Joshua's POV
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My crazy thought haunts me for days, thinking of what I should do to make this right but at the same time keeping a good distance away from this problem.
It's not that I don't care about Jungah missing and all but it's about being too attached to her, the boys love her so much they now would constantly leave her voicemails or ask her whereabouts to mom and dad, it kinda irks me seeing they care more about my sister than I do.
Yes, deep down I finally accept that she's my sister but her causing this much ruckus to the boys made me keep my own mind to myself, I wouldn't say anything to anyone and didn't seem to care about me at the moment.
Dongjae had grown used to it now, he'd constantly ask about Jungah but when the boys answered that they don't know he'd just nod, not a frown nor a small pout, just a nod before he continue what he was doing.
Eversince my relationship and the boys became drifted, I've been watching them from afar to see what they're like under this kind of pressure; what I've seen so far is not good, there would be some constant scolding from S.Coups telling the boys (especially the maknaes) to drop their phones and practice, he once almost literally drag Dino by his hoodie to the practice room, there would also be bickers of where could Jungah possibly be and that fight would be stopped by Woozi voluntarily, nothing is peaceful in the dorm.
Everyone being stressed is nothing compared to what Vernon and Mingyu is going through, mom took Dongjae with her so that Dongjae wouldn't be a bother to us, Vernon and Mingyu was near mad when she did but with a lot and I mean A LOT of persuassion the two eventually let him off half-heartedly.
I remembered Dongjae crying loudly when mom carried him away from Mingyu, I've heard that he doesn't have a dad and Mingyu has been the best dad to him so far. It must be hard for them to let each other go.
"Hyung..." someone called from the door softly, I was lying on my bed doing absolutely nothing, I turn and saw Dino standing with a smile on his face, "what is it?" I asked, "your mom's here, she brought Dongjae along with her" he said then fled.
I was confused, why did she come? Nevertheless I went out to greet her.
It was true what Dino said, mom brought Dongjae to the dorm, he was immediately being kidnapped by the other boys without thinking twice, "Josh! You're finally out of your room! Vernon told me you've been spending quite some times in that room" mom said while chuckling to herself, "I've been out a couple times mom... I still have work..." I sighed and sat down in front of mom.
She smiled at me, but her smile showed slight sadness, she put her hand on top of mine, "it must've been hard for you to accept this easily... I'm so sorry honey..." she frowned.
I didn't answer anything, mom sighed then looked down to her lap, "your sister... she really wanted to tell you, but hearing that you think that she's only your imagination discouraged her more than anything... I remembered the first day she came into your dorm... she called me and ask why you didn't remember her... after hearing my story, she suddenly became gloomy-it was obvious in her voice-it saddens me thinking how heartbroken she was... thankfully she didn't give up that easily..." then she halt into a stop.
I thought she was done talking and I was about to open my mouth to utter a protest when suddenly she gripped my hand hard, "Joshua... y-you need to know..." she was still keeping her head down, "what? What is it?" I asked softly, confused at her sudden reaction, "J-Jungah... she w-went through a lot last year..." that's when i realized that mom was crying, her voice cracked and when she looked up her eyes were red and droplets of tears decend from her eyes.
"What do you mean?" I asked, not knowing what she meant by that, "Y-You have another sister-an older sister to be prescise... she died a week before your sister came to me... w-which is two weeks before s-she came to Korea... your eldest sister sent her here to find you... Jungah told me everything" then she burst out to a loud howling cry, "not only that, but she gave up her dream to become a professional dancer to work 3 jobs a day to pay for your sister's hospital bills... you should know how harsh she lived with your aunt... she even left Dongjae here and ran off with some guy" mom chuckled darkly before wiping the tears in her eyes away.
I was shocked at this point, I didn't know that Jungah went through a lot, she went through something that a girl her age shouldn't experience, "I-I... I didn't knew that... she d-didn't tell me anything..." I croacked as I furrowed my eyebrows, "come to think of it... she never told me anything... a-all I did was push her away and not care for her at all..." tears started to well up in my eyes, "oh God... what have I done? How could I?" My tears drop as I close my eyes while thinking about how bad I was to my own little sister.
Mom then stood up, "well, I should be going... I'll leave Dongjae here and I'll pick him up again tomorrow morning..." she said.
There was a pause.
Neither of us let out a sound, not even a sigh.
But then mom suddenly pat my head, "don't think of it as your fault Josh... it's common for someone to experience this... though I'm not sure how many cases were there about things like this..." then she left, the boys bid her goodbye when she passed them.
I felt like as if my soul left my body that moment, I didn't feel like myself.
"Jisoo? What are you doing here?" S.Coups asked as he sit in front of me, "I-I-I-" "is it about Jungah?" He cut me off, I look at him and nod slowly, "Coups... how can I be so mean to my own sister? How can I?" My body was trembling and I was near on crying my eyes out.
S.Coups sighed, "come on Josh... don't be like this... Jungah would blame herself knowing that you're like this" he said, "H-have we found her?" I asked, ignoring what S.Coups said, "no... not yet... her number is still the same but she won't pick up..." he said with a small smile on his face.
Without letting him continue, I stood up and walk to my room and laid on the bed while staring at the wood plank above me.
Then something caught my eye, an envelope was slipped between two wood planks, it was peeking out and I reach out to take it from between the planks.
To : Joshua Hong
I carefully and slowly open the envelope and took out the letter inside,
' Dear Joshua Hong
It's been a long time, Josh!
Remember me? I'm your noona!
By the time you read this I'm affraid I'll be somewhere far away, and this also means that Jungah told you everything just like how I instructed her to.
Aren't we lucky to have such sister like her? She's an angel...
She's very prescious
And very fragile
She has a weak heart so she'll often be emotional, because that's just what she's like...
Which is why I need you to promise me...
Promise me that you won't leave our sister alone...
I won't be able to be by her side and all she have left is you.
I know I'm asking a lot but she's been imagining to have a brother for 15 years.
I know that you're a big hit now and is probably too busy to even take care of yourself but please, as Jungah's only sibling, be there for her...
I'm so proud of you Josh
You made everyone so proud...
I love you little brother
Don't forget me, okay?
-Your Noona '
At the end of the letter, I was weeping, I crumple the piece of paper and hold it close to my heart, "I'm sorry noona... I'm so sorry..." I muttered continuously while sobbing like crazy.
I wept for half an hour before calming down, I sighed and sat straight on my bed with my head hung low, "I need a breather" I mumblef to myself.
The members saw me going out but didn't ask where I'm going to, maybe they knew that I need some time outside the dorm alone to walk any anger out of me. The letter from noona is in my pocket, I kept it in my palm because I was affraid that I'd lose it.
I kept walking untill I discover myself near NU'EST sunbae's apartment complex, I furrowed my eyebrows and sighed, "how did I walk this far without realizing it?" I muttered in annoyment while ruffling my hair frustratedly.
Looking around, I was hoping that no one noticed me because I'm an idol but thank God the streets were empty and only a few people pass by.
From the corner of my eye I could see a small cafe, it looks tempting so I went in and order myself a cup of americano, I brought it out with me to the table outside.
The cold wind made me shiver, but it didn't made me feel cold at all.
All I did was stare soullessly at the people passing by, some were couples, some were a group of students and some were siblings, they'd hold each other's hands as the older one spoil the younger one with no second thought. Which made me took the letter out of my pocket and re-read the whole letter again and again.
Tears were starting to form again in my eyes and I quickly wipe them off, not wanting the public to see a man crying outside a cafe, looks pretty pathetic, huh?
But as I put my arms down, I saw a figure leaving the convenience store just accross the cafe.
That figure looks very familiar but her hair looks unfamiliar, she was walking while looking down because she was putting her change into her wallet so I didn't quite see who she is.
She was holding bags of plastics filled with what could be groceries ( and probably is ) and she was wearing a cream coat, her hair was hazelnut brown with pink ombre at the end.
When she looked up, I was beyond shocked.
"Isn't that...
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Jungah.... ?"
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HELLO!!!!!
OHMYGOD IDK WHY I'M SO HYPER
BUT I'VE FINISHED MIDTERM EXAM!!!!!
YAAAAAAY!!!!
9 DAYS WITHOUT SCHOOL !!!!!!!!!
ㅋㅋㅋㅋ
How's the story so far??
Btw I'm making a new story !!
Do you guys like NU'EST??
It's a fantasy titled 'The Queen's Knights'
And yes, it's inspired by NU'EST's recent comeback song; Overcome (which literally translated to The Queen's knight)
Anywho!!
Don't forget to comment, vote and follow me !!
I hope you guys are enjoying!!
See ya all in the next chapter ~~
-Nana 🌸