Jeon Jungkook
A man is always attracted tp the shiny things. Things that are opposite to his own soul. Things that make you feel better if you are near them and from the past two days I was feeling like that. To be near him. To be near his soul.
Why? I don't know the reason but I can tell that his innocence was in someway fascinating for me. Maybe I belong to a world where this concept doesn't exist and he is from a world where it does. What if I am luring him into my world and he ends up being corrupted like me.
It feels like he is not able to hurt even a little creature let alone a human being. The shyness in his eyes is the evidence of his pure soul. Pure things around a person like me gets destroyed. Like she did. To this day I blame myself for what happened to her. Maybe she was taken from me because she was too pure for me. Because maybe I did not deserve her.
But what if Taehyung..... Why I am thinking like that about him. I don't like him in that way. I just want to spend some time with him. It feels.... It feels normal. I too deserve something normal.
"Why are we waiting......" Hyunsjin scoffed.
"For Taehyung..."
"What? Why him? We are getting late... Don't tell me you are taking him with you." Hyunjin spoke his mind like he always do.
"He is in this mansion since the day we came, he is no prisoner and temple is safe space......"
"Okay but why are you bothering if he is bound or not..... Also, you are eating with him on dinners and lunches and God knows what...."
"It's just he brings me food and I can't turn it down it's rude....."
"When did you start thinking of these manners?" Hyunjin gave me a side eye.
"I always know how to behave.... Besides he's been through alot it seems.... I just don't want to be rude with him." I reasoned or so I thought.
"Woah..... Are you perhaps by any chance....."
"What Hyunjin?"
"Like him?" there I knew it he would say it. "I am straight...." I reminded him.
"Likeness doesn't care if it's dick or pussy." Hyunjin gave me a shoulder nudge.
"Can you please avoid these words.... We are about to visit a tem
............" I forgot what I was saying when he appeared.
Just a simple white shirt with white pants and his blue hair swayed beautiful as he stepped down. He looked more breath taking then the first day I saw him.
"See.... That's my friend is gay panic..... Welcome to the community." Hyunjin whispered.
"Hyung I am sorry, am I late?" He asked his beautiful hair just swayed as the wind blows.
"No, we just got here right Jeon...." Hyunjin nuged me making me return to reality.
"Yeah... Let's go and uhh... Hyunjin take your own car." I don't know why but it just came out like that.
"What in the....." I heard him groan.
On the way to temple, his eyes were out on the road and mine on him. He looked so amused watching the sea waves on the edge of road. "Hyung can I open it?" he asked me about the window and I nodded my head.
He seem to enjoy the feel of air in his hair. He didn't mind my presence enjoying his moment. I tore my gaze away when I felt a tug at my heart. I've never felt like this in past five years.
We entered the welcomed by priest along with some deciples.
I accompanied the priest and felt tug at my sleeve and turned to find him with a question in his sparkling eyes, "Hyung can I go to them?" I followed his eyes to where a group of kids that study at temple were playing and I nodded.
The ceremony took around two hours followed by a lunch that was queued. I came outside to take Taehyung with for lunch and he wasn't there where I left him. Neither were the kids.
I momentarily felt like my world has stopped. I looked around but nothing. I went around the temple going to the back yard hearing laughing and giggling sounds. I asked a kid playing and he gestured with his finger.
I followed and there he was and I felt like breathing again. Playing running around with those kids wearing a flower crown. He looked ethereal, from another world.
"Taehyung....." I ran to him. "Why did you leave I thought I've lost you can't you stay there where I left you...." I didn't know why it came out this aggressive.
"Hyung... I am sorry... I was playing then they wanted to show me these...." he poited at his flower crown.... "Sorry, I made you worried." he looked down.
"No.. Its... I shouldn't have talked like that with. Just come on and have lunch." I turned around but he held onto my sleeve.
"You.. Can talk to me like that.....You have the right." he whispered.
"Don't yell at pretty man mister." A little boy raised his finger on me. Well, I guess he made some fans.
Before I could answer he knelt down infront of the boy cupping his face, "No, he is a good man. It was my mistake. He was just worried."
"Ookay..... Sorry mister..." he said and ran away.
"They like you...." I said. "Yeah? These kids are really adorable." he giggled.
"And I have no right." I mumbled, continuing the last topic.
"You've hyung.... I give you this right." He smiled.
"Just don't scare me like that again...."
"I won't.... Can I say prayer in temple before lunch?" he asked and I nodded. Who I am to deny him anything.
He closed his eyes, joining his hands. Looking at him brought me an unknown serenity. In that moment, I forgot about everything and it was just him.
"What did you pray for?" I asked when he opened his eyes.
"I am not telling." he smiled.
"Then I am not leaving until you tell me."
"That's unfair hyung."
"It is what it is."
He sighed turning his body towards me, "I prayed that the man who helped me and protected me never encounters any misery in his life." he smiled.
"Did you pray for the miseries of a stranger?" I asked astonished.
"You are not stranger hyung, you are my protector, I would never wish it otherwise." he smiled and his words warmed my heart like the sun in cold winter days and maybe Hyunjin was right. Heart sees no labels.
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It was last night here, we had to leave at mid day tomorrow. So Hyunjin wanted it to be a relax day. For him there is no best relax day other than partying. We spend evening at club dancing and drinking. I have a good alcohol tolerance. I don't easily get drunk. As the evening turned darker the atmosphere of the club to. The reeking of alcohol got stronger.
For Hyunjin the party never ends at the club. He has a habit of taking party back home. This is how we are doing after party until the sun rises. Being in island house we are more open and free to do whatever we wanted.
It was around one in the morning when we came back two boys by his side and three girls by mine. On occasions like this, I let myself loose a bit. I forget my manners for a little while and enjoy. We were in the main lounge blasting music and having another round. One of the girls started to caress my thigh and other started to play with the buttons on my shirt. I was caressing her shoulder the girl that was on my right, music playing in the background. However, it didn't feel like before. Their touches and caresses felt cold, like ice.
I felt someone looking at me and when I raised my head, I found Taehyung standing in the gallery looking at me. Our eyes met for mere seconds but the sadness in his was loud enough for me to feel. He suddenly turned his back and moved away. That's when it came to me. I stood him up on our late night tea. I regret started to sank in my heart. I immediately stood up leaving those girls bewildered.
Without wasting a second, I made my way towards his room. I didn't bother to knock and went inside. "Taehyung....." he was facing the window.
"Oh hyung you are back." his voice felt a but shaky. My eyes fell on the cold cup of tea and I felt really bad.
"I am sorry Taehyung I....."
"Why are you sorry hyung?" he smiled but why did it felt cold?
"About earlier.. I lost track of time.... I..."
"No hyung, it's your life. You owe me nothing no explanations. I am happy that you were enjoying... Yeah about tea, I'll be back in 10 min." he said storming out of the before I could say something.
After exact ten minutes he came back with a fresh cup of tea and I felt more regret. "Taehyung.... You don't have to... You waited for me and I stood you up....."
"It's nothing... Here have this..." he smiled placing cup and sitting beside me on the couch.
"I am feeling ashamed......" I looked at him.
"There isn't anything to be ashamed of hyung." his voice all sweet while I just wanted him to yell at me, curse me for not coming ealier.
"This is our thing and I wasn't here."
"Doesn't matter hyung, it wasn't a permanent thing, we are leaving for Seoul tomorrow right...." hearing this from his mouth felt more heart wrenching.
I looked into his eyes, pleading silently to take those words back 'it wasn't a permanent thing' but he didn't he was just silently looking back at me.
"So, after tomorrow I am not gonna see you again?" I prayed he said no.
"Yes, probably. I will go to my hyung's farm house and lay low for a while." he smiled.
"Oh so you've already figured...." I massaged my palms "What if I needed this tea of yours again?"
He chuckled lightly, "I'll write recipe for you hyung so you can make it."
"I don't want recipe, I want it from you....." I swear it just slipped from my mouth.
"Sorry?" he furrowed his eyebrows.
I guess I need to be more clear, I moved to his side, placing a hand on his cheek, he flinched at my sudden touch but instantly leaned to it, "What if I want it from your hands?" my eyes fell on his lips. His beautiful lips.
"I am not following hyung what are....."
"Taehyung can I?" I asked with my eyes on his lips. He followed my eyes and gave me a shy nod. That was it. That was enough for me to place my lips on his and finally feel as if he was as intoxicating as his tea?
He was more intoxicating then his tea. At first he remained still but as my lips moved on his, he answered and welcomed them. I teased him with my tongue asking him to let me in, to taste him whole.
He did, he let me in by parting his mouth little. I pushed my tongue in and sucked on to his tongue bringing it into my mouth. My hand went on his nape and I pulled him more not getting enough while he held on to my arms. He tilted his head and I devoured him with more rigor. Slipping my tongue in and out until he and I were out of breath. I didn't want to but I had to pull apart from him to catch my breath and whispered my plea against his lips, "Taehyung please stay......."
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Ummmmm... Okay.... Thoughts?
Love from my side 💜