Song: Broken Crown by Mumford & Sons
"Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell."
― Edna St. Vincent Millay
Jace's POV:
I was alone. Shepard had not spoken to me since I had muttered the words to his mate. She was not our mate. She was his mate. I hated her. She was the reason I did not have a family. I knew it the moment that I had smelled her scent, though my body had been too paralyzed with ecstasy to realize it.
Her name confirmed her murderous and coldblooded ways. I would never be able to love someone like her. Destroying and hurting people was her family's way of life. She knew no other way as I was sure that she had a cruel upbringing. It would be as if I were betraying my own blood if I were to mate with a woman who belonged to the family that had brought my pack so close to extinction.
Shepard had almost caused me to shift involuntarily as he wanted to mate with her. The brokenness of his mate's face had crushed him. He wanted nothing more than to heal her. He wanted her, though I had no remorse for my actions. I valued my family too much, even if they were dead.
I did not let the bond affect me as I refused to become attached. I had sent troops to search for my sister each day, but they had yet to find her. I was angry with Shepard that he preferred his mate over our own sister.
"She's our mate. We will be lost without her. I will die without her," Shepard snarled, inputting his opinion.
"She's your mate, not mine," I answered.
He didn't respond; instead, he blocked me out. Earlier, I had fled from the battle along with my pack when I smelled Mason and his pack nearing. He knew that I would be fighting the Greer colony and he was going to assist them, instead of his own kind.
He was not a purebred, so it would make sense as to why he would betray us. I knew he didn't plan on killing me as it would be foolish for him to expose himself before such a large amount of influential people. I'm sure he had other ideas to kill me quietly.
Images flashed in my head of her lying on the ground, nearing unconsciousness as my wolves ripped her flesh open. I knew she would not heal and just the thought of her dead sent me into a blind agony. It was the bond that still connected to me her.
My pack had a low count of deaths, but many had been injured. I was informed that the reason why the Greer colony had suffered so much was because their leader had been so weak. I caused her to be weak, but I had to tell myself that I didn't care.
"Alpha, there's been a problem," Alex notified me.
Alex fell in stride beside me as we walked back to my office after training the pups.
"Theodore has disappeared."
Those three words had me bounding. I raced towards the barracks which some of my best troops would be training. Alex gripped my arm, yanking me back. I almost had his head for daring to touch me, but he released his grasp and spoke in a rush,
"The pack has decided that since you have... rejected your mate. She, uh, needs a replacement."
Shepard growled so loud that an instant headache started to form. Of course I had known that I would need to have a Luna some day, but it felt so soon. It felt like the moment after a funeral where nothing quite made sense. There wasn't any closure.
Mute, I nodded before rubbing a hand across my face.
Alex turned swiftly around before muttering about needing to be somewhere. Once I had found enough of my fighters to assist me in making a couple rounds to find Theo, I left with them in suit. I turned towards my fighters and instructed,
"Wait here. I will be back soon. I have to find someone who might know more about this before we leave."
They nodded before conversing amongst themselves. I raced towards the closest pack houses, hoping that she would be there. I needed to speak with Stella before we left. I wondered where she went wrong with keeping track of the boy. I noticed her short blonde hair bobbing amongst the people in the den of the house.
She smelled me at once and turned, meeting my gaze. Her face was familiar and reminded me of family. Her features were creased with worry and immediately I knew she was not at blame for Theo's disappearance.
She ran up to me and embraced me tightly. The hug caught me off guard as I returned it, though I was not as enthused as she was. Shepard growled menacingly in the back of my throat - the sound of a male who had found his mate. Her eyes dropped to the ground guiltily. I almost reached out to her, but something inside me thought better of it.
"Jace, you have to know that I did not mean for Theodore to captured, but he just ran off with the other children and they were playing after you and the pack returned. I thought it was okay because he was finally making friends of his age and they accepted him," Stella rambled on.
I was not very happy about her regarding me with my name rather than my title, but I let it slide for the time being. She remained strong as she met my gaze once more.
"Captured? I was not told that he was taken," I stated, confused.
Stella nodded her head,
"Yes. I went out looking for him once the other children had returned, but he was nowhere to be found. I could only smell him slightly and even that was faint. I smelled another scent, one that I had not smelled before, but it was very distinct."
"Will you come with me and help me search for him?" I asked.
"Of course. It would be the least I could do."
I escaped the bustling about of the pack house with Stella close on my heels. I knew that rumors would spread that I had already moved on from rejecting my 'mate,' but I hoped Stella would remain the friend she was when we were younger. I slowed my pace.
"Sorry," Stella wheezed while placing her hands on her knees, attempting to catch her breath.
"We'll set a slower pace once we get in the forest," I said, secretly wishing that I had had the incentive before to train her myself.
I stood gazing across my territory until I saw Bauer racing towards me. Stella stood up, readying herself before saying,
"Ready to go?"
I shook my head as Bauer approached us. He glanced between Stella and me before he leaned towards my ear.
"Alpha, we need to speak about the Luna initiation once you return," Bauer whispered.
"Shut the hell up. I don't want to hear about it again," I snapped.
Bauer raised his eyebrows, placing his hands in front of me in submission. I glared at him as I realized that my fighters were behind me and snickered behind us. I shot them each a scowl before bounding into the forest.
We split up and I opted to search only with Stella. Shepard snarled, not liking the proximity to an unmated she wolf who wasn't our mate. Two of my wolves went north, two to the east, and I chose to cover the west and south with Stella. They were not in favor of this as I knew I was starting to receive distrust from my people considering I had rejected her, but they would not want a vampire to be their Luna. I knew what was best for them.
We traveled in silence along the shadowed forest that reeked of life and prosperity. I sniffed the air, hoping to smell Theodore, but his scent was nowhere near us.
We went beyond my territory, venturing into another pack's, praying that they would not be making rounds as well, but the attempt of finding Theo seemed futile.
"Is it true?" Stella softly spoke, shattering the comfortable silence.
I snapped my head towards her as I hoped she did not want to know information about the battle, but I was proven to be wrong.
"That you rejected your mate?"
"She's not my mate," I growled.
Stella bowed her head in submission. Rose would not have submitted so easily without putting up a fight. Why did I care? And why did the thought of her fighting me arouse me?
We continued to walk, searching every crevice of the forest until I felt too guilty to continue walking. I stopped under a huge tree that had twisted roots that wove over the ground and large limbs that stretched for several meters before colliding with another tree. Stella looked back questioningly at me before taking a few strides in my direction.
"What are you doing?" She asked warily.
"I didn't mean to be short with you earlier," I semi-apologized. Shepard could not have cared less.
"It's all right. It's a touchy subject. I should not have brought it up."
"No, you should know the truth."
She nodded, encouraging me to continue.
"Do you remember what happened to my parents?" I asked.
"They passed when we were young."
"They were murdered by vampires."
"I don't understand. What does that have to do with you finding your mate?"
"Not my mate," I corrected. "I found her at the war."
Realization dawned on Stella as she connected the dots of why I rejected her. I refused to call her by her name.
"Plus, I could never have a vampire as Luna of my pack."
"Are you sure that was a wise decision? Won't your wolf now be unsatisfied for the rest of your life?" Stella inquired.
"No, not if we find another woman to become Luna," I said, taking a step towards her.
Her innocent, doe eyes widened at my movement. She took a step back from me. I continued to stalk her until I cornered her into a tree. Thoughts of finding Theodore vanished as my eyes darkened. I pressed my body to hers and her breathing fanned my face. I leaned my head to hers and brought her lips to mine in a feverish kiss. I dominated the kiss as it became hungry and desperate.
"The fuck are you doing? You will kill me. You are so fucking selfish, you traitorous bastard," Shepard snarled at me and punished me with the overwhelming remembrance of the way her jasmine and citrus scent was my personal drug.
I ignored Shepard's protests as I slid my lips down Stella's jaw and her neck. I caressed the spot that her mate would when he marked her. It didn't feel right. It felt like I was burning myself from the inside out. How could this happen when I rejected her?
A shiver raced through her body and I grinned at the effect that I had on her. She ran her hands through my hair, tugging on the strands. A moan escaped her lips as I bit lightly, teasing the skin on her neck.
"You would make a great Luna. Would you be mine?" The words felt poisonous on my tongue.
Stella looked taken aback as I glanced towards her swollen, pink lips. I awaited her answer. Excitement crossed her features as she gave me a quick peck on the lips.
"Yes, I have always loved you since we were pups," she murmured.
"I won't help you ever again. Watch me die, asshole."
I picked her up, embracing her small frame. A scream pierced through the air. We broke apart, suddenly alert as we raced towards the sound. Although I had no choice, but to slow down for Stella as she was already winded, I couldn't help thinking about the decision that I made.
I grabbed Stella's hand, yanking her with me. We reached the edge of my territory, cascading with memories of the moments in the valley the prior day.
Stella stood, catching her breath as I wandered further to the line dividing the different territories. I did not notice another scent. I noticed a small note attached to a tattered shirt that belonged to Theo. The note read:
"I take your pack members better than I take rejection."
I did not believe that Rose had captured Theo, espeically since I assumed that she was dead considering where I left her. My soul felt as though it were being speared at the thought of Rose by herself, let alone dead. I knew somewhere deep inside she wasn't dead. I would be in a hell of a lot more pain if she was considering that she never repeated the rejection back to me.
Stella was a distraction. I pictured her face whenever I touched or looked at Stella. She could not divert my attention forever.
"Reality's a bitch."
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