Dedicated to her because she's my other buddy :)
P.s I love you all <3
Jeydon's POV
I slowly walked down the stairs to see my brother and his best friend playing Modern Warfare 3 on the Xbox. They were both yelling at the television. I seriously don't understand why people like that game. All you do is go around shooting people. Poising your mind with Violence.
I turned around but was stopped by my brothers voice. "Jeydon. What I'm hearing. Is this true?" he asked, pausing his game. I don't know if I should be scared or happy that he paused his game for me.
"What have you been hearing?" I ask, hoping it wasn't what I think it was.
"That you're a fucking fag. Tell me it isn't true."
"I'm not a cigarette Declan. I am me. I am your brother."
"Don't get smart with me Jeydon. Give me an answer."
"Yes. I am a homosexual." I answer and he clenched his fist.
"Well, when were you planning to tell me?"
"I don't know."
"How long?"
"A while."
Then the doorbell rang. Saved by the bell. "You,"he pointed to me. "Don't go anywhere."
"You can't leave me here with Corbin!" I say and my brother shook his head and walked to the door. Leaving me alone. With Corbin. Great. He's a freaking creeper. I'm terrified of him. I might have had a crush on him but he is scary. Or what my mother would say, the devil.
Corbin looked me up and down and licked his lips. "You finally came out. Maybe I will too. Then We can be together."
"There will never be an us. I thought I told you to leave me alone." I say getting up from my seat.
"How can I stay away from someone precious as you? You have to admit, we had a great time that night."
"How can you call that great? You ruined me." I say and he chuckled. I use to like that chuckle.
Corbin is like my brother, but worse. He likes to torture people. He likes to hear them scream. Beg for mercy. But this isn't about him. Well, sort of, but that will come later. Right now I just want to get away from him.
What is taking my brother so long. I really want to get this over with. "You know, I've always had a thing for you Jey."
"That's what you said before." I say clenching my fists.
Declan walked in with boxes of pizza. I licked my lips and inhaled the smell. Declan set the boxes on the table and I grabbed the paper plates. Corbin took his seat and I made my plate and his. "Could you go make Corbin a plate? I got to call-"
"Whatever." I say placing the pizza on Corbin's plate. I set his plate in front of him and smiled. I hope he chokes.
***
I sat down on the couch and sighed as the boys played their game. How serious are they about this stuff? It's only fake. Nothing about that game is real. It's just a bunch of baloney.
"You're going to tell mom and dad, right?" my brother asked.
"I don't know. They wont have to know. I don't want to hear their rant about how it is a sin to be gay. I really don't think I can tolerate all that." I tell him and he nodded and then shouts at the screen. "What would they do if they found out I was a homosexual?"
"I have no idea Jeydon. Listen, I'll be there fro you when-IF- you tell them. I'd never let my brother face them alone. I don't want you to get hurt."
"Declan?"
"Yeah?"
"Are you ashamed of me?"
"Why would you think that?"
"I don't know. I read stories and some siblings are ashamed of having a gay brother." I say with a sigh.
"Those stories are fiction. Don't worry. You're my brother no matter what. Even if you're gay or not." He said shouting again but used profanity as well. It's just a game. Get over it. You'll come back to life again.
I stared up at the ceiling. I could feel Corbin's eyes just staring right at me. Burning deep into my skin. I can just shiver staring at him. I'm scared.I need to get out of this room.
"What's wrong Jeydon?" Corbin asked with a smirk. I scowled.
"DUDE! You shot me! I'm on your fucking team." my brother yelled.
"It's just a game." I scoffed and made my way up the steps and into my room. I decided to go take a shower and just think about things. I'll feel much better afterwards.
***
I got out of the shower and threw on my boxers. I grabbed my cellphone off of my bed and saw that I had no texts or calls. I frowned. I was really hoping for a text from Zane. I don't know if I should text him or call him. Would he think I'm weird? I don't want him to think I'm a crazy stalker or anything.
Maybe I can text him goodnight or something. No. That might be uncomfortable for him. We aren't even that close.
I scrolled down my contacts list and clicked on his name.
Me: hey
Zane: whats up?
Me: Just wanted to say goodnight.
Zane: That's so sweet of you. Goodnight cutiex
Me: Night.
I set my phone down beside me and smiled. He called me cutie and added an x at the end. That must mean something. Right? I mean he could be Bi. Yeah right. There will never be an us. But who knows. I may get lucky.
I lied down and closed my eyes.
Flashback
"You know, I've always had a little crush on you." Corbin told me. I smiled.
"Really?"
"Of course. I'll even prove it to you." he said licking his lips.
"How?"
"Just sit down on the bed and relax." he told me and kissed my neck. I shivered from his touch. He started kissing up my cheek and then he took my shirt off. He roamed his hands all over my chest and kissed my abs.
Corbin started nibbling on my ear and tugged on my belt loops and pulled my pants down. Something in my mind told me to push him away, I tried, but he was stronger than me. "Corbin, I'm not ready for this." I tell him.
He looked into my eyes and forwned. "I was trying to prove that i've like you for a while." he said and I shook me head.
"I'm only 15 Corbin. I'm not even ready for sex." I tell him and he rolled his eyes.
"Jeydon, I just want us to be happy."
"I am happy. I have you now."
"But I'm not happy."
"But-" He cut me off by pulling my boxers off and turned me on my stomach.
"Let's to it."
"No."
"Why? Don't you love me?"
"Love and liking someone is a completely different thing."
"I have caught you staring at me every once in a while. You don't have to hide your true feelings." he says taking his clothes off. I covered myself with the covers but he pulled them off. I screamed.
Please don't let him hurt me. Please. Someone help me.
Corbin placed his hands on my waist and kissed my cheek. "It's going to hurt just a bit." he whispered in my ear.
I cried for my brother to walk inside and pull him off of me. I cried for my brother to be there for me. But he't not here. He had to go to a football practice and Corbin had to watch over me. I begged for him to stop but he covered my mouth. When will this pain end?
End of Flashback
Sometimes I think bad things happen for a reason. I know I'll have to move on but those memories still haunt me. I always lock my door whenever he's over. After that night he'd come in and get in the bed with me. He would touch me and play with my hair but wouldn't go further than that but I was afraid that he would do it again.
I closed my eyes and heard the door creak open...