26 - Not A Damsel

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Over the last few days I had come to the ultimate conclusion that boys were just as confusing as girls. Even though I had been spending an overwhelming amount of time with Peter and I just assumed the relationship was forming, or growing in some ways. Since we had not even had a friendship since now, it was definitely in the forming stage. But ever since standing on my porch that night, letting his words warm my soul nothing had remotely happened. 

When the timing is right, we'll have our moment.

I don't know about you, but I've been waiting a while for that perfect moment and thus far, nothing. I had spent most afternoons cooped up in his box of a bedroom, sitting crosslegged in jeans with my textbook in my lap with him only inches away from me. I had patiently let him watch me as I nibbled on my bottom lip, reading page after page of notes. I did not know why taking our time in getting to know each other and to simply hang out was actually was slowly driving me insane. This was Peter Parker, the boy I had mostly hated growing up. The boy who glanced at me when he didn't think I was looking and quietly smiled to himself. The very boy that always bailed on plans but would lean in close and tuck some stray hair behind my ear and grin like an idiot and everything would be alright again. This was the boy who I had wanted to kiss since Halloween and I didn't know why. 

Well, I knew why.

Hormones, mostly. 

But it was more than that, I could feel it in my bones. Somehow, over this short amount of time Peter had worked his way into my mind, creating this space where when I wasn't with him, I wished I was. He had practically made my mind boy crazy and I didn't like that. I also didn't like the fact that our moment was taking forever to get here. 

"You know," Gwen was saying one late afternoon in the New York library, her voice lowered as a librarian wandered pass, shooting us glares. "You could just kiss Pete." She was grinning, her dark hair falling in her eyes as she looked up from her stack of magazines. We had been in the library all afternoon and well into the twilight hours of the night. She had practically begged to tag along as I searched through the stacks of books for research for my Ancient History assignment. I sent her a quick horrified look with her statement. 

She rolled her pretty eyes across at me. "It is the modern times, Flo. You don't have to wait by the phone for him to call or be a pretty little lady and wait for him to make a move. Just take his face and kiss him, it's not that hard."

I flipped a textbook closed, my pen threaded behind my ear. I knew speaking with Gwen about boys was a no brainer. Mary Jane always had good advice but she lacked in the boy knowledge department, like myself. Gwen, however was our boy guru. "I know I could..." I let my sentence drop off. 

"But what?" Gwen insisted. "Do you honestly think he wouldn't kiss you back?"

I stayed very quiet and that gave her my answer. Gwen started laughing quietly. "Come on, Flo. It's Pete we're talking about. He's a boy, that's all they think about. Plus, he is too polite, even if he didn't want to kiss you he would let you and then make some excuse that he other plans he couldn't miss and rush off. He's too nice to outrightly reject you." She watched as my face fell. "Not that he would ever do that. That boy is head over heels for you. Trust me."

I wanted to believe her and mostly, I knew she was telling the truth. Peter was an open book most of the time and I wasn't completely oblivious to the fact that he would choose to share a notebook when studying so he could sit right next to me. I didn't miss the little hints; how his hand lingered a little longer on my arm, or how he smiled when he saw me standing in the doorway for class. But something deep down had me worried that maybe it was all in my head. That this thing we had between us was one sided. 

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