Giovanni-then
Walk the fuck away.
Walk away.
The second I closed her bedroom door I honestly felt like shit. I should've stayed.
I need to stop this arrangement, it's going to hurt me if I carry on.
This is the third time I've just walked away after we had sex.
It needs to be this way, in fact it needs to stop.
I head downstairs and climb into my Jeep. It takes a minute then Jax is climbing in beside me.
"Why the fuck are you ignoring me?" He asks as I pull out of his garage.
"Im not?" I say confused.
"I called you about five times back then." He tells me.
"Oh sorry, I didn't hear you." It's better to say that then to tell him that I was too lost in my own head about my whole situation with Amara.
He shuts up instantly taken back and just goes on his phone.
We head straight to one of our clubs.
When I get there I walk past the queue, past the guards on the door and head straight for one of the back rooms, Jax following behind me.
He tries to talk to me a few times but I'm in a bad mood.
There's only one thing on my mind which is bad. I need to focus and get ready for this meeting.
"Stop!" Jax grabs my arm.
"Don't pull me around." I turn to him.
"What the fuck is up your ass? You're acting like a complete dick." He tells me.
"Nothing can we just get this done please?" I ask gesturing to the office down the hall.
The quicker this is over, the quicker I can go and fix things with Amara.
No!
"Oh please don't tell me this is about Amara? She needs to get married and you can't commit to that." Jax sighs.
Why can't I? Because he isn't getting married anytime soon? Because he just had his heart broken? How is that fair?
"I can." I argue.
"You'd marry her?" He asks with a raised eyebrow as though he doesn't believe it.
I shrug.
"You can't marry her." He tells me.
I can.
"Fuck off." I say heading for the office.
***
One dead body and a quarter of a million dollars later I attempt to leave the office.
"Will you fucking talk to me? You listen to me go on day in day about Lara so can you just fucking explain?" Jax shouts, stopping me from leaving.
I stand, back to him, I contemplate running but I stand still.
"I like her." I admit to him.
I hate this.
"No shit. I gathered that, dumbass." He puts his glass down.
"You know you can't be the one to marry her." He says and I sigh. I know.
"She's had a shit life, she needs someone who's going to be there for her, be happy and kind to her, someone who will treat her right. Someone Matteo likes and someone who will be there for her and fight for her." He tells me.
He's just butt-hurt because Lara left him so I try to hard not to think about what he's saying because truthfully I could do all of that for her.
"You're normally good at friends with benefits, what's wrong with you?" He asks.
Feelings.
"I'm gonna head back home I think I'm just tired." I tell Jax and he nods.
"Give me a shout if you wanna talk." He tells me.
I nod but quickly rush to my keep, bypassing everyone.
****
Walk past her bedroom.
I don't.
I try opening the door but it's locked.
I softly knock on the door and wait for her to answer.
She doesn't.
"Amara?" I whisper.
"What are you doing?" Matteo asks making me jump.
I should be more aware, I normally am.
"I need to talk to Amara." I admit.
He raises an eyebrow and crosses his arm over his chest.
"About..." for fuck sake why is he not letting this go?
"She asked me earlier about some clubs?" I tell him.
"She's underage." Matteo tells me.
"So are you." I tell him.
"It's different." Matteo speaks up.
"How so? Because your a man and she's a women. I thought this was the exact shit you were trying to put a stop to?" I ask.
"I'm not a fan of the little crush you have on her." Matteo tells me.
"I don't really care." I shrug.
I don't deny it because I'd be an idiot to.
"She needs someone who will marry her." He tells me.
"I'm really sick of everyone telling me that. Why aren't I on that list of people you're making her speed date?" I ask him.
It's a genuine question.
What have I done in my life that's so bad that I can't ask the poor girl out.
The one time I like someone and I mean actually like someone and I've got everyone telling me I can't and that she needs to get married. Why can't that be me?
"I don't think you'd be a good husband. If I have to hand my sister over I need it to be to someone who will treat her right. I've spent my life taking care of her and I need to make sure someone else is able to do that." He tells me.
For the millionth time: why the fuck aren't I able to do that?
I like Amara, I want to take her on a date and explore things.
"Why don't you think that I can do that?" I ask him raising an eyebrow.
"She's a handful I honestly don't think anyone can handle her except for me, she respects me and she'll listen to me always. But with anyone else she won't. So I need someone soft, who will let her be herself and just be happy about who she is." He tells me. I can't be soft.
"Do you think you can do that? Be soft with her?" Definitely. "Soft in front of me, Jax, literally anyone? Because the second you disrespect her or even upset her that's it. You're done. She won't be happy." So basically he wants someone not in this line of work.
"Do you think you can sit at the club, around all the guys and defend her constantly but not too much because she can speak for herself and she knows how to handle men? Do you think you can let all those guys listen to you be sweet and kind to Amara and let them know she's the love of your life?" Matteo asks.
Fuck.
"No." I sigh.
"There we are then!" He shouts.
Amara's bedroom door swings open and she doesn't look happy.
"What the fuck are you two yelling about I'm trying to sleep?" She asks looking between the two of us.
She raises an eyebrow but none of us say anything. We can't upset her.
"Work." Matteo tells her.
She rolls her eyes and tightens her grip on her robe.
Don't think about what she's wearing underneath. She was wearing pink earlier but could be naked under there now or in a new colour potentially.
"Matteo?" Someone speaks up.
We all look in the direction of Matteo's room.
There's a girl there.
The blonde stands there in his shirt and is squinting to look at us all.
"I'll be back in two minutes." Matteo tells her. She nods and disappears further into the room.
"Hypocrite." Amara points in his face.
Matteo switches to Italian, not subconsciously and starts arguing with her in it.
He's claiming not to be a hypocrite and she's just ripping him a new one.
"Alright." I yell between the two of them.
"Bed." I point at Amara.
"Don't tell me what to do." She rolls her eyes.
I'm never going to win between these twins.
"Go back to whoever's in there." I tell Matteo.
"I think I'll watch you go to bed first." Matteo says.
"If you fancy me all you have to do is say so." I joke, he doesn't find it funny.
"Early night Amara you're meeting the boys tomorrow." Matteo tells her. I freeze.
What?
Already?
"Bed Giovanni." Matteo tells me.
Who the fuck does he think he is? I'm older than him and I'm his boss? Telling me to go to bed. Dick.
"I'm not staying here tonight." I walk away from them, down the stairs and home, to my apartment in the city.