I felt like insects were crawling over every inch of my skin.
Just a while ago, I heard Aqia Mama and Tashfeen Papa talking about my marriage. Another marriage once again. It made my mind recall everything from a year ago. When Sarim entered my life, tried to harass my intellect by molding me in his twisted ways, my wedding to him, my divorce on the first night as a wedding gift and then finally the news that he was a fraud and I became a victim.
I still remember that night. It was bigger than any horror. I didn't have any courage to face that humiliation again. But I couldn't deny them here. They were right in their place. I wasn't their daughter and it was a blessing that they cared about me. They wanted the best for me and didn't want to delay anymore. So maybe that was why I would not be able to reject it again. These were one of the few times I missed my real parents. Aqia Mama and Tashfeen Papa were like my parents but they weren't real. I couldn't oppose them in many places. Hope you got my point. I am very bad with words Besides, I didn't want to put a burden on them anymore. I would rest my case once again to Allah Almighty and then my new family. Overthinking would once again lead me toward darkness.
However, there was one more thing as well. It was during the first time too and this instant as well. And this was the feeling of my imagined dreams again disappearing and rotting. I had practically given up on the fact that someday Huzaifa could be mine even in my wildest dreams ever since I went on that date with him. Maybe it had relinquished the hope inside of me. And now even if I saw dreams about him, I didn't give them any second thought. I was crazy but not that crazy to ask for something which was even way more impossible.
The star was going away farther and farther away. Wanting to keep an eye on it and have it was idiotic.
Her phone beeped and she was interrupted by it as usual. Unaiza dropped the pen in the middle of the diary and darted her attention to it. A different yet bleak gloss appeared in her eyes when she saw a message from Huzaifa.
"Thanks for wishing me a birthday. I would have loved to eat that cake but alas; your Tashfeen Papa messed up everything. Btw, I hope you would have eaten my share of cake as well."
It was after thirty-two hours he had seen her message and replied to her. He must be so busy because of work and other things that he could not get time to check her text perhaps. Unaiza bit her lower lip and couldn't understand what to think right now. As the first time, she should again prepare to bury her love for Huzaifa deep inside before becoming someone else's.
She was still in her thoughts when her phone rang. It was a video call from Huzaifa this time. Why was he doing that? Sensing any bad, she got up and rushed to close the door of her room. No one should know that she was in contact with Huzaifa. She received the call nevertheless. It revealed him and Azan on the screen. Her eyes relished at his sight. In a blue T-shirt which was perfectly hugging his muscular body and sweatpants, he was looking even more handsome to her. After perhaps a year, she saw him and now she couldn't believe in her own eyes.
"Glasses, you should tell him that you are Iza. He will soon cause a chaos by calling me Iza, Iza continuously."
She couldn't understand what he was saying because her mind was preoccupied. Her heart was beating so swiftly against her ribcage that she was afraid it might burst out of her chest. She looked at Azan who was looking at her way curiously with big blue eyes. Huzaifa had made him stand between his legs on the couch.
"What?" She asked.
"Mr. Small Blast thinks that everyone who is a guest at his house, his name is Iza. Hey, she is Iza. Unaiza. I am not Iza. Only she is Iza," Huzaifa said to Azan who started giggling.
"Iza," Azan again whispered.
Huzaifa sighed and hit his hand on his head. "My goodness. Baap pe gya ha bilkul."
Trans: "You are exactly like your father."
Unaiza smiled at the screen. "Hi, Azan."
"Hi. AssalamoAlaikum. I am Azan. I am three years old. Very soon, I will go to school. There will be so many swings there and I will take my lunch box in my school bag too. Mumma and Daddy will buy me new books too. I will have fun like Aliyan Bhai and Eshal Api in school," he spoke in a breath as though it was instilled in his small brain. Maybe Nisha had taught him how to greet everyone like this once someone did it in the first place and the other things he learned by himself.
It caused both of them to burst into laughter.
"He is so cute," Unaiza complimented, already resisting an urge to hold Azan and kiss his cheeks.
Huzaifa ruffled his hair. "Robot. Baap lga ha bilkul."
Trans: "You seem exactly like your father right now."
Unaiza gave a sheepish look. "You are again talking about Ruhaan Bhai. Thori Sharam Kro. Bare hn woh hmsy."
"Have a bit of shame. He is older than us."
Huzaifa chuckled and snaked his arm around Azan's abdomen to steady him. "It's so fun, Glasses. It's so fun to bring a reaction out of Macho Man that you can't even imagine."
Unaiza shook her head but she was pleased seeing him happy. Huzaifa had nerves of steel indeed. He used to hide everything under this joking and fun of his.
"And yes once again, thanks for wishing me."
They cut the call after that and Unaiza again sensed a deep pit increasing and deepening in her heart. She again grabbed her pen and started writing about her feelings.
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One month passed like a second. Huzaifa was like flying in the sky with regard to his career and popularity. His Instagram followers reached 1 million finally and he was celebrating it with his fans. In short, he was thriving and no one could stop him. Some people had a perk of having amazing luck and he was one of them. Whatever he put his hand in, was received by positivity. While the things in Unaiza's life were jarring, to say the least. She didn't know whether they were good or bad.
To avoid any awful thing now, Aqia and Tashfeen were looking out for her proposals the friends and family. After further hunting and care, Tashfeen chose the son of his best friend for this. Sultan was in the army and as far as outer appearance and person were concerned, he seemed nice. But Haider said that he would take his time searching for all the information and they should only start the talk once he was enough satisfied with any proposal.
Unaiza herself too saw his picture. But every time, it brought memories of the first marriage. The horror attached to it wasn't leaving her side. Hence she just decided to go with Allah's plan and then her family's approval. If they liked him, then he must be good because they were cautious this time. And also, everyone wasn't the same. People get married anyway.
Right now, she was on the balcony with Jannat. She was styling the baby's hair as a hobby. After putting on the last clip, she regarded Jannat. She was looking so cute in a red floral frock reaching her knees and white leggings. Unaiza had meticulously braided small strands of her hair and then put colorful clips on every braid. The rest of her hair was falling on her nape. Ishmal had to go to some wedding from her mother's side and seeing the limited time, she offered that she would take care of the preparation of Jannat which Ishmal happily and gratefully accepted.
Unaiza kissed Jannat's cheek. "You are looking so lovely, baby. All bad eyes off."
She clicked a picture of Jannat. She would send it to Huzaifa. He would love to see Jannat looking like a fairy like this.
"Ma..ma..." Jannat mumbled as her eyes filled with tears.
Unaiza hugged her. "Aww. I'll take you to your Mama right away."
She lifted Jannat in her arms but stopped in her tracks seeing Ishmal already coming her way. The baby started crying till now.
Ishmal quickly rushed and took the wailing baby from Unaiza's arms and nuzzled her to her chest. "My daughter is looking so pretty. Adorable kids don't cry."
Jannat soon calmed down hearing her mother's voice and her warmth. She started playing with the lace on her shirt recklessly.
"Thank you Unaiza for taking care of her. You took half of my work," Ishmal chuckled.
"It's okay, Bhabi," she gently replied.
Ishmal herself was looking gorgeous in a white long shirt reaching her ankles having detailed mirror work and pink embroidery, white trousers, and a matching chiffon dupatta of pinkish white color. As usual, she was in bare minimum makeup and jewelry and the dupatta was placed delicately over her head.
"When you have to go, Bhabi?" Unaiza questioned.
Ishmal blinked. "Haider said that he would come in almost half an hour. Then we will leave."
Unaiza nodded with a smile.
"Can we talk, Unaiza, for a while?" Ishmal suddenly said.
Unaiza narrowed her eyes. "Of course, Bhabi."
"Look Unaiza, I know what happened with your first marriage must be triggering for you to again talk about but it's better to be safe than sorry again. Haider had asked me to have this discussion with you but I also wanted to talk to you," Ishmal started.
Unaiza began looking at her hands in her lap because she knew what it must be. They were sitting on the swing in the garden.
I...I am not very strong and definitely didn't have any courage to voice my thoughts back then in my house. Of course, it changed now as Haider cared for my opinion and you all are equally supportive. I was very troubled because I lost my father. And it caused me to have a very repressed personality. My...my stepfather..." She paused and took a deep breath to steady herself.
Unaiza lifted her gaze to her and found a wetness in Ishmal's eyes as though she was trying to control her tears. The mention of her stepfather might still be tormenting for her.
She sniffed her nose."You know this. My stepfather was trying to ruin my innocence by disguising it as a father's love. I thought that's how fathers were for a decade of my life. His actions were anything but fatherly but let him fulfill his desires by thinking that's how fathers show their love. I never told my mother because I was ignorant and didn't want to worry her."
Ishmal shrugged her shoulders as she continued. "You might be wondering, Unaiza that why am I bringing this up. But I couldn't find a better example to quote than this. We girls keep everything in our hearts so that our family won't get anxious for us. You also did that in Sarim's case. You accepted whatever he said and wanted when you yourself weren't comfortable with it; only so that your family wouldn't be worried. If anything bothers you this time, you will tell us right away without any fear. These were Haider's words when he asked me to tell this thing to you."
Unaiza just kept on looking at her as a tear fell from her eyes.
That same tear dropped on her diary and left a stain as well when she was writing on it.
I hope I could also get this courage which Ishmal Bhabi had now."
Taking a deep breath, she closed the diary and stood up to go to her bed. But she had to stop hearing voices from outside.
"Why did you meet him when I asked you not to?" It was Tashfeen who was asking this from Aqia in a loud voice.
That he must be Huzaifa. Did he find out?
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AssalamoAlaikum/ Hi dear readers!
How are you?
Here's the new chapter.
I hope you like it.
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