I felt the heat escape my body; it was like my veins contained ice rather than blood. My heart started pounding inside my chest and my knees began to tremble. I must have heard him wrong, maybe he'd said something totally unrelated. I gulped as I willed myself to ask him to repeat himself.
"Come again?"
In a voice softer than I could have ever imagined coming from him, Zach spoke the words I just realized I never wanted to hear.
"We're going to meet someone who might know where Olivia is." He looked at me to gauge my reaction and I had no idea what expression my face carried at the moment. Was I happy, relieved, scared or angry? Did I want to see the woman who had ruined so many lives and however unintentionally had destroyed mine the most? Why was Zach doing this? He had lost as much as I had but did he still love her? My heart ached at how selfish I was being. How could I think about myself when this man in front of me deserved to get all the answers that he wanted? My sister had broken his heart, she'd broken and crushed his soul and robbed him of the desire to love, and the least he deserved was to hear from her own mouth why she did that to him.
"How...how do you know this?" I asked quietly as I stood in front of the door.
"This man called me a few days ago; he said he had some information for me and that if I didn't come see him he'd go to the press with it," he said all of this like it wasn't a big deal, like things like this happened on a regular basis. His voice had become cold again, detached, and I didn't like it one bit.
Zach rang the bell before I could say or ask anything. Almost immediately my hand reached for his, a way of my body telling me that I wasn't ready for this. He gazed at my hand, tightly clasping his and he must've understood my state of mind since he didn't let go. Our breaths came out in puffs of smoke as we stood there, waiting for someone to let us in. I was trembling from head to foot, my flimsy sweater no match for the freezing cold of New York. Zach pulled off his jacket and wrapped it around my shoulders. I looked at him gratefully but couldn't hold his gaze for long. The strong emotion in them was starting to scare me.
We got buzzed in and entered the building hand in hand. The walls were yellowing with paint peeling off all over. Water seeped onto the floor from the cracks and there was a rancid smell about the place. A metal stairway led to the upper floor and it creaked beneath our feet as Zach led me to it. Honestly I never wanted the staircase to end; if it ended I'd have to face the truth, and that I didn't want to have to do. I was eighteen years old but I'd gone through more than any normal eighteen-year-old could ever imagine going through and it seemed like the problems never ended. I'd gotten used to my life but it was like someone was constantly reminding me that I'd never find peace in the life I'd been forced to choose.
We walked down a dingy corridor with a stained carpet lining the floor. The occasional drunkard stumbled out from the rooms and I found myself pressed firmly against Zach's side. His protectiveness had obviously heightened since the incident at the airport and for the first time I was glad I had someone to save me. I never allowed Noah to fight my battles for me; I wasn't a damsel in distress and I didn't need someone to be my hero but I was grateful for Zach's presence.
We came to a halt outside a room labeled 405. Loud music vibrated through the doors and reverberated in my chest. By now a knot of tension had formed in my stomach and was constantly making my fists clench in pain. What if Olivia was inside...?
Zach knocked firmly on the door and we waited with bated breath. I dared not look at him and he was avoiding looking directly at me. I knew my nails were digging into his palms but I couldn't let go of his hand. It just wasn't possible for me in the moment.
The door opened slightly and a foot popped out the small creak that opened up. The foot led to a leg covered by ripped jeans. I followed the trail to find a somewhat familiar face grinning at us.
Nick. I took one look at his face and my heart stopped. She couldn't have, she couldn't possibly have done this.
"Are you alright little Ari, you look like you've just seen a ghost," he said in a snarky voice and the hair at the back of neck stood up. I had never liked him, not since I'd caught him and my sister in her room and now this guy could potentially break Zach more than the damage my sister had already done. I was scared for him, I wanted to protect him but I knew it was too late. Had I known it was Nick we were coming to meet, I'd never have let him enter the building in the first place.
"You know him?" Zach focused his attention on me and gripped my hand more tightly.
"Unfortunately yes, he was my piano teacher," I said, glaring at the man clad in a leather jacket.
"You always were my favourite student but it was always your sister who interested me," he sneered and I felt my lunch coming back up.
"You talk only to me, do you understand that? Stay away from her!" Zack growled and pushed me behind him. I clung to his shirt and resisted the urge to bury my head in the crook of his neck. What had my sister done?
Nick waltzed into his apartment and we followed. Immediately my throat started burning due to the strong stench of alcohol. The place screamed of Nick, it was dirty and disgusting. Leftover pizza boxes, dozens of beer bottles, official letters strewn all over the place with an inch of dust covering everything. His place truly reflected the kind of man he was.
"Did you bring the money?" Nick asked Zach as he made himself comfortable on his own couch.
Next to me, I felt Zach's entire body turn rigid and his free hand curled up into a fist. I knew he wouldn't lose control though, that wasn't who he was.
"Yes I did but I need you to tell me what you know first," he answered him in an icy tone.
"What do you want to know first, rich boy? How about I tell how your fiancé came running to me on her wedding day, begging me to take her away. Or I could tell you how she had me sell her engagement ring to get tickets for the both of us to leave the city."
The tension in the room was palatable, the silence so deafening that it could drive a normal person insane. Blood rushed to my head, making it pound hard. Was he telling the truth? My mind refused to believe him but my heart told me that he was right. Things that I'd overlooked in the past now came rushing back to mind. Olivia had started acting strangely on the days before the wedding and I'd just attributed it to nerves. Never could I have imagined that she'd let her crush on my music teacher ruin her life.
"Stop it Nick! Just tell him what he needs to know!" I screamed at him, finally finding my voice. I knew I had to protect Zach as much as I could.
"Not until I get my money sweetheart," he replied, making my skin crawl.
I looked over to Zach and the picture of his face broke my heart all over again. His face had lost its entire colour and his head was bowed in defeat. His eyes were dead, stone cold and far off. A vein pulsed in his neck and his hand held mine in a death grip.
"Zach, give him his money, he'll tell us where she is and we can get the hell out of here," I said quickly, looking at him and making sure he was still listening to me.
Zach took out a check from a pocket in his jeans and threw it towards Nick who grabbed it greedily.
"Keep it; I don't need to know anything else," he said in a voice lacking any emotion and hurried out of there, leaving me behind with an overjoyed looking Nick who couldn't take his eyes off the check.
"Did she even remotely regret doing what she did?" I asked him quietly.
"No Ari, honestly she didn't. She was just glad to be rid of you all," he replied and for once a look of pity crossed his features and I was reminded of the music teacher who'd made me love music so much.
Without saying another word I left him behind in his apartment, my heart sinking with every step I took towards Zach. I had no idea how I was going to handle this but I had to be strong enough for the both of us.
I found him collapsed against the railing of the staircase with his head in his hands. I sat down next to him and rested my hand on his shoulder. I felt him tense under my touch but he didn't shrug my hand away.
"She's not worth the pain Zach," I said softly and I heard his breathing quicken next to mine.
"She never loved me did she?" he choked out in a broken voice and it felt like my heart was being weighed down by an anchor the size of the Titanic.
"I'm sure she did, Zach. She just got scared and ran but that doesn't mean she didn't love you."
"You didn't run Arianna; you didn't leave me that day," he said and looked up, his eyes burning into mine.
"I...I..." I was lost in the power of his eyes holding mine as if life itself depended on them.
He moved his face near mine, inching his lips closer and closer to mine and for the tenth time tonight my heart began wildly crashing inside my chest. Instinctively I closed my eyes and allowed myself to succumb to my senses. I breathed in the smell of his cologne and welcomed the heat from his body.
"Open your eyes Ari," he whispered and I felt his breath fan my face.
I followed his instruction and opened my eyes to see his face only a hair's width away from mine. What was he waiting for? I almost wanted to grab his shirt and close the gap between us.
His lips travelled to my ear and I shuddered at the contact.
He gently trailed his lips down my neck. I arched my body towards him as a moan left my lips.
Zach pulled back and put some space between us. The lack of contact was like an attack of cold water over my senses and my brain finally kicked in. What the hell was I doing?
Zach got up and held out his hand to me. I got up on my own and stood at an awkward distance from him. He sighed as he neared me and took my hands in his.
"I'm sorry I brought you here, I guess I knew I'd need the support," he said softly and brought our hands level with our faces.
"It's okay, I'm glad you made me come. I'm glad that I could be there for you," I replied shyly and god knows what possessed me to do what I did next. I freed my hands from his and wrapped them tightly around his waist. For a moment Zach's body reflected his surprise over my actions but that quickly gave way to his emotions. He buried his head in my shoulder and brought his arms around me.
At that moment I didn't feel lost. At that moment, I thought I'd found a home.