Nik
His amused questioning look was on the verge of turning into frustration. At the same time, that question in my head started to scream louder and louder: ‘Why was I doing this?’. And yet my grip on his shirt was kept tightened.
“Let go, Nik.”
Why did I lose control? I should’ve walked away or something but when I saw him with Rina, her cheeks flushed red, I just …
“I said,” he started as his hands came up, “let go.”
In movies, they’d show this guy pushed up against the wall thought ‘enough is enough’ and decided to show who the boss is, easily letting himself free. Well, he tried that.
Tried.
Finally, Steve started making some efforts to really stop this instead of just using words as I felt him try to pull me back. But I didn’t’ budge. My gaze on Ian didn’t waver, either.
“What are you doing here, McGovern? Huh. What are you up to?”
Steve’s hands weakened. Seems he wanted to know that as much as I did, even though this wasn’t a question to which an easy answer was likely.
His eyes narrowed, his face instead of going off in anger remained smug and in this overly shocked voice, Ian said, “McGovern?”
“Just answer the damn question.” The words came out in an angry growl and the smirk on his face only grew even more pleased at this.
“May I be free?” His gaze following a passer-by, he asked gesturing towards my arms. He was lucky the corridor was somewhat empty since the bell had rang moments ago. Otherwise, this’d been pretty pride-hurting for him.
When no reply came from me, Steve added with a small sigh.
“Let him go first, Nik.”
A few more seconds of useless staring passed before I let him go and stepped back.
We watched in silent disbelief at how drastic someone could change over the course of just nearly two years. There was not a slightest trace of that boy I’d grown up with in this guy straightening his shirt in front of me.
And he surprised me even more. “Look at you, all grown up. Marilyn would be so proud of you.”
“Man,” If mom’s name coming out of that hole hadn’t left me too murderous to notice other things, I would’ve been surprised at how menacingly calm my reply followed, “trust me, you don’t’ wanna go there.”
My still-best friend stepped in between us. “Now’s not the best time to talk, come on, Ian.”
I managed to keep the gaze steady on the guy even with Steve’s back blocking me from him. But he didn’t respond with nothing other an amused smirk. Then something changed that look: something resembling realization.
“You were rather fine and nervous the other day. Why suddenly all angsty, and still nervous?” He took a step forward even as Steve tried to hold him off and said in this know-it-all air, “Don’t tell me it’s Rina.”
Even though I didn’t look it, something heavy inside me dropped, bringing my stomach down along with it. He can’t know how I feel about her!
It’s not like I myself even knew how I feel about her, but that’s another story.
Steve then cut in and scolded in this All Mother voice he’s always had, “Enough, both of you!”
But he was right. I’d had enough.
“Just stay out of my way, Ian.”
“Maybe,” He didn’t exactly push off Steve but did exert enough force to get out of his hold, “if you stay away from her.”
This guy really knows how to push my buttons.
“No, Ian. You don’t understand.”
“Steve, don’t! We’ll see who gets there in the end.”
I didn’t even know why I said that. But one thing I knew: it felt so right saying that.
“What the hell does that even mean?” was Steve’s surprised reply as he suddenly turned back to me. I didn’t care what he thought, though, at the moment.
Glancing between us, confusion did begin to fill Ian’s eyes but bastard didn’t lose his annoying demeanor.
“Yeah, we’ll see,” came the cocky challenge from Ian.
I didn’t mean to but with unnecessary force jerked away Steve’s hand as I stormed off, fuming.
The more corners I’d turned and the further the distance my feet carried me away from him, the more I came to realize walking away wasn’t doing anything to help put down the beast inside me running stark mad with rage.
I needed to see anguish breaking out on his face. And I needed to be the cause of that.
And also on the face of whoever did that to her!
How startled they looked when I slammed the door open and burst into the bathroom, I didn’t care to see. Well, I couldn’t see really, since my vision went blur the moment I saw her hand dripping with blood. Okay, not dripping but redness surely coated both of her hands good.
“Who the f*ck did this?” Before I knew it, I was already standing over both of them, inches away from taking her arm off myself to check it.
“I’m not…,”
“It’s not her blood,” I turned to Elizabeth’s voice and found a look of annoyance on her face.
Her words entered my ears no sooner than my hand grabbed Rina’s hand to make sure she was telling the truth.
She was. And the lump blocking my airway finally removed itself, letting me breathe again. And I eventually managed to bridle my most unstable state of mind and let go of Rina, and took a step back.
“So you’re not hurt or anything?” There was a nod and a small pleased smile on her flushed face. “Then what happened?”
“There was a fight and she obviously didn’t fail to have the big heart to help whoever in it,”
“Why are you answering everything I ask her? It’s not like I’m talking to you.”
Alright, now, that was just meant as an playful insult of course but what’d happened with Ian earlier, and now with her, hadn’t exactly worn off so it came out as a little rough.
But the chick glared back at me, unfazed. “Well, it’s not like she’s supposed to answer any of your questions, either.”
“Liz?!”
I gotta give it to her. She had guts. But then again, it shouldn’t have come as that big a surprise in the first place: she’s got me by the horns, after all. If anything, I was the one being hard-headed here when she could spill my secret all over the girl next to her any minute she wanted.
“What?” She shot back at her friend, defiance dripping everywhere. Rina let out an exasperated sigh before turning to me.
“I’m sorry. She’s a little frisky right now.”
“When isn’t she anyways?” That sparked off some chuckles on our side and I cut Elizabeth off as she opened her mouth. “Alright, I gotta go.”
“Hey, Nicole,” I looked back over my shoulder as I heard Rina called, “I mean, Nik.”
I half turned and nodded for her to continue.
“Thanks.”
It was strange that with a smile, she turned me from Patrick Bateman to Buzz Lightyear. And not even remembering to wash my hands, with quick feet, I walked out of the rest room, feeling something was supposed to be clear to me by now.
But what it was- I had no idea.
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