"Feeling better now?" He says stepping closer.
Weird. I totally forgot about him being here.
"Yeah, I think I'm better now." I mumble as I look at myself. "I should get changed, I'm covered in liquid dumbness."
He lets out a chuckle "Yeah I probably shouldn't have let you do that while wearing your maid outfit. Blood is really hard to wash out."
"No kidding." I reply in a duh tone.
"Yeah throw it away, I'll get you a new one."
I blankly stare at him and nod my head "By the way... what are you doing with that body?"
He tilds Jeffs head slightly to theside looking at the body "Normally I'd say I drink the rest of the blood and then get rid of the body But I'd rather die than having hisblood tuching my fangs. Which means I'll go out. I'll be back in a moment though."
"Alright. Can you bring me to my room, please?" I ask nicely.
"Sure. Hold on tight." He says walking over to me. He wraps his arms around my body and I do the same. I close my eyes and once I open them again I already am back in my room. "Well. I'll go now. See you in abit."
"Yeah." I mumble to myself.
Once I hear my door closing I open my dress, letting it fall off my body. I take off my shoes and socks and untie my hair while walking inside my bathroom.
Not bothering to look at myself in the mirror I directly step under the shower and turn it on. I let the water dripping down my body and just stand there for a while, thinking about what just happened.
I kiled him
I killed a human being
He was a monster.
But it was a human being!
I'm a monster.
But why don't I feel sorry? I feel bad but for the wrong reasons. I should feel bad for killing someone but instead I feel bad for not feeling bad. What the hell is wrong with me?
You.are.not.normal.
Well duh. But what actually is wrong with me? I am neither a psychopath nor a socioath. If I fitted in one of these categories I would at least know what is wrong with me. I could at least feel a little normal. But like this? I'm just a weird who knows what whith a secound voice in her head that doesn't feel bad for killing a human being.
But still... I thought about killing someone a lot of times before. I kept fantazing about the sickest shit and yet... now that I finally did it I just feel numb. Empty inside. I feel and think so much for not reacting the right way that I just block it away. Leaving me numb. Not feeling at all. And that creeps me out even more.
I want to freak out. I want to scream and cry and admit that what I did was horrible but yet I can't. My body wouldn't allow me doing so. I feel like being trapped and yet I feel free.
I can't stand this weird feeling anymore.
I take some soap and start cleaning away the only evidence left. Now I only have to throw away the dress and everything will be like it always have been.
I wonder if that actually is a good thing...
Turning off the shower and steping outside I wrap a towel around my body, walking back to my room.
"Back already?" I state. I walk over to my closet and grab a dress. I let my towel drop to the ground, not caring at all that he might be watching me. I put on the dress and sit down on my bed right next to John.
"We need to talk."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Hey<3
Hope you like the new chapter :)
I know I said I wanted to make it about John but it kinda diddn't work xD
But I have to ask you something.
Do you want me to write in John's pov too? I diddn't plan on doing so but if you want me to I can do that too.