After another day of classes, I had finally had enough.
I couldn't keep pretending like this didn't bother me.
I needed to talk to the others.
I was done with this silent treatment.
As I left Divination, I began marching my way towards the common room, deciding that was the best place to begin, hoping that either Ominis or Sebastian were there.
Although, I was definitely hoping for Ominis.
No matter how I felt now, it seemed the situation with Sebastian had become far too complicated in my mind.
However, just as I had finished descending the stairs, I felt someone grab my arm, pulling me under the staircase, out of sight.
I turned to confront whoever had grabbed me, slightly hoping it was one of the others taking initiative to talk to me first, but it wasn't.
Instead, my heart dropped to my stomach, the determination I felt before disappearing, replaced with dread.
It was Hunter.
"What are you doing?" I whispered harshly, snatching my arm away from him.
"I wanted to check to see what was happening." He shrugged, not seeming bothered by my reaction.
I gave him a puzzled look, not sure what he meant by that.
I could give him a thousand answers to that question, but what exactly had he picked up on?
"What do you mean?" I finally asked, fully facing him now.
"You and your friends have been acting weird. And so has Sage. So what happened?" He explained bluntly.
I paused at the question.
How did he even know that?
And what did he mean that Sage was acting weird?
Was it because of the other day?
"Are you spying on me?" I asked, curious as to how he observed these things.
Yet, it seemed my suspicion was correct, as he rolled his eyes as though it were obvious.
"Can you blame me? Sage seems to have lost her mind since the winter break. All she ever talks about is you."
My eyes widened at his words, the images once again beginning to play in my mind.
I still couldn't believe she had threatened my friends, because the Sage I grew up with would never go so far.
She had changed since I left.
Maybe my father had gotten worse.
Maybe it was because of me.
I shook my head, hoping the images would disappear.
Thankfully, they did.
But now all I felt was guilt.
Because he had suffered too.
"It has nothing to do with you, Hunter." I said, my voice low and small.
I hadn't even convinced myself that was the case, so it didn't surprise me that he didn't believe my words.
I heard him sigh in annoyance, earning my attention.
"Will you stop with that? You and Sage are exactly the same. I'm not some little kid anymore. I can help." he insisted, stepping forward.
I'll admit, for a moment, there was a part of me that believed him.
I debated telling him everything.
But I knew in the long run, he would only end up in danger, and I wouldn't do that to him too.
He was right, Sage and I were the same, at least in one way.
We would do anything to make sure he was protected in a way we never were.
"I appreciate that, but I won't put you in the middle of this." my voice was more stern now, but I could still hear the concern and sadness seeping through.
I hoped he understood why it had to be like this.
Even if he hated me for it.
He glared at me for a while, like he was trying to see if I was serious, looking out for any sign of hesitation.
But he didn't find it.
I wouldn't let him.
Eventually, a defeated look washed across his features as he rolled his eyes again, straightening up as he began to walk away.
However, as he walked past me, he left me with one last thing.
"Fine. But just so you know, I'm on your side."
I turned around in surprise, not expecting him to say such a thing, especially since he didn't even know the extent of the situation.
I watched as he continued to walk away like nothing had happened, letting the emotions loose on my features.
We hadn't seen each other in years, how did he even know he could trust me?
After all this time, did he really still believe I was worthy of it?
As the emotions swelled inside me, I debated what to do next.
I'd never felt so conflicted.
A part of me wanted to run after him, to find out more about Sage and our family since I had left.
But another knew what I needed to do next.
I needed to finish what I'd started.
I needed to find the others.
The rest could wait for now.
Just as the thought crossed my mind, I spotted two familiar redheads walking past the staircase, chatting away.
Garreth and Blaine.
I know I had originally planned to find Ominis or Sebastian, but since the moment presented itself, it seemed like Natty and Poppy would be a good start instead.
I began to follow the two of them, keeping my distance so they didn't suspect anything.
Thankfully, they seemed to be too wrapped up in whatever they were chatting about.
As they finally turned to go down an empty corridor, I took the opportunity to swiftly run ahead of them, blocking their path.
The two jumped as I appeared seemingly out of nowhere, staring down at me as they registered what was going on.
"Where are Poppy and Natty?" I demanded, my voice coming out slightly louder than I'd wanted.
The two blinked in confusion for a moment before their expressions slowly began to change.
Garreth seemed to become quite nervous, looking anywhere but my eyes.
Meanwhile, Blaine looked at me with furrowed brows, concern brewing behind his eyes as he pursed his lips, not too sure what to do.
"Why do you need to know?" Garreth asked, trying his best to play dumb as he stared at the floor, his face giving him away completely.
"You know why. Where are they?" I asked again, not in the mood to pry it out of them.
Garreth seemed to become more nervous at my answer, fixing his eyes to the wall beside him, pretending like I wasn't even there.
But Blaine didn't seem bothered to keep it a secret, sighing as he saw how obvious Garreth was making it.
"If they're still keeping their distance, maybe they just need more time?" Blaine suggested, his voice soft as he tried to calm me down.
And to be honest, it kind of worked.
My face softened as I contemplated his words, remembering their faces after the trial.
"I get that, but I really need to talk to them." I insisted.
No matter what our feelings were towards each other, this was far bigger than that now.
We needed to find those other relics.
I needed them.
The two looked at each other, exchanging unsure looks as they had a silent conversation, debating whether or not to tell me.
"Please. I miss them." I begged, feeling the emotions from before spurring up inside me again.
The two remained silent as they continued to stare at one another, until eventually, Blaine looked back at me, a kind smile on his face.
"Alright. We'll tell you."
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After talking to Blaine and Garreth, I managed to find out that Natty had accompanied Poppy to look after Persephone.
Wasting no time, I quickly ran over there, and sure enough, I found them both next to the pen, feeding the Kneazle's in silence.
I approached them both nervously, wishing I had planned out what to say, my mind going blank now that I was here.
"Hi." I said sheepishly.
They both turned to me, shock covering their faces, clearly I was was the last person they'd expected to sneak up on them.
"Can we please talk?"
They both paused, looking at each other for a moment, before nodding in agreement.
I wasn't quite sure where to start, I felt like there was so much that needed to be said.
Yet, as I looked at their expectant faces, hesitant as they awaited an explanation, the words suddenly began to fall out of my mouth.
"I'm sorry. I have done something terrible, and it is something I am never going to be able to take back. I can't even think of a good excuse as to why." I began to ramble, my mind going over the events at Rookwood's estate, causing my face to scrunch up in disgust.
"It's just... when he took me there... I knew he was going to kill me. He had caused so much pain for everyone. I mean, he was connected to Ranrok and Harlow. Not to mention he-" I cut myself short, not wanting to divulge the information about Anne.
It was Sebastian's decision whether or not they were told.
I stayed silent as I awaited their response, not sure what more I could say without it coming out as more rambling.
They didn't need to know every little detail, they could probably understand my reason.
And I doubted they would consider turning me in.
I just needed them to know I was sorry, and hope that it was enough to repair the damage.
"... why did you learn how to cast them?" Poppy asked, her voice small as she hesitated to ask.
The question caught me off guard slightly, causing me to look up at her in surprise.
Yet, I could understand why she would ask.
"With everything going on last year, I felt like I needed any advantage I could get. Doing all those trials and facing Rookwood and Ranrok on my own was... scary. It felt like it was my only chance..." I admitted, looking down again as I began fiddling with my cloak.
I heard footsteps approach slowly, but I didn't dare lift my head, scared of what I would be met with.
However, I didn't expect the sudden contact on my shoulder as a hand was placed upon it, causing me to look at it in shock.
It was Natty's.
My eyes trailed up her arm until I finally built up the courage to look at her face.
I expected to be met with disappointment, even anger, but instead, all I was met with was pity.
"I'm sorry that you had to face that alone." she said, her voice so sincere it brought tears to my eyes, causing me to look down again.
I didn't deserve such a response.
And before I knew it, I began to speak again.
"Growing up, my worst fear was becoming like the rest of my family, and after using those spells I realised I had become exactly that." I said, as though I were trying to push them away, convincing them I was like every other Black.
But instead, I was just met with more footsteps as Poppy approached, grabbing my hand as she did.
"You're not, Em. Remember what I told you about my family? You never judged me because of that, you even told me that I was succeeding in my fight to right what they had wronged. You are not where you came from, Em." she squeezed my hand, a small smile of encouragement tugging at her lips.
"But I don't even know how to make this right..." I admitted, my voice small as I tried to prevent it from breaking.
"Are you kidding? You saved Hogwarts! You helped us all when we needed it, from fighting Ranrok to aiding Garreth in his concoctions. Yes, you did something no wizard should do, but you are no ordinary wizard. We believe in you, Em." Poppy said, her voice more definitive than before.
I wanted to trust her words more than anything, but I couldn't help the feeling of guilt grow in the pit of my stomach, eating me up as they showered me with kindness.
"Really? But I didn't just do something wrong, I did something that would surely have me thrown in Azkaban." It was like I was trying to convince them of my fears, to get the reaction I deserved.
They would be completely right to abandon me now, to yell, to call me a criminal.
But they didn't.
"You also saved wizardkind from the likes of Ranrok and his Loyalists." Poppy retorted, causing me to pause again.
Did that really cancel out all the bad?
Had I really atoned for my crimes?
If so, then why did I still feel like this?
As new questions began to fill my head, I could only manage to ask them one.
"How can you forgive me for something like this?" my voice was still small, but I was still met with a soft smile from Natty.
"Because, while we haven't known each other long, the journey we went through last year was one that produced a bond I have never known before. I meant it when I said that your friendship was important to me. And I know you didn't take your actions lightly, which is how I know you will not stray down the same path as your family." She answered, her words as genuine as the time I visited her in the Hospital Wing.
As I looked between the both of them, a thought crossed my mind.
For the first time, I understood Sebastian and Ominis.
I understood why they were so entwined with each other.
Why, after everything, they found it impossible to let each other go.
After everything they had been through together, they were more than friends.
They were family.
"You're both important to me too." I smiled weakly, still trying not to let my emotions get the better of me.
"You're not alone this time, Em." Poppy reassured me, her smile still present.
My smile widened at her words, and before I knew it, I had pulled them both towards me, engulfing them in a hug.
I mostly did it to hide my face, tears dangerously close to spilling over.
But I also did it because I never knew how much I was scared of losing them.
And now I knew I would do whatever it took to fix my new family.