married to you and I gave birth to your child. I think his chances of being with me are destroyed."
Laxus was hurt by your harsh words, but you didn't notice it. Erik, on the other hand, was quiet since everything you said was true.
"Fine." Your husband grumbled. Then he looked at Laxus. "You can watch Haru." He said, though he didn't sound happy to say it.
Laxus nodded and went back to go sit with his team.
"You hurt his feelings, you know." Mira spoke up after Laxus was gone.
"Huh?" You were confused.
"Stating that Laxus had no chance with you." She explained. "Yeah, it's true, but saying it so bluntly was a little mean."
"Oh." That was all you could say. Were you really that harsh with your words?
Suddenly, Erik grabbed your wrist and pulled you toward the exit. "Hey, Lightning Man, you better take care of my boy while we're gone!" He shouted as you two exited Fairy Tail.
"Where are we going?" You asked.
"Home."
"Home?"
"Yeah." Erik suddenly stopped walking, turned to face you, and pulled you close to him. He wrapped his arms around your waist and smirked at you. "We're going home to be alone," His hands slid down an squeezed your butt, "and do adult things."
You looked at him unimpressed. "Do you really think that we're going to have sex again and risk having another baby?"
"I'll use protection this time, I promise!" He grinned, becoming excited.
You raised an eyebrow at him, unsure if he'd actually remember or not. But his eyes pleaded with you. You hung your head and sighed, "Ok, I'll allow it."
"Great!" The grin stayed in his face as he picked you up and carried you bridal style all the way back to your house.
An Hour Later . . .
Your chest rose and fell rapidly, trying to regain control of your breathing. You stared up at the ceiling, shifting slightly in bed.
And that was when you felt it.
You felt something against your bare leg and so you reached under the covers to grab it.
In your hand, there was an unopened condom.
"Erik," You growled his name, feeling the anger within you rise.
"Hmm?" He hummed, still in his state of bliss.
"Did you use a condom?"
He stiffened in bed, snapping out of bliss and into reality. He panicked, Crap!
Seriously, would you ever be able to tame this 'snake boy' as everybody calls him? He was able to shatter the ice around your heart, which you are now grateful for. And everyone was surprised to see that Cobra had a soft side.
But only towards you.
That's why he only allows you to call him by his real name. And vise versa with you. You loved him, but he could seriously piss you off at times; like right now.
But don't you think that since Cobra is Snake Boy, that it's only natural to give his wife a nickname too?
Congratulations, you're the Snake Charmer! 🐍
-THE END-