I was happy in the haze
of a drunken hour
but heaven knows I'm miserable now
~The Smiths~
𝔼𝕍𝕀𝕃𝕐ℕℕ ℙ𝕀𝔼𝕊𝕋
KAZ WAS IN A SOUR MOOD, but I'd now decided that it was not in fact a mood, instead it was just his personality. The night before we left, Inej was kind enough to lend me some clothes. I kept my own corset but put on one of the few skirts she owned,which of course was black, as well as a dark blue, very loose undershirt.
"I didn't hire you simply to get us across the fold," Kaz started as we bumped along the road, "you're with us cause you help smuggle grisha our of the little palace, and that's the location of our target."
"Sun summoner," Inej added quickly. I learned very quickly that Inej was a woman of faith, which I thought was quite respectable, and I also learned that Inej was like really cool, but I guess that's just an opinion.
"Alleged," Kaz frowned.
I shrugged, "I mean they wouldn't keep a fraud in the most secure location in all of Ravka would they?" I once again noticed my Ravkan Accent against their Kerch, but ignored it against the dirty look I got from Kaz.
Inej smiled at me but Kaz just kept talking.
I zoned out as Kaz and Arken spoke.
We soon arrived at the inn where Nina(as Jesper informed me) would be.
When we got to the room no one was there.
"She knew to expect us," Arken frowned.
"She isn't late, she's gone," Kaz started.
"Pst, what is that?" I whispered to Jesper who seemed to be eating something.
"Pastry, wanna try?" He whispered back, I nodded and we shared the rest.
While we were eating, Arken and Kaz discovered that Nina must have been taken by the Druskelle.
"That explains why the innkeeper was counting ferdan money," I spoke with a bit of food still in my mouth.
Kaz gave me a look, "What?" I then pointed to myself, "Traveling circus, I've seen all kinds of money, thought you would have too, dealing with gambling and all."
"They had a clear line of attack," Inej put in, taking everyone's attention off me.
Kaz nodded, "take a look, make sure there aren't anymore surprises."
Then she was off.
"She's so cool," I watch having finished the last of the pastry. Kaz rolled his eyes at me.
"Well..." Arken sighed, "We've lost our way into the little palace."
I exited with everyone when Inej dropped down from above, "All clear."
My eyes widened.
"This seems like a reasonable junction to abandon this whole sun summoner plan." Arken suggested.
"Abandon?" Kaz almost sounded offended, "we're in this now, and I know what a million kruge mean to me. What does it mean to you?"
He looked first at Inej, "Freedom."
Then Jesper, "Fun, like, a few months at least," he smirked.
Kaz didn't stop to look at me which was fair. I already knew I wasn't getting a cut. I was here because I wanted in on the heist not the money.
Lastly he looked at Arken, "Retirement."
"Right, so we press on." Kaz held so much authority when he spoke I felt the need to do exactly as he said, but, because I was what some may label 'a defiant little shit', I knew it wouldn't happen. "you get us across the fold and I'll figure out the rest on the other side."
"Fine." Arken put down his briefcase that I hadn't even realized he'd been carrying.
"To cross, I'll need twenty pounds of alabaster coal, a peck of Maldaloun Jurda, not the kind from Kerch, it's too weak." He then looked over at Jesper, "and a... goat, yes. Now we meet in the dead of night, there's a wreckage of a skiff northeast, on the edge of town. So? Who gets what?"
"Inej, Jurda. I'll get the goat, and Jesper." Kaz approached him so slowly you almost would have guessed he were holding a knife, "just the coal, no detours."
"I won't gamble away our only hope of success, I promise." He grinned, holding up his hands.
"Um, I know I'm new but uh, what about me?" I coughed, ruining Kaz's little intimidation moment,
"You're coming with me, I don't trust you as far as I could throw you." He frowned.
"Alright" I shrugged and we were off.
I skipped a long side him, looking around to see where they might be selling a goat. The silence was getting annoying so I spoke.
"Come on Mr. Brekker, lighten up, a smile never hurt anyone."
"Obviously you've never lived where I have."
I frowned, "seriously though, thanks for letting me come with you guys, I know you don't really want me here but I promise I'll make myself useful-" then something caught my eye, "Um could we stop for just a second?"
"Not unless you've found the goat."
"Just one second I promise."
I stopped at a stand selling weapons, including hatchets similar to the ones we used back in the circus, "I'll take that one please!"
It had a navy blue and maroon striped leather handle and it fit perfectly in my hand. I then paid and returned to Kaz smiling.
"Wanna play twenty questions?" I asked, "you can go first!"
"Why did you get that?"
"Running joke, now-"
"What's this joke?" Kaz asked, breaking the rules.
"You have to wait your turn, man, you're bad at this game."
He rolled his eyes.
"You know if you keep doing that they're gonna roll right out of your head, anyway, my turn; why do you wear those gloves all the time?"
"Unimportant; now, what's the joke with the hatchet?" He dismissed.
I frowned but answered him anyway, "It was supposed to be an ax, but its that I'm gonna bash our newest ringleaders head in with it."My eyes darkened and a smile grew on my face, earning a odd look from Mr Brekker.
"Now my tu-"
"The goats are here pick one and lets go."
I quickly picked one and Kaz paid, walking down the street the stupid thing headbutted me right in the nose.
"Hey!" I exclaimed shifting the goat to one arm using the other to cradle my bleeding nose.
A long string of profanities left my lips as the blood dripped down my face and onto the ground.
Kaz narrowed his eyes, "Give me the goat."
"You sure-?"
"You're getting blood everywhere, give me the goat." so I handed him the goat, glaring at its stupid adorable face.
I grabbed a cloth from my pocket to help control the bleeding but it quickly soaked through.
We suddenly came to a crowd who seemed to be listening to a man speaking about West Ravka breaking off from the East, but I was only half paying attention as I was desperately trying to not bleed to death from my nose.
As the cheering died down I heard Kaz say, "Arken."
I looked where he was looking and saw Arken shaking hands with the speaker, "well I'll be damned."
My voice came out odd, sounding like when you speak while plugging your nose, which, I suppose, was basically what was happening. Kaz Handed me another handkerchief, before walking off; to which I accepted and followed.
Then, we saw Inej looking at what I supposed was a memorial or sorts. She must have noticed our presents as she looked over us.
"He's adorable."
"And a bitch," I grumbled, seeing as my nose had stopped bleeding, I decided to hold it till I could tape it properly,
"Don't get attached," Kaz replied to her, ignoring me again which I now assumed was kinda our thing. "I didn't think I'd have to specify no detours to you too, she already made us stop." He said gesturing to me.
"If you gave me just a few-"
Kaz cut her off, "Hope is dangerous and futile."She held tight to something around her neck and I gave her a sympathetic look."We have places to be," he finished and walked off, leaving Inej to walk a few paces behind.
"Kaz that was a little rude don't you think, I mean I would do the same thing if I were her, at least I know what happened to my parents,"I sighed before I continued, "don't you think she deserves just a moment."
"Keep walking Rabbit," He seethed, "I have better things to do then foster your sympathy. Besides, we all have debt to pay."
"I have a name you know," I mumbled but didn't say anything else; gripping the hatchet in my right hand and my nose in my left.
We made our way to the location Arken had specified and waited. My arm had grown tired so while we walked down to our mode of transportation, I ruffly taped it up, putting a piece of tape just on the bridge for now.
"Where the hell is Jesper," Kaz snapped.
Arken led us on, "Just a little farther."
"Landmines," Inej spoke sending an instant sense down my spine, like I remembered something, then the three of us stopped.
"We'll wait, follow the path you carve." I nodded to Kaz's plan.
"Oh, the sign, that was just my idea to keep people away," Arken shrugged, and so we followed him. As I looked around I began to feel a sense of nostalgia, remembering the first time I was here.
ℕ𝕀ℕ𝔼 𝕐𝔼𝔸ℝ𝕊 𝔸𝔾𝕆
(Third person)
Little Evilynn hid behind an older woman, scared to get off the death trap that brought her there. She missed the orphanage, the offer to join the circus was looking less and less appealing by the second. Hopefully it would be better when she arrived.
"I'm not going out there." She stated.
"It's alright, completely safe I promise," the conductor smiled down at her kindly, "I have to go but if you follow that path your clown friends will be there to pick you up."
She giggled when he said clown friends, "What's your friends name?"
"Poppy," He smiled one last time and that was the last time she saw him.
"Hm..." She carefully stepped off the cart and followed the path with the refugees. Suddenly a loud bang sounded beside her feet and she cried out, falling.
She twisted her ankle and couldn't get up, not to mention the scraps from the debris that flew out of the landmine.
𝕋ℍ𝔼 ℙℝ𝔼𝕊𝔼ℕ𝕋
Panic took over me as I realized I was in the middle of the mines, I stopped.
'keep moving, you've done lots of dangerous things before ,I mean come on, walk!' I yelled in my head, slowly moving one foot in front of the other. The dread in my just kept growing but I kept pushing, 'I'm not eight anymore, I'm not stupid enough to step on the wrong mine.'
Neither of the two noticed my panic when I spoke, "I never thought I'd be here again." I assume the two had forgotten I had been in this exact place, years ago,because Inej's eyes widened and she gave me a sad, and sympathetic look.
"It's one thing hearing about it-" Inej looked around.
"It is nothing compared to what lies within," Arken's voice was quieter then before, which was definitely not comforting.
As I looked up at the fold every muscle in my body tensed, every nerve screamed and every bit of conscience I had left demanded I turn back. The giant black shadow boomed and crackled exactly as it did when I was a child, just wanting a home; little Evilynn was naive, she thought all her problems could be solved by pretending, and now I was stuck doing just that, not knowing any other way.
'The smile doesn't drop till the show is over,' and this nine year show had yet to let it's curtains close, so I smiled to keep myself together, and kept going.
AN: Little sneak peak into Evilynn's past. The first half of this chapter I don't love but I'll deal with it. Again it'll get better, I promise.