I spent the rest of the weekend at home, buried under blankets and stuffing my mouth full of anything sweet I could actually find. Mary Jane had stayed with me, busily tidying up after my mess of candy wrappers and empty containers of ice-cream. She was being very patient and hadn't uttered one word about what had happened at Harry's Halloween party, even though I knew it was on her mind.
"We're out of Nutella," I pointed out half way through Sunday afternoon. My parents had been and gone, actually spending nearly a full twelve hours at home before heading back to the labs. My father had been the one to speak to me softly while I was pretending to be asleep. I had always just assumed he was the tougher one, the strong and silent type. But in the early hours of the morning, I heard his whispers of comfort, love and support. Those short sentences had brought on a fresh wave of tears which were soaked up with my pillow.
Mary Jane glanced up from her place on my reading chair, her socked feet tossed over the arm rest, my laptop sitting on her knees. We had been spending most of the day cooped up in my room, listening to old records and watching silly cat videos. She had somehow made that weight in my chest fade a little, just by being with me. Maybe she had been right all along, maybe with people around things didn't have to turn so dark sometimes. "That's because you've been spoon feeding it to yourself for a solid three hours."
I pushed away the empty container, licking the spoon clean. "I couldn't help it. Do you want to venture out and get some more?"
She gave me a little look, almost a pout. "I will," She nodded after a moment, pushing away my laptop and dropping her feet onto the floor. Her red hair was pulled into a pony tail, her pearly white skin on full display. Even from here I could see the splash of freakles on the bridge of her nose, usually covered with makeup. "But first, let's talk about last night."
"Really?" I groaned, flopping back down on my bed and burying my head under my covers. I heard her move from my reading chair and join me on the bed. I waited for a moment before cracking open an eye and seeing her laying right next to me, her eyes full of concern. "Then you'll get me more Nutella?"
Mary Jane nodded, crossing her heart. "I promise on my life."
I knew the subject of last night wasn't something I was escaping from, not with Mary Jane hovering over me all weekend. I usually hated the hovering but not currently, it was nice to have her around. "I promised Colton when I was ten that I would never let a boy take what was mine, that I would be smart with my heart. In a sense, he was just being a big brother and overly protective. He watched me sink my science experiment at that fair, letting Peter win. I was just a kid and thought Peter was cute. It was so silly and I had never thought I would ever have to keep that promise..." My voice broke off, a familiar weight resting on my chest like it did everytime I spoke about Colton.
"Then Colton was killed," Mary Jane finished off quietly. "And you thought by honouring him you would stay true to that promise you made when you were ten." It was a statement, one she must have worked out between my sobs last night at the bottom of the staircase.
I gave her a little nod, brushing away a tear that had leaked from the corner of my eye. "I know what happened was an accident, I really do. But sometimes, I can't help but blame myself. We were fighting that night in the car over something so stupid. I just thought...I could keep him here." I pressed a hand to my heart. "By trying to live the life he wanted me to have. To be clever, to be strong and not to let Peter Parker win."
Mary Jane shifted on my pillow, letting her head rest on her hand. "That's why you always wanted to beat Pete with everything. That's why you never liked him."
"It's so stupid," I admitted. "By promising Colton, I made myself hate Peter." I flicked my eyes away from her as my chin wobbled with another wave of emotion. "But I don't want to hate him, Mary Jane."
She leaned in closer, taking my hand softly. "You do not have to, Flo. You made that promise a long time ago, it was something I am sure Colton never wanted you to stay true to. He wanted you to be clever, never to put your heart in front of your goals. He would never want you to live a life where you got so low at times, where you had to hate a boy that only ever wanted to be your friend."
Tears dotted my eyesight and I gripped onto her tiny hand, feeling my chest break. Colton had been my best friend for a long time. He had been there when I needed him mostly, always trying to protect me from things I didn't understand at the time. He was my brother and I missed him every single day, every time I closed my eyes I saw him smiling and making me promise to be smarter than he ever was. "You are clever, Florence. You are strong. You are everything and so much more than Colton would have wanted you to be." Mary Jane went on. "Your brother would want you to be happy, not to be like this."
I nodded, blinking back tears, giving her a tiny nod of my head. Mary Jane wasn't the perfect picture of clever, she was a different clever to me. Where I was book smart, she was world smart. She knew things, felt things that I could never imagine. She saw a different world to me. Where I saw numbers and calculations she saw dreams and colours. She was my opposite, but I needed her when she was so right about something.
"Are you happy?" Mary Jane asked slowly, giving my hand a little squeeze.
I let my eyes snake up to watch her. "I'm happy when I'm with my parents. I'm happy when I'm with you and Gwen, even Harry." I paused, feeling my heart start to thump wildly in my chest. "I think I can be happy when I'm around him."
Those words that I had never wanted to admit slipped out. For years I had built up my walls from Peter Parker, creating a false sense of hate all because I was scared. All because my brother had died and I was too afraid to let him go and let myself grow without him.
Mary Jane's kind face lit up, a rare brilliant smile resting on her lips. Suddenly, she was scooting off the bed and tugging on some boots. I sat up, the blankets falling from my shoulders. "Where are you going?"
She turned back to me, giving me a wink. "I'm getting you another container of Nutella."
I felt a smile twist my lips upwards and watched as she grabbed her coat and disappeared out of my bedroom door. I waited till the front door was slammed shut before throwing off my blankets and heading towards my desk where a picture was framed of myself and Colton. It was taken only a few years ago, my cheeks still chubby and his blue eyes shining bright. I took the frame in my hands, my tears drying on my cheeks now. "I am smart, I am clever. I am everything you wanted me to be. I will be happy." I told the picture of him. I promised that to him, wherever he was now, that I was going to be happy, however long that took.
***
That night after a long needed bubble bath, I got dressed into some sweat pants and pulled out my homework. It was just past seven o'clock at night and since I hadn't completed any of my homework from the pervious week, I needed to get that done. I twirled around on the spot, trying to locate my laptop and found it where Mary Jane had left it on my reading chair. I grabbed it and let it wake back up and found a recent video she had been watching online. Without thinking I clicked it, wondering if she had been filling up our afternoon watching some stupid video about cats again. But as the video played, it wasn't cats but was of some masked figure climbing up buildings. The video was shaky but I heard the comments of awe and wonder in the background. When it ended, I watched it again and again. It seemed nearly impossible that someone wearing a ridiculous mask and matching tights was climbing buildings in New York City. I opened a search bar, wanting more information when I heard the familiar ding of the doorbell.
I pushed away my laptop and hurried downstairs. I yanked open the door, finding four smiling faces. "What are you all doing here?" I asked my friends, a little embarrassed I had been caught in my pink and grey sweats pants and a shirt with a cartoon cat printed on it.
Harry almost burst out laughing as I let the four of them wander into my house, completely uninvited. "Cute sweats, I'm surprised it doesn't spell princess across your ass or something."
I gave him a quick glare, "I'm glad to see the real Harry Osborn is back."
"You can't get rid of me that easily," He grinned, dropping to the lounge in my living room and kicking his feet up. Mary Jane plopped down next to him, sending a quick smile in my direction. Gwen showed me a collection of her favourite films and I suddenly knew why they were all here.
It was Peter that was still waiting in the threshold, a little unsure. I knew we had left things beyond strange and knew there were a few things we needed to talk about but right now, all I wanted was to spend time with a group of people that wanted to be around me. "Are you coming in or what, Parker?"
Peter gave me a little smile and shuffled in, the door closing shut behind him. We stood in my tiny hallway, just off to the side of the lounge room. I could hear the others chatting away, trying to decide which film to watch. "How are you doing?" He asked quietly, tucking his hands into his pockets and swaying on his feet.
I curled some hair behind an ear, giving a little shrug. "I'm going to be alright. What about you?"
He gave a little nod. "Me too."
There we stood, two kids who had been through hell and were just trying to mend something within the both of us. Something we had lost, something that had been broken. Our wounds were old and new, some faded and some deep but maybe together we could fix each other. "About the other night..." I started slowly and lamely.
Peter shook his head, "Hey, it's alright. We don't need to--"
I butted in. "We do. We do need to talk about it. I want to." It might of been one of the most honest things I had ever said to Peter Parker. "But, maybe tomorrow."
His lips turned up into a small smile, one that was starting to grow on me without me even realising it. "Okay, tomorrow it is."
We filed into the living room, sitting down on opposite sides of the lounge. Enough time had passed that the conversation had switched, Harry had pulled out his phone and was showing Mary Jane something, Gwen peering over her shoulder. "I saw this the other day!" She exclaimed.
I inched closer, trying to get a look at his tiny screen. "What is it?"
Harry looked up at me, giving a smirk. "It's New York City's new masked boy."
"He climbs walls," Mary Jane added in. "And uses this strange web thing or something to fly through the streets."
I thought back to the video I had just spent almost ten minutes watching. I pushed myself upwards, getting a better look at the video playing on Harry's phone. Sure enough, there he was. The person dressed in red and blue, his face hidden and swinging from whatever that webbing stuff was.
"He's wearing tights," Harry chuckled out.
Gwen hit him lightly across the chest. "It's clearly a onesie."
"Maybe he's the new Iron Man," Mary Jane pointed out. "He's stringing up criminals."
Harry shook his head. "Maybe but the way he's scaling those buildings, that's not humanly possible."
"Maybe he's an alien." I added in for good measure.
Mary Jane was smiling, enjoying this too. "Or maybe he's been experimented on like Captain America." Ever since The Avengers had made their big debut, the world had known all about heroes that wore masks. It wasn't something new, not by a long shot but it was kind of interesting to have a home grown masked man running around our hallowed streets.
"What do you think, Pete?" Harry asked and that's when I noticed Peter hadn't uttered a single word ever since Harry had started playing the video on his phone. Peter had always been interested in heroes, what kid wasn't these days?
He shifted awkwardly in his seat, trying hard not to look directly at the video. "I don't know. He's just some random guy that wears a mask, nothing new."
Harry laughed, "You're right about that one, Pete."
I smiled, watching them argue back and forth about this new masked person swinging through the streets of New York. This was what I needed, this was what made me happy. I just needed to find a way to hold onto this for as long as possible.
AUTHOR'S NOTE:
How did you all like it? I feel like this chapter was a bit iffy compared to last, but oh well. Also the amazing mood board way above was created by the lovely perfectlystiles, check her out guys, she's super chill and golden. Thank you all for reading and supporting the story as always. Please leave your wonderful thoughts below.
-tinkertaydust