F O R T Y - S I X
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TW ⚠️: Discussion of abuse
"Princess?" Minho came walking over to me.
It was dark outside by now. We saw texts of everyone else that they were in the city and would have dinner there, too. So Minho and I stayed in my room.
He had a serious, concerned look on his face as he sat down on the bed, right in front of me. "Can we talk for a second?"
I put my book down. "Yeah, of course. What is it?"
"Well... I don't know how to say this." He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Okay. Uh... so, about what you told me today... the relationship you had in the past— I'm not jealous or anything that has to do with that, I just want to... clear things up."
"Okay." I nodded. This was it. He wanted rules. Here it would start. But if I just behaved it would be fine.
"Uh." He seemed in a loss of words. "So your ex didn't allow you to look in his phone?"
"Nope." I smiled. "I like that that's different with you. Have you ever been in a relationship before?"
"No, I haven't. Not really."
"Oh. Hm." I rested my back against the wall. "But you do know what to do? Have any ideas?"
"Of...?"
"Rules." I said. "I mean, apparently you do allow me to look through your phone. But what can or can't I do? I can hang out with Thomas, right? You told me I could."
"Yeah... right." He blinked a few times, looking so shocked it confused me. "Rules?"
"Mhm." I nodded. "Rules."
"Quinn..." He started. "There aren't supposed to be any rules in relationships."
A frown formed on my face. "Yes, there are."
"No." He shook his head. "That's not normal."
"What do you mean?" A shiver ran down my spine. "Not normal?"
He was silent for a long time. Just watched me with his lips pressed together. "All right. I'm just gonna ask you some questions, you'll answer me. Yeah?"
"Okay."
Minho scratched the back of his head. "What kind of... uh, rules, did your ex have?"
I looked at the ceiling, thoughtful as I summarized the rules. "No hanging out with other boys, looking on his phone, sleeping in a bed with him during my period, no going out without letting him check my clothes... and more, but I don't remember everything. I guess we have to go through them again. I don't want to break any rules."
He stared and stared and stared, mouth half open but nothing coming out for a long time.
"Okay. Uh, right. And what if you broke the rules?"
"Depended."
"On...?"
"Which ones I broke." I said it as if the answer was obvious.
"What did he do if you broke the rules?"
I shrugged. "He mostly hit me. Not too hard— well, maybe sometimes... or, all of the time. No, not all of the time. I can't say that. Uh, just depended again."
The color was disappearing from Minho's face. "He hit you?"
I nodded again. "Mostly. What do you do?"
He let out a shaky breath. "What?"
"What do you do?" I repeated. "The consequences?"
He swallowed. Deep. "Quinn, Princess, do you think it's... normal? That your ex hit you?"
"Yes." I confirmed. "I broke too much rules. He didn't like it. I think that that's why maybe I got more scars than Teresa or Sonya or Harriet."
He was muttering 'messed up' over and over again. So many times it got me confused. I frowned deeply, and blinked a million times.
"Look." He scooted closer to me, now making sharp eye contact. "It's not normal for someone to hit you, yeah?"
"But it is for you... right?" I was turning unsure about my own statements. "You can."
"No. I can't." He said. His hand lay on my knee. "It's not normal, Quinn. Rules aren't normal. All the things you just told me are not normal. Hitting someone isn't normal."
Tears were forming in my eyes and I didn't get why.
"That's toxic, Princess." He cupped one side of my face. "It's not okay. It's abuse."
"No." I whispered. One tear fell. "Abuse is... is when... it's when... oh."
He smiled in pure sorry. "Abuse is when someone treats another person cruel or with violence. Repeatedly, Quinn. That's abuse."
A lump blocked my throat and almost my windpipe. I kept shaking my head, unable to believe it. "But— but he wasn't always treating me like that. He was very nice... sometimes."
"I know." He wiped a tear off my cheek with his thumb. "And that's called manipulation. Emotional abuse."
"So there's no rules or consequences?"
"There aren't." He caressed the back of my hand with his fingers. "And I'm never ever going to hit you. Never."
I shivered a few times, the new thoughts slowly getting in my mind. "But then why did he? Why did he hurt me?"
"I don't know." He muttered. "I don't know and I don't get it, either."
"I thought... I thought he— I don't know." I looked down, more tears dropping.
"This is gonna sound really harsh, but you have to listen, all right?" Minho lowered his voice. "He knew exactly what he was doing to you, Quinn. He knew exactly how to hurt you and how to bring you down. How to control you. But this..." He motioned at my body. "That's yours. Not his to control. No one can control your body, mind, or actions." He told me. "Not even me... and I won't."
He wiped away every single tear that leaked from my eyes.
"He can't decide what you do and what you can't do. Who cleans and who does this. You decide that together. I don't know everything that you went through, but I know that if you ever say no to anything, I will listen. No matter if that's sexually, going somewhere together... or anything. No is no." He continued. "I won't ever hurt you. There's no rules, Princess. None. You can hang out with whoever you want. You can wear whatever you want, go wherever you want, eat whatever you want. I don't care. All I want for you to be safe and happy."
Tears and tears and tears.
"He said he wanted me to be safe too. That's why he made the rules."
"But they're not healthy." Minho pressed his forehead to mine. Took both of my hands in his. "I want you to know what it's like to be in a healthy relationship. Where we can trust each other. Talk about anything, and be interested in whatever we talk about. I'll listen to your talks, you listen to mine. Talk about our problems and feelings."
I nodded slowly. "Okay. I think I got that." I whispered. "But I'm sorry if I ever... I don't know, do something weird."
"Then that's okay. Don't apologize. You just have to get used to it." He promised. "I'll be patient."
I nodded another time. "Thank you. For telling me. And... everything. Thank you."
His eyes closed as his hands held mine tighter. "Anything." Then he wrapped his arms around me, embracing me in a firm hug.
I hugged back, quietly crying in his shoulder. This... this made me feel safe. Not forced. He was caring. Sweet. Patient. He didn't need sexual touch to feel loved like Aiden needed. He could use his words to communicate, not just his hands.
"I love you." I whispered. "So much."
"I love you too." He murmured, his breaths hitting the skin of my neck.
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A/n: I'm literally so excited to write their whole relationship and how it evolves, like the way Minho will continue to help her in the future and how healthy it is.
Hope you enjoyed!! x Vera